A/N: This is a human AU. It will contain lots of angst, hurt/comfort, romance, and may fall into adult themes.
Chapter 1
"See you tomorrow, Kaito!" The director of the current music video he was starring in says, smiling and waving.
"Right!" Kaito chirps, smiling brightly and turning around, grabbing his bag and heading out of the studio.
The smile fell.
He didn't want to be back there. Not tomorrow, not ever. He was a joke to everyone; no one ever took him seriously, or gave him credit, or figured there was more to him than that fake, always smiling nice guy.
He didn't want to be that guy anymore.
He should've been happy. He was singing a "collab" with Hatsune Miku in the song "Cendrillon", and he was going to be able to interact with her.
That alone is huge. Hatsune Miku is the most famous singer in the country, and Kaito is just another singer who is beginning to be recognized.
It didn't help that he idolized and admired her to a great extent. When he started his music career, he looked up to her as a role model.
She was so gorgeous. Her voice was amazing, she could reach whatever note she wanted to, sing any kind of song. She portrayed herself so perfectly; her smile was so bright and breath-taking and she had eyes one could see the sun through.
He wanted to be like her.
But there were a lot of reasons why he couldn't.
His voice, for one. He would never be able to reach notes as high as she could. His voice was just too low. It was way too low, he thought, it was only suitable to a specific sort of songs, which he didn't think he would get far in his career.
His appearance. He was so scrawny. He still had pimples popping out all over his face, that he covered with make up each day. He really needed glasses, he was practically blind without them, but he thought he looked too weak and nerdy wearing them. So he wore contacts each day. They were uncomfortable.
His personality. Lots of people had met Miku before, and they all said the same thing: she was a sweetheart. She could be a little sassy sometimes, or get annoyed, but overall she was such a kind person. He wasn't. Or rather, he didn't find himself to be.
He thought himself to be selfish, inconsiderate, and repulsive. So he created a fake person. He made himself smile no matter what, be kind, alluring; the kind of unflawed nice guy people wanted to see.
And yet, not matter how hard he tried people still treated him like a joke. Especially when they wanted him to star in music videos.
He was always being harassed in music videos. "For the sake of the song" "It's just playing a character" they said, they always said that. It didn't change the fact that it made him feel inferior.
There were many examples.
He had written a response to Hatsune Miku's "World is Mine", and sent it to her in the hopes she would acknowledge his skills and want to get to know him. It was a dumb idea. She had shown the song lyrics to her manager, when it was supposed to be a private love letter.
When he was asked to sing the song and star in a music video with her, he was very excited and overjoyed. Maybe they could become friends; maybe she could teach him a thing or two about singing or fame.
It didn't turn out anything like that.
He was projected as a lovesick, unwanted fool. His drawing was ripped to shreds by her "for the sake of the video". His pudding he had made for her was spilled all over his face.
He was punched in the face by a flustered, blushing Miku.
Of course, she didn't actually punch him, but it sure felt like a punch to his heart.
After the music video, however, she had apologized for how she had to act in the video and hoped to become friends.
It made him feel bad on how he was angry about the way he was treated in the video. It was just for money and views, anyway.
He figured their friendship meant nothing to her.
He was tired of being a joke; he wanted to be taken seriously.
No one tried to get to know him behind that smiling facade, no one seemed to care. They only cared about money, and views, and popularity, and that wasn't the reason Kaito had started his music career.
He had wanted to share his music, and make people smile when they listened. He had wanted to encourage others to pursue their career no matter their voice style. Most of all, he wanted to help people get through hard times. When he was depressed, even now, he would use music to drown out reality and escape, if only for a little while.
And yet, no one cared.
It made him so angry. For the most part, it made him sad.
Clash!
Kaito found himself beginning to fall to the floor after bumping harshly into someone. He closes his eyes and prepares for impact. However, someone grabs his arm and pulls him up before he falls.
He opens his eyes slowly, and finds himself facing a man. The man was a few years older than him, by appearance. His long purple hair was tied into a high pony tail, and he looked a bit agitated as he glared with his blue eyes.
"You should watch where you're going." He says.
Kaito stares at the handsome man, and when he realizes he had been gawking at him, he quickly averts his eyes.
"S-Sorry." He apologizes, bowing. "I wasn't paying attention, and I..."
The man interrupts him. "It's pretty late. What's a kid like you doing out here?"
"I'm not a kid... I'm nearly twenty, you know!" Kaito retaliates, annoyed. "It's no surprise you don't know what I'm doing, anyway."
He didn't expect someone to know who he was. A popular singer? Right. He wasn't very popular, and he found his singing to be pretty damn bad.
"I know who you are." The man says. "Kaito, was it?"
Kaito's heart skips a beat, and he stares at the man, "Y-You know who I am?"
"No, a guess." The man says sarcastically, shaking his head. "Idiot."
He walks off.
Kaito stares down at his feet, feeling his eyes begin to water. His day had already been pretty bad, he didn't need another trigger for his tears.
He sniffles softly, holding back his tears and beginning to solemnly walk off to his own apartment. Always crying, always weak.
The man turns around, having heard the soft sniffles coming from the blue-haired boy. He narrows his eyes, wondering if he had just imagined it.
It wasn't too hard to believe, however. He knew that the semi-famous singer Kaito wasn't all fun and smiles as he was always portrayed. He figured perhaps he wasn't just the funny, nice guy he was in music videos.
Yet in all honesty, he didn't really care about some pathetic man's life. He had his own music career to worry about, and anyone who has the potential to get in the way would be pushed away.
It's not like he was heartless. He wasn't. He did feel guilty for calling a man with issues something so mean. He was having a very bad day after receiving some especially terrible news, and found himself taking his anger out on others; to be honest, he was disgusted at himself.
The blue-haired man would get over it; after all, they were just words.
He tried to tell himself that, and yet the guilt in his heart grew by the second. He sighs, and turns around.
"Look—"
Kaito was walking off into the road, not looking around to make sure if there was any cars heading towards him. There was.
The man's eyes widen, and quickly he runs over there. He grabs Kaito's arm and pulls him back, catching him by his back before he fell.
Kaito had probably just evaded near death.
The car drove past them at amazing speed, the passenger in the car yelling, "Watch where you're walking, idiot!"
From the quick speed the car drove, the man was not able to see who the person was.
Insults. Another one. That was all Kaito ever seemed to receive.
He gets out of the man's tight embrace, a bit embarrassed, grabbing his bag and beginning to walk away. "You didn't have to do that."
The man narrows his eyes. "You should be grateful. You could've died."
Kaito turns around, eyes locked on his shoes. He mumbles, "So what?"
The man doesn't answer, instead he puts his hands in his pockets and walks away. Whatever problems Kaito was dealing with wasn't his concern, nor was it his business.
Finally, Kaito was left alone in the street.
He sighs, and crosses the street, heading to his apartment.
Once he removes all his makeup, contacts and clothes to take a shower, he stares at his reflection in the mirror. There were large eye bags under his eyes, and various pimples scattered across his face.
He tears his gaze away from his reflection and heads into the shower.
After changing into his pajamas, he lays down on his bed. The clock read 11:03 PM.
He set his alarm for 4 AM.
After silencing his loud, jumbled mind, he forced himself to fall into a deep, dream-filled dream.