1. Birth of a Monster
Why was I born?
When
my mother looked at me as a baby, she showed fear and sorrow. I
looked very terrible. I do not just look terrible. I seemed like
quite the monster.
My nose is not the same
as others. The middle of my face is dented like a hole. That was my
nose. And my eyes are small and yellow. My body, with a thin skin,
looks like a skeleton
But my heart was that
of a normal child. At least, it is too early to be called a monster.
I had no chance to kiss
my mother. My mother disliked looking at me, even when I wear a mask
attached to my face. My father also avoided looking at my face.
Did I ever have a name?
I could not remember. What I could remember was my mother pouring
words of denunciation and my father beating me many times with a
belt.
I tried to escape from
my house as soon as I was able to, using the things around me. I was
born and bred in France, in a small town.
If I escaped, there is
a small possibility I could not, what should I do? I will hide while
it is bright, when it is night, I will start walking. If I do that,
no one will see me.
In the darkness, I will
often sing songs alone. Unlike my body, my voice was splendid and
beautiful. My perfectly clear singing swings in the night air,
resounding like the clanging of a bell.
People who hear my song
will dismiss it as the sound of the wind.
"That lovely voice,
where can I hear it from?"
"Is it not quite like
the voice of an angel?"
I shouted, facing
towards the darkness.
"Well, is that a
splendid song or what!"
"Come out! Show your
form!"
Show my form? This
skeleton-like body? My mask is attached to my skull.
No matter what, I will
not come out of the darkness. When I get hungry, I search for food in
the garbage bin. I remembered that there's money in people's
pockets.
One evening, I saw a
tent shed in the distance. I saw many things in the shed, unusual
things, like magic tricks equipment I saw, and money. Using the lamp,
I see people happily moving to the tent.
I, wearing a mask, got
nearer to the tent. A man at the entrance shouted.
"Enter! Come and see!
A bearded woman! A three-eyed man! Many unusual things to be seen!"
Is it true?
"See it for yourself!
A woman who has scales on her body! The fattest man in the world!"
I lined up in the queue
and bought a ticket. I rubbed my eyes in the mask. I could not
believe my eyes.
First, the bearded
woman! Next, a man with a strange bruise. Then, the three-eyed man is
visible. The fattest man in the world. The woman with scales on her
body is also there. Everyone was changed terribly.
Strange, terrible…
So. Similar to me.
I whispered to the
fattest man in the world.
"Uh, I would also
like to live in this shed."
The man answered
suspiciously.
"Here, there is not
room for children. Return to your house, to your mother, sweetly."
"I have no home. I do
not remember my mother's face."
I peeled off my mask.
When the fat man looked my face, he nodded.
"I understand. You
may be here."
The man brought me to
the director. The director looked at my skeleton-like body and my
face.
"Think if you can
function here. That is a good thought."
The next evening, I
entered the freak show shed. I became a freak show myself.
"Ah, come and see!
The scariest face in the world, born a skeleton!"
That was me.
At night, seeing my
face, was very popular for the people.
My yellow eyes shine in
the darkness. I removed my mask.
The people screamed in
fear. They escaped from the tent. Although this happened, the next
evening, many people bought tickets to come to see me. With my
favour, the freak show tent was a craze.
From the first time since I was born, I was able to feel calm. In this shed, there were many people similar to me. Although I am living as a skeleton, there was no other more suitable place.