Minxy: And from one crack fic to another. Ladies and gentlemen, I beg to put before you Lovely Silk Harem: Sexy Hell. Only this time, I'm messing around with Earthbound and it can only go so well. Welp, no more beating around the bush. Let's get this show on the road.
The New Year in Dalaam was a time for wishes, fireworks, resolutions and celebrations hither and thither. Men from far and wide went to wish Emperor Feng good fortune. And who wouldn't? It was enough that he was the Emperor of Dalaam and had five beautiful wives as well gold pieces at his dispense. But Emperor Feng was one of few men who managed to have a son since the last fourteen years.
Nobody knew why mostly girls were being born these past years. However, it was widely believed that it was a curse from the gods. The deities in Dalaam weren't the most benevolent creatures and they sometimes just curse these pathetic humans for their amusement.
But the Emperor of Dalaam had a son despite this. An average and pathetic son but a son nonetheless. Poo was a boy of fourteen and he was a light-skinned fellow due to his idle life. His hair was jet black and so were his eyes. For the New Year festival, he wore purple silk coat with black velvet shoes. The only thing I could say about this boy was that he was nice?
Anyways, father and son sat side by side. Upon the table were the finest delicacies and sweetmeats. Poo, because his appetite was bigger than an elephant, ate more than a man his size should be able to swallow. This sturdy and handsome farmer came before them dressed in his finest blue cotton coat.
"And I cannot wish any greater fortune than what you have now, a son in your Palace and all the women a man could desire," the farmer said. And then he went into loud musing, "And if I were also as fortunate as you were then I would've married off my daughter, who is beautiful and like a quince blossom, to your son."
Emperor Feng was proud that all these men were coming to wish him fortune and complimented his son. He did not, however, appreciate that these common men wanted their daughters to marry his son. But Emperor Feng did not want a girl who was common, pock-marked or deformed. He especially did not want his son to marry a girl who could read for they were dangerous. Poo's bride must be a pretty girl who was idiot and of noble birth.
Actually, now that he began to think about it, Poo was nearing marriageable age. He should be arranging the matter of marriage right now.
"Well then, I will buy slaves to divert him and he shall decide which one of them he will marry," Emperor Feng thought.
Then he rose and he went to Yee-soo-chii who was in Poo's throne room and said to him, "Now, my son is of marriageable age."
"And so he is," Yee-soo-chii answered. Knowing what the Emperor was about to say next, he asked, "What are you planning to do with the boy?"
As he predicted, the Emperor spoke forth, "There is the silk merchant named Yang Tai and he has a daughter named Jin Tai. I want you to go to him and arrange the matter. However, she can only come here and be a concubine unless my son decides that she should be his wife."
"And I will do what the Great Ancient One requests of me."
And Yee-soo-chii went to arrange this thing after Emperor Feng filled his hands with gold pieces. And Emperor Feng was content that he had thing whole thing under control. Now, he can go into the inner courts and divert himself whatever woman he chose and not be bothered with his son anymore.
Arranging the matter turned out to be a success and the girl named Jin Tai came on a bright, cool and beautiful day during Spring. The procession to the Palace was an extravagant one since Yang Tai was a rich man. But Poo did not see the procession. Rather, he hid in his bedroom because he was a shy boy and did not know how to present himself before this girl who would soon be his concubine.
You see, Poo was not very good with women. I would go as far as to say that he was a woman's bitch. Even a man like him is strong enough to stand his ground but I guess his balls are smaller than Charles II of Spain's. Thus, even little girls can beat him up. However, if the black jade bangle on his right hand were to disappear, he would become a completely different person. But that was a rare occasion.
"Poo, you must appear before your lady at once!" Someone called from outside.
Poo groaned as he reluctantly got up. He was not ready to appear before this girl. But it must be done. As he walked through hall after hall and court after court while looking down, it felt like a long way even though the Palace of Dalaam was his home. After what seemed like forever, he reached the staircase. Poo gulped then he slowly but surely made his way down.
As he did so, Poo suddenly began to imagine what this new concubine of his was like. Perhaps she was a seductive and busty woman. Perhaps she was a voluptuous but shy and clumsy girl. Perhaps she was a tsundere. Abuse may turn the rest of us off but there are those people who are turned on by them. Dalaam is filled with them.
When he was almost there, he saw her. A fair and petite girl with A-cups, cat-like golden eyes and long white hair styled into odango buns with pigtails. She looked at him angrily and huffed when she turned away. Poo was so captivated by this girl that he didn't notice the banana peel on the second to final step and he slipped. Somehow, he flew towards her and fell right on top of her, his hands now having a firm grasp on the breasts she apparently had. Seeing the awkward position they were in, Poo tried to explain that it was an accident. However, he did not get off of her.
The girl reacted quickly and proceeded to kick Poo in the groin. That got him off of her. The girl got to her feet and dusted herself off.
"If I knew that this pathetic baka was to be my master, I would not have come here!" Jin screamed with her shrieking voice that is totally pleasant to the ears. Then she turned to one of the slaves and yelled, "Where is my room?"
A maid who was quiet and just as petite as Jin was gestured for the young lady to follow her and they went. Meanwhile, Poo was still crouching on the floor. Tears were flowing out of his eyes and his nose was bleeding. Whoever was in the room just stared at him in his pitiful state. Then he muttered suddenly: "I was only trying to be nice..."
And, for now, we must close the curtains on this ordeal.
Minxy: Oh boy, this was a pain to write! Especially since Poo is my favorite character in the Mother series! Look at what I've done to him! But don't worry, I didn't give him that bangle for nothing. Also, I hope you like himederes. Anyways, don't forget to leave a review. I rarely ever write legit stories because I'm unsure of my writing abilities.