AUTHORS NOTE:

This is sort of random – I thought of all the things while I was playing tennis. Like, strange! But anyway, I don't know how long this will be. I'll just constantly add things when I think of them. It isn't a story – just a lot of little short things that you can read seperatly or whatever. BTW, I don't own anything that Eion Colfer wrote. I am sad. So here are all my little pieces of random, stupid, silly story-type things. Have fun!

The Sketch Show

Number 1: I'm Sorry!

Police Plaza

It was training time for the fairies involved in the upcoming police crunchball match. All of Recon had turned up for training and at this very moment Holly and the commander were throwing the ball to each other while their coach, Foaly, tried to hack into the computer records of the team they would be playing.

"Why the hell does that stupid centaur get to coach us anyway?" Asked Root.

"Because I am the only one of you Recon jocks who does not enjoy physical activity. With the exception of Grub Kelp and Ark Sool, but you don't really want them as the coach - do you, Julius?"

"LOOK, FOALY. THE FACT THAT I AM COMMANDER SHOULD SAY SOMETHING TO YOU ABOUT THE WAY YOU TALK TO ME BUT IT DOESN'T. IN FACT, I DON'T KNOW WHY I DON'T JUST FIRE YOU THIS INSTANT!"

"You don't fire him, commander, because his gadgets come in handy 'occasionally'." Holly remarked, smiling.

"More than occasionally!" Protested Foaly.

"Whatever." Holly threw the ball to Root. She had overthrown it a bit and he had to run and retrieve the ball. "Sorry, commander."

"It's okay, captain. You don't have to apologise."

"Oh. Sorry."

"Short, I said it was okay!"

"Ooops. Sorry about that."

"Short. Shut up!"

"Okay." Holly realized that saying 'okay' had violated the 'shut up' rule. "Sorry." Then she realized what she had just said. "Sorr- I mean…….Oops?"

"Look, Holly. By apologizing for that you are assuming that I wouldn't be able to go and get it. Are you implying that I am too old/unfit to get a ball that someone has thrown to me?."

"No, sir. Sorry, sir. I didn't mean that."

"Good." He threw the ball past her head. It hit Foaly and knocked his foil cap askew.

"Ow!"

"And I didn't say sorry to you OR him because you all realize that it was an accident."

"Got it, commander." Holly didn't actually get it but she wasn't about to apologize for it. She threw the ball too far again. It hit Chix Verbil in the shoulder.

"Sor-"

The commander held up a warning finger. "Don't say it!"

"Ooops. Sorr-"

"Short. Don't do it!"

"I'm sor-" That was when the ball hit her in the face. "Ow!"

"And, even though that was on purpose, I will not apologize! Because I did it for your own good."

Holly didn't get this logic either. Foaly picked up the ball and threw it to the commander. But, due to his lack of co-ordinaiton, the ball went waaaaaay harder and further than expected and ended up hitting the commander somewhere………very sensitive.

"And I'm not going to apologize to Julius because that was a complete accident. Right?"

And as the commander lay on the floor in pain he tried his hardest to think of something to say to Foaly. He could only think of one thing. "D'ARVIT!"

AUTHORS NOTE:

See? I told you it was stupid. So please review. If you love it, tell me. If you think it could be better, tell me. If you hate it, tell me! Go to town! Insult me! At least I'll be getting reviews! Seeyas!