He couldn't breathe.
He didn't know where he was.
He slowly woke up to find himself sinking in what appeared to be water.
He tried to swim back up only to find out that the whole room was full of water. It was like an aquarium with no opening.
He felt himself drowning slowly.
He couldn't regain consciousness.
His heart was pounding painfully.
And the last thing he heard was a scream made by bears, a child, a teenager, and an old man.
He passed out.
Chapter 1
Another Day
Going to the night market was more or less something Ice Bear enjoyed doing. Aside from the absence of the scorching sun, the cold wind can refresh his mind from the daily stress his family shouldered. It's not like they bothered him that much. But he loved his brothers so much that he couldn't help himself but help them carry the pain. Although, Ice Bear sometimes thought that they need to start opening up more or they might burst and change their personality drastically.
A certain memory then went into its mind. It acted like a caterpillar, for though small and only slithered slowly, it still got there.
Noticing this, the bear shook his head and sighed.
He needed to stop remembering it.
He knew it would be only a bother to him.
It was nothing but a nuisance to him anyway.
Besides, what could he do? Past is past. He couldn't do anything. He couldn't stop the man from trying to help him escape. He couldn't stop him from doing what he thought was best when it was not. He-
Stop.
He needed to stop.
Grabbing the bag that sat on the floor, he kept on walking.
Yes. That was right.
It was not right for him to think of that.
Besides, didn't his brothers need a new video game and doughnuts?
He nodded. That's what he needed to focus on at the moment.
He found a doughnut shop and went in.
It was another day. Another day that was as ordinary and plain as all the other days. Sure, there were moments in their lives when surprising events would come into the family's household. But once again, unfortunately, another ordinary day had to come.
"Can you pass me that strawberry doughnut?"
He heard the sound of his eldest brother, seemingly engrossed with the game he bought on that night. He saw his second eldest brother, grabbing the doughnut and passing it to the other. Like the eldest, the second one couldn't keep his eyes from being glued to the screen. Ice Bear could see how sweaty their paws were as the eldest did his best to win.
Laundry was done. So, he had time to relax in his own refrigerator.
Because his brothers would hog the television to themselves, he bought a separate one for himself a few months ago. On that day, he used it to watch that Russian channel he subscribed to.
There wasn't anything much in there except for news. But he only did it so Ice Bear can remember where he came from.
Ten minutes later, however, he shut the television off and laid back down.
Ice Bear's head was aching. Just like that night, it came, slithering into his brain as the events played.
He blinked before shaking his head.
He needed to stop.
Remembering would only hurt. And Ice Bear held so many scars. Possibly more than his own brothers.
Ice Bear got out of the refrigerator before stretching his arms.
He wanted to visit Chloe.
He got his hat and made his way to the door until a voice called out to him.
"Hey, little bro! Where are you going?"
He tried to hide his brothers expression in the most possible way he could. "Chloe."
Grizz bit his lip before nodding. "Just be back before sunset, alright?"
Ice Bear nodded before going out. But when he closed the door, he heard voices talking.
"You think something's wrong with our little brother?"
"I'm not sure. But I feel as if there is something bothering him."
He heard the sigh of his second eldest brother. "Why can't he just tell us what's wrong? We're his big brothers, after all. We need to know."
"Cheer up, Panpan. Knowing him, he's tough. He can handle himself."
"But one day, he's going to burst even more than us! Aren't you worried about him?"
"Of course I am. I really want to know as well but...I guess we have to wait until he's ready."
That struck an arrow in Ice Bear's heart. The guilty feeling spreaded around him like a disease.
Indeed, it was just an ordinary day for him. But just like any other day, he shook his head and made his way to Chloe's house.
"My parents won't be back until evening so it's great to have you here!"
Chloe sat down next to the bear before getting her cup and drinking the tea. Ice Bear also helped himself to some tea. Tea was another thing that helped him relax. But because his brothers didn't like the sight of tea, the only place where he could drink such was at Chloe's.
"Ice Bear is great to be here too."
Chloe smiled before clearing her throat. "Actually, there's something I want to talk to you about."
That made the bear curious. "Ice Bear is listening."
The girl looked down before setting down her cup of tea. "I-I talked to your brothers a while ago on my phone."
Ice Bear's eyes widened. Could it be about...?
"Is there something bothering you that makes you not want to talk to us about it?"
He knew it.
"Ice Bear has too many secrets. None bothers him."
Chloe studied his expression. "You're lying. There is something bothering you."
Ice Bear looked down. Indeed, he felt even more guilty.
Why couldn't he just bring himself to tell them about it?
But it wasn't their business, right? After all, who would care for a creature like him?
Why did they even want to know?
Just...why?
Chloe pat the bear's right arm. "Hey. You don't have to tell me about it if you're not ready."But she frowned. "But you have to tell us one day. You can't keep suffering like this."
Ice Bear nodded. "Ice Bear understands."
Chloe smiled a bit. "Go easy on yourself. Everything will be okay."
But he knew it wouldn't be okay. It will never be okay.
Even so, he forced a smile and nodded.
"Ice Bear knows."
Indeed, it was just another ordinary day for him.
The day ended with him going home from Chloe's house, the pang of guilt ever-growing once again.
And he knew it would end like usual. They would eat dinner, Grizz and Panda would probably stay up, watching a movie they rented from the DVD store, and Ice Bear would try to sleep, ignoring the glimpses of the past that came into him.
But unlike all ordinary days, he felt tired. So he sat on a bench and watched as the snowflakes fell one by one. Before making his way to Chloe's house, he bought a fish teriyaki with rice and condiments in the restaurant where he used to work. So when he sat, he started eating.
He hated himself.
Unlike all ordinary days, he was late. He needed to be back by sunset. But it was eight in the evening and there he was, eating while watching the snowflakes fall.
What would his brothers even do or say? He knew how overprotective they could get. They could probably be out, looking for him in the slowly-growing winter.
Ice Bear made a mental note to cook up something for him as apology for his tardiness.
But at this point, all he wanted to do was rest.
Just like any other day, the memories made him stressed.
The pain born in his heart grew even larger than yesterday.
Why did this have to happen to him?
Why couldn't the memories just stop?
Shouldn't he feel happy that he has his brothers?
But why did he feel as if he weren't contented with that?
Why did he feel homesick?
He wanted to go home. Not to the cave but to that white land again.
How was it doing, he wondered.
Or rather, how was he doing?
Ice Bear shook his head. Somehow, he did not have an appetite anymore. He wanted to throw his food out. But a voice screaming in Russian in his brain prevented him from doing so.
He decided to put it in his fridge, and then reheat it so he wouldn't have to cook his own breakfast.
Ice Bear stood up and walked towards home, all alone. Even with a few changes, it still didn't change the fact that that day was just as plain and similar with the rest.
And it still did not change the fact that the guilty feeling didn't disappear.
What felt strange to him, first and foremost, was that his brothers weren't home. He checked everywhere from the living room to their bedrooms and there was still no sign of them.
He felt panic rushing into his veins. But he relaxed himself and thought that they were probably still looking for him.
Ice Bear sighed. He needed to start preparing for their meals.
But when he opened the fridge door, the first thing he saw was a note taped to the side. Maybe his brothers left a note?
When Ice Bear got it, however, his speculation was wrong.
He felt himself shaking and his heart pounding.
He, therefore, concluded that that day wasn't like those ordinary ones.
Missed me, bear? It's me again. The guy who stole your vacuum cleaner.
Originally, we were supposed to kidnap you. But we have noticed your fighting skills and I must say that I am impressed. It's just, however, unfortunate that we have to use your older brothers for this operation. But it would be worth it.
Come to our headquarters if you want your brothers back.
-Barry