Sam looked down where Freddie's face seemed serene as his chest would rise slowly and patiently. He was beautiful, with his long eyelashes and soft face. She was sitting down next to him on his bed, with the tip of her hands slightly touching him, going through his hair. She couldn't help but smile down at him, thinking about what idiotic scenes he causes himself just to get a girl. It reminds her when he had kissed her, for the second time at the mental institution, with millions of fans watching through the internet. She can't even herself believe that she had forced a kiss on him, over a year ago at the lock-in when he had thought it was Brad she was heels over head for.
There was so many memories they had together, just them, and seeing that he was moving on actually hurt her. Maybe she wasn't in love with him anymore, and maybe it was time for both of them to find a new soul-mate, but he was actually the first boyfriend she had ever - ever - opened up to. She knew they had a good run, and until this moment she doesn't blame Carly for being the cause of their break-up, but herself. Maybe the time had been right for them not to be together anymore, and breaking-up that night was the best they could do for each other. She wasn't going to drag him down, and he wasn't going to bring hopes up.
Seeing him sleep only reminded when she had convinced him to sneak out one night after her mother had drifted to a deep sleep and she'd sneaked in. He laid so peacefully in his sleep on his bed, she hated to burg in and disturb his slumber, but she just wanted to be with him at the moment. So she shook him up, and dragged him out into the park where they sat on the swings, looking up at the grey sky at two in the morning. He wasn't mad, he had said. Instead he would hold her hand while they swinged them self back and forth.
He made a face, his upper lip twitching and at the same time his eyebrow did. She chuckled and sighed. She parted her dry lips, and in a husky whisper she spoke to him, "You're not mine anymore," as if he were awake and could respond. That fact only made her sad, in a way. She knew Freddie was such a great guy, she didn't know why she had let him go; maybe it was that she already knew they weren't going to last and she ran out before things got out of control and she would actually fall hard.
That night, after the elevator, when they finally had said their goodbyes, it was as if she'd left a piece of her heart with him. She didn't cry because she figured that many come and go, but then she didn't realize how wrong she was. Not once did someone just like Freddie appeared in her life but the one that was now laying there next to her. She moved some of her blond curls from her face to behind her ears and just that instant realized that there was no one like him. And she'd let him go, for him to move one and find another girl that will love him forever.
She had missed being this close to him, on the bed, with her hands doing sorts of massages on him while she admired his slumber. When they'll put a movie on in the middle of the night and he'll fall asleep on her with his head rested on her stomach.
"Mm-mm," he mumbled causing her to startle and sit up. Her back erect with her knees still on the bed, he slowly rattled his head and gently fluttered his eyelashes open. And he felt someone quickly get up from his bed. It was a matter of seconds when his big, brown eyes were revealed to see the blurry image of Sam who seemed to be in a rush to exit his room, and it was then when her hand reached for the door's knob that he called out her name.
Getting caught she stood there, not calling out just in case he fell back to sleep and she didn't fully wake him. But she was out of luck when he leaned on his elbows, fully awake now to see the girl as he started to sit up and yawned. "Sam, what are you doing here?" He asked, suddenly touching his cheek and silently groaning, massaging his jaw. He then remembered, and looked at the time to be eight. Gibby had punched him, for real, not letting him duck out of the way like they'd planned. "Where's Gibby?" He asked as he stood up and started to march toward the door.
"He feels horrible about the whole incident," she mentioned and tucked her thumbs on her front pockets. He stopped and looked at her, again remembering that she was in his bedroom, and had no idea why. Which was his next question, once again asking why she was in his bedroom. "Don't you remember you fainted?" She asked, a deadpan expression on her face as he hesitated to answer and looked down.
"Yeah, well, it was because of Gibby! He punched me!" He tried to defend himself, the tip of his ears turning red from the furry he wasn't able to express because he knew that if he took it upon her she'll return it with twice the punch. "And what does that have to do with you-"
"Spencer brought you up here, and I stayed to cool off your cheek with a bag of ice so it wouldn't bruise." She informed and started to head out the door as she looked at him, "So a 'thanks' wouldn't kill ya', would it?" His shoulders lost its grip and fell as he watched her leave his bedroom. And he couldn't help but ask himself why Sam had been the one to stay and fix him up. The best conclusion he could figure was because she was being forced.
He quickly walked out and she was already reaching his front door, "Sam?" He called out making her stop and turn to looked at him. She just raised her eyebrow and he cleared his throat, and with a smile he said, "Thanks..you know, for curing my bruised cheek. My mom wouldn't gone bananas if she were to ever see it." He joked, and she grinned, slightly, but he still noticed it.
"Welcome, Benson." And she turned once again for her to leave, but was once again stopped when he called out her name. She turned and sighed, "Yeah?"
"Why did you..I mean, why would you.."
"I don't have all day, dork."
"Why were you the one to stay and ice my cheek?" He asked, a question she wasn't expecting. She didn't know why she had offered to help him, when Carly said she wouldn't mind. Shay just seemed a little bothered with the fact that she was going to fix him up, so Sam stepped in and offered. Carly quickly agreed, and pushed Sam into the Benson apartment before changing her mind. And when the door closed, she took some ice in a zip-bag and wrapped it with napkins, gently pressing it on his cheek.
"Does it bother you that it was me who iced your cheek?" Sam asked a little hurt as Freddie automatically shook his head and made his way toward her.
He sighed and there was a couple of seconds of silence before he spoke, "It's just that..."
"That...?" She asked, hurrying him with her hands as he thought about everything that seemed to be going on lately. Sam seemed to care. About him. With many occasions, such as when he was ridiculed a while back when he was co-host in iCarly and people seemed to like "Baggles" better. When she quit her good-paying job after he got fire just to show him respect (even though she kept assuring him that it was because she was to lazy to work and now that he was gone there was no one else she could bother).
"You've been..nice.'' He finally said, in a low voice just in case she was bothered by the comment.
"And that bothers you?"
"Well, no, but..why?"
She sighed, obviously she really didn't want to tell him why she was being nice. She still cared, but he couldn't know that. No matter what, she couldn't let him know that she cared about him in any sort of way.
"Because Carly makes me. Trust me, if it wasn't for Carly I would've given you that extreme-wedge a long time ago." She smirked and he just chuckled nodding.
"Of course," was all he said as he started making his way toward her as she exit. He followed her outside, and she looked at him, "Can I help you?"
"Huh? Oh, no, I'm heading to the Groovy Smoothie and see if that chic is still there."
She stopped walking and looked at him, just as he turned to look at her. "Is something the wrong, Sam?"
Yes! Everything's the matter! You falling for someone else, forming a fake band just to impress her! And once again, a brunette, just like Carly! Everything's wrong because I still care, and miss you.
"No." She said with a dull expression and headed for the door next to the elevator, opening it and making her way in.
"You're taking the stairs?" He asked the obvious and she just shrugged.
"What does it look like, nub?" And with that she walked in, taking the stairs slowly with a heavy heart. She not supposed to cry, and she's not going to cry. It's time to move on. Freddie moved on so easily, she should be able to do so as well. It shouldn't be so hard; after all, Freddie had been like all her other boyfriends, typical mid-way break-ups. It's over, and it will always be over.
She took a seat on the stairs, not even reaching the seventh floor yet and exhaled a deep breath. Taking her pear-phone out she looked through her contacts, stopped scanning, pressed "call" and placed it against her ear until hearing someone answer. "Brad? Hey, it's me Sam, are you busy?"
Freddie smiled at the girl in front of him, with a sweet scent of coconut. She was pretty, with manners. When T-Bo offered her fish-on-a-stick, she politely said no and shooed him off. She didn't smack him away with an insult, something Sam would've done. He shook his head, not knowing why he was thinking about her if he was on a date with..he had forgotten her name. How can someone forget someone's name after they'd told you fifth-teen minutes ago? "Is something the matter?" She asked, and he shook his head.
"No, no, it's just-" He looked up when recognizing a very familiar laughter. And there, just then Sam had walked in with..Brad? He looked at them, able to hear their conversation clearly.
"I can't believe you smacked the hobo with a sandwich." Brad chuckled, as the blond laughed, "Well, he wouldn't stop bugging us."
"Well, yeah." He smiled and kissed her cheek, "Do you want anything?" He asked.
"Strawberry Splat?"
He nodded "Strawberry Splat coming your way," he smiled at her and she replied with her own, only to turned to see him there. There Freddie sat with the girl he had left seeking for. And her heart dropped, her smiled disappeared, and with her sad eyes she looked away. She needed to stop feeling that way, she needed to move one, weather she liked it or not.
He moved on.
She took her phone out, and quickly pretended to text, but ended up bringing herself to her photo gallery and see the old pictures of them together. With smiles, and kisses and simply being happy then. She missed that. She couldn't help but to look his direction from the corner of her eye, and there he still was, trying to make conversation but seemed to keep glancing at her direction. Especially when Brad returned with two smoothies as he handed Sam one.
He took a seat next to her and smiled, "So, Sam, you actually beat five football players?" She simply nodded at him, "That's insane!" She smiled. "You're insane." She looked at him and chuckled as he continued, "Amazingly insane," he whispered as he started to get closer to her and before she could do anything Brad was too close to her face. And fluttering her eyelashes shut she felt Brad's soft lips gently press against hers.
The feeling was different. Very different. His lips were very different as well; they were thin and didn't tickle as they would press against her. She didn't know very well how to describe it, but she felt like she'd never been kissed before. Like those first kisses, that you're afraid of what to expect, weather it was good or bad, and you're still trying to decide even after it's over. She felt like that at that moment. Brad was kissing her, but they didn't feel like Freddie's at all.
She mentally slapped herself - she's not supposed to be thinking about Freddie. That's why she asked Brad on a date, to have him replace Freddie's memories.
And after a couple of seconds, she was actually getting the hang of kissing him. She felt herself smile against his lips, and it was then when she pulled away after hearing a loud thump. In a heartbeat she looked over at Freddie who was standing up with the Groovy Smoothie chair on the floor and his date looking at him with a very confused face. Sam almost had the same expression, but not as surprised.
Instead of asking any details about the whole drama that seemed to be going on while T-Bo complained to Freddie about the furniture, she stood up and took Brad's hand and dragged him out of the place with smoothie on hand. They didn't make it far when Freddie seemed to follow them and grasp Sam's hand, dragging her away. But she didn't let herself so easily, squeezing it out of his as she asked, "What do you think you're doing, nub?!"
"Why were you kissing Brad?" He asked in a whisper as Brad stood there, looking at them not able to make what he had just said.
"I don't have to answer you, Benson, we broke up over a year ago!"
"That doesn't mean-"
"What? That I can't go around and try to move on?"
"Try?"
She shifted her body weight to the other side and looked down, then back at Brad who seemed a little confused. He really didn't want to interfere since he knew Freddie and felt like he was telling her something important that he didn't want anyone else to hear. So he stood there, feet away, waiting for them to finish; thinking to himself that Freddie could've been less rude.
"Sam, do you still-?"
"While you go and make googly eyes at some other bimbo girl, I am trying to get a serious relationship with someone who appreciates me."
"Oh, so I didn't appreciate you? I wasn't your ideal boyfriend?"
"Freddie, leave me the fuck alone. I don't feel like putting up with you today." She turned, and started to make her way back to Brad.
"Sam! Look," he said and grasped her elbow trying to pull her back, but Sam in anger turned and pushed him away.
"I am tired of you, Freddie! I am so tired of you!" She screamed, getting some attention of people that passed by them, and Brad who stared at them and started to get closer. "You want to know the truth, okay, yeah, maybe I still like you, but I don't. I don't want to like you, I don't want anything to do with you because I hate it! I hate everything about you! Now with you leave me the fuck alone?!" And with a flushed face she stomped away from him and made her way back to Brad. Leaving Freddie there, on the sidewalk looking back at the blonde.
Why had he gone and chased her? The first time worked when he had kissed her on the mental institution, why would he think he'll be lucky twice. He tucked his hands inside his pockets and kicked a the sidewalk. He sighed and looked over at Sam who was now arm in arm with Brad who was now making her smile. Then he looked back at the Groovy Smoothie door and he saw whatever-her-name-is and she rushed out to approach him.
"Are you okay?" She asked as he looked at her.
No.
"Yeah," he smiled and followed her back into the Groovy Smoothie giving once last glance at Sam who had glance back at the same time. Then she looked away, and she was gone with Brad when they took a turn at the same time he went in with the girl.
They were no longer together, and it seemed like they never were going to be.
