Season 4 premiere episode:
The Rebellion Party
The cold opening: Michael walks into the office. He walks over to reception.
Michael: Hello, Pam.
Pam: Michael, where have you been? It's already 12:00 in the afternoon.
Michael: Uh, I've just been...um...(laughs and looks at the camera) I was just doing some business. Don't worry about it Pam, it's confidential.
Pam: Okay.
Michael: Very confidential...
Pam: Okay.
Michael: (shouts it out quickly) I was having sex with Jan.
Pam: Oh...
Michael: Her breasts are amazing. (cups his hand if he were holding Jan's boobs) They feel so nice--
Pam: (grossed out) Oh! Okay. (softly) I didn't need to know that.
Michael: There're just so big and fit perfectly in my hands.
Pam is disgusted and looks at the camera.
Pam: Andy called this morning and said he won't be here today. He has the flu.
Michael: Oh he does? That sucks, tell him I hope he feels better. Do I have any messages?
Pam: No.
Michael: Really? It's been like three hours...three long hours--
Pam: Okay, Michael...
Michael: All right, I'll be in my office. Call me if you need me.
Pam: Yeah.
Act 1
scene--The camera focuses on an empty desk. It reveals to be Karen's. The camera shows Jim back at his old desk where he sat in seasons 1 and 2. The desk he sat in during season 3 is no longer there. The camera then focuses on Jim and Pam who are working at their desks.
Talking head
Jim: I'm back at my old desk. It feels good to be back, I sorta missed it. Uh, a lots happened during the summer. I'm still here, so I obviously did not get the job. Also, Karen and I broke up. Things didn't work out between us. She no longer works here. The last I've heard from her is that she's living in New York and has a job at corporate. She didn't get the job David Wallace interviewed us for instead, she got another position which was offered to her.
scene--Pam is at her desk. She looks at her computer and finds that she received an e-mail. She opens it and laughs, then looks at Jim who is waiting for her response.
Pam: You've got to be kidding me. 10 things not to do with your boss?
Jim: You think I should send one to Michael?
Pam: I think it's too late. Jan's not his boss anymore.
Jim: (thinks about it) I'll do it anyway.
Jim and Pam share a laugh.
Talking head
Pam: No, Jim and I aren't dating. We're still friends. We've decided that it would be best to take things slow. We really don't want to mess this up. Jim and I are just trying to rebuild our friendship before we take that big step. I'm totally fine with it. Our friendship is what I really need right now.
scene--Michael's office: Michael's phone rings. He turns on the speaker phone.
Michael: Yes?
Pam: Michael, Ryan's on the phone.
Michael: Oh okay, put him on.
Ryan: (on the phone) Michael.
Michael: Hey you, how's it going? We miss you. (to the camera) That's my guy!
Ryan: I'm fine Michael. Michael, I will be stopping by to go over some things with you.
Michael: Okay, just like old times.
Ryan: No, not like old times. Now that I've taken over Jan's job, I have decided to change a couple of things around the office that will best be suited for the company.
Michael: All right, cool. Hey, do you want to hang out afterwards too?
Ryan: No Michael.
Michael: Are you sure? It will be fun. We could like maybe go to Hooters together or something.
Ryan: No Michael. I'm just going to come in and come right out.
Michael: That's what she said. (laughs)
Ryan: (sighs) Michael. I'll be there in a little bit. Don't leave the office.
Michael: Yes temp, I mean boss. (laughs)
Ryan abruptly hangs up the phone, similar to what Jan use to do.
Michael: (smiles at the camera) I taught him well.
commercial break...
scene--the break room: Oscar, Meredith, Kevin, and Creed are eating their lunches. They are also discussing about Ryan becoming Michael's new boss.
Oscar: I can't believe it either. The temp has Jan's job. It's crazy.
Kevin: Yeah, I wonder how Michael's going to act around him now.
Meredith: He's probably going to end up sleeping with him too.
Oscar and Kevin look at her. Awkward silence.
Meredith: What? I know you were all thinking it.
Creed: I know I was.
Talking head
Creed: There's nothing wrong with two men having sex. I use to see it all the time when I was still touring. I have some sketches if you ever want to see them.
scene--Michael's office: Dwight is talking to Michael.
Dwight: What do you mean Ryan's coming here?
Michael: He is and I'm excited. I haven't seen him a while. We're going to hang out later tonight too.
Dwight: (disappointed) Oh. Do you want me to tag a long so I can escort you?
Michael: No Dwight, you're not going with us.
Dwight: Is Andy going? Wait, he's not even here today.
Michael: He's out sick, he has the flu.
Dwight: Oh he has the (air quotes) "flu" does he? Do you want me to investigate?
Michael: No, just... you're not going.
Dwight: Oh... Well, I don't think Ryan deserved that job. You deserved it Michael.
Michael: Shut it. You're just saying that because you wanted my job. Besides, there was no way I was going to take my girlfriend's job, no way.
Dwight: I respect your decision.
Michael: Good. (excitedly) I can't wait till Ryan gets here! We're going to have so much fun. This will be nothing like having Jan as a boss. We're going to have tons of corporate parties and we'll hang out a lot...
Dwight: What makes you think that will happen?
Michael: Why not? I practically taught Ryan how to manage in business, he's going to rule at this job.
Dwight: You didn't teach him how to manage in business, he goes to business school.
Michael: O.K. Dwight, you can leave now. Ryan's going to show up any minute. I don't need you ruining the mood. I'll call you back when Ryan's here so you can get us some coffee or something.
Dwight: Yes, Michael.
Talking head
Dwight: Do I have any problem with not getting Michael's position? No. Michael is the best boss I could ever ask for and I will serve him till the day he dies...unless I am offered the position again, then I no longer have to serve him. If Ryan ever decides to fire Michael and hire me, I will offer Michael a job as a salesman. That is the least I can do for a great man like Michael Gary Scott.
scene--Ryan walks through the door.
Pam: Hi Ryan.
Ryan: Hi Pam, is Michael still here?
Pam: Yeah, he's waiting for you in his office.
Ryan: (nervous/uneasy. He just doesn't want to see Michael because he's afraid of what Michael will do... to him.) Waiting? Okay...thank you Pam.
Ryan heads for Michael's door but instead is stopped by Dwight who stands in front of it.
Dwight: Temp.
Ryan: Excuse me Dwight, I need to talk to Michael.
Dwight: About what?
Ryan: Business, please sit back down.
Dwight: Woah temp, it's good to finally see you with some authority. I like it.
Ryan: Thanks, now please move out of the way.
Dwight: (grabs his head and gives him a nogie) Haha, temp!
Ryan: Dwight, stop!
Ryan is clearly uncomfortable.
Dwight: Haha.
Michael comes out of his office after hearing the commotion.
Michael: Hey, what's going on?! (sees Ryan in a headlock) Dwight! Let go of him!
Dwight lets go. Ryan fixes his hair, but it's still a little messy.
Michael: What are you doing Dwight?
Dwight: I was just messing with him.
Ryan: Michael, can we go inside your office? Now?
Michael: Of course. (to Dwight) Go back to work Dwight. Don't nogie the temp. (looks at the camera) Oh, I mean the boss.
They both go inside Michael's office. Dwight sits back at his desk.
Michael: So how do you like your new job?
Ryan: It's good.
Michael: Don't you think it's funny that you haven't even made a sale but you still got the job?
Ryan: Michael, I came here to talk to you about some rules.
Michael: Rules? What kind of rules?
Ryan: When I was still working here, you had a very unorthodox way of managing this office. Now that I'm your superior, I think it's my job to set some ground rules for you.
Michael: Ryan, come on... You're suppose to be the cool boss. You're turning out to be like Jan. (to the camera) Not that Jan was not a cool boss, she was a very cool boss...but not fun, kinda strict.
Ryan: First off, you are only allowed to have only one office party a year.
Michael: What? Only one? What about birthday parties?
Ryan: No.
Michael: Ryan, man... don't do this.
Ryan: I just did.
Michael: This isn't going to sit well with the rest of the workers here.
Ryan: Oh, I'm sure they'll be fine.
Michael: Come on Ryan, just one?
Ryan: Second, you can no longer make inappropriate comments in the office.
Michael: They're only jokes. They're not hurting anybody.
Ryan: I'm going to have Toby report every complaint to me.
Michael: Toby? If you're taking away my comedic material, you might as well fire Toby because he makes everything not funny.
Ryan: Michael, if these complaints keep happening, I will have to give you a warning. If you have more than three warnings, I will be forced to release you from your job.
Michael: What? You're going to fire me just for saying that's what she said?
Ryan: Not exactly what I said--
Michael: No, I know exactly what you said. How come I never heard you complain about this before? I thought you liked it? Now, you're a party pooper. What did David Wallace do to you?
Ryan: He did nothing. And yes, I have complained about you dozens of times...to Toby in fact.
Michael: I thought you were my friend.
Ryan: I'm your boss, I'm not your friend.
Michael: You've changed Ryan. You've changed a lot. If I knew you felt this way about me before, I wouldn't have taken you under my wing and taught you my ways.
Silence.
Ryan: I will be checking back very often. I'm having Toby keep an eye on you.
Michael: Well, that's... great.
Ryan: Do you have any questions?
Michael: Whatever.
Ryan: O.K.. Thank you Michael.
Michael: Well, you're not welcome.
Ryan leaves his office. Jim turns around and talks to him.
Jim: Hey man.
Ryan: Hey Jim.
Jim: So how does it feel to go from being a temp, to a saleman, to Michael's boss.
Ryan: It feels good. This feels more like my league.
Jim: (surprised) Oh.
Ryan: No offense.
Jim: It's cool. Well, it was nice to see you again.
Ryan: Yeah same here.
Ryan waves to Pam.
Pam: Bye Ryan.
Talking head
Michael: (angrily) I cannot believe Ryan. You know, he had so much potential to be my best friend but he's totally not my friend anymore. He's clearly forgotten our friendship. I should have spotted this sooner. I still had high hope for him, even though he viewed our company as a failing business. After all of that, I still forgave him. So what if I moved him to the annex, I still had high hopes. How did he even get the job anyway? He probably told Wallace that DunderMifflin was the best paper company ever. Yeah, that's what probably got him the job. That liar...
commercial break...
Act 2
scene--Michael is at the front door of his office. He calls for a meeting.
Michael: Attention everybody! I don't know if you already know this, but Ryan the temp is now my boss, and yours. He has made some very, uncool rules. Sadly, we will no longer have parties in this office. All we will ever do in this office is work. Yuck. All work and no play. I know, I know, you all must be heartbroken...cause I am too.
Dwight: I'm heartbroken about it too Michael.
Michael: Just shut it. We will only have one party per year. So the party planning committee will no longer have the fun job of planning parties anymore. This is a very very sad day for us.
Jim: No more parties?
Michael: No more parties Jim...
Jim: I'm sorry Michael. I was looking forward to having that "End of September" party at the end of the month.
Michael: Don't worry Jim, we'll figure something out.
Talking heads
Pam: I'm totally fine with not having to plan a party every two weeks. I understand... this is only for the best. (smiles)
Phyllis: At least I don't have to deal with Angela as much anymore.
Angela: How do I feel about this as head of the planning committee? Shocked.
scene--Jim and Pam are in the kitchen eating lunch together.
Jim: So are you sad about not having to plan anymore parties?
Pam: Very. I no longer have a purpose of being a receptionist.
Jim: (laughs) Wow, you're taking it harder than Michael.
Pam: I am, it's going to take some time to cope.
Jim: Well Pam, if you ever need a shoulder to cry on...
They both laugh and smile at each other.
Pam: Hey, do you want to go out for dinner tonight?
Jim: Yeah sure. You're paying this time.
Pam: Why?
Jim: You're the one asking me out to dinner so, I think you should also be the one thats paying.
Pam: Fine. Then I get to pick the location too.
Jim: O.K., where to?
Pam: My apartment.
Jim: Uh, let me guess...pizza?
Pam: No, Chinese.
Jim: Hmm...O.K., takeout it is.
Kelly walks in.
Kelly: Was Ryan here today?
Jim: Yeah, he was earlier.
Kelly: You know, he hasn't even called me after he got this job.
Pam: I thought you guys broke up?
Kelly: We did.
Jim: Then why are you expecting him to call you?
Kelly: To talk Jim, duh...
Jim and Pam give each other a confused look.
scene--Michael's in his office talking to Dwight.
Michael: We are going to have party whether Ryan likes it or not.
Dwight: We are?
Michael: Yes.
Dwight: What's the party going to be about?
Michael: A rebellion party...no, a toga party. Those are so much fun.
Dwight: I don't think Toby's going to let us have one.
Michael: Pshh! Weren't not going to invite him.
Dwight: But he works here.
Michael: Then...we'll just lock him out of the office.
Dwight: How are we going to do that?
Michael: Just let me take care of that. Tell, the planning committee to meet in the conference room to start planning a party.
scene--The Conference room: Angela, Pam, Phyllis, and Dwight are having a meeting.
Pam: Tell us again what exactly we are planning for?
Dwight: Some sort of a rebellion party.
Phyllis: How are we going to do that?
Angela: Yeah, we don't even have the materials. This is just too soon.
Dwight: You have to do this for Michael.
Angela: But there's no reason to have a party at the last minute.
Dwight: Yes there is.
Dwight and Angela look at each other angrily.
Phyllis: What's going on?
Dwight: Just plan a party, anything.
Dwight leaves. Angela glares at him as he leaves.
Pam: O.K., let's plan a rebellion party. Do you guys have any ideas?
Angela: This is stupid.
Phyllis: At least we agree on that one.
scene--Michael stands outside his office to address his workers.
Michael: At 5 o'clock, we will be having a party. The planning party committee is planning for it as we speak.
Jim: Why are we having a party?
Michael: Because it's not fair that Ryan is not letting us have more than one party this year, so we're rebelling, like what the slaves did on the Amistad; right Stanley?
Stanley: I'm on the phone.
Jim: No, Michael it's not. They did not rebel by throwing a party.
Michael: If they wanted to, they could have. Party on the ship.
Jim: (looks at the camera) No.
Michael: The theme we're going for is a rebellion party. So nobody leave after work because you're going to miss out.
Kevin: I have a doctor's appointment after work.
Oscar: Yeah, and I have someone coming in town later today.
Michael: Well, then I'm sorry you can't leave.
Oscar: Why not?
Michael: Because this party is mandatory.
Kevin: But Michael, I can't stay.
Michael: Just re-schedule your appointment.
Kevin: I can't, my doctor's book this week.
Michael: Then...get a different doctor Kevin.
Oscar: I'm not staying.
Michael: Yes you are Oscar, you have to.
Oscar: I told you, I have someone coming over.
Michael: Tell your friend to wait for you at home. Can't he wait?
Oscar: I'm having a female friend come over.
Michael: A female friend? Wait, I thought you were gay? You're not anymore?
Oscar: She's a family friend Michael.
Michael: Sure. You can have gay sex with her next time Oscar.
Jim: Michael, I don't think this is such a good idea.
Michael: Not the attitude we want with this party. We're going to stick it to the man... but no one tell Ryan.
commercial break...
Act 3
scene--It's 5'clock and the camera pans over the room to show the lack of decorations up on the wall. There is a one piece of computer paper that says "REBELLION PARTY" with a red marker. It's not very decorated and neither is the office. In the conference room, the table is pushed to the side with food that looks like it has been taken out from the fridge, and vending machine. Everyone is standing around being bored, and wanting to go home.
Michael: O.K.. Dwight, get out the boom box and play some music.
Dwight: I don't have a boom box.
Michael: Do I have to do everything around here?
Michael heads to his office and goes to his computer. He turns up the volume of his computer and blasts Beastie Boy's "You've got to fight for your right to party."
Michael: There!
Michael leaves his office and leaves his door wide open so the music can be heard. No ones impressed.
Michael: O.K. guys, let's party!
Toby comes out from the kitchen. He's about to go home, but stops to find out exactly what's going on.
Toby: Michael, why are you blasting music from your office?
Michael: That's none of your business Toby.
Toby: And why is everyone still here? Shouldn't they all be leaving? It's already 5:20 pm.
Michael: Don't worry about it. Just go home.
Toby: (looks at the party poster on the wall) A rebellion party? Michael, didn't Ryan tell you that you aren't allowed to have more than one office party? We just had your birthday party a while ago.
Michael: We're rebelling Toby, and you're not even invited to our party so, you can just leave.
Toby: I can't leave, I'm not letting you have this party.
Michael: O.K., I didn't want to do this, but you're making me do it.
Michael takes Toby's coat and bag away from him. They tug for it but Michael eventually wins. Michael takes his things and throws them out the door.
Michael: You made me do it Toby.
Toby: Ryan's not going to be happy about this.
Michael: Of course he's not, that's why we're rebelling. Just leave Toby.
Toby walks out. Everyone is silent.
Michael: He's not invited. O.K., let's have some fun!
He starts to dance to the music and Dwight starts to join him but Angela gives him a look and stops.
Michael: Come one guys, this is a rebellion party, we're suppose to be having fun.
He notices that no one is having any fun.
Michael: What's wrong guys, we're having a party!
Stanley: We all want to go home Michael.
Everyone agrees.
Michael: I don't get it. I throw this fun party for you guys and you all want to go home?
Angela: We all have lives after work you know.
Michael: Oh... Well then... If you all feel that way, just leave. We'll have no more parties, like what Ryan wants...
He sadly go to his office and shuts the door. Everyone begins to leave. Jim and Pam look concerned and decide to talk to him.
Jim: (knocks on Michael's door) Michael...it's Jim.
Pam: And Pam.
Michael: You guys don't have to stay, you can leave.
Jim: No. Uh, we just want to talk.
Michael: (sighs) Come in.
Pam: Michael, are you O.K.?
Michael: No Pam. (begins to choke up) I just wanted everybody to have fun. This was suppose to be a fun rebellion party.
Pam: But Michael, today just wasn't a great day for a party. It's been a long day, we all wanted to go home.
Jim: Yeah. We all love your parties Michael, it just this rebellion party... wasn't such a good idea.
Pam: Yeah.
Michael: You guys are right. I just threw this party because I was mad at Ryan. Can you believe he told me that he use to complain about me to Toby? It feels like I've just been stabbed in the back...and it hurts like getting kicked in the balls.
Jim: Wow. (looks at the camera)
Pam: I'm sure it does Michael. (smiles and looks at Jim.)
Michael: He was suppose to be a fun boss not a bitch.
Jim: O.K...
Pam: Uh, if it makes you feel any better...I'll stay for your party Michael.
Jim: Yeah, I'll stay too Michael.
Michael: No that's O.K. guys. You can go home. Go home together if you want to.
Jim and Pam are uncomfortable...
Jim: Are you sure Michael?
Michael: (pulls himself together) Yeah, I'm good. Thanks guys. I'm glad that I still have friends in this office.
Jim and Pam smile.
Pam: Will you be O.K.?
Michael: I am. Now go. Go home.
Jim: O.K. Michael, take care.
Pam: Bye Michael.
Michael: Bye guys.
Jim and Pam leave.
Talking head
Michael: You know, my friendship with Ryan is over. He wasn't even a cool person anyway. So what if he was hot and good looking. I have other friends. I don't need Ryan. If I saw him hitch hiking down the road, I wouldn't pull over. I would pass him, and not look back. He lost his chance to be my friend, and that's just too bad. Ryan's got a lot to learn about the world. I've been in this world longer than he has, and I've seen a lot, experienced things that people should not have experienced. Ryan's young. Even though I don't need Ryan, I know he needs me. Sadly, I won't be able to give him what he needs. That's his fault and he's just going to have to deal with that for the rest of his life. When Ryan becomes an old man, he'll look back one day and say "Wow, I really should have stayed friends with Michael. He was a really nice guy, but I blew it. Now my world sucks because he wasn't in my life." Yeah... it's a shame...
tag scene:
scene--Ryan's office at New York: His assistant gives him a big yellow envelope.
Ryan: Thank you.
Ryan opens it up and stares at what's in the inside of the envelope.
Ryan: You've gotta be kidding me...
Ryan pulls out a burnt cheesy pita. He scans it and finds a note attached to it.
Ryan: (he reads it) Don't burn down the building fire guy. Michael Scott.
He looks at the camera with disbelief.
The End