A/N: You guys know how much I love a good death story but this one is more humor death. I got the idea for this story from an idea in a book I plan to write someday. There's a guy in it who asks the girl he likes how she wants to die, so I thought I'd make it chipmunk'd! It's Simonette!
"I just can't believe it Si." Alvin said as they walked through the doors of the university lab.
They were checking out the school since Simon had just signed up.
Simon was about to respond when something else caught his eye.
It was the most beautiful creature he had ever seen.
She was a tall chipette, but the strappy, open toed, high heel sandals made her seem much taller.
Her brown locks were in a sloppy bun and her green eyes were like emeralds hidden behind her lavender glasses.
He could see the bottom of her skirt while the rest of her outfit was covered by her lab coat. Her lab coat sleeves were rolled up and Simon couldn't see any sleeves so Simon figured she was wearing a short sleeve shirt.
She continued to look in the microscope unaware of the chipmunk staring at her.
His heart skipped a beat when she looked up from the microscope and scribbled something down in her composition notebook.
"Wow" was all Simon could manage to say.
Alvin snapped his fingers in front of his brother's face. "Dude, are you listening to me?"
Simon snapped out of his trance and looked at his older brother. "Of course I was."
Alvin eyebrows shot up and he crossed his arms over his chest. "What was I talking about then?"
"How you and Brittany have decided to start trying." Simon answered.
"No I was talking about how Brittany is already pregnant." Alvin said.
"Congratulations" Simon told him.
Alvin raised his eyebrows and folded his arms across his chest. "You said the same thing a half hour ago when I told you Brittany was pregnant for the first time."
Simon wasn't paying attention. He was too busy looking at the chipette.
A smirk came across Alvin's face as he realized the reason for his trance.
"Who is she?" Alvin asked as his eyes scanned the lab.
"The one with brown locks, emerald green eyes, and wearing a lab coat." Simon said dreamily.
Alvin looked at the chipette. "She's way of your league." He commented.
Simon continued to stare at the chipette.
Alvin gave him a push. "Go talk to her."
Simon shook his head nervously. "I couldn't. I'd make a fool of myself."
"You probably would" Alvin muttered.
Simon punched him in the arm and Alvin laughed. "Just introduce yourself then as her a question about herself. Nothing too personal though."
Simon looked at his brother. "Are you sure about this."
"I'm the love doctor aren't I?" Alvin asked.
Simon rolled his eyes at his brother's behavior.
But if Alvin could get married and be expecting his first child, Simon could ask a girl out. Right?
He let out a deep breath he didn't know he was holding and walked over to the chipette.
"Hi" He said nervously.
She looked up at him. "Hello"
Simon's throat went dry at the sound of her voice. He swore she stole it from one of God's angels.
"I'm Simon" He stuttered.
She smiled. "Jeanette"
Jeanette. He name rung in his head as soon as it escaped her lips. It was without a doubt the most beautiful name he had ever heard.
"So Jeanette," Simon began. "Would you rather die by burning or drowning to death?"
Alvin's hand slapped against his forehead. How could his genius brother be so…..stupid?
Jeanette looked at Simon. She was still processing what he had just said. 'Did he just ask how I want to die?' She asked herself.
"I…um…I… uh. I don't really have a preference" She finally said.
"I'll see you around" Simon said before he quickly turned around and rushed back to Alvin.
"Nice man" Alvin told him with a grin.
"Any advice?" Simon asked.
"I'm the love doctor not a miracle worker" Alvin told him as they turned to leave.
Jeanette watched the two brothers leave.
"Drowning I guess" She whispered to herself as she stared at the spot where Simon had been standing.
Simon sighed as he sat down on a bench.
It was your typical December winter so far, and a blanket of snow had fallen on the campus grounds.
He pulled out his notebook and went back to sketching his latest invention.
He had only been sitting a couple of minutes when a chipette sat down next to him.
Simon glanced at her.
She was wearing a long purple winter coat that covered all of her outfit except for the bottom of her jeans and her purple boots; purple earmuffs covered her ears.
Her brown hair was up in a bun and lavender glasses shielded her emerald green eyes.
Wait!
Brown hair in a bun, lavender glasses, emerald greens eyes. It was Jeanette!
Simon's heart sped up when he realized it was the same chipette he had made a complete fool out of himself in front of.
Jeanette took out a cup and opened the lid.
Steam left the cup and hit Jeanette cheeks that were rosy from the cold weather.
Simon caught a whiff of the smell coming from the cup. Hot chocolate he figured.
She brought the cup to her lips and took a short sip.
She smacked her lips from the hot beverage while she pulled out a novel and snuggled deeper into the bench.
"Hi" Simon said quietly.
Jeanette's face lit up when she recognized Simon. "Hey, it's Simon right?"
Simon nodded. "And you're Jeanette"
Jeanette let out a cute giggle. "Yeah I am"
She looked back at her novel while Simon tried to concentrate on his design.
"So Jeanette," Simon began. "Would you rather die by being mauled by a bear or being mauled by a tiger?"
Jeanette looked up from her novel.
Simon's eyes grew wide as he jumped up and scrambled to collect his things. "I'll see you around" He muttered before he quickly ran off saying "Stupid, stupid, stupid" to himself.
Jeanette watched him go with a sad gaze.
She pulled out a small purple notebook and flipped it open to a page.
So far all it said was….
8/6 Would You Rather Die By Burning Or Drowning To Death?
Drowning
They were also many doodles of the name Simon around the page.
Jeanette pulled out her pen and wrote underneath her last entry…
12/18 Would You Rather Die By Being Mauled By A Bear Or Being Mauled By A Tiger?
She looked up in the direction Simon left.
She didn't know her answer yet, but when she though it over she'd know.
Simon hummed to himself as he put a book back on the self in the library.
It was February now and the cold weather was still going on outside.
His niece or nephew was due in about three months and five gambles had already been placed on whether it would be a girl or a boy.
Simon personally thought it was a boy.
He knew Alvin could handle having a boy. If he had a girl, she would be wrapped around poor Alvin's finger.
Brittany might not be able to handle a boy though. But Brittany might not be able to handle any kid with Alvin's genetics in general.
Simon was snapped out of his thoughts when he saw a familiar face sitting down at a library table.
It was Jeanette.
Her brown hair was up in a sloppy bun. She was wearing a purple sweatshirt, jeans, and a pair of sneakers. Her emerald eyes were cover by her normal lavender glasses, though her glasses were slipping off since she was so invested in a book.
For someone who was dressed so casual, in Simon's eyes she looked beautiful.
He walked over to her and sat beside her.
She glanced at him for a second then her focus snapped back on him. "Hey Simon" She greeted.
"Hey Jeanette" He said.
She smiled at him and he felt like he was sweating like a pig.
"Whatever you do, don't talk about death" He told himself.
"So Jeanette would you rather die by heart attack or stroke?" He mentally slapped himself the moment after the words escaped his mouth.
Jeanette tried to hold back her giggles. It was an utter fail though because she burst out giggling.
Simon was confused by her sudden outburst. He got up to leave but she grabbed his wrist before he could. "Simon please don't go"
He turned back to Jeanette to see that she had stopped laughing. "You always leave before I get to answer your question."
"I thought you thought that I was psycho" Simon said.
Jeanette giggled while she shook her head. "Not at all."
She released her grip on Simon and pulled out her purple notebook.
She flipped open to her entries page and passed the notebook to Simon.
He picked up the notebook and sat back down. "You actually answered. And you doodled my name a lot."
Jeanette turned scarlet and looked away. "I didn't realize I did"
Simon put his finger under her chin and turned her head to face him. "I think it's sweet."
Jeanette smiled. "Now it's my turn."
Simon removed his hand from under her chin and gave her a confused look. "What do you mean?"
"You asked me now I ask you." Jeanette told him. "Simon, how would you rather die?"
Simon thought for a moment before he answered her. "I would like to die peacefully in my sleep at an old age, after living a full life, with you wrapped in my arms."
Jeanette felt tears come to her eyes from what he had said. "I've never heard a more beautiful way to die"
Simon wiped away her tears with his thumb. "You want to go somewhere?"
Jeanette nodded her head.
"How about the museum they have this great new exhibit on the Lewis and Clark expedition." Simon asked standing up.
Jeanette jumped up. "I've been dying to see that!" She exclaimed.
Simon chuckled. "Then let's go."
They gathered their things and walked out the library paw in paw.
Simon and Jeanette lived a happy life together.
They graduated from school, got married, and raised a family together.
They often joked about dying though no one in their family got the joke. No one got it except for Alvin and their children after they told them the story how they met.
They both died on the same November night. Simon had his arms wrapped around Jeanette just like he said he would.