Sooo. Yeah I'm warning you right now, some of these are about my OC Ami. I'm not saying you have to go and read that story but I don't know I just have to roll with this and see where it goes. Expect updates whenever I dont want to update my other stories. Yes I do realize that's not very helpful to anyone who might actually look at this. My answer? Suck it up.
Friend-*heavy sarcasm* Such good advice.
Me-*beaming* Thank you!
Friend-*sigh* I give up.
This is about Ami and Hermes. NOOOO. Not that way.
Music, out. :)
(3rd Person POV)
"Uncle Hermes, Uncle Hermes!"
Hermes looked up from his phone long enough to see Ami, Poseiden's 4-yr-old demigod daughter (Oh boy, what an uproar that had caused), hurtling towards him as fast as her little legs allowed.
"Hey kiddo!"
She giggled as he pocketed his phone and enveloped her in a hug, saving her from crashing into his legs. That might have hurt. Both of them.
"So what brings you here today?" He asked, swinging her onto his back as he started walking, making his daily rounds delivering the Olympus mail. You'd be suprised how much mail the gods get despite the fact Iris invented IM-ing, though Hermes had to admit, the number of mail he had to deliver had gone done a whole bunch after she started it.
Ami smiled with the tips of their bottom teeth showing in an irresistibly adorable way at him, in a way only little kids can pull off. She stumbled over his name a few times. "Apill-no that's not it, Polli-poo."
Hermes had to smile at her pouting face; seriously even Athena had caved into Ami's little kid charm. If she could make her father's sworn enemy for life (and that's a long life) like her, everyone else was pretty much at her mercy. "Apollo," He prompted.
Ami nodded, "That was it! He wanted me to tell you, he has to cancel the sparkle prank(A/N: O.O)you guys were planning."
He frowned, "Why?"
Ami puzzled over his question for a few seconds, "I don't know, " She said finally, giving up. "He said something about a girl."
Hermes had a pitying look on his face, and murmered, "That poor girl."
Ami was totally oblivious.
She stared at Hermes with wide innocent-looking eyes that made Hermes feel like if she did that any longer, he would be puking unicorns and rainbows. "Uncle Hermes?"
"Yeah?" he asked putting mail in a mailbox.
"Can I see George and Martha?"
Hermes almost rolled his eyes, the two snakes had enchanted Ami for some reason, making the two snakes' heads get even bigger. "Sure."
He took out his phone, "Original form."
What, no please today? A raspy voice asked.
Quiet George! Maybe he got us rats! A more feminine one snapped.
Oooh, I like rats! George replied.
As they argued, the cell phone glowed a bright blue and soon the snakes were their normal size.
Well you wont get any if you act like that!
Ami giggled in delight as she slid from Hermes's back. "Hi George and Martha!"
They stopped bickering leaning as far as they could towards her. Hi Ami. Martha said friendly.
George was not so patient. You have any rats?
Before Martha could reprimand him, Ami grinned mischeiviously, dangling two rats by their tails.
I'm gonna have to get someone to wash her pants, Hermes thought, eyeing the pocket the treats (to George and Martha) had just come out of.
A question presented itself to Hermes. "Ami," He said slowly, "where did you get those rats?"
She blinked innocently, "From the cat."
Hermes doubted any cat would give away food just like that, so he pressed on. "It just gave you them?"
Well...," She started, "It caught them, then it went away, and the rats were just sitting there. And since I was gonna see you anyways, I picked up two for George and Martha. But don't tell Auntie Hera. Last time I took stuff from her cat, she yelled at me. Meanie." She stuck out her tounge, the best insult known to little kids. "I wonder why she got upset." She cocked her head a little, trying to figure it out.
With a nervous little laugh, he distracted her from her musing. "Guess what I have in this bag," he patted his messenger bag.
Being a 4-year-old and already extremely distractable, she took the challenge. "What?"
"You really want to know?" he teased.
"I really want to know." She insisted.
"Are you sure?" Hermes asked one more time.
"I'm absolutely, positively, definitely sure." She made her face serious, looking like an exact replica of her father. If you know, Poseidon was a girl. An insanely cute 4-year-old girl.
"Ok. Cover your eyes." Then added quickly, "And no peeking."
He heard a soft 'Poo' of disappointment.
Searching through his bag, he concentrated on her gift and it popped up to the top of his bag, the bag was enchanted so it had more space than it looked like it did. How else would he be able to fit all the gods' mail as well as the occasional package for demigods? (Why did demigod packages have to be so BIG?)
"Ok. Open your eyes." Hermes instructed.
Ami's hands flew from her face in her excitement to see her present. "Wow." She breathed. "It's so pretty."
In Hermes's hands was a stuffed dolphin. Instead of being gray like regular dolphins, it was a sparkling blue like the sea, and engraved on the fins were wings, much like the ones on Hermes's sneakers. With it was a note.
Ami held the toy reverently, and then crushed it in a bear hug. Then procedeed to do the same to Hermes's legs. The bear hug part, not the other part, because that would be pretty weird. "Uncle Hermes I love it." She whispered.
Hermes blinked. He was not expecting that. A thanks, yes. But not this. Not a reaction that made her seem like she'd never gotten something so valuable. "But it's your father's gift to you." He said gently. "All I did was add wings-but don't tell your father I added them. Look, he even left a note." Hermes handed it to her.
She stared at it blankly.
"Go ahead," Hermes encouraged. "it's your note."
"I can't read it." Ami confessed. "To me it says eraD mAi I ophe uyo ilke tshi olpdinh nda ti si fo gdoo seu ot oyu Adn ot yuo torubel I sgeugts hte amne epDlihn ovle yruo add" She stumbled over the words a few times, sounding like she was speaking a foreign language.
Hermes let out a sigh, stupid dyslexia. "Let me see it." He held out a hand, and saw the problem. Poseidon had forgotten to write in Ancient Greek. He cleared his throat for dramatic effect. "It says, Dear Ami, I hope you like this dolphin and it is of good use to you. And to you trouble, I suggest the name Delphin. Love, your dad."
Ami blinked, her brain had deemed the mini-speech boring and the only part she heard was 'love, your dad' "What?"
Hermes's eye twitched a little, but under the bright wide-eyed gaze he relented. "He wants to know if you like the dolphin-"
Ami interupted him, "I do!" She nodded in agreement to her own statement.
"And you should name it Delphin." Hermes finished.
She looked at it, long and hard. "Dalp-Dille-what?"
"Dellllllphiiiiiiiiiiinnnn."
She frowned for a moment, "I'm gonna call it Delta, for short."
He frowned, "I am never helping you pronounce things ever again."
"What? Why?" Ami dragged out the last word, the very picture of agitation.
"Because." He replied stonily.
"But Uncle Hermes!" Ami whined.
"No." A small almost imperceptible quirk appeared on his lips for a second, yet Ami still caught it.
"You're laughing at me!" She accused, pointing a finger at him.
He nonchalantly closed the last mailbox of the day.
"No I'm not," He denied. In vain. When she stuck her lower lip out and glowered at him as hard and as threatning as she could (which wasn't very scary), he was forced to laugh.
Hermes bent over, choking out laughs and soon he felt a poke on his stomach.
"Uncle Hermes," Ami said seriously, "don't die."
Needless to say, that didn't help too much. He just roared in laughter, attempting to kill his stomach with the pain.
Hermes's bag slipped from his shoulder, landing on the ground next to him where he sat, reduced to chuckles. Over the past few minutes, Ami had been trying to get Hermes back on his feet and head towards the palace. Getting nowhere, she huffed, and grabbed the part actually movable. His bag.
"Whoa-hey slow down!" Hermes was subjected to awkward dragging until he worked his arm free of the strap.
So, that was how they got to the palace.
"Ami are you sure you want to do that?"
For the past few minutes Hermes had been trying to reclaim possession of his bag Ami was dragging to the palace. Keyword: HIS.
"No!" Ami was visibly tired but something kept her at it.
Hermes rolled his eyes. It wasn't like he was asking her to cut off her arm or anything. Damn 4-year-olds and their highly bruisible pride.
"But Ami, I really think-"
"No."
He tried one more time. "Ami, maybe I should-"
"Lalalalalalalalala," Ami blatantly ignored him. "lalalalalalalalala-"
He caved in, "Alright! I give up!"
Ami immediately stopped and grinned. "I win!"
Hermes stood dumbfounded for a few seconds before exasperation took over.
"Do you even know what you're winning?" He asked skeptically.
"Nope!" She smiled brightly. "It was something I heard Apollo say!"
He rolled his eyes, but couldn't keep a smile down.
Suddenly a figure came running at them.
"Hey," Up close he could see it was Apollo. "Sorry I'm late."
Hermes smirked, "Finished with her so soon?"
Apollo raised an eyebrow, "How'd you find out?"
He glanced meaningfully at Ami.
Apollo 'oh'ed.
"You really should be more careful with what you say around her," Despite his serious words, a smile cracked his lips. "Can't go around destroying innocence."
Apollo smirked, "Too late."
They snickered together.
"I did it!" A victorious shout rang out.
Ahead of them, Ami had dragged Hermes's bag all the way to the entrance of the Throne room.
"Wow," he murmured, "I didn't think she could actually do it."
"Dude," Apollo shook his head. "Never underestimate little kid power."
"You sound like you learned this first-hand."
"I did," he said grimly.
He stared for a few seconds. Then burst into laughter.
"Ha! Sucker! You... Poor... Sucker!" He gasped out between laughs.
"Oh shut up." Apollo grumbled. "Come on, we're gonna be late for the Summer Solstice." As he started jogging towards Ami, Hermes heard him mutter, "Again."
Joining Apollo inside, Zues thundered,(I know, I know)"Finally-"
Beside him Poseidon coughed, "Drama queen."
Zues glared, "Let the meeting commence!"
Hermes 'turned off' his messenger bag so it wouldn't get any more mail during the meeting, and threw it down to his feet.
When he observed the room, he saw Ami snuggling into her father's giant lap. She gave him a tiny wave. He smiled at her.
Athena and Poseidon were exchanging glares and remarks. Nothing new.
Apollo, headphones plugged in. Artemis was generally always bored at this point. Ares sharpened his sword with a high screeching sound that set everyone on edge.
Aphrodite touched up her makeup.
Every other god was staring blankly into space, although Dionysus was wistfully flipping through a wine magazine.
Then the inevitable happened. Athena and Poseidon's fight got to the point of yelling, and the other 11(12?)gods leaned forward, eager for entertainment.
"Yes, Fish Man* I am saying olives are better than saltwater springs!"
Unnoticed by the two arguing, a silent groan took place.
Not this argument again. That fight had been replayed over and over at the creating of Athens. The gods of Olympus did not need another repeat of that.
"Shut up Owl Head*!"
"Out of insults already?" mocked Athena.
"Anything I come up with is better than your pathetic excuses for insults." he retorted coolly.
A murmur of 'Ooh buuuurrn' chorused around the room. Even from Dionysus, who had closed his wine magazine to watch.
Athena's face turned red before she continued yelling at him.
Suddenly a tiny voice rang out. "Stop, stop, stop!" Ami demanded in a yell. The two gods unused to being interrupted when they fought, looked at each other uncertainly. "You always fight! Stop it, stop it, stop it!" She crossed her arms, sticking out her lower lip.
Athena raised an eyebrow at Poseidon, unsure of what to do. He shrugged. What were you supposed to do when your kid was pouting because you were arguing with your lifelong bitter rival? Parenting books just didn't cover this stuff.
An awkward pause.
"Just make up and get it done with." Apollo suggested.
Athena grumbled, "You make us sound like one of those teenage couples."
Aphrodite looked up from the compact mirror in her hand, "Who, Poseidon and Athena?"
"No!" They yelped together. But it was too late. Once Aphrodite latched onto a couple idea, there was a slim chance she'd let go.
"Aww, they even talk together." Aphrodite cooed.
The Olympians watched as the three fought. It was quite amusing.
It was Athena who came up with a solution. (No surprises there.)
"Aphrodite?" Athena asked, sickenly sweet.
"Mhm?" Aphrodite was a little busy planning their wedding.
"Tell me, are you having a bad hair day?"
Her hand subconsciously reached up to her head. "No."
Suddenly Athena's mood changed. She snarled at Aphrodite. "Well, you're going to, if you don't stop this nonsense Right. Now."
Almost as if to emphasize her point, an owl with wickedly sharp claws flew into the room, perching on Athena's throne.
"And," Poseidon added conversationally, "if that's not enough, I have back-up options. Just out of curiosity, is your mascara water-proof?"
Beside him Hermes heard Dionysus mutter, "Curiosity, my ass."
Hermes had to resist a sudden urge to laugh.
Aphrodite's face paled.
"Good." Athena said satisfied. "Are we clear?"
She nodded, terrified.
"So," Zues broke in, "back to the meeting?"
Imeddiantly a flurry of words broke out.
"Mother Rhea likes me best!"
"My children are way better than your Hunters at archery!"
"Can I get out of that blasted camp early?"
Hermes sat back contently in his throne when a tug on his pants made him look down.
Ami had slipped down unnoticed. How she survived the fall from the seat of Poseidon's throne to the floor, he had no idea.
"Hey," he said, lifting her up.
She giggled. "I'm bored."
"Well then, let's go play."
No one noticed when the two slipped out and got Chinese.
*I suck at nicknaming. 'Nough said.
Meh. I thought it wasn't half bad. A whole frickin' week for this. Be happy.
Love? Hate? What'cha think?
Review by clicking the button there. Music, out. :)
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