This is probably blasphemous, but I'm sure God knows it's just for fun. Anyways, the original idea is not mine, it's one of my friends, and the Edward Our Father is completely and totally hers. Jacob's, Alice's, Stephenie Meyer's, and Bella's are mine. Enjoy!
Our Edward,Who art in Forks,
Hallowed be thy sparkles.
Thy Volvo comes, thy will be fast,
Our Earth as it is in the meadow.
Give you this day, our daily blood;
Forgive us our heartbeats,
As we worship Carlisle for giving you life.
Lead us into temptation,
Deliver us to you.
For thine is the vampire,
The music and the hotness,
Forever and ever.
A-Edward
Our Jacob,
Who art in La Push,
Hallowed be thy fur.
Thy Volkswagen comes, thy will be angry,
And phase here as it is everywhere.
Give you this cliff, our daily jumping,
Forgive us our trespassings,
As we worship Sam for being Pack leader.
Resist the temptation to rip off our heads,
Deliver us unto you,
For thine art the werewolf,
The car-fixer and the sexiness
For ever and ever,
A-wolf.
Our Alice,
Who art in The Mall,
Hallowed be thy credit card.
Thy Porsche comes, thy will grand auto theft,
In the US as it is in Volterra.
Give you this day, your daily shopping,
Forgive us of our fashion,
As we worship clothes and buying.
Tempt us into purchasing,
Delivering, packaging, and shipping.
For thine art the shop-a-holic,
The addicted and the uncurable,
Forever and ever,
A-vampire.
Our Bella,
Who art in Forks,
Hallowed be thy clumsiness.
Thy slow truck comes, thy will invariably trip,
And fall as it is everywhere.
Give you this smell, your daily blood,
Forgive Edward of his protectiveness,
As he prevents you from having a life,
And tempt him daily with body and blood.
Deliver Edward from suicidal tendencies that get you almost killed,
For thine art the angel and stars for Edward,
The sweet, clumsy, naive, forgiving,
Forever and ever,
A-Bella
Our Stephenie Meyer,
Who art in Phoenix,
Hallowed be thy writings.
Thy will be done, thy Breaking Dawn comes,
On August the second, as it is everywhere.
Give you this praise, our daily money,
Forgive our rabid fangirl(and boy)ness,
As we worship and wish we could at least meet you.
Tempt us with maybe more Twilights,
Deliver us from our torment of waiting,
For thine art the author,
The creator and the maker,
Forever and ever,
A-Twilight
Yeah, I highly doubt Alice likes shopping that much, and some will disagree with Jacob's sexiness, and all that, but, hey, it's impossible to please everyone, right?
nsisdazl