Sheila Broflovski: You have been on that computer for over three hours, Bubbuleh. What have you been doing?
Kyle Broflovski: I've been applying to hundreds of jobs online for the last week and I can't believe I still haven't gotten a call.
Sheila: Not to worry…You're a bright young man. I'm sure there are many companies looking forward to hiring you, you just have to be patient.
Kyle [Groans loudly]: But how long do I have to wait?
The Red head's iphone suddenly starts to vibrate violently over his desk.
Sheila [Smiles]: Not very long, if you ask me.
Kyle [Answers phone]: Hello?
Voice Over Phone: Harro Shitty Wok, take ordaaa pree?
Kyle [Confused]: What the hell, take order please? [Chuckling] No, no. Mr. Lu Kim, I don't want to order; I sent a complete job application through your online website!
Lu Kim: Oohhh…you rittle Jewish boy raiii?
Kyle [Shocked]: What?
Lu Kim: Rittle Jewish boii make Shitty Wok a lot of moni…[Giggles over the phone] Forgee any tiin I say! Come to Shitty Wok imirietlee so I can intebeu...ok?
Kyle: Imidietly, got it. I'll be there in a few minutes. Thank you, Mr. Lu Kim!
Kyle drops the phone on his desk as he rushed to his closet.
Kyle [Anxiously]: What do I wear? [Kyle frantically searches through the endless amounts of orange parkas] Maybe dad has a suit he can let me borrow…
Moments later, Sheila watches a very formal dressed Kyle walk down the stairs.
Sheila: Hold on a minute, Bubbuleh. [She points to her son's messy red hair] You're not thinking of going to your job interview with that mess of hair are you?
Kyle [Annoyed]: Ah, mom…come on.
Sheila: You come on. Here, let me just run a comb through that…a little hair jell and presto!
Kyle smiles at his mother.
Sheila [Kisses her son on the forehead]: The very best of luck to you on your job interview.
Kyle [Smiling sweetly]: Thanks mom!
The Red head feels a cool breeze against him as he dashes toward the icy streets of South Park toward the only Chinese Restaurant around town.
As he entered the doors of City Wok, a blast of warm air seemed to soothe out his freezing body.
Lu Kim [Impatient]: You twenty minute late.
Kyle [Looks up at clock]: It only took me five minutes to get…
Lu Kim: I fogibe you now. Next time, you won be so lucky. Come to kichen.
Kyle: Wait…don't I get interviewed?
Lu Kim: Shitty Wok no haff time fo intebiew, noooo. Shitty Wok nee peepo to work now.
Kyle: Oh…[Grins] Well. That's great! That means I have the job for sure!
Lu Kim: Come to kichen now pleass.
Kyle: Sure, let me just get an apron.
As the Red headed boy walked to the corner to grab an apron, he noticed a large bucket filled with brown gooey substance that sat before him.
As he approached the brown bucket, a displeasing stench overpowered his nostrils.
Kyle [Covers his nose with one hand]: Uhh…
Lu Kim: Come now! Get apwon and come!
Kyle grabs the apron and scurries to Mr. Lu Kim's location.
Lu Kim: Yo job iss to put on a paur of globes, ya? [He puts on a pair of gloves] Then you gwab da meat, ya? [Grabs a whole chicken] And den you dip in secwet Shitty Wok sauce befow you cook, ok? [Points to a large vat of the same brown substance Kyle had seen before] Now stawt!
Kyle [Puts on a pair of plastic gloves]: Yes, sir! [Grabs a whole duck and begins to dip it inside the large vat of brown substance] What is this stuff anyway? [Kyle approaches the vat to closely inspect the overpowering smell] I wonder what the secret sauce tastes like… [Kyle dipped his finger in the vat and brought it to his lips] Huh? [His mouth twitches and jerks in disgust after he removes his finger from his mouth] This is…fucking Shit!
The red headed boy runs screaming from the double doors of City Wok as Mr. Lu Kim runs toward the door.
Lu Kim: Ey? What you tink you doen? You fire from Shitty Woooooook!
A week Later
Kyle and his three other friends sat in front of the televison as they watched Terrance and Philip.
Eric Cartman [Munching on some potato chips]: I'm hungry you guys.
Stan Marsh: Yeah dude, me too. You guys want some Chinese food?
Kyle [Screams out suddenly]: N00!
Stan, Kenny, and Cartman all stare at him in surprise.
Kenny [Muffled]: Why the hell not?
Kyle: Trust me, you guys don't want to know…
You see, I learned something today.
I learned that there was a reason why Mr. Lu Kim always refered to City Wok as "Shitty Wok".
Well, now you know.
Thank you for reading my first South Park Fan Fiction! :]