Note: This is not really normal. But I've had the idea in my head for ages and didn't know how to write it. I don't know if it feels as right as I would like it to…but I tried. I like the idea not so much this fic haha. Enjoy. Btw these are idiotic characters talking at times, not me. Also a shout out to "Platoon" and "Fallen Angels".
Collins put his hand on the wall of the shower. The sounds of helicopter blades swiped in his head time and time again. The buzz of the radio system and the cruel laughs of the half drunken pilots. He rested his head on the tiles, closing his eyes.
"How long do you think he's gonna last Harry?" The pilot asked his copilot laughing with a hack of lung cancer on the way.
"I'd give the little shit a few days. He meets the Cong and he's long gone." The copilot chuckled shaking his head.
A small black boy, who was passing himself off as eighteen, hid in the back of the helicopter looking down at the jungle where he would soon live. It wasn't the jungles he enjoyed as an even smaller boy. The colorful birds in the trees. The colorful frogs bouncing from leaf to leaf. The jaguars stalking their pray. Instead this boy would be stalking human beings. At first the thought of killing someone else was exciting. Now he wasn't sure.
Not like he had a choice. It was either this or become a beggar on the street. He needed to go to school, his parents wouldn't pay. He didn't have a cent to his name. This way he could afford it…after he served his duty. However, according to Harry, he wouldn't survive the next few days. So much for living for the future. He'd have to just live one day at a time. And see if he survived. His knuckles tightened themselves around his gun.
"Collins!" Angel called out, "Are you home?"
Collins snapped out of his stupor, "Yeah, baby, I'm coming." He yelled from the shower, turning off the water.
"You got a package today. Did you order something for school?" She asked through the door. Collins hopped out of the shower and barely bothered to dry himself off. He exited with a towel covering his bottom half.
"Um…no." Collins muttered grabbing his cap from the table and putting it on his head.
Angel shrugged picking up the package, "It's kinda small…are you being proposed to through mail?" She asked giggling to herself.
"Naw." Collins said walking in the bedroom to change.
Angel blinked a few times. The Collins that she knew would banter back. Say that he had a secret admirer across the country but he'd have to let him down easy…as Angel was his love muffin. That's what he should have said. Not "naw".
She walked over slowly to the bedroom, "Tom…is everything ok?" She asked quietly, "You feeling ok?"
"You ok, kid?" A man asked who seemed to be covered in dirt from head to toe. The other platoon soldiers called him Toad. It fit since he had large bulging eyes as well as an annoying voice, "Green horn? I can tell." Toad laughed watching the boy join their platoon for the first time. "Can't believe we got us another blackie. I mean c'mon I'm all for integration but I'd rather the numbers be in our that was all a joke Bishop."
A dark skinned man glared down at Toad. He was tall and very dangerously thin, "You lie on your application bout your age, kid?"
The boy gulped looking down at his combat boots, "What…how did you know?"
"You look greener than green." Bishop said slowly pulling off pieces of equipment from the boy's pack and dropping them on the ground, "Where you from? Mississippi? Georgia?"
"Yeah. Georgia." The boy said watching the equipment fall, "Don't…don't I need that?"
Bishop shook his head.
"Don't they shoot black folks for fun down there in Georgia?" Toad asked laughing.
A pale man with red hair walked over, "Hey Toad. Shut the fuck up. And kid…stay close all right. We loose half of them in the beginning."
The kid held the gun to his chest and walked up to Bishop, "He's exaggerating right?"
"Wish he was kid. Wish he was." Bishop said patted his shoulder, "Bet you wish you were back in your girlfriend's arms now, huh?"
"Collins?" Angel muttered sitting down next to him, "Are you ok, baby?"
"Yeah…it's just a bad day. Today is always bad." He said lying down on the bed and covering his eyes with his hands. Angel glanced at the calendar. August 8th. She searched her brain trying to remember if Collins ever mentioned the date before. The tone in his voice told her that he wasn't willing to share if she asked. She sighed in defeat and lay down next to him.
"I love you." She whispered kissing his cheek, "You know that right?"
"You know that right?" Toad asked spitting across the way, "They really do. They pray to their gods and then they believe that the shit we toss at them can't hurt them. So whatca you gotta do is you gotta do this little dance-"
"Toad, shut up." The man with red hair said paging through a book on philosophy, "Can't you see the kids scared shitless? Leave him be."
"Thanks a lot homo…but I ain't gonna get in that tent of yours and fuck you. Sorry that's not my thing." Toad said laughing at his own horrible joke. The boy gulped wondering if he knew. If somehow he figured it out.
The red head, his dog tags read Mitchell, rolled his eyes, "Go to hell Toad."
Toad saluted him, "I'm already there. Didn't you notice. This shit hole is-"
Shots broke out above them. The boy froze, and all he could do was hold his gun. Even if the Vietcong came over to them, they wouldn't be able to peel that gun from his hands.
"Come on kid, shoot them!" Mitchell screamed into his ear. Instead the boy closed his eyes wondering what he was doing there. This wasn't his place. He was supposed to be in school learning. Not in a foreign country killing complete strangers.
But he was snapped back into reality when Mitchell screamed, withered, and died a few inches away from him. His book fell onto the ground covered in its owner's blood. The boy didn't know this guy…but Mitchell did defend him. And he was one of them.
The boy jumped up and aimed his gun. He killed his first Cong. And it wouldn't be the last.
"Yeah…I know." Collins whispered back.
Angel kissed his cheek gently, "Don't you wanna see what's in the box?"
Collins glanced over at Angel and for a moment she broke his stupor. Her half hopeful and half worried face. She was so much more beautiful than anything imaginable. Collins cupped her face and smiled gently, "I know you do. Go get it."
"Thank God!" Angel said leaping from the bed to get the package, "It's just been calling to me. And I didn't want to open it since…it's for you."
"Who's it from?" Collins asked leaning up and hoping for a distraction.
Angel turned the palm-sized package around, "Ummm…that's a cruel name. Toad Todelson."
"Toad!" The sergeant yelled, "What the hell are you doing? We're supposed to digging foxholes. Stop jerking off and get to work."
Toad rolled his eyes and spit onto the ground, "Yeah Sarge. Why didn't this pissant get yelled at?" He asked pointing to the boy who was studying Mitchell's philosophy book.
"Cause he can't actually shoot. You couldn't hit your mother's fat ass." The sergeant explained eloquently. The boy smiled going back to the book. It talked about things that he always wondered about. How people thought, why they were alive, and of course the worth of love. The library in the boy's hometown contained only kiddie books and a few of the classics. His town was too religious for such things as books. After all, the devil was found in the library. The boy figured that if the devil was in this book, then it certainly fit his current surroundings.
"Hey Tommy!" Toad called out.
The boy looked up, "It's Thomas, idiot."
"Oh…look the greenhorn has a back bone. Are you gonna help me with this or not, dipshit?" Toad asked grabbing a shovel.
"Not." Tommy said without taking gaze from the words of Kant. The men in the platoon laughed to themselves.
Bishop smiled while he shoveled his own hole, "The kid's getting a backbone. Bout time."
Toad groaned thrusting his shovel into the earth, "Yeah the asshole."
"Who is Toad? Do you know him?" Angel asked wondering if he was an old friend. Although Angel shared everything about her past, Collins had been awful quiet about his own. She always assumed that it was painful to him...so she never pushed.
Collins cleared his throat, "Yeah. In another life time." At first he didn't care what the package was. But now…he was getting as curious as Angel. "Open it up, baby."
Angel nodded licking her lips. She tore open the box and revealed a small note and a velvet box. "Here." She handed him the letter assuming it was personal.
Collins took it carefully and unfolded it. He watched Angel and saw distance in her eyes. It wasn't fair that he kept it from her…but he worked so hard to forget it. And he did forget…except on every August 8th. But she was more important to him than these memories. So he read the words out loud. He knew she wouldn't understand but he would explain…one day he would explain. "Tommy. I guess you ain't so much of a kid anymore…but that's how I still remember you. Bright eyed and bushy tailed. Then things changed didn't they? You did, I know. Who didn't who went…" Collins paused knowing Angel would see him completely naked for the first time, " who went to Vietnam. You killed a shitload more than me…and I saw you bury yourself into that book of Mitchell's more and more as you killed more and more. I don't know what I'm saying cause you know me…shit for brains."
"Hey shit for brains!" The sergeant called out, "Watch where your walkin. If I didn't know better I'd say you were piss drunk."
"Naw, Sarge." Tommy called back, "He's just gotta shit real bad." The green horns laughed nervously. They found themselves becoming Tommy's shadow and feeling very comfortable there. Not only would he tell them the truth, he also encouraged them. He'd tell them that their chances weren't all shit. After all he made it more than the two days predicted.
"Some buddy you are." Toad said struggling to catch up to him, "You had to say something like that? I beat the fuck out of you later."
"Tell me how does one beat a fuck out of another individual?" Tommy asked smirking, "The shit ok. Bowels and all of that fun liquidy shit but the fuck? How does one do that?"
It was their way of showing friendship. Throwing comments back and forth at each other that they would never say to an enemy.
"I'm gonna kick your philosohpucal ass!" Toad said laughing and pointing his finger at him. Then he fell. Right over his own two feet. He screamed out grabbing his ankle.
"You fuck!" The sergeant yelled running back to him, "Medic! If you broke your goddammed ankle I'm gonna-" Bullets flew into the sergeant's chest. Toad had given away their position.
Tommy hit the ground motioning for the green horns to do the same. They shot, they crawled, more fell. Vietcong and the good old boys. They all fell down. Just like Bishop had on their last run.
"Tommy!" Toad screamed grabbing his leg, "Tommy ,I gotta tell you somethin!"
Tommy swore under his breath and crawled to his friend, "What the hell do you have to tell me at a time like this? Couldn't it wait?"
"No." Toad said, "Cause if I die-"
"Toad, shut the fuck up, you're not gonna die, you twisted your goddamed ankle." Tommy pointed out, quite sick of the little chitchat he was having during a war.
"I know…I know but I wanted to tell you I don't care." Toad said with a deep breath.
Tommy rolled his eyes, "Well thank you very much, asshole, I don't care either."
Toad grabbed his uniform, "No. I mean…I know…I know what you are. And I didn't say anything…cause you're a good guy. I didn't know homos were actually good guys."
The bullets around them stopped flying. A green horn raised his head, "They've retreated. We won!"
Toad chuckled to himself, "Idiot greenhorns." He looked up at Tommy and smiled.
Tommy smiled back, "Thanks man." He whispered.
"Wait! Wait! There are more of them!" A green horn called out.
Tommy didn't catch the words in time. He stood up and received a bullet in his side. His body slammed down into the ground next to Toad. His friend wailed for a medic.
Collins smiled bitterly and continued on with the letter, "So I'm thinking about our days out of country and I couldn't in good conscience keep it. I know you didn't care…which was sweet of you. But it's yours. I fell over my own two feet. You were the one that got…shot."
Angel gasped covering her mouth. It was like she was listening to a story. A story of someone else's life. Not her Collins. Not him.
"I know you felt like you owed me somethin…for keeping who you are secret. Keeping you from getting kicked out. But it was my honor to fight along side you. And you deserve it. Yours…Toad." Collins reached out for the box and opened it to reveal a Purple Heart.
Angel leaned over and looked at it slowly, "How…I…I don't believe it."
"Can you believe it? We're finally coming home? Finally, on this lovely August 8th." Toad said to Tommy who was sitting next him. Toad had the Purple Heart that Tommy gave to him pinned to his uniform. "Course I'll miss shooting the hell out of the Cong but hell. I get to fuck my wife. I can't be too picky"
Tommy nodded rubbing his healing side, "You never were too picky Toad…" He glanced out of the window and then went back to studying the pages of Mitchell's books.
"Yes! Look at all of the people gathered to welcome us home, man!" Toad punched Collins' chest affectionately, "Fuck my wife! These ladies are just waiting for me. I can see it now a parade of women in short short skirts-"
"Shut it." Tommy said breathlessly, "Did you see…?" He pointed outside, "Those aren't horny women."
The airplane rolled to a stop and the flight attendants nodded to the veterans trying to ignore the shouts that were coming from outside. But Tommy couldn't ignore it.
"Baby killers! Rapists! Animals!" The crowd shouted holding up signs and pointing at the men with such hate.
Toad paled as they walked out. Not only did the crowd have words but now they had garbage. They threw cans, bottles, anything they could get their hands on. If the crowd caught the soldiers on another day they would have had a riot on their hands. But today they were all too shocked to fight back.
"Sarge said when we'd go home we'd be heroes." Toad whispered covering his face with his arm.
"Yeah…ain't it grand to be home?" Tommy mumbled back as the men ran into the airport for shelter.
"Baby…" Angel whispered putting her hand on his chest, "I don't…I don't understand. You're too young."
"I lied." Collins said quietly not able to take his eye off of the Purple Heart, "But it got me through college. Got me where I am today. I joined lots of those protests after the war. Burned my uniform at one. Then the screaming and pain died down…and mine didn't. So I moved away to New York…I got a job here. I didn't include what I did between high school and college. When I met the boys it didn't come up. It's like another life now."
Angel listened to him closely, "That's what the scar is isn't it? On your side?"
Collins nodded slowly, "Yeah." He glanced over at their small bookshelf. Mitchell's book was still among them. Collins never had the heart to burn that. The book that turned him on to his first love. Philosophy. He turned to his second and eternal love, tears in his eyes. The memories were just too much to handle. Mitchell's death, Bishop's death, the Sarge's death, the murder of hundred unknowns, the rape of villages, the horrible reaction from the people, and the all out abuse of human life by a government. It was too much…but it had made Collins into who he was. Tommy the killer became a pacifist. A scared little boy became a strong man. But one thing never changed, he was always protective of his friends.
Angel held him close and let him cry, knowing that he would explain. But not today.