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A/N: This series is going to move through interesting J/D moments that occurred or could have been starting with Noel, and continuing through the next few seasons. There are some dialogue bits from Noel in this chapter. Visit my archive: http://aerial312. .
Episode Timeline: Noel
5 DAYS BEFORE CHRISTMAS EVE. EARLY AFTERNOON.
"Would it be possible to hold the noise out here?!"
Donna paused in front of him. "Do you need something?"
"I…need the CBO spec."
"It's on your desk."
"It's like a hockey game out here." He slammed the door to his office.
Donna spun to look at the closed door, exchanging a quick look with CJ and Toby, who dispersed quickly. Donna backtracked and sat at her desk, rooting around through the scattered files, for the sandwich she had gotten him for lunch, that he hadn't had time for. She stood, crossing to his closed door, and paused before knocking. She took a deep breath, and knocked. Nothing. She knocked again.
Gingerly, she turned the knob, and stepped into the room, closing it quietly behind her. The light was off. He was sitting in his desk chair, facing the side wall, staring off into space. Donna stepped in toward his desk, laying down the sandwich, and pulling the CBO spec to the top of his pile. He didn't notice her. She leaned against the front of the desk, and just watched him for a minute. The door was doing little to keep out the Christmas cacophony.
"Josh?" she asked softly.
Nothing. He continued to stare at a random spot on the wall, blinking occasionally. Donna held her position.
"Josh?"
She didn't want to startle him, or crowd him, but cautiously she made her way into his line of vision and crouched in front of him.
"Josh?"
He blinked rapidly. "The spec?"
"On top here." Donna stood up and patted it.
"Oh." He spun to face his desk, his eyes unfocused.
"Here's your sandwich. You should eat a little."
"I…I'm not hungry."
"Well, if you change your—"
"I'm not going to change my mind!"
"Okay," Donna grabbed the sandwich off the desk.
"The spec—"
"Here."
"God, can't we do anything about the noise?! How am I supposed to concentrate—"
"I'll see what I can do."
"Please."
Donna crossed to the door. "Do you need anything else?"
"I need sometime to read this!"
"Okay." Donna slipped out the door, and back to her desk, shaking the mouse to wake up her computer. There was definitely something wrong with Josh, and she was determined to figure out how to help him.
5 DAYS BEFORE CHRISTMAS EVE. MID AFTERNOON.
Margaret sat typing a memo when Donna walked up to her desk.
"Do you think you might be able to find me 10 minutes in Leo's schedule?"
"For Josh?"
"For me."
Margaret gave her a questioning look, but only said, "He's free now. Just doing some reading. Go on in."
"Oh…okay. "
"Leo, Donna's here to see you," Margaret paged.
Donna hadn't expected to be able to see him right away and had been hoping to gather her thoughts a bit more. She knocked on the door.
"Come on in."
Donna entered Leo's office to find him in his chair, reading. He gestured for her to sit on the sofa.
"What can I do for you?"
She took a deep breath. "Have…have you noticed anything strange about Josh lately?"
"He's a little jumpy. Still getting back into the swing of things."
"Yeah…"
"Is he being terrible to you?"
"No…no more than – well, I can deal with his moods. But everyone's getting some of it. I'm worried about him, Leo."
"What else have you noticed?"
"Some of its little, some of its…more…"
"You're more attuned to him than most."
"Yeah."
"And these things?"
"He's snappy—more than usual. Noise is making him—its setting him on edge. He's not eating. He stares off into space. Earlier, I went into his office after he slammed the door, and he was just staring at the wall. But not really seeing it, you know? He didn't even see me at first. Then he finally snapped out of it, and stared yelling about the noise again."
"Oh, geez."
"I…I'm worrying about him, Leo."
"I know, kid."
"I looked up…his…symp—his behavior. He needs to talk to someone."
She handed him a packet of research she had done.
"ATVA?"
"He's never really dealt with it—he doesn't like to talk about it. I've never pushed him."
"Yeah."
"I think they might be a good starting point."
"I have a good contact there. I'll give him a call. Leave that for me to look over."
Donna nodded.
"How the hell did I miss this?"
"Like you said, I—"
"You notice things."
Donna nodded, as she left the office.
5 DAYS BEFORE CHRISTMAS EVE. LATE AFTERNOON.
The phone was ringing. Donna's head was in her filing cabinet. She slide her chair across the floor to answer the phone.
"Josh Lyman's office."
"Is this Donna Moss?"
She didn't recognize the voice. "Yes. How may I help you?"
"This is Stanley Keyworth. I work for ATVA—"
"Wow, Leo moved fast."
"He thought it was important. Is this a good time to talk?"
"I've got a few minutes while they're in staff."
"Good. You know why I'm calling?"
"Yes. Josh. When are you seeing him?"
"Christmas Eve."
"You're coming out on the holiday?"
"The holiday's the next day. And I have some family in Maryland."
"Well, we certainly appreciate you coming out here."
"I'm not sure Josh knows he'll be seeing me yet."
"I don't think so. Leo and I only spoke about it a few hours ago."
"Leo's gonna tell him."
"Okay."
"Now, you're Josh's assistant?"
"Yeah…"
"How long--?"
"Two years, in February."
"And what does your job entail?"
Donna chuckled.
"A little of everything?"
"Yeah. Filing, phones, memos, research, the usual…but lots that aren't in my job description…picking up dry cleaning, making sure he eats, being a sounding board, all that too, you know?"
"And you get along well?"
"Usually."
"You're close?"
"Yeah…"
"That's the second time you've hesitated. I have to ask: what is the extent of your relationship with Josh?"
She sighed. "He…its complicated. He's my boss, but he's also my best friend."
"Are your feelings stronger than that?"
"Is..is that important to your evaluation?"
"It could be."
"He's…it's really hard to explain…we're close…but the situation we're in…I don't know."
"And does he feel the same?"
"I thought he might…but, its really hard to tell. He's been so moody and distant since he got back to work."
"Which was how long ago?"
"A month."
"Okay. Tell me about the shooting. Were you there?"
"No."
"How did you find out?"
"I heard the President had been fired on. I didn't even think…until Toby told me at the hospital. Josh was already in surgery at that point."
"How did the next few weeks go?"
"I took a week off, and stayed with him as she recovered. His mom came into town, but she didn't have the strength to see him in pain…"
"And you did?"
"I could hide it better. He needed encouragement. So I didn't let him see me upset."
"I see."
"I went back to work half days. He got out of the hospital after two weeks. It eventually came back full time, but I'd still bring him lunch and dinner."
"Did you stay with him?"
"Yeah."
"For how long?"
"Till he came back to work."
"Okay."
"And now, Leo says, you're the one who really noticed his behavior?"
"He's just seemed off, you know? Jumpy. Terrible moods, can't bear noise around: all of the Chrismas musicians playing in the lobby have driven him nuts. There's been this thing with a pilot that he's caught up on. Hopefully the cello won't been as aggravating. We're seeing Yo Yo Ma tonight."
"Yeah?"
"Congressional Christmas Party."
Donna spied CJ and Toby chatting in the hallway, glancing back towards her.
"Stanley, I have a feeling staff has let out. If you need to talk to me again, he's in a meeting at 6."
"Thank you. I may call you back."
Donna hung up the phone, and gathered memos from her desk from Josh to sign. She went into his office, laying things out on the desk. She was scribbling a note on her clipboard when she heard the door slam. Josh charged into the room, nearly colliding with her. He looked up before continuing to his chair.
"Sorry, I was just organizing…"
Josh had buried his head in his arms on the desk.
"Do you need…?"
"I…I just…in the Oval..." he didn't look up.
When he didn't continue, Donna crossed to his side. "What happened in the Oval?"
"I'm surprised you didn't hear about it," he huffed dryly, flopping back against his chair and closing his eyes.
Donna thought back to CJ and Toby eyeing her. "What happened?"
"I…I don't even fucking know…I don't…know."
"But it was bad?"
He nodded, without opening his eyes.
"Did you yell?"
"I don't know!" He flung himself forward, tapping his forehead against the desk.
"Stop that."
"If I want to—"
"Stop it!"
Donna sat on the desk, facing him.
Josh sat up straight suddenly, and looked at her sadly. "I…can you…I need you to…look something up for me."
"What do you need?" Donna readied her clipboard.
"Don't…don't write it…"
Donna looked at him, lowering the clipboard.
"Find me…everything you can..about ATVA."
"Okay."
"You know what that stands for?"
"Yeah."
"Oh…" he sighed. "The bagpipes stopped."
"They were only scheduled till 3."
"Seems like they were here for days."
"Yeah?"
He nodded, closing his eyes. "They…" he trailed off, flopping himself forward again. He forgot that Donna was sitting on his desk though, and his head landed on her thigh. He didn't move. Hesitantly, Donna patted the back of his head.
"You're gonna have to clear my schedule for Christmas Eve."
"Okay. Why?" Best to play dumb.
"I…have a…meeting. Leo said clear the whole day."
Silence. It became clear he wasn't going to be more forthcoming than that. Josh sat up and fumbled through his papers.
Donna slid off the desk. "I'll have that info for you by the time you get back from your 6 o'clock. Sign these."
Josh nodded.
"Your tails will be waiting for you then too."
"That damn party."
"It'll be fun. Yo Yo Ma."
"Yeah…"
"Do you need anything else?"
"I've gotta call back…"
"I'll be at my desk."
"Yeah…"
Donna turned and walked to the door. "Open or closed?"
"Closed."
"Okay."
"Your hand."
"It's nothing."
"Josh."
"We've been over this."
"You're favoring your left hand."
"It's a cut."
"Josh."
"What!?"
"I wish you'd let me see it."
"I wish you'd mind your own business!"
Donna sighed. "You need to call back Congressman Willet before your, uh, meeting."
"Okay."
"Do you want anything else before…? Coffee? Snack?"
"I'm fine. Go put me through to the Congressman."
Donna nodded, crossing to her desk.
"Donna…" She spun around. He was standing in his doorway. "Come here."
"What's up?"
He grabbed her wrist and pulled her into his office, shutting the door. "Call the Congressman from my phone."
"Josh?"
He paced in front of his desk while she dialed. "Who's that woman?"
"Which—?"
"You know which one."
"That's Kaytha. She's with, uh, your meeting."
"Oh. Is—"
"Josh Lyman's office calling for the Congressman. Thanks, Karen."
The line clicked over to Jingle Bells while Karen put the line through. She handed him the phone, and headed for the door.
"Closed?"
Josh didn't answer. He was holding the phone awkwardly, staring at the phone.
"Are you still holding?"
Donna walked back to him, taking the phone from his hands.
'Oh, what fun it is to ride in a one horse—'
"Oh, Congressmand. I apologize. Let me put Josh on."
Donna clasped her hand over the receiver, and squeezed Josh's arm.
"Can you take this?"
He looked up at her, dazed. She squeezed his arm again.
"Congressman Willet."
"On the line?"
Donna nodded, and Josh took the phone.
"Congressman."
"You have 15 minutes," Donna whispered.
"Sir, I understand that it's Christmas Eve. I—yes, sir. Okay. But I want to talk to you the day you get back." He hung up the phone. "That was a waste of time."
"I wonder why he bothered to call you back. Sorry."
"I didn't really want to talk to him anyways. By agreeing to wait until after his holiday, he'll vote for the bill."
Donna smiled. That was more like Josh. "Anything else?"
"The woman…Kay…"
"Kaytha. She's…observing."
"Is she…?"
"She's with a guy. He's in talking to Leo."
Josh nodded. "We'll be in the small conference room. If I get any important calls…"
"Only the most important."
Josh sighed, and reached out to grab a folder off his desk with his right hand. He yelped in pain.
"Are you okay?"
"Fine. I'm fine."
Donna leaned against his desk, watching him with concern.
"Really, Donna," he softened a little. "It's not that bad…"
Donna grasped his injured hand gently. "Maybe later, I…?"
"Maybe." Josh looked at the ground.
They stood in silence for a minute, Donna cradling Josh's injured hand in hers.
"You should head up to your meeting."
"Don't worry about my hand."
"Do you want your jacket?"
"Yes."
She held it out for him, and they stepped into the hallway.
"I'm gonna walk up with you…see if they want coffee."
Josh nodded. "Should be ask my shadow to just follow us there?"
"She'll come."
"Yeah…"