Empty Silences.
A Brittana Story.
(All Santana's point of view)
Chapter One.
Some days, I wish the ceiling would just colapse right on top of me. Right before I open my eyes. I would be so immune to the pain, and even if I did have that sense of feeling, it would still be the last thing on my mind. I woke up this morning and everything felt different. Brittany and I have been together for almost six years now, well, an official relationship. It's not easy, nothing in life is ever really easy. I've fallen head over heels in love with Brittany, so I've decided to take the next step in our relationship. Brittany hates gold so I made sure I bought a pretty silver ring.
I glanced around the room while Brittany silently ate her breakfast. Brittany had been acting weird the last couple of days, it was like something was eating her up. I had asked her about it, but she just shrugged it off like it was nothing.
"Hey Britt?" I asked allowing my glance to turn to her.
"Yeah San?" She replied avoiding eye contact with me.
"Is everything okay?" I hesitantly asked, knowing I wouldn't get the truthful response.
"Why do you ask?" She shyly responsed, this time looking up at me.
I slipped off my chair and bent down infront of her, she flinched at my movement, but I carried on with my intentions. It was hard to understand Brittany, she was such a close minded person when it came to her feelings, she was always afraid of hurting people, but never herself.
"You know I love you, right?" I asked her placing my hands on her thigh.
"I know, I love you too". This time she smiled right before placing a gentle kiss on the tip of my nose.
"I have to get ready for work, San" She said before collecting her plate and placing it in the sink, and then making her way up the stairs.
I sighed at the memory of how our mornings used to be, huddled together on the couch until time struck that we had to actually drag ourselves back into reality. Now, Brittany is just distancing herself from me, from everything. Did I do something wrong? I've always looked for love in all the wrong places, even when I didn't want to come to terms with my sexuality, but I always had made an exception for Brittany. She was always the one person who stayed on my mind, no matter how many boys I tried to cover it up with. I know, that's selfish. But all my experiences has led me to Brittany, and if I hadn't ever told her my exact feelings towards her, things would have been so different. I have the most beautiful girl in my heart, and a engagement ring in my hand and a whole lot of feelings left unspoken and right now, I just want to let Brittany know I'm here for her.
Brittany was quick to leave for work earlier than usual without any acknowledgement of our relationship. I slumped into the living room chair and sat there for what seemed like hours. Until, my phone alarmed my attention.
- Quinn Calling -
"Hello?" I answered.
"Santana! I miss you and Brittany! Are you both home? I'm on my way over! We need to catch up!" Quinn said, barely taking a single breath.
Quinn was always the pretty one. Everybody loved Quinn. Out of everyone I met at high school, I always admired her for being so head-strong. She was put through hell and back and still managed to pick herself up every time. But when it came to boys it wasn't as easy as abc. Any man would have loved her in high school, if she just allowed them to see the real, natural her. Quinn is now married to Noah Puckerman, the bad boy. They live on the other side of Lima, so Britt and I hardly ever get to see our two bestfriends. They have two gorgeous children, Beth who is almost eight years old and Billy just turned three. Sometimes I think Quinn only married Puck because of their emotional attachment with the children because whenever Finn is around, she automatically slumps into a foul mood, but I don't think she ever notices herself doing it.
"We miss you too! Britt's at work and I'm moping around home. Still come over though!" I responded back to the blonde on the other end of the phone.
"Cool. See you soon!" Quinn said, as she slammed down the phone.
Brittany is more close with Quinn and I'm more close with Puck. But that doesn't stop me and Quinn ever catching up. I quickly released myself from the chair to race upstairs to change into something more decent. Just as I was re-applying my lip gloss I heard the door bell buzz.
"It's open!" I yelled from upstairs.
I heard the door slam shut and heard the sound of footsteps downstairs.
"It smells fruity in here San" Quinn said. "Where are you"?
"I'm upstairs, be down in a sec!" I laughed to myself and made my way down the carpet stairs.
"This place is looking great." Quinn said draping her arms around me bringing me into a tight squeezed hug. "I stopped at the shop and picked up your favorite biscuits!" She released her arms from around my shoulder and I saw she was smiling.
She had such a beautiful smile, when she chose to use it.
"Thanks Quinn" I said taking the biscuits from her hand and placing them on the coffee table.
Quinn placed her bag down beside the couch and sat down placing her hands in her lap, one of her biggest habits.
"How are you and Britt"? She asked tucking a strand of her blonde hair behind her ear.
"We're... We're doing okay" I lied. Quinn knew I was lying, I could see it in her eyes.
"Really?"
"Well, she's been kind of.." I paused. ".. Distant.. She doesn't even look at me anymore, it's like she's hiding something that could..." I trailed of before being interrupted by Quinn.
"That could what?" Quinn asked interested.
"Ruin our relationship, sometimes I think she forgets how important she is to me" I said, looking down at my hands.
There was silence and I was about to add something else in about Brittany's behavior but Quinn bet me to it.
"There is no doubt Brittany loves you Santana, maybe work is stressing her out. Don't take it to heart" Quinn said with a slight smile.
"I guess so" I responded.
As Quinn started to open the packet of biscuits the silence was invaded by my mobile beeping. It was a message from Brittany. I picked up my phone and read it.
Hey San, I might be a little late home tonight. I have an appointment. Don't wait up for me. - Britt xxx
I swear I re-read the text message about 5 times before hearing the sound of a question being asked.
"You look like you've seen a ghost! Who was it?" Quinn asked with a worried expression.
"Oh. It was just Brittany, she's going to be home late tonight".
This was really getting to me, was I making the wrong decision of asking Brittany to marry me? Does she even feel the same anymore? I let the over-thinking pass and sat back and enjoyed the time I was spending with Quinn. But every time there was an empty silence, I found myself thinking about Brittany and if it was my fault she was acting this way. I guess there's only way to figure out what was going on - I was going to ask her as soon as I could.