Ok, this is a fic after charmed and dangerous. I'm terribly sorry I haven't written in a while, it's just I had a teeny tiny accident and haven't been able to move very well. I got hit by a car and the right side of my body paralyzed, it was a temporary thing, I mean, I can move now, although it still hurts a lot to do so. So please be kind, it took me a lot to write this. I'll be going back to Ben and vampire chronicles as soon as I can move completely.
Also, the capitals refer to the thing inside of Cole, a.k.a., the source speaking within him.
He had been acting different since they had come home, he was more distant, like closed out. She watched as he slept. He looked so peaceful Phoebe thought, but she knew that it wasn't like that, she knew that something was going on in his head, something that had made him shut her down when she asked if he felt alright and he just responded he was tired, something that had made him reject her compliment about him being her hero, something that had made him tense up when she hugged him, there was just something there.
She had responded to his being tired and suggested going home, "whatever" was all he said. She walked towards Paige and interrupted her little flirting session, "Paige, do you mind if we take the car, we're a little tired" she said, "how will I get home?" Paige asked, the man she had been talking to interrupted, "I can take you" he said, Paige smiled happily at him and nodded to Phoebe, handing her the keys.
She walked back to Cole who was sitting at the table, swirling his finger in his whisky, "got the keys" she said sweetly, jingling them in front of him. He nodded and got up, walking straight past her and up the stairs, she watched and quickly ran after him, it wasn't until after he was out in the parking lot that she ran up to him and confronted him about his sudden attitude, "hey, wanna wait up?" she asked, he turned to her and mumbled something as he extended his hand to take the keys from her, "wait, not until you tell me what's wrong" she said hiding them behind her back. "what do you mean what's wrong?" Cole said, already frustrated at this feeling inside of him, like something was blazing to come out, like some sort of wicked illness that was ready to erupt at any time. "something's wrong, tell me" she said concerned. "Nothing's wrong, I'm just tired" he said avoiding her stare, why was he avoiding her stare? HE wasn't avoiding her stare, something inside of him was avoiding her stare, why couldn't he gain control? What the hell was going on? "Cole… talk to me, please" she pleaded. "I am, nothings wrong, ok? Just drop it" he said angrily as he yanked the keys from her, she looked amazed at his outburst and watched as he got in and started the car, he than lowered the passenger window and looked at her, "you plan on getting in anytime soon?" he said madly. She felt like weeping, but she pulled it together, she opened the door and settled in the seat. The drive home was silent, she didn't say a word, neither did he. He just stared directly at the road.
What was wrong with him? Why did he act like this? Was he having doubts? What the hell was going on? Phoebe asked herself, his harsh tone ran around her head, she tried to understand, but she couldn't. The ride ended soon enough and she found herself desperate to get out of the car, to run and cry in her bed, but her bed was his bed too, was this the monster that she had to share the rest of her days with? But he wasn't like this, he was never like this.
She quickly got out of the car and ran inside the house, just wanting to get away from him, she couldn't take it. She ran up to her bedroom and locked the door, she just didn't want to be with him right now, not now.
Cole sat in the car and watched as Phoebe fled out of the car and into the house, what had he done? Why had he talked to her like that? What made him scream at her? He Never screamed at Phoebe, he loved her to much. He knew that something was wrong, something was wrong with him, ever since the seer had summoned him he had a bad feeling, but she couldn't have done anything, it wasn't in her power, now if the source were alive, he would have suspected something, but he was dead. The source was dead, it even seemed strange to think it. He cleared his throat and quickly pulled himself back together and got out of the car. He walked slowly to the house trying to delay his moment of groveling. He now seemed to be in total control, the thing that had made him scream at Phoebe wasn't there, he wondered what it was, maybe it was a split personality, like when he had Balthazor. But he wasn't a demon anymore, he was a man, maybe a schizo.
He walked slowly up the stairs treading lightly and soon enough he reached the door of their bedroom. He reached for the door and turned the knob, it was locked. "Phoebe, open up" he said, he was ready to beg if it was necessary.
NO, BUT WHY THE HELL SHOULD HE BEG??? What the hell? What was that sudden thought that popped into his head. Was it him? No. It couldn't be.
"Phoebe, please, I'm sorry" he said, STOP BEGGING, YOU'RE TOO POWERFUL TO BE BEGGING TO SOME LAME ASS WITCH. Again? What was happening? STOP BEGGING. What the hell was that?
"Phoebe, please, I'm so sorry, lets just talk this out, please?" he said. Phoebe's face popped out. "here" she said handing him his boxers angrily. She shut the door just as quickly as she opened it. "are you really gonna make me sleep on the couch?" he asked, looking at his boxers. "yes, you know where the sheets are" she said. Cole was obviously no stranger to sleeping on the couch, in fact it had happened countless times before. Cole sighed deeply, "Phoebe" he said.
STOP IT YOU FOOL!! WE DON'T NEED HER, WE'RE TOO POWERFUL. What was this voice inside him? It was this blinding pain, this numbness of his mind and his body and most of all, his love for Phoebe. "Phoebe, please, come on, open up" he said, STOP GROVELING.
He pushed the thoughts out of his head, it almost pained him to "I don't know what got into me, maybe it was the whisky, come on baby, open up" he said, it was always cautious to blame it on alcohol.
Phoebe heard his pleads from the other side, standing silently next to the door, wanting to just let him in. No, she wasn't. She was too strong.
"Let me in, please, I love you" he said. LOVE? YOU DISPICIPAL FOOL. I WANT TO KILL YOU SO BAD. Push the voices out, just push them out Cole, be a good man, push them out.
His I love you's was all she needed, she swiftly opened the door and fled into his arms. He smiled over the top of her head and kissed it. "I'm sorry, I really am, it's just, this whole source thing, you know?" Cole said, trying to ignore the horrible pain that circled in his head. "It's ok, just… it's fine" she said as she kissed him. Cole let himself melt into her kiss, and suddenly the voices weren't there, neither was the pain, maybe this was some sort of virus?
Cole felt as he was pulled into the bedroom and closed the door behind him, as he slowly fell on Phoebe, his strong body crushing hers. "I love you" he said as he sank into that little world where there was only Phoebe and him.
But the feeling was still there, the voices. DON'T TRY ANYTHING FOOL, I WILL MAKE YOU PAY IF YOU PUT ME THROUGH THIS CHEAP DEMONSTRATION OF WHAT YOU MORTALS CALL LOVE.
Cole backed away, he pulled away from Phoebe, scared for his life, not only for his, but for Phoebe's. He knew that this voice was more than just a schizo, it was something that made his spine chill and his bones go cold.
"what is it?" she asked sweetly, "I can't do this, I'm just…." He said as he laid back on the pillow. "what? Are you ok?" Phoebe asked concerned. "can we not? I just… I have the biggest headache, and I'm so tired, after the whole Hollow thing…" he lied. "oh, of course, I should've known, poor baby" she said as she kissed his forehead. She knew that having something inhabit your body must have drained some energy form him, she understood his weakness. Cole smiled and hugged her as she buried her face in his chest.
So they just cuddled, they cuddled almost all night, until a sleeping Phoebe moved to her side of the bed as she always needed her space to sleep. Cole remained awake, trying to digest the thing that was eating up inside of him. And soon enough fell asleep and was pulled awake by a terrible dream in which he discovered that he had turned into the one thing he had helped his beloved destroy.
*That's when "the three faces of Phoebe", I figured there was no intermission of a week between the two episodes because I doubt Cole could've handled one week of being the source and not having suspected anything*