OK so I wrote this chapter thinking I could insert in in my "Wishes can come true " story but I think It would fit at all so I said to myself: Hey it would make a good one shot…
Please read and review, but be aware that the Jane pictured here is 10000000 miles from the one we know and love.:)
Jane and Maura were enjoying a quiet night in a Jazz club Maura has been begging Jane to take her to for weeks. Of course What Maura wanted from Jane, Jane gave it to her .
The two women were enjoying their romantic evening but something was bothering Jane.
"Jane, is there something wrong?" Maura asked noticing that Jane's mind was obviously somewhere else.
"No expect those two morons over there who can't stop looking at you." Jane groaned.
"Yes, I noticed, don't worry about them, I only have eyes for you tonight ." Maura said smiling at the two guys seating a few tables away.
"Don't encourage them." Jane shouted.
"I'm only trying to be civil. Please calm down ok." Maura almost begged her hand on Jane's.
"See they're smiling back now, enough is enough." Jane brutally said standing up.
"Jane, don't." Maura said trying to stop her.
" Something wrong gentleman?" Jane asked not even trying to hide her anger.
"No, nothing wrong, we're ok why?" One of the men replied winking at his friend.
"Because you've been staring at me and my girlfriend for quite some time now."
"We were just admiring her beauty and thinking that she had the hottest rack we' ve seeing in a long time. " The second man said looking at Jane as a way of defying her.
"That's enough." Jane said grabbing and twisting the guy's arms behind his back tearing him as hard as she could and pulling her handcuffs of her pocket.
"Jane, would you stop it please." Maura pleaded trying this non sense.
"What?The guy is not only flirting with you and he's also disrespectful."
" He just looked at me and smiled, I'm an attractive woman and he looks like an healthy guy it makes sense that he would be attracted to me." Maura replied trying to rationalize with Jane.
"No Maura, you're my girlfriend, you're with me, you don' t get to let some guy flirt with you ." Jane strongly stated.
"Stop over reacting , I wasn't even flirting back." Maura begged unable to recognize her usually caring girlfriend.
"I know, but you let him flirt with you, you're with me so you don't get to do that, now leave it and let's go home." Jane said grabbing Maura's arms.
"Jane! Would you stop it." Maura shouted as Jane was trying to take her outside.
Once they reached the parking Jane finally let go of Maura's hand.
"What was that all about?"
"He was hitting on you and you seemed to like it."
"No, I mean , I certainly found it flattering when someone shows interest in me."
"That's the problem, the only interest you should care about is mine."
"What do you want me to do?Stop wearing make up, stop being feminine and take care of myself just because I'm with you?"
"I just want you to stop feeling the need to seduce like that I want you to try to seduce me, only me."
"That's what I'm doing, I didn't stop him but I never encouraged him, now take me home."
"OK fine."
They drove back home in silence, Jane 's adrenaline started to drop and she started to feel guilty about what she did.
"Please Maura I'm sorry." Jane begged as Maura opened the door.
"Please go home." Maura said ready to close her door on Jane's face.
"No I won't go home until we talk about this."
"What is there to talk a bout? You obviously don't trust and you see me as a frivolous woman who enjoys being hit on by random strangers. nothing else to say."
"Oh no Maura, I do trust you,I just can't bear the thought of someone wanting, desiring you, I'm just scared that one day you will realize you can do better."
"We talked about this before, if you still don't believe me or trust me there is nothing I can do. I understand your lack of confidence and I'm willing to reassure and re express my feelings every day for the rest of my life if that's what you need but I will not tolerate the attitude you just gave me. I won't tolerate to be treated like a object
that belongs to you."
"You know it's not like me, I respect you and I want to treat you like a queen because that's why you are to me, please just forgive me, it's just these freaking insecurities , please just forgive me, I love you."
"I love you too but you need to go home now and don't call me until you're calm and reasonable."Maura said shutting the door.
For two days, they didn't speak or see each other , Maura wouldn't answer Jane 's phone calls or text and Jane wouldn't go to see her scared of being rejected.
Until one morning she received a text from her,. As her name popped on her screen her heart stopped beating.
"I will be in NYC for a week for that convention I told you about. I will probably see you when I get back. Maura"
"Probably?What's that' supposed to mean? Is there a chance she won't come back to me? I can't loose her, I can't follow her to NYC that would be stalking, I have to give her time, maybe it's not totally over." Jane said to herself scared to death of losing the best thing that ever happened to her.
For a week Jane restrained herself from calling or texting Maura, she knew she needed time to think. What she did though was sending her a bouquet of lilies every day with a card simply saying "I love you, please come back to me. Det Jane Rizolli."
The week went off fast and today was the day Maura was coming back. Jane didn't know if she should go pick her up at the airport or maybe wait for her outside her house.
Jane remembered what Maura told her : that she felt like an object. Jane was hurt by that comment, yes she was possessive but she respected her and her wishes and desires more then anything else. So she figured she had to let Maura decided to come back to her. She couldn't possibly force herself on her. it
Maura spent the few hours the flight lasted thinking about Jane. She always knew Jane had trust and confidence issues. She knew she trusted her and knew she would never cheat on her but she was still afraid that Maura would find someone better and leave her which in a way was worse then cheating.
She knew it wasn't like Jane to be possessive and treat her like a price or a piece of meat like that. She remembered all the times Jane surprised her and made her heart beat faster, like on their first date or the time she told her she loved her for the first time while they were making love for the first time.
She loved her, she wanted to spent her life with her and carry her child but she knew that if she let that go it would happen again and even if she knew she could take a lot for Jane, she couldn't go through this again.
After going home and petting Bass for a while she decided to visit Jane. It was 3pm so she figured she was probably working. It was better if they talked at home she knew she wouldn't looking in her big brown eyes be able to resist kissing and holding her.
As the elevator doors opened Maura took a deep breath and walk towards Jane's desk.
As she was about 5 feet behind her, Jane noticed she was here: her perfume, she could recognized her lover's perfume among a thousand others.
"Maura, you're back." Jane said.
"Yes I am, can we please go to my office." Maura requested keeping things as professional as possible.
"Sure." Jane replied.
As they were in the elevator they didn't exchange a word and didn't look at each other. Jane had to restrain herself from moving towards Maura and hold her .
As they entered Maura's office Maura finally said:
"Look Jane I had time to think about it and what happened can not happen again, I won't allow it." Maura stated turning her back on Jane.
She knew she needed to be harsh on Jane to make her understand that she was serious. And she knew she couldn't be harsh if she looked into her eyes.
"I know." Jane whispered as she reach for Maura's should who turned around as soon as she felt her girlfriend 's touch.
"I love you Maura, please forgive me, I will do anything you want, anything, don't leave me, please." Jane begged, tears streaming down her face.
"I love you too, but you went to far this time with your insecurities."
"I know. Please It won't happen again, I' m willing to do anything I'll go to therapy if you want, but please do not leave me, I won't survive if you do."
"You hate therapy."
"I would hate leaving without you more."
"You accused me of being some seductive frivulous woman who enjoyed being hit on by strangers, you even said that I provoked them."
"I'm sorry…" Jane cried burrying her head in her girlfriend's neck.
"I never tried to seduce anybody else then you, even since the first night we spent on your couch when you felt asleep on my lap. I don't want to be attractive for anybody else then you but I can not help it if men find me attractive, and don't expect me to be rude with a man who smiles at me, that's not who i am."
"I know , please just tell me what to do, and I will do it." Jane pleaded
"I want you to take me home and make love to me, that's what I want." Maura said as she wiped the tears off Jane's face.
"Are you sure?" Jane asked surprised.
"Yes, I want you to make love to me and show me how much you love me. I want to see the real you, I want you to show me the woman I fell in love with, but I 'm warning you I will not accept to see the woman I saw the other night, ever again."
"You won't see that woman again, I swear, let's go home.." Jane promised kissing Maura's forehead.
Told you guys, I pictured a very different Jane!