Bean Flavor Nonsense
Pairing: Hitomi x Lei Fang
Genre: Humor
Disclaimer: I do not own DOA or any of its characters.
Author's Note: This idea came from a Youtube video and yes. The Bean Boozled beans are definitely a real product and some of you may know this. If not, well, you've learned something new. Hehe~!
I would also like to thank my very good friend, Major Mike Powell III for hearing me out on chat. Your comments always motivate me~
Enjoy~
Hitomi is in her room reading a book when she hears a knock on the door. She gets up and opens it and sees her girlfriend Lei Fang greeting her with a happy smile.
"Hey, Hitomi!" The Chinese girl says. "Look what I got?" She holds up a small rectangular box.
"Jelly beans?" Hitomi questions.
"Not just any beans. They are called Bean Boozled Beans. They are beans with the same color, but some have different kinds of flavors. Like sweet flavor or disgusting flavor," Lei Fang explains.
Hitomi tilts her head in confusion. "Oooookay...elaborate, please?"
Lei Fang glances at the box. "Well for example, if you pick one bean, you can either taste Tooty Fruity or Stinky Socks. You can have Lime or Lawn Clippings. Or you can have peach or you can have barf."
Hitomi backs away waving her hands back and forth. "Eeewwww! I don't want to eat anything that tastes like vomit!"
The Chinese girl laughs. "Sorry, but that's how the company made it."
Hitomi sighs. "And why did you bring those over here...?"
"You and I are going to have some fun with them, that's why~!"
The German lets out a heavy sigh. Her lover can have such crazy ideas at times, like this one time where both of them had sex at the beach before a vollyball match against Kasumi and Ayane. Lei Fang had insisted that it was a perfect strategy to raise their Affinity Level, but it did not work out like Lei Fang hoped. Now, she wants Hitomi to eat some beans with crazy flavors.
"Fine...if you insist..." The German says.
"Hooray! Let's get started then!"
The two lovers head towards a small table in the middle of the room and sit across from each other. Lei Fang gets out the materials, such as the spinner and the box of different colored beans. She then hands the spinner to Hitomi.
"You first, my love~!" She says.
"Wh-why me!?"
"Just cause~"
"You're mean!"
Hitomi grabs the spinner and spins the arrow until it stops. She takes a look at where it pointed towards. "Let's see...Caramel corn or moldy cheese."
Lei Fang gestures her hand towards the box. "Well, pick one, Hitomi. You spun it, you pick it~"
Hitomi groans as she reluctantly digs in the box until she found a golden bean. "Oh, god. Well...here I go." She eats the bean and chews for a few seconds. However, she scrunches up her face at the taste. "Oh, no...It's bad. This is not good at all." She sticks her tongue out in disgust. "Ohhh, I don't think I picked the right color."
"What did you pick?"
Hitomi coughs. "I think I ate barf. Ahhh, god! That is disgusting! I gotta get some water or something!"
Lei Fang laughs as her girlfriend zips out of the room. "Ohhh, I love this~"
About five minutes later, Hitomi comes back with a bottle of water and sits back down. "Why would you make me do this freaking kind of crazy stuff!?"
"You know me, Hitomi~"
"I'm gonna clobber you afterwards." Hitomi hands the spinner to her. "Your turn."
"Gladly~" Lei Fang spins the spinner and it stops. "Lime or Lawn clippings."
She picks up a green jelly bean and eats it. In seconds, there is a happy smile on her face. "Yay! It's lime! Oh, it's so good!"
"You're kidding me!" Hitomi says, surprised that the Chinese girl got a good flavor in one try.
"Your turn~!" Lei Fang says as she hands her the spinner.
"No! No! I don't wanna eat another one! I ju...ahhh, crap!" Hitomi grabs the spinner and spins it. "Berry blue or toothpaste." She brightens at this. "Oh! This might be good! This might go a good way!"
"Are you sure~?" Lei Fang gives an evil grin. "You haven't even tasted them yet."
Hitomi picks up a light blue jelly bean. "Well it sounds like it can be a good flavor either way, so I'll eat it~"
She pops it in her mouth and chews it for a few seconds. She then gives a scrunched up face again. "It's toothpaste. It's not even NICE toothpaste!" She sticks her tongue out in disgust. "Ah...oh, it tastes like the dentist's! You know the stuff they spray in your mouth..."
"Yeah, yeah. i know." The Chinese girl says. She takes the spinner. "Now, it's my turn." She spins it. "Coconut or baby wipes."
Hitomi laughs. "Lei Fang, you better not have a good one this time. I tasted two bad flavors already."
"You'll never know if you taste it, right?" The Chinese girl picks up a white bean and eats it. And this time, it's her turn to make a disgusted face. "Baby wipes...it's freaking baby wipes! Ahhhh...god it tastes exactly as they smell!"
"Haha! Yeah, finally!" Hitomi cheers. "Sucks for you, Lei Fang!"
"Shut up..." The Chinese girl slides the spinner to her girlfriend. "Here. You go."
The German takes it and spins the spinner. Her eyes widen at where it stopped. "Juicy pair or booger!?" She digs in the box. "Ohhhhh, noooo. Aw, come on! Be a good one!" She picks up a light green bean. "Ah, it looks like a freaking booger as well."
She pops it in her mouth, chews on it for a few seconds and then makes a disgusted face while slamming the spinner down. "It's a booger. It's a freaking booger! I am the worst!" She holds her head with both hands while shaking it roughly.
Lei Fang bursts out laughing.
After drinking some more water she hangs down her head while putting both hands on it. "Oh, my god. That was the worst one so far! It tastes exactly like a booger!"
"You've tasted boogers before?" Lei Fang asks.
"I used to when I was a child, yes! I don't know anyone who wouldn't!"
Hitomi throws her the spinner. "Here. Your turn."
"Be nice, Hitomi."
"Then, why the Hell are we doing this!?"
"We're just having fun. Calm down."
Lei Fang spins the spinner. "Tooty fruity or stinky socks." She digs into the box again. "Hmmm...let's see. Wait, what is it again? Oh, I see it." She takes a pink bean and pops it in her mouth. "Eeeww! Stinky socks! Why!? Oh, god!"
Hitomi laughs. "You were the one who wanted to do this in the first place~"
"I know! Just be quiet and go." The Chinese girl hands her lover the spinner.
After spinning it, Hitomi groans as she grabs the box. "Liquorish or Skunk Spray." She picks up a dark bean. "Oh. I NEED a good one here! I need it!" She pops it in her mouth. Within seconds, she gags and coughs. "It's freaking skunk spray!"
Lei Fang bursts out laughing again as she watches her girlfriend roll around on the floor with her head inside her shirt.
After about a few minutes, Hitomi sits up and quickly sips on her water. "Oh, my god. That was so nasty! Oh, my god! It tastes like armpit! Cause you know, it's like sweaty armpits and it's disgusting!"
"Those beans sure don't like you, Hitomi~" Lei Fang teases.
"Shut up and go already!" The brunette slides the spinner to her.
Lei Fang spins the spinner. "Tooty fruity or stinky socks again. Welp, here I go. Hope to find a good one." She pops the bean in her mouth and seconds later, she smiles and throws her hands in the air. "Yaaay! Tooty fruity! Oh, it tastes so good~!"
Hitomi grabs the spinner and spins it. "Lime or Lawn clippings." She groans saying to herself. "It's gonna be lawn clippings, isn't it...?" However, when she pops it in her mouth, a bright smile appears on her face. "It's lime! Oh, finally! Something good~!"
Lei Fang scoots next to her and gives her a pat on the back. "After going through all that, you finally found a good one. Congratulations."
Hitomi hugs her girlfriend with a giggle. "So, are we done here? Are we finished?"
Lei Fang nods. "Yeah, let's take a break for a while. I'm getting sick of eating these, to be honest."
"Hey, that's my line."
Lei Fang just pecks her on the cheek. "Regardless of that, both of us tried something new. And that's never a bad thing."
"Yeah, you're right." Hitomi rests her head on her girlfriend's shoulder.
For the rest of the afternoon, the cute couple lay next to each other, having fun playing with each other's hair and giggling.
Hitomi found herself in another of Lei Fang's crazy adventures, but at the same time, that's what she loves about her.
The End