Narrator: At last, after a hard day at work, our band of feline felons... I mean, heroic hero... ers... can relax!
So many pizza deliveries... Speedy and Good Bird muttered together, each slumped against the wall.
Honestly, sure, you each delivered about 2,350 pizzas, sure you guys broke a world record by doing that, sure you were each run over, but I thought you could do better after work! Polly chided.
Still, I likes alls thes moneys wes mades. Francine added. Oh, happy day!
Narrator: And then, Guido turned on the boob tube.
shouted Guido.
Narrator: Okay, that's it. I quit. Well, no. I still like making fun of you morons.
yelled Good Bird. Me are no moron! Me are know 1 1 0!
Narrator: Exactly.
Then, an advertisement appeared on the TV:
Are you tired of trying to pour hot water for your pasta and burning yourself?
The Big Cheese was on it, pouring some H to the O. Dum dee dum dee du- AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!! IT'S LIKE MY EYES AND MOUTH ARE MELTING!!!!!!
Then try the amazing Pasta Wow Pot! No, it's not actually the same pot that that idiot just used painted a different color! You can get the amazing Pasta Wow Pot for the low low price of $19.95, plus a dollar for each dollar, and S to the H.
I wanna buy it! shouted Speedy.
Speedy, we don't cook pasta, here. Polly said. We simply go to All Your Pasta Are Belong To Us and eat there.
I still want it!
Narrator: And now for something completely different.
It was late that night when Francine heard the scream. She carefully stepped outside in her nightclothes, trying to see what it was. Lighting a flashlight, she saw...
Who're you going to believe? asked Black Mage, holding a bloody knife handle, and blood all over his clothes. This dead freak, or me?
Narrator: And so, it was revealed that for a random reason, Black Mage, Fighter, Thief, Red Mage, and Garland had come to Little Tokyo from 8-bit Theater. Everybody quickly adapted to them.
Francine had a new love.
Oh, Thief! You and your massive overseas bank account are so lovable!
Keep away, non-elf heathen!
Good Bird made a new friend.
Thank you, Red Mage, for your ever useless store of knowledge!
The pleasure was mine. I now have stats in not only decorative cake frosting, but in teaching useless information as well!
Polly had found a new way to vent her anger.
Fighter died. Polly stopped. Fighter came back to life. Polly started. Fighter died...
Guido was having fun with Garland.
Garland! There's a forest imp near you!

And Black Mage found someone he deemed worthy of stabbity death.
Come back, you stupid feline f! shouted Black Mage.
Polly help me!
But then the Earth decided to kill itself, so it ran into the sun. But, CSI was on, so nobody noticed.