Here For You
Padmé carried the mug of an herbal drink into the small room given to Anakin at the Lars homestead. She found him wide awake, sitting on the pallet-like bed, his long legs crossed. He stared straight at the white-washed wall. He looked disheveled, dressed only in his undershirt and pants, the rest of his clothing piled on the floor. His eyes were bloodshot.
The sight of it broke Padmé's heart. She may not be a Jedi but she could feel his anguish as thought it were her own.
Her nightdress was similar to the one she wore the night he killed the kowluns on her bed, but she no longer felt self-conscious. She went up to him and offered him the mug. "Beru made this for you, to help you sleep," she said.
He looked at her, muttering, "I don't want to sleep. I'm..."
"You're afraid to." She sat beside him on the bed.
He nodded, reluctantly.
"There's no shame in that," she said. "This is supposed to put you in a deep, dreamless sleep." She held the mug out to him. "Go on. You need rest for tomorrow."
"I don't know how I'm going to face it, saying goodbye to her forever," he said.
"She would want you to be strong," Padmé said. "Please?"
Anakin looked at the mug and took it from her. He took a sip and made a face. "Bitter," he said. He steeled himself and drank the rest of the brew.
Padmé took the empty cup from him and set it down on the floor. "Ani, do you want me to stay? Until you fall asleep?"
He looked confused and hesitant for a moment. Then he said, "All right." He lay down on the bed, the home brew starting to take effect. After he shut his eyes, Padmé gently drew up the covers over his body, up to his collarbone.
"Padmé," he muttered sleepily. "Please don't leave me. Stay..."
"I won't go anwhere, Ani. Just relax." Without thinking about it, she brushed back his short hair. She watched as he became still and his breathing became deeper. Padmé caressed his cheek. When he didn't stir, she knew he was asleep.
For a moment, she wondered about her promise to Anakin. She couldn't sleep on the hard dusty floor. There was nothing else she could sleep on. Yet she didn't want to leave him. If he awoke from another nightmare, he would need her. At the retreat, she nearly went to his bed after she'd heard him having nightmares, stopping herself because she'd just rebuffed him.
But things were different now and she was certain nothing untoward would happen.
Besides, a quiet voice confessed, I love him. I don't know if I could ever tell him, but it's true. She lay her slight body next to his and closed her eyes. Sleep overtook her just as she put an arm around him.