Author's Note: Slightly AU: Nothing happened with Lewis.

DISCLAIMER:

Dick Wolf owns these wonderful characters in which I love so much.

CHAPTER ONE Let Her Go

The door opens to the office with Olivia's push. She steps inside and takes in her surroundings. She sighs at the sight while closing the door behind her. Her coat isn't supposed to be on the coat rack, but it is. Her paperwork and files shouldn't be on the desk, but they are. She shouldn't be placing her keys on the desk, but she is. The coat hanger shouldn't be hers. The paperwork shouldn't be hers. The desk shouldn't be hers. The office shouldn't be hers. Everything should belong to her captain, Don Cragen. Instead it's hers-all of it. What isn't hers, is Captain Cragen, and she still hasn't become accustomed to that.

She takes a seat in the chair once belonging to Cragen and attempts to concentrate on the paperwork she knows needs to be completed. But as usual for the past few weeks, her focus deteriorates again. The words she stares at become foreign and incomprehensible. Her attention just hasn't been all there lately. For heaven's sake, she nearly killed herself by walking in front of taxi because she wasn't paying attention. It's as if she is living in her own separate world. Being unfocused is what will get others or herself killed during this job. She knows she wouldn't be able to live with herself if she caused someone's death simply because her mind was wandering. She covers her face with her hands and rubs her temples.

Normally, Olivia isn't the type to open up to anyone about what is going on in her mind, but she needs someone to talk to. And she has only one person left who would understand. She stands from the desk and begins to walk towards the door to open it as Detective Fin knocks on it. She nods in approval for him to come in.

"I was just going to call for you," she tells him once the door is shut again. She leans against the edge of the desk as he takes a seat in one of the chairs before her.

"Is everything okay?" he asks. She breaks eye contact and looks to the floor to try and gain enough composure to say yes. She opens her mouth as she looks up, but apparently 'yes' didn't come out because Fin asks with a worried look on his face, "Why? What's wrong, Liv?"

She shakes her head in disbelief that she's about to speak her mind, even to someone she trusts this much. "Everyone's gone," is all she manages.

"What do you mean?" he questions.

"Captain. Munch," she pauses, then whispers, "Elliot…" Her voice comes back to her, so she can finish explaining. "Everyone is gone. You and I are the only ones left. Am I next? Is the sign that it's time for me to leave?"

"I know, Liv. All of them leaving has been hard on me too. It's like I'm losing my family," he admits to her.

"Me too, Fin. Cragen was like a father to me. We were all like some dysfunctional family, and I… I don't know what I'm still doing here without my family." She inhales deeply to hold in the tears.

Fin stands from the chair and leans against the desk next to Olivia and places his hand on her shoulder. "I'm not planning on leaving anytime soon. Even without everyone else, I can't imagine leaving this job. But if I stay, I can't bear to lose you either. You're what holds this place together. You're our rock. Just keep holding on. You can always come to me if you need anything."

Olivia forces a smile. "Thanks, Fin." She pulls him into a quick hug.

"Anytime, Liv," he answers as he heads toward the door. He grabs the handle but before opening it, turns back to face Olivia. "You know, even the strongest are allowed to be weak sometimes, Olivia. You don't have to force yourself to go through everything alone. You may not have your dysfunctional family out there, but you've got your friends," he points out the window towards Nick Amaro and Amanda Rollins, "and they'd do anything for you."

She smiles again, without too much force this time, knowing Fin is right. She nods, and once again, she's left alone in her ex-captain's office.

Once the paperwork is finally completed, Olivia checks her phone which reads 9:34pm. She didn't realize she could spend hours on paperwork without feeling like she was ready to explode. She gathers up all the papers and orders them back in the files, then locks them away in the drawers of the file cabinet. A soft knock sounds on the door and Fin reenters. "You're still here? I didn't realize it had gotten so late. You could've left a long time ago." she tells him.

"It's okay. I had some of my own paperwork to finish from the last case. Everyone else is gone though. You should go home, Liv. You look exhausted," he responds with concern at the black circles forming around her eyes.

"Yeah. I'm getting ready to leave," she answers.

"How are you holding up?" he asks her.

"I'm fine. It's still pretty difficult being in this office without the reason being Cragen called me in," she admits. She zones out as Fin says something about missing him too.

"Maybe I should call him," she says once her mind returns to the present.

"Yeah, Liv. That's a good idea. But why don't you wait until tomorrow? It's getting late."

"It's not too late. I know he's still awake," she disagrees.

"It's going on ten. I'm sure he's catching up on all the sleep he missed because of this job. Let's just wait until morning, okay?" Fin tries to convince her as he ushers her out of the office and the precinct. She still hasn't agreed about waiting to call Cragen until morning by the time a taxi arrived for her. Fin is ready to make it a habit of waiting to leave until Olivia does, seeing how distracted she's been lately. Olivia opens the back door of the taxi, and breaks the silence. "Fin," she turns to look at him. "I'm not talking about Cragen," she finally says, then shuts the door before he has the time to ask her who she's talking about.

Thank you so much for reading the first chapter of my very first fanfic. Reviews mean a lot, positive or negative! I hope you enjoy the rest of the story!