It was three days before Valentine's Day and the school was starting its annual flower gram event - a table set up outside the cafeteria where you could pay two dollars to have a carnation sent anonymously to whoever you wanted. Most boys sent them to their girlfriends and most girls sent them to their best friends. It was a weird tradition if you asked Maya.
She set her things down on the long table that the five of them always shared and almost immediately her annoyance was noticed. She hadn't known that the scowl had traveled from her head to her face. She thought she'd been getting better at controlling that kind of stuff.
"What's got you down," Zay asked as he unpacked his brown paper bag, earning himself a pointed look from Riley.
"Nothing's wrong I just hate Valentine's Day and think that sending carnations to people is a barbaric way to make less popular people feel badly about themselves. What's the point of giving people like Missy one more opportunity to rub it in everyone's face how popular and loved she is?" Maya shrugged a shoulder and reached for a fry off of Farkle's tray as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.
"It really kind of is a mean thing to do when you think about it," Lucas agreed to everyone's surprise. He was a go with the flow type of guy and to find fault in something so unimportant was unlike him. It caught even Maya off guard.
"I don't really know why you care. It isn't like you never get any." Riley was right. Maya had never been one to not receive any.
"Yeah, I get two every year. One from you and one from Farkle. It's been this way since kindergarten. A basket full of valentines from people who are obligated to give you a valentine if they give one to someone they actually want to."
It wasn't hard to see that maya was just a little bitter. She'd never gotten a meaningful Valentine's Day anything. not a stuffed animal holding a heart, not a box of chocolates, not a dozen red roses, not a satin jewelry box and certainly not a grand gesture of any kind. She'd been single her entire life even though she wore the mask of a boy crazy normal teenager. Even at sixteen she'd only kissed boys at parties during truth or dare and seven minutes in heaven. She'd certainly never had someone interested enough to buy her valentines.
"You've never had a valentine?" Lucas had been around since seventh grade but it hadn't really occurred to him that Maya had never actually been involved with anyone. He'd always just sort of assumed that it was something she kept private like so many other things in her life. He realized now, thanks to the swift kick in the shin he got from, well it could have been any of the others, that he was wrong.
It put an idea in his head.
It was Valentine's Day and Lucas was almost worried that Maya would just not show up. He waited down the hall from her locker nonchalantly and had a small internal celebration when he finally saw her turn the corner into the hallway. There was a frown on her face and he had to admit he'd expected that.
He watched as her features turned from annoyed to surprised to confused as she opened her locker and took out a small envelope. She opened it and read it, furrowing her brow as she turned it over a few times.
There was a valentine like you would give out in first grade. It was Winnie the Pooh and it wasn't signed. it really could have been from anybody. someone could have just been shoving one into every locker, but as she looked around she wasn't seeing anyone else discover a note as they opened theirs. She placed it in her back pocket and collected her things as if nothing happened. Lucas could still see the faint smile on her face as she turned and started off toward her home room. Another note promptly found its way in once she was out of sight.
All throughout the day flowers were being handed out at random. It made the day seem a little more special to not just get them all at once and then move on. Every time someone came in to make a delivery it seemed like Maya was getting at least one more flower. By the time Lucas saw her at lunch she had nine. He smiled when he saw how confused she looked as Riley asked about them while walking toward the table.
"I honestly have no idea. I thought they were from you but I'm getting these weird valentines too. Every time I open my locker there's another one. They're all written in different handwriting," thanks to Lucas enlisting the help of some of the more sentimental girls in the popular clique he was loosely affiliated with, "and they're all different too. First it was Winnie the Pooh and then it was power rangers. I think I even have a Pokemon one in here. It's the weirdest thing."
Lucas could tell by the look on her face as she talked about it that she was enjoying it. She did clam up though when Riley asked to see the cards.
"I don't have them," she lied. Lucas had watched her put every one in her pocket, and when that stack got too big into her sketchbook that was always with her. They said some personal things though so he understood why she wouldn't want to share. He liked that they were between them, not that Maya had any idea who he was in that sense.
The cards all said something along the lines of
You look beautiful today
I like when you wear your hair like that
I spent all last period thinking about you
It's nice to see you smile this much
I promise I'm not a stalker
I've wanted to do this for years
and
You make me smile all the time
"Sounds like some sad sap has too much time on his hands," he joked as he reached for one of the flowers. He hadn't gotten any, obviously not that he'd expected to, so he was studying it to make sure nobody had attached his name when he placed the order.
"It sounds like some sad sap is head over heels," Riley corrected. He chuckled at the words. They weren't wrong.
When Riley asked who Maya wanted it to be he felt that stupid surge of electricity in his stomach that most girls would call butterflies and he kept quiet but he noticed when her eyes flickered to him and away fast enough that it almost hadn't happened at all. He hoped it meant what he thought it meant.
The rest of the day continued in the same fashion. There were only three periods left before the end of the school day when he planned on revealing himself to her in private. He was terrified about it so when the final bell let out and people started trickling out of the school he gave himself a pep talk, and then another, and then another.
His last Valentine had told her to stick around until the hallway cleared and she did, telling Riley to go on without her and that she wanted a private moment with whoever this was who had made her day so sickeningly special.
He saw her smile falter as he walked over toward her, another envelope in his hand. It nearly stopped him in his tracks. He'd readied himself for her to not feel the same, but he hadn't readied himself for that immediate reaction of disappointment.
"That wasn't funny. I thought this was serious," she began, gesturing to her locker and the pile of notes and flowers. "I thought...I don't know why I got my hopes up. Of course it was a joke."
He was confused and he reached out to grab her arm immediately as she shut her locker and made to storm off. "Hey," he let our forcefully to get her attention. He softened drastically when she looked at him with eyes watering, which he could see her trying to blink away. "I don't know what you're talking about but this wasn't a joke, Maya. I wouldn't do that to you. Yeah, it started because of what you said but it wasn't just a friendly gesture. It was just the first time I felt ready to say something. Giving you that day you never got was just the push I needed," he promised her softly.
Her eyes were unsure as they searched his. He didn't know what she was looking for but if it was sincerity then she was surely going to find it. Keeping his gaze focused on hers made it easy for him to pinpoint the exact moment that she believed him. The smile that followed the realization was magical if you asked him. Her smile always was though.
He handed her the last envelope and she opened it nervously. It was a drawing she'd done of herself years ago and she hadn't realized he had it. She looked sad. She remembered drawing it and she remembered leaving it behind on some random table because the assignment had been a self portrait but this one wasn't one she could hand in to someone in a position of power. She couldn't let them know how sad and lonely she really was.
He'd colored parts of it though and added some details- flowers on the counter, stuff like that- and on the back he'd written in his own handwriting, "This is the most beautiful I've ever seen you. Full of so much sadness and blind to the fact that you're constantly on the edge of amazing. Let yourself tip because the way you erupt into stars when you fall off that edge is going to shake the entire world."