This is a What If? Story. What if the car had hit Enjouji? I was inspired one night, so I wrote it...I did the same thing with Your Point of View, didn't I? Must be a Kizuna thing...Enjoy!

Love, Tears, & Promises
An AU Kizuna Fanfic

Enjouji's face was paler than Ran had ever seen it. "He's shown no signs of waking up." The nurse in charge of the section had told him. Ran had nodded, and went on to the room.

He didn't even glance around as he took Enjouji's hand and kissed his lips gently. There was a time he'd have glanced around nervously, completely embarrassed at the thought of some stranger seeing him kiss his lover. That had all changed the day of the accident.

If only he hadn't let himself be stopped by their friends for that short time. If he'd only been a little closer...If Enjouji had only stopped to talk too, or waited for him at the curb...If only, if only, if only. There were a thousand if onlys. A thousand way the accident could have been different. Maybe if they'd been quicker or slower walking they could have avoided it altogether...

Ran sighed. It was past time to stop going over everything that could have changed the past. What had happened, had happened. Now he had to deal with the consequences. He looked at Enjouji's pale face, and his grip on his hand tightened. What if one of those consequences was Enjouji never waking up? He couldn't bear that. He shook his head. No, Enjouji was going to wake. He was going to recover. He didn't care what the doctors' said about paralysis. It wasn't going to be like that. He forced his thoughts to the now. Forced words from his throat. "Good afternoon, Kei...I'm sorry I'm late. I ran into Kai on the way here. He asked about you...he doesn't think I know he's been coming to see you...

"School's the same...Everyone asks about you...I haven't been keeping up with Kendo. Grandfather's still mad at me for giving it up...he just doesn't understand. Maybe once you wake up..." Ran blinked back tears. "You're going to wake up."

It had nearly been a year since the car had hit Enjouji. He could have been killed. It was meant to kill him. He'd been in a coma since. Ran knew he should stop calling it an accident. It was no accident. The hand not holding Enjouji's clenched. If the drivers hadn't already shown up dead he felt he could kill them himself.

"You are going to wake up." He repeated. "And we'll get a place together, just like you had been talking aobut..."

Another day. Ran walked, without thinking, through the hospital. His feet carried him to Enjouji's room automatically, but Enjouji was not there. He stood, looking at the empty space for several minutes...His mind whirled, and terror clenched his heart and throat. He turned, blindly reaching out to grab the arm of the first worker who passed by. It was the section's head nurse. "Wait. The man who was in this room, where is he?"

"Oh, you're the young man who comes to see him. He's with the doctor - they're running tests. He's awake." The nurse told him.

"Awake?" Ran repeated, and a slow smile spread across his features.

"Yes, well. There's some problems. Here they come now." She nodded at the hospital bed being wheeled toward them, and the room.

Ran's joy was tempered by the sour look on Enjouji's face. "Kei?" He called tentatively.

Enjouji's eyes snapped up, and he smiled when he spotted Ran - his face lighting up. But then the smile quickly became serious, and his eyes guarded. "Ran." He greeted.

"Well, hello. Here again?" The doctor asked Ran as he followed them into the room. The orderly who'd pushed the bed back into place nodded to the room's occupants and left.

"I thought I was supposed to be notified of changes." Ran said.

"Yes, well, we've just finished up here. Bureaucracy being what it is, there'll probably be a message on your answering machine when you get home tonight." The doctor looked at Enjouji, who sat quietly on the hospital bed. "Do spare your visitor a bit more courtesy than you have the hospital staff. He's come to see you almost every day."

Ran reached out to take Enjouji's hand, but the tormenting words he'd been about to say died on his throat when Enjouji did not reciprocate the move. He stared stonily at the doctor. "What's wrong?" Ran asked. Both men looked at him, startled. Enjouji did not reply. He glanced down at Ran's hand holding his, and slowly closed his hand around it.

"Yes, well, thre's goood news and bad news." The doctor sighed. "The good news is your friend is awake. There's no appparent brain damage, no memory loss, and his upper body is just fine. His lower body, however, appears to be immobile. Now, there's many reasons this could be, several temporary. But until the tests are completed we won't know."

"How long will that take?" Ran queried.

"Several weeks, atleast. Please excuse me." He left the room.

Ran turned to embrace Enjouji, who drew back. "Kei, what is it?"

"I can't move my legs." Enjouji replied.

"It could be temporary...Even if it's not, it doesn't matter as long as you're awake."

"It does matter." Enjouji replied stubbornly.

"Kei..." Ran looked at him sadly. Then he leaned down to kiss him. At first Enjouji resisted, but after a moment his arms reached out
to wrap around Ran, and pull him onto the hospital bed with him. When the kiss ended, Ran leaned his head on Enjouji's shoulder.

"It's been a year since I felt your kiss. I've missed it. I've missed you."

"Kissing is almost all I can do now." Enjouji said bitterly.

"I don't care. I know what you're hinting at and my answer is no. I'm not leaving you."

"What good am I to you like this?"

"You wouldn't leave me, if our positions were reversed. If the car had hit me...I wish it had."

"Don't wish that. Not ever." Enjouji shook him.

"I'm not leaving you." Ran repeated.

Enjouji sighed, and pulled him close. "Part of me wishes you would. It would be so much better for you if you left...found someone else..."

"Never." Ran replied. "Besides...how does the rest of you feel?"

"That I'd never recover without you."

Ran found he was smiling. "Then I'm definately not leaving. Besides, I've already spent a year without you And I'm never spending another one like that."

"So, what are you going to do?"

"Get a place together, like you were trying to convince me before..."

"And you're going to work while I sit around?"

"Until you recover."

"If I recover."

"You'll find a way. I know you." Ran looked up at him. He was crying and smiling at the same time. Enjouji reached out a hand to wipe away his tears.

"Don't cry...please? I'll stop being such an idiot." Enjouji whispered. "We'll work through this together, alright? Whether or not I ever walk again."

"Do you promise me that?"

"I promise." Enjouji told him, brushing Ran's hair away from his tear-streaked face. "I promise." He repeated. "But you have to promise me something, too. You have to promise me that if I ever become a burden to you, you won't feel obligated to stay. You'll leave if, you can't take it."

"It's never going to happen." Ran told him,

"Ran..."

"I promise but it's never going to happen. I'm not staying because I feel obligated. I'm staying because I..." Ran trailed off, realizing what he was going to say. Then he opened his mouth to finish. Enjouji put his finger over his mouth to silence him.

"I love you too." Enjouji told him. New tears formed on Ran's eyelashes. "Now I"ve made you cry again."

Ran simply embraced him.

Salmon 2002