Do You Mind? Chapter 1
A/N An important mission for the dragon-riders gets complicated when they are suddenly able to hear their dragons' thoughts, and vice-versa. The word "chaos" doesn't begin to describe what happens next. Rated T for adult themes; the language is all K. Some Ruffcup, just because I haven't done any Ruffcup yet.
I used text attributes to make the many kinds of mind communication clear. "A human's thoughts look like this," while "A dragon's thoughts look like this." In the quadruple case of Ruffnut and Tuffnut and Barf and Belch, the above text formats refer to Ruff and her head, Barf; "Tuffnut's thoughts look like this" and "Belch's thoughts look like this." It'll make more sense when you read it in context.
This story was inspired by Anne McCaffrey's "Dragonriders of Pern" novels, which envision a world where dragons and their riders can communicate mentally. If you love dragons and haven't read the Pern novels, you should; but I think Ms. McCaffrey was an optimist when it came to how dragons and people might "talk" to each other.
o
"Here's the sword and the dagger, as promised." Hiccup had made sure to do excellent work on these blades when he made them, even though they were strictly decorative.
"And here's your case of Nadder Polish, as promised," Trader Johann nodded. He took the blades and gave Hiccup a wooden box. Hiccup lifted the lid.
"Six bottles. Good. It's always a pleasure doing business with you, Johann." Hiccup laboriously carried his box off Johann's ship and up to the village's ground level. These glass bottles of bluish liquid would make a Nadder's scales shine like a mirror, which would make the Nadders ecstatically happy. The Nadder riders who had to do all that polishing... not so much. But there were times when any dragon rider wanted his dragon to look his best, and some of those riders would willingly put in the effort on those special times. He knew of five Nadder riders in Berk who fell into that category, and Astrid was one of them.
Those riders met him in the training ring, braving the pouring rain to get their precious polish. Each had made a separate deal with Hiccup; Astrid, for example, had given him a silver necklace to provide the silver for the inlays on the sword and dagger he'd forged. "I never wear that girly stuff anyway," she'd commented, "and I know this polish is exactly what Stormfly wants." He passed out the five bottles, then took a look at the sixth one.
"Astrid, can I see your bottle?" he asked. He compared the two. "This one is a different color. I wonder if Johann gave me the wrong stuff by mistake?"
He looked at the bottle's label. "Psi Enhancer, Range Nominal? PERN, for short? What in the Nine Worlds does that mean?"
"If anyone would know, I bet Gothi would know," Fishlegs suggested. "Let's take it to her and find out."
"Here, let me see it," Snotlout demanded. He grabbed the bottle, but the rain made it slippery and it popped out of his hand, hit the stone floor of the ring, and shattered.
"That was brilliant, Snotlout!" Astrid raged. "I was going to save up to buy that last bottle! Now it's gone forever!"
"Hey, accidents happen," he shrugged as he walked away. "You should be like me – I ride a dragon that doesn't need to be polished!"
The clear liquid from the shattered bottle mixed with the rain water on the training-ring floor. All six of the riders managed to step in that particular puddle as they prepared for their morning flight, but none of them thought anything of it.
Hiccup watched the other riders prepare for take-off. He didn't love riding in the rain. His dragon was the fastest, which meant he got pelted with raindrops the hardest. If Astrid and Stormfly felt like racing, they'd go all-out, and he'd be totally soaked before they got home. "Couldn't a dragon take a one-day break from flying?" he wondered.
"That would be like asking you to stop eating for a day."
Hiccup froze. "Where did that thought come from?"
"From me, of course. But I did not invite you into my mind. Please get out."
Hiccup looked around frantically. He realized that Toothless was craning his neck to look back at him. He thought he knew all the faces a Night Fury could make, but this was a new one.
"Toothless, are you saying stuff in my mind?" he said out loud. He got no response.
"Toothless, can you hear my thoughts?"
"Yes. Please stop intruding on my thoughts. It's rude."
All the other riders were saying something similar to no one in particular. Their dragons were staring at them with expressions of bafflement very much like Toothless' expression.
"Guys!" he shouted. "My dragon is talking to me in my head! There's something really strange going on here!"
"You're telling me?!" Ruffnut shouted. "My dragon just told me to quit blaming him when his other head messes up!"
"My dragon just told me to quit yanking on his horns so hard!" Tuff chimed in.
"My dragon just told me I don't feed him enough!" Snotlout added; he looked a bit pale.
"My dragon just told me that my outfit clashes with the color of her scales!" Astrid said with some irritation.
They all looked at Fishlegs.
"Meatlug says she loves me, but she wishes I'd stop kissing her in front of everybody," he said defensively. "She says it's embarrassing."
The riders quickly dismounted and formed a circle. Somehow, turning their backs on their dragons seemed like a good move. It made them feel more secure in the face of the unknown.
"What happened?" Tuff didn't like it when his world changed. He sounded almost scared.
"Guys, I don't know what happened," Hiccup began. "Somehow, our dragons can hear what we're thinking, and we can hear what they're thinking. I haven't heard any dragons except Toothless, so I guess it only works if you're touching your own dragon."
Astrid gazed at Stormfly for a moment. "She can't hear what I'm thinking. You're probably right."
"So what if he's right?" Tuff complained. "My dragon is talking to me in my head! If I try to answer him, he corrects me – who knew Belch was a grammar Nazi? How are we supposed to live like this?"
"It's really strange," Hiccup nodded, "but it's not the end of the world, okay? Maybe it's even a good thing. We've always wondered how smart dragons are. Now we can find out."
"Yes," nodded Astrid, "but do we want the dragons to find out how smart some of us are?" She shot Snotlout a look.
"I think they already have a pretty good idea about that," Fishlegs said.
"Anyway," Hiccup went on, "I think they can hear us and understand us when we think at them, but not when we talk. So as long as we talk and don't think at them, nothing will be different."
"I can handle not thinking," Tuff nodded.
"Like Hiccup said, nothing will be different," his sister sneered.
"We don't know if this is a permanent change, or if it's something that's going to wear off," Hiccup continued. "If your dragon doesn't want your thoughts, respect him, just like if someone told you they didn't want to talk to you. Things are going to be a little weird around here for a while, but we should be used to that by now. Okay, let's try again on going for a ride. Nothing fancy – we'll just go all the way around Berk and land back here, okay? Let's do this."
As they rejoined their dragons, Hiccup paused for a moment to watch Astrid as she ran to Stormfly. She moved smoothly and gracefully, with no wasted motions, and was a pleasure to watch... especially from behind her.
"Oh, for Tannin's sake, Hiccup, would you please quit filling my head with those distracting mental images? If you want to mate with the female that badly, just do it!"
"Just do it? Do you think it's that simple, Toothless?"
"Of course it's that simple! You approach the female, you tell her she pleases you and you'd like to mate with her. If she's willing, it's your lucky day. If she isn't, go find another one who looks just like her. It's not like they're all unique."
"Actually, they are, Toothless. And we can't 'just do it' that way. Our parents have to arrange the match, we have to negotiate for the bride-price and the dowry and the morning-gift, we need a time of engagement, I have to build a house for us, we need a wedding with swords and rings and a sacrifice and –"
Toothless snorted mentally. "You humans make the simplest things so complicated! All that nonsense over a simple biological function... I can't understand how there are so many of you. In any case, could you please stop thinking about it so much? It's very distracting."
"Yeah, well, she distracts me too, bud. I can't help it. That's how it is, being a boy my age."
"Then I hope you grow into a boy of some other age, and quickly. Every time you see that female, all you think about is mating and nesting. You always seemed so clever on the outside; I never imagined your thoughts would be so monotonous."
o
Astrid bounded onto her dragon's back.
"Let's go, Stormfly! Maybe today is the day we can fly faster than Hiccup and Toothless!"
"I bet I could fly faster if you would polish my scales for me. I'd look so pretty! Do you think I'm pretty, Astrid?"
"Of course I do, Stormfly! But you're a big dragon! Do you know how long it takes me to polish all your scales? We can do that only on special occasions."
"Hiccup thinks you're pretty. I think he'd polish your scales, if you had any."
"How do you know that?"
"Every time he's behind you when you walk, his eyes get really big and he stares at you. He must really like your hair."
"What? That pig! I'll kill him!"
"I wish your eyes got that big when you looked at me. Do you really think I'm pretty?"
"Yes... yes, Stormfly, I think you're pretty. Your shade of blue is prettier than the blue of the bruises I'm going to raise on Hiccup's arms, and your fire is just a little hotter than my anger right now! Now let's go flying before I find out what Snotlout does when I walk!"
"Oh, him? He stares at you, too, and he makes this foolish expression, like –"
"Enough, Stormfly! Just fly!"
o
Hookfang turned to look at Snotlout as the boy got seated on his dragon's neck.
"Snotlout, I'm glad we learned to understand each other. It's good for learning. I never knew humans were cannibals."
"Cannibals? You mean... people eating people? We don't do that!"
"But I keep seeing your mind-pictures of you and that female with your mouths touching. Obviously, one of you is trying to consume the other. Why else would you do such a thing?"
"Uhhh... it's too complicated to explain. Can we just go flying?"
"It must be very important, because you think about it so much. Please explain it to me?"
"All I can say is, it feels good."
"It does? That's hard to imagine. If dragons did that, it would be some kind of an attack. How many times have you done this?"
"Uhhh... never, if you must know."
"Then how do you know it feels good?"
"Would you quit asking so many questions? You sound like Fishlegs!"
"One more insult like that, and I'll buck you off. I'm just curious, that's all."
"Look, it's something that people don't talk about, okay?"
"But you spend a lot of time thinking about it. If I don't ask, I'll never – Squirrel!"
o
"Let's go, Meatlug! We aren't racing today, so we can take it easy."
"That's good, because I need to rest."
"How can you need to rest when you've been asleep all night?"
"The night is for sleeping. The day is for resting. Everybody knows that." The Gronckle yawned hugely.
"Well... maybe you can rest when we finish this flight, okay? Please, Meatlug? Be a good girl and fly for me?"
"That's another thing. Why did you used to think I was a boy? Surely you can tell the difference?"
"Actually, I can't, and don't call me Shirley. It's not so easy to tell with dragons."
"I can tell the difference just fine. Wouldn't it bother you if I called you a girl... Shirley?"
"Hey! That wasn't nice!"
"Then you be nice to me, and let me take a nap. Okay? We'll fly together later."
"Meatlug, we're supposed to fly now! You can rest later, and I'll... Meatlug?" The dragon was snoring.
"Hiccup! We're having an energy shortage over here!"
o
"Hey, Barf! Can you hear me?" Ruff was grinning hugely.
"Perfectly! You don't have to shout!"
"Awesome! I can talk to my dragon now! We can make crazy plans and no one else can hear us!"
"Hey, who is that?"
"Tuff? Is that you?"
"Who did you think it was? Gobber the Belch?"
"Yeah? Did somebody want me?"
"Who was that?"
"It's me, Belch! Somebody called me."
"No, that was your rider being upid-stay. He wasn't calling you."
"Hey, who are you calling upid-stay?"
"Wait... so me, my brother, and both our dragon heads can all hear each other at once?"
"Great, just great. Just when I'm finally working things out with my other head, now I've got two more heads I have to deal with!"
"Do what I do, Belch. Just ignore them."
"You try ignoring them when they're yanking your horns off your head!"
"Well, how else am I supposed to get your attention?"
"Maybe this won't be as awesome as I thought."
o
"Okay, whatever this is, I'm hoping it wears off, real soon," Hiccup said out loud. "Real soon!"