Disclaimer: Unfortunately, I don't own anything.
Author's Note: Sammy's thoughts about the big brother that's been returned to him. Just something fun (for me) that I decided to throw at ya'll. Have fun!
Dean said he didn't remember anything. I asked him again and he said the same thing. Dean wouldn't lie to me. He can't. I've known him all his life, well most of it, I know all the signs. Heck, he won't even play poker with me anymore because of it. Even if that weren't the case., we don't hide things from each other. Every secret that I'd had, I'd eventually explained to him, and though he tried to hide a few things from me, like what Dad said that one time, or the deal he made, he always came clean in the end. So when I asked that second time and he looked me in the eyes and said those words, I know for a fact that he couldn't be lying.
Now we're back to business. Trying to track down whatever was big enough to haul him out of there. Even if I didn't already know the truth of the matter, I knew now. He snapped back into action like he hadn't ever been off the job. He's my same old brother again now, back to his vices, back to driving me nuts. He's still an idiot risk taker, but then so am I now. I wasn't kidding when I told him all those months ago that I was doing all I could to be him.
Still, there's something about him... something that seems off. Yeah, he cracks jokes like old times, but not as many of them, not by half, and he gets somber again as soon as he says them. I don't catch him loitering in bars as much any more. In fact... I'm not sure he's gone to one. He must have. That's just Dean. He's just been a little... strange lately, stranger than usual I mean, and in a different way. He's almost... almost taut, like a wire stretched over a canyon or something. Somehow I feel like he could snap at any moment. That's not the brother I knew. There are times when he just seems to gaze off at nothing for a few seconds. Then he'll snap back to normal. Dad used to talk about soldiers who did that, called it the Thousand Yard Stare or something. I never did pay enough attention to him.
Quite frankly, I'm a little worried about him. I know, I know, it's silly. Dean's my big brother; big, indestructible Dean; Dean who doesn't get phased by anything Dean. If anyone could go to Hell and back without a scratch to show for it, it was him. Heck, I'd seen him get full-on shot a couple times, and still pretend nothing was wrong with him. Pretend...
Sammy, Sammy. Stop worrying. He told you that he doesn't remember anything. He said it to you twice and looked you dead in the eye while doing it. He's not lying. Anyway, we don't keep secrets from each other. Never been able to, never really wanted to. Dean was fine as usual, it was just me that had changed. After all, I'd gone without my brother for four whole months. He would seem different from how I remembered him. No, he isn't lying.
I looked at my watch and cursed. I was late for a meeting with Ruby. Grabbing my coat, I slipped out the door as silently as possible.