A/N: Takes place right after TATM. Hope you enjoy!

River,

I know that you're tired. Tired of the lies, of spoilers. Of never knowing when we'll be together again. I know that it doesn't always seem like I notice your pain, but I do. I see the loss and heartbreak in your eyes. I see the things that you try so desperately to hide. I hear the truth behind the words "I'm just tired".

Sometimes, the words "I'm just tired" means so much more than physical exhaustion. It's smiling at people to avoid the questions. It's faking every laugh because you don't have it in you to genuinely do it. Saying the right words, even displays of anger are no longer real.

Because it's more than sadness. More than loss of interest. It's more than needing sleep. You can't sleep, and even if you could, it wouldn't help. It's hiding the damage, keeping your issues drawn. It's so much more than a bad mood, or a bad day.

You wake up each day, after tossing and turning all night, and struggle to get out of bed. You hide the tears from the night before. You force yourself to go to the job that has become mundane at best, and you tell yourself that tomorrow will be better. And some days it is. Some days, one of your smiles reaches your eyes.

And still you shoulder the pain of listening to everyone around you, people who claim to care, telling you that you're okay, that the emotions and exhaustion are just part of life. You feel anything but "okay". You don't want to hear that you're "fine". You're not. But you're going to be.

One day, you're going to wake up and find the peace that you've longed for. One day, so will I. But until that day comes, just remember that you're not alone. What you feel is real. Your pain, your life, it all matters. Your breath moves the air for all of eternity. Some day, you won't say "I'm just tired". You'll say "I'm doing well". And you'll mean it.

It may not always seem like I love you, because that I don't know how to say it. Please remember that you mean more to me than anything in any known and unknown universe. I love you more than you could ever know. I would move the stars for you. Please try to remember that when you meet a version of me who is too young to appreciate how amazing you are. You are the person I trust most in the universe. Always and completely.

All my love,

The Doctor

River closed her diary and her eyes, clutching the book close to her chest. Tears that she didn't realise were falling dripped down onto her clothes, and she sighed. That man...that mad, impossible man. Damn, she loved him. It didn't ease the pain of losing her parents again, but it helped. Knowing that he actually cared...maybe she wasn't as useless as she'd always secretly felt she was.

The whoosing of the TARDIS caused her to jump, and she hastily wiped her eyes. The doors opened, and the Doctor stepped into the living room of her flat, smiling. His smile faltered a bit when he caught her slightly red eyes, and he immediately rushed over to her, taking her hand in his.

"River, what is it?"

She shook her head, a sad smile on her face. She brushed his hair back from his face, leaning in to kiss him gently. When she pulled away, she rested her head on his chest, breathing in the scent that was so uniquely him.

"Spoilers."

A/N: Well, there we are. Review?