This story originally belonged to WanderingTeen, but for personal reasons she is no longer able to continue it. So she has entrusted it to me. What would happen if the characters of POTO had answering machines? What kind of messages would they have? Well, this is where to find out!
1. Erik's Answering Machine
Erik muttered an oath under his breath as he stormed down into his lair. As he did so, his answering machine (A/N: How did he get an answering machine? I have no idea. But that's the magic of a phanphic. So ha) caught his eye. It was blinking its infuriating red light at him, indicating that he had new messages.
Growling, Erik pressed the play button.
Beep!
Instantly, a strange female voice filled his home.
"Hello! Do you know who this is?"
No, he did not. And he didn't give a damn who it was, either.
"I'm your biggest… phan…"insane giggling filled the room,"And I think you're the sexiest beast who ever walked the earth…"
Well, Erik had to admit, that was uplifting, considering he had been having a bad day.
"…And I want you. Badly."
Though that definitely put a damper on it.
"And you and I can sing to each other all the time!" the voice began to sing in a horrible voice. "Those who have seen your voice, draw back in fear. I am the mask you wear–"
Beep!
Erik quickly deleted the message and sighed in relief. Whoever the Hell that was, they wouldn't be bothering him anymore.
But, a new message began, and the voice belonged to that same girl.
Beep!
"Hello again! It's me!" more giggling. "That twitchy little answering machine cut me off. And I know how… disappointed you would have been if I didn't continue my message…"
Beep!
Quite the contrary, Erik would have loved if the stupid machine cut the stupid "phan" off. He quickly deleted this message.
The next message on the machine had a man's voice…
Beep!
"HOW DARE YOU IMPERSONATE ME? Just you wait until I get my hands on more gunpowder… or a lasso… or a lasso covered in gunpowder that I could strangle you with and then blow up afterwards!"
Well, that was frightening… slightly…
"So, I give you a choice. Either you will stop impersonating me and I will spare your life, or, you continue to impersonate me and you shall suffer the consequences! You will find that there is a box beside your answering machine–" as Erik looked, the box was indeed there, "containing a brass grasshopper and a brass scorpion."
Erik opened the box and, inside the bow, there were the two brass figurines. His hand shot out to pick one of them up when the voice on the machine continued.
"Now, one of these items will answer for you. If you turn the scorpion, you are saying that you will not impersonate me anymore. But, if you turn the grasshopper, you are indicating that you will continue to impersonate me."
Really, who was this man to threaten the great Phantom of the Opera? He reached out to turn the grasshopper when the voice warned him,
"The grasshopper! Be careful of the grasshopper! A grasshopper does not only turn: it hops! It hops! And it hops jolly high!"
Something in his words made Erik pause. The message ended and another one began.
Beep!
"Hello again!"
Dear God! It was that strange female again!
"I bet you're wondering who I am. Well, just look into your bedroom and… you'll see me!"
Beep!
At the sound of that, a high pitched giggling filled the room. It was coming from… his bedroom!
Well, Erik had had quite enough of this madness. So, he did what any sane man would do: He quickly turned the scorpion and fled.