A/N: I'm not really sure where this came from, haha. But once I got the idea I knew I had to write it up. I didn't proof read this, oops!
i.
One week had passed since Rachel left Lima. One week since Finn asked her to surrender, and then she's put on a train to New York City. It hurt her so much to leave him there, they were supposed to get married, but he believes in her so much, it almost would have hurt her not to get on that train. Nothing is more valuable to her than Finn, not even New York City, not even NYADA.
She'd met her dads in New York. They went with her to the NYADA campus, and they all saw her dorm room. But Rachel couldn't help but feel like everything was wrong. Sure, NYADA was her dream, but none of it felt right if she was going to do it without Finn.
She still had two weeks until the classes at NYADA begun, and she's decided to take a trip back to Lima. She told everyone that it was to go and pick up the rest of her belongings, but it's not. She's there to get back the one person she loves more than anything in the entire world.
ii.
It's a Saturday when she arrives home. Her dads welcome her in the door and she simply tells them that she needs to rest for a few hours. So they graciously give her some time alone.
She lies there tossing and turning for hours, her face shining with tears. It's almost like she doesn't want to see him again, like she's worried he'll just break her heart again. She doesn't want that. She just wants everything to be perfect again.
She makes her way down the stairs, her eyes red.
"Are you okay Pumpkin?" She gets asked the second they see her.
"I'm fine." She lies. "Just tired, that's all."
Her dads share a knowing look, and she can tell that they just want to help her, but she's too scared to let them know what she really wants. If she gets her way then she won't be going to NYADA for another year. And well, Rachel Berry always gets her own way.
iii.
She calls Kurt the next morning, to let him know that she's back in Lima, even if it is supposed to only be for a short time. He requests to see her, and she agrees to meet him at The Lima Bean in an hour.
She dresses in a pair of jeans and a simple shirt. She doesn't feel like dressing up. She meets Kurt just after 11 am, and he's already waiting for her when she arrives.
"Hey Kurt." She slips into the chair opposite him.
"Hey." He offers her a sincere smile, which she'd return if she wasn't so tired. "How's everything?" He asks, perhaps a little reluctantly.
"Broken." She answers. The tears on her face and her tired eyes might have given that away. Kurt doesn't say anything more, and they just sit in silence. Honestly, she's glad she can do that with someone.
She sits there for ten minutes under Kurt's gaze. He's subtly pressing her to tell him more, but she just shakes her head before looking down at her cup once more. She doesn't really feel like saying anything.
It's another ten minutes before either of them speak again.
"Come on, let's go." Kurt says, practically pulling her up from her seat. He leads her outside, hugging her the second the sun hits them. "I'm here for you, you know?" He asks, and she nods her head, of course she knows that.
"Well, I think i'm going to go and lie down Kurt." She says.
He nods this time. "Okay Rachel, i'll see you again before you leave?"
"Yes."
He hugs her one more time before she turns to walk back home. She's almost around the corner when Kurt calls out to her. She looks back and he's standing in the same place outside The Lima Bean.
"He's hurting too, you know?"
She knows who he's talking about. She gives Kurt one small nod before turning away from him, and this time she doesn't stop the tears from falling. She can't stop them.
iv.
She knocks on the Hudson-Hummel front door two days later. As the door is swung open she's immediately engulfed in a hug, thanks to Carole.
"Rachel." Carole whispers in her ear, holding her tight. "You have no idea how happy I am to see you."
That comment is truly the only thing that makes Rachel smile since she's returned to Lima.
"You need to help him." Carole grabs both of Rachel's hands. "He hasn't even gotten out of bed. Finn needs you more than anything Rachel."
"Oh, actually i'm here to see Kurt."
"Oh honey, he isn't here. He's out with Blaine right now." Carole replies with a watery smile.
"That's okay, i'll come back later."
Before Rachel can turn and retreat back to the comfort of her bed, she hears footsteps padding across the floor and she doesn't have to look before she knows that they belong to Finn.
"Rachel." He spits out when he notices her there, she can hear the venom in his voice. "What are you doing here?"
"Finn, honey." His mother speaks up, "Rachel's just here to pick up a few of her things."
"No she's not." He says, basically glaring at Rachel.
"I – I'm sorry Finn." She says quickly, perhaps glaring back at Finn, before turning to Carole. "I shouldn't have come, i'm sorry, tell Kurt I came by, okay?" A tear falls down her cheek, and she knows Carole sees it before she wipes it away.
"Sure sweetie." Carole adds with a hug and before she knows it, Rachel's walking down the front steps, so hurt from how Finn just treated her. A week ago they were on their way to get married, now he's angry at her for being at his house?
v.
She calls Kurt up later that night, and he already knows.
"I am so sorry Rachel, I didn't expect him to act like that." He tells her. "You know he wants nothing more than to take you back into his arms, he wouldn't stop telling us."
"Well it doesn't seem that way to me." She replies.
"Believe me Rachel when I say that I have never seen Finn like this before. He basically threw the best thing in his life away, and when she shows up on his doorstep again he realises his mistake, and he's angry at himself for everything." She nods on the other end of the phone, even though Kurt can't see her. "He loves you Rachel, he probably always will."
"I love him too Kurt, so much."
"I know." He tells her.
She stays silent for the rest of the phone call, before hanging up and crawling into bed. It's the only thing that gives her any kind of comfort right now. She pretends she's sleeping when her dad comes to check on her about an hour later.
vi.
She's decided that she's going to talk to Finn no matter what it takes. What happened to that boy who loves her so much that he was frightened to go through with the wedding? She just wants him back.
She takes a walk down the road to the Hudson-Hummel house. She's hoping Finn is there alone, but if he's not, she'll pretend she's looking for Kurt again.
Knocking three times, she waits, listens for any sign of someone inside. It takes a few minutes before she hears the heavy footsteps coming down the stairs. The door is thrown open and the first thing she sees is Finn's chest. She peers up to his face and sees his emotion change when he realises that it's her.
"What are you doing here?"
She ignores him. "Are you home alone?"
He nods once, he's still acting cold towards her.
"Can I come in?" She asks, and he sighs before stepping back and opening up the door wider for her. "Thank you."
It's weird, she doesn't know how to act around him anymore. Like the last year hasn't even happened. It makes her sad, she was so comfortable with Finn, and now they're both putting up walls to keep the other out.
"Did you come here to talk?"
"Well, um.. yes."
She sees him roll his eyes. "Only if you're willing to listen though." She adds quickly.
"Fine." He looks at his watch. "But now for long, I have work soon."
She knows that's a lie. She knows his work schedule. It's probably just a way to get rid of her. She wanders over and sits on the couch, watching him as he sits down next to her.
"Finn, I want to tell you the truth." She says quietly. "I lied to everyone else, but I can't lie to you.. even if you hate me."
"I don't hate you." He says instantly.
She wants to smile at his words, but doesn't. "I told everyone that I was only coming back to Lima to collect a few of my things." She looks up at him, a blank expression on his face. "But that's a lie. I'm coming back for one reason."
He looks up, and his eyes lock with hers. "I came back for you Finn." She waits a few minutes to let that comment fully sink in. He looks back down at his hands.
"Why?" He finally speaks up. "I – I gave up everything so you could live your dream, and now you're telling me that you've given it up?"
She feels awful. "Yes." Hesitantly, she reaches over and takes his hand, he doesn't pull away, but he doesn't hold her hand back, she's not sure whether to take that as a good thing or a bad thing.
"I – I'm not going to NYADA." She says simply, like it's not the worst thing to possibly tell him.
"What?" He roars, standing from the couch.
"Finn, Finn please sit down, you're scaring me." She says, and he lowers back down onto the couch. "Well," she continues, "at least.. not this year."
Rachel's lucky she's managed to tell him this much without getting kicked out of the house. She sees him clench his fists and she feels the hot tear running down her cheek.
"Rachel, I gave up everything -"
"I know." She says. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have come."
She gets up to leave, hoping he'll take her to the door or something. He doesn't move. "It's okay, i'll show myself out." She says. She misses the times when he'd walk her to the door and then kiss her on the porch until someone realised.
"No, wait." He says. And he stands, taking long strides over to her. "I'm sorry." He walks behind her to the door, says goodbye and watches as she disappears around the corner.
vii.
He wants to make this right, but he can't seem to get over the fact that she just gave up everything. He knows she hasn't told everyone about her plans to attend NYADA next year. He kinda hates that he has to keep that a secret.
He texts her two days later, saying that he wants to meet up with her again, privately. She agrees a few minutes later, suggesting that they meet at the park later and that they can just sit in his truck and talk, if that's what he wants.
So twenty minutes later, she's sitting at the park, waiting for Finn to show up. And when he does, she jumps down off the table and walks over to him.
"Rachel," he starts, and she's glad he does. "I don't want to look back on my life and think 'what if', what if I just pushed you away again."
She nods in agreement. He takes her hand, gripping it tightly. "It took that week for me to realise that I don't want to live without you. I can't live without you."
He then takes her by surprise, grabbing her face with both his hands and kissing her hard. She's taken aback at first, but slowly starts kissing him back. This is what she wants, isn't it?
He breaks away as quickly as it starts. "But I can't do that to you." He says softly. "I can't take you away from your dreams."
She wants to cry. She's getting nowhere with him. She tries to stop herself from sobbing in front of him, but fails. She can see the tears welling up in his eyes too.
Nothing is said as she slips across the truck, opening the door and letting her feet fall to the ground. He's left her too emotionally damaged to look back as she makes her way across the park, and back home.
viii.
She lies in bed for the rest of the day, realising that it is in fact the next day when she wakes up. She checks her phone in case Finn changed his mind since yesterday, but he didn't. There's only a text from Kurt.
"What happened between you two yesterday? We need to talk."
She texts him back. "I'm not sure I want to talk about it, you can come over if you like."
"I'll be there in ten." His reply is quicker than she expected.
She only has enough time to shower quickly and dress before she heard the knock on the door. She runs down the stairs quickly, only to see Kurt peering through the window next to the front door.
"Hi Kurt." She says, opening the door.
"Rachel." He replies. "I need you to tell me, what happened with you and Finn?"
"I don't think I can."
"Tell me." He says, pointing a finger straight in her face. "I'm the best friend and the brother, I have a right to know." He's pushing her and to be honest, she's a little scared of him.
"Fine." She says. "But we have to sit down."
She leads him into her lounge room, sitting down on one end of the couch, Kurt sitting on the other.
"Well," she begins, "He texted me and said that he wanted to meet up with me. I agreed because I really just wanted to see him again. He tells me that he doesn't want to look back on his life and think 'what if', and that he can't live without me." She takes a deep breath. "Then he kissed me Kurt. And I thought everything was going to be okay. Until he said that he couldn't do that, he couldn't get in the way of my dreams."
"Oh." It's all Kurt says.
"I'm such an idiot." She says, dropping her face into her hands.
"No you're not." She looks up to Kurt. "You want him, then fight for him. Show him that you're not going to give up. You're Rachel Berry aren't you?" She giggles, and nods. "He wants to get back together with you so badly. Trust me, I know."
"Kurt, you're absolutely right." She stands and moves to hug him. "Thank you." She whispers against his shoulder.
"Go now." He instructs. "He's home alone."
"Okay." She hugs him again. "Thank you Kurt."
He tries to break away, but she holds him tight. "Oh gosh Rachel, just go already!"
He laughs and she joins in, perhaps things can be better.
ix.
He's in the back yard when she gets there, so she goes around the side of the house. He's definitely surprised to see her there, but he isn't so distant towards her. Rachel wonders if Kurt spoke to him as well.
"Finn," she starts and he looks at her. "I thought you should know that i'm not giving up. I'm going to defer for a year, and i'm going to spend that year here, in Lima, with you. And if you want to be with me, then be with me, but please don't take a year to realise that's what you want."
"Rachel," he says, taking a step towards her. "What about NYADA, Broadway, it's still your dream, right?"
"Yes." She admits. "But i'm not doing it unless you're by my side." She reaches forward and takes both his hands in hers. "Broadway is still my dream, but you're my biggest dream Finn."
"I – I can't. I couldn't live with myself, what if you miss your chance because you're her-"
"Finn," she warns, "I surrendered for you, now it's your time to surrender for me." She looks straight into his eyes, waiting for an answer. "Will you surrender?"
He sighs, dropping his shoulders. He's silent for a while, perhaps he's angry at her. "Yes." He whispers. "Yes, I'll surrender."
She lets go of his hands, launching forward and wrapping her arms around him. He grips her around the waist. "Are you sure this is what you want?" He asks. She nods into his chest.
"I'm one hundred percent sure Finn. You are my future. I know i'll be happy as long as you're with me." She can feel the tears in her eyes.
Before he can say anything, she stands on her toes and presses her lips to his. She feels him smile as he tightens his grip on her. Slowly, she slips her tongue into his mouth, swirling around with his own. Her hand moves to the back of his neck, pulling him further down.
It feels like forever since she kissed him last, it's definitely something she misses.
She pulls away, staring up into his eyes. His grip on her doesn't loosen as he looks right back at her. She can see the beginnings of a smile on his lips, and she can't stop herself from smiling too.
"I love you Rachel Berry." He says.
"I love you too, Finn Hudson." She replies.
"And i'm not ever letting you go, again." He says, and she almost feels shy under his gaze so she ducks her head.
"Good." She whispers, and her lips are on his again, this time more needy than the last. She can feel hot tears on her cheeks but she doesn't know if they're his or if they're her own. She feels his grip move to her butt and she's been in this position so many times before, so she knows what to do.
She jumps, wrapping her legs around his waist, and she's quite lucky that he catches her. He stops kissing her enough to move them inside, his lips sucking on her neck as soon as he sees the opportunity.
It's safe to say that Kurt is over the moon when he finds out that they sorted out their problems.
A/N: Ugh, well I hope that was alright. You know what to do now!