Hahahahahaha, I was bored. So, despite any OOCness there might be, I thought this would be a funny short story :DDD
Of course! Who would doubt that Tamaki was a jack of all trades?
The Host Club would, of course.
It was a short and straight to the point conversation. Tamaki, soaked in the glory of his popularity, began ranting on how he could become anything he wanted. The Host Club quickly pointed out that Tamaki could barely even do anything.
"Oh yeah," the blonde defended. "Well, I can be really, really, ridiculously good lookin--"
A sweatdrop appeared as Tamaki avoided that Zoolander quote copyright and as Haruhi said, "Something that actually requires skill, Sempai."
Now, what skills did Tamaki have? He was really, really, ridiculously good looking but that wasn't really a skill. Tama-chan could play the piano, but his lack of using this talent had made him forget he had it. Finally, a lightbulb appeared.
"I'm funny!" the idiot proudly proclaimed as if he had discovered something golden.
The Twins muffled a laugh, Mori gazed on, Hunny gave that 100 watt smile, Kyouya cocked an eyebrow and Haruhi proceeded with the standard double sweatdrop. Before Haruhi could comment on this new statement, Kyouya intruded.
"Alright then; we'll show off your lovely talent by holding a comedy night at the Host Club."
Kyouya would use any excuse to make money; even Tamaki's false hope of a sense of humor. Thus, that leads us to the scene at hand.
The Third Music Room was buzzing with the combination muffles of the young ladies and gentlemen of Ouran Academy. All lights were off, except for one spotlight which was aimed at a brick wall with a microphone in front of it. Nervously standing in front of the brick wall was the Princely Type that created the whispering in the Host Club room.
"Hello everyone!" Tamaki smiled as the crowd clapped their hands off.
"Tonight I shall be doing some impressions; first, Borat."
After putting on a fake mustache, Tama-chan continued.
"Look there's a lady in a car! Can we follow her? And maybe make the sexy time with her?"
He stood there; no applause.
Ripping off the mustache, Tamaki quickly resumed, "Um... oo! Here's one of Dane Cook!"
The blonde proceeded to pace around the stage.
"Um, you know, you know I'm going to get married one day and I'm going to meet my bride's wife, um, my mother-in-law and she's going to be like 'Hi Dane how are you?' and then I'm going to, um, you know, punch her in the face and be like 'Now your face is broken!'"
Even more silence.
Pulling the collar of his shirt, Tamaki tried to save himself with a final attempt.
"Here's an impression of... HARUHI!"
Now, this had awakened Haruhi from her embarrassed gaze. What was he going to say?
"No, we can't go have fun; we must study! Study, study, study! Fashion? Who needs a sense of fashion when you have books and ootoro!"
The crowd let out a booming chuckle as Haruhi settled a glare onto Tamaki's person. Delighted by this scene, Hikaru and Kaoru commented in unison, "Wow, Haruhi, he--" but then they were interrupted by Tamaki's impression of them.
"Oh, Hikaru, please don't tell the ladies whatever lie it is now; then you'll have to hold me in a permiscuous position that screams 'MOE!' and a background of roses will appear!"
Changing into 'Hikaru' mode, Suoh responded to himself, "Who cares, Kaoru! Because we're both idiot jokers who don't respect our lord and how much he does for us. No girl would ever want us!"
Of course, Tamaki added his own twist. In addition to Haruhi's anger, came the Twins' bitterness.
Oh, but we must not forget Kyouya.
"Money, money, money! I love money so much that I wish I could marry it and have sexual relations in order to produce even more money! But I don't have time to do that because I'm have to schedule a time to be really anal and start writing random words in my notebook! I don't know why I don't get a Palm Pilot; my glasses make me look like I'd be interested in technology."
Kyouya was not amused. He opened his notebook, etching fuming notes while the crowd cheered even more.
Standing up straight and tall and masking himself in a stoic face mode, Tamaki became Mori.
"Mori sound like Hulk. Mori angry. Mori smash."
Even the stern face of Mori couldn't help but scowl a little. His beloved cousin tried to calm him down but then Tamaki created a Hunny impression.
"HARUKYOUYAHIKARUKAORUTAMA-CHAN! Let's eat cake! I don't care that I'm a senior who looks like a 9 year old LET'S SUPPORT PEDOPHILIA!"
Que Hunny's 'I'll beat you up' face... now!
Finally, the oblivious Prince decided to end his show on a light note.
"OHOHOHOHOHO! I'm an otaku who wears random cosplay outfits my Halloween one being incredibly short; enough to see my unmentionables! I like to install random engines around school and prop up and bug the crap out of everyone! My laugh sounds like I'm on death row and decided to laugh one villainess laugh before I kick the bucket! OHOHOHOHOHO!"
Luckily for Tamaki, Renge-chan wasn't there; cosplay convention. Anyway, everyone was still busting out of their seats with laughter and chanting, "ENCORE! ENCORE!"
The blonde bowed and smiled; the Host Club approached the stage. Before Tamaki could reply to the comment about an encore, he was whisked away by a huddle of pissed off Hosts.
All that could be heard was his curtled scream.
Let's just say that after that day, Tamaki didn't dare make fun of Borat again.
AH! Everyone is going to kill me for making fun of the Hosts O.o
Remember! I do it out of fun so please don't hurt me xD