Okay hopefully you guys like it, some times each chapter will be differen't from the last, like its skipping a couple of days at the tower and just popping on

the more important Raven Robin events.

I do not own the teen titans Even though I wish I did=.......(

Ok this chapter is based on Apprentice part 2, it is happening near the end of the show right after Starfire goes to talk to Robin, but instead of him leaving with her she leaves him alone to gather his thoughts for a couple more minutes.

Thats when Raven comes in(;

I watched quitly from behind some boxes, Robin stood a couple of feet away from the edge looking alone and ashamed with himself. But I knew that it wasn't his fault. I thought about how Cyborg and Beast Boy kept screaming at him for not telling us he was pretending to be slade's apprentice. They've been to harsh on him, but still it would of been a little helpful if we were in on the plan, but no matter how hard it was for me to admit it, Slade was indeed smart, he would of noticed if we held back on him, or vise versa. I just kept quit as I watched them exchange words of fustration. Thats when Robin had, had enough and left the common room still wearing that half metal Slade suit with that 'S' parched over his chest, I knew where he'd be going, the same place where I went to clear my thoughts.

The roof. It was mine and Robin's spot. Even though we did not clearify that. I would go there early every morning and just watch the sun rays peek over the horizon and hit the water breathtakingly. I have been doing this alone for about 2 weeks until Robin started showing up. The first time I thought it was a coincidence to find him up there before me, I turned around to leave, but he had spotted me before I got the chance to. He motioned for me to come stand next to him. Somehow I couldn't refuse , I felt unnaurally calm when I was with him. Heck, it beat staying up in my room all alone. The next day I found him up there again and throughout the week too, but then it became so commenly he would bring me my herbal tea, only if he woke before me, if I woke before him I would bring him his cup of medium strong coffee, it was a silent deal we had made using no words but just actions like a smile here and a nod there.

While we were up there we would bearly speak to eachother, we would just stand next to eachother in a comfortable silence, but sometimes we would hold a light conversation. When Robin just needed to talk about something he would just let everything out not careing if i cared or not, just almost like he was saying it to himself.I added comments here and there and always helped him with his problems, he would try to get me to talk about my private matters to, he said he wanted to know me, be inside my head like I was in his, but I never really let him know to much, becuase if he even got a glimse of my backround or life story, I don't think he would except me as a hero anymore, I'm bearly getting used to him refaring me as his friend.

Starfire had came out to talk to him a couple of minute's ago, before I did, she wasn't used to his dark side. She did not understand it, she was to cheerful and naive to really know what was going on. She couldn't really help him. He could fool her and make her believe he was alright and back to normal, but he couldn't fool me. I knew him to well. It was hard to know what he was feeling since he hid behind that mask, I wonder if people got fustrated at me for hiding being my mask. The way I make my face emotionless, it makes it hard to know how I felt or what I was thinking, but probably no one cared anyway. Instead of looking at his eyes for answers like I did too everyone else, I looked at his facial features and at his actions. Like the way his mask crippled up a bit at the top when he was confused or fustrated or deep in thought, or the way his mouth smirked when he was amused or happy.

That smirk also always appeared on his face when he was up to no good. That's when I knew to be out of his way or I might be caught in the middle of whatever he was planning.

Starfire tried comfortiing him by putting a warm orange hand on his shoulder, I thought he would of shooken it off, but he didn't. It's little things like this that I notice everday, like the way Starfire's smile increases whenever Robin walks in the room, or like how on almost every mission Robin chooses starfire to team up with him instead of anyone else. Simple geastures like this are bearly obvious to others but they don't escape my quit observations.

I know it is obvious to the other titans that Starfire has a strong attachment to RObin, but no one really knew what Robin felt about Starfire, all of them just assumed he felt the same way. I was one of them. I assumed that Robin returned the feelings too, like in all those movies where the good looking jock always ends up with the gorgeous popular cheerleader, but it is not in my right to assume and judge people, especially since I am always judged so cruely as being the weird gothic anti-social one. A witch. Thats what people think of me, even though they don't say it, I am positive that's what they think of me when I walk in the room.

That's why I try not to, that's why I stay in the safty in my room where I am alone and no one can assume anything about me. But it's not there fault, I am a horrible evil demon lurking around earth trying to do good, but I know the truth, I can never be good, not when trigon is my father and a part of him is inside me. I was born to end the world. That is my destiny that is the reason I was consummed. So I guess Starfire and Robin will never be destined to be together and live a long happy life together, becuase there destiny, was to die a painfull cruel death, by having their flesh rot to stone, So I guess Robin nor Starfire would be able to have their heart broken by one another, since their hearts will be...rock hard. Literally.

What kind of monster would do this you ask? What kind of human soul will have the heart to kill the people they call their family? Well close to family that is? Well none. Becuase I am not Human, only part, I am a demon, with an evil passion to kill and hurt. Inside me their is a wicked part that could not be tamed and if let out, I'd rather not finish this thought.

But, I do have a heart, thats one of the few human traits I inheritad from my mother, I am extremly thrilled to have one, to have the ability to feel and to choose for myself. I like putting my hand over my heart and feeling my it thud against my chest, I do it to remind me that I am not fully horrid and evil and demonic, I do it to remind myself I am also a creuture of earth, a human, a real person that can love. But then I remember that I can destroy the whole city and hurt the people I care for by not keeping my emotions in control, If I get too angry or to excited or too much of any feeling, The outcome will not be pretty.

I decided to leave Robin and Starfire alone so they can talk, but before I was fully fazed through the floor I heard Robin call out to me.

"Raven, I know your there." I was stunned at first. How could he have known? I was quiet I didn't even make the slight bit of noise. I quickly recovered and phased through the floor to come up a couple of feet behind him.

"I was going to come talk to you, but I guess Starfire already beat me to you." I did not know that later on that statement would have a double meaning to it. I was about to fazeback into my room untill curiousity struck me.

"Robin, how did you know I was there?" I said in my normal monotone without any trace of a question in it, my eyes looked around for a second, Starfire was not their anymore, she must'of left while I was deep in thought. Robin turned around to face me. My gaze lingered to his face. He was not mad that I was sneaking up on him and Starfire, he still had that same ashamed look on his face. He smiled a fake smile, like the one's he gave Starfire, but this one was a little different he looked guilty too. But for what? Why would he feel guilty?

"I felt you." He answered as easy as if I was asking him his favorite color, Which made me even a little more confused, but ofcourse I didn't show it.

"You..felt me?" I asked trying to hold back my confusion.

"Yeah, more this time." His face went from ashamed, to fake happiness, to serious. That's it I am entirely confused right now. Has Robin gone mad? Before the question 'Are you Okay' left my lips, he spoke again.

"You have no idea what I'm talking about huh." he said with that serious expression splattered on his face but I could still hear the ammusment in his voice. That sick bird brain was enjoying my confusion, wasn't he?

"Is it that obvios?" I answered sarcasticlly. I am usually very bright and able to piece what people say together and understand them too, but Robin is not like other people he is more like me, we sometimes speak too eachother in riddles.

He chuckled lightly and spoke again. "Not really, but I would be confused too if I were you."

"So can you please explain too me what on earth you are talking about then?" I redied myself for his explanation, and maybe he would actually turn out not to be completly insane....just really crazy.

"Do you remember when..you know..I had those illusions and thought that slade was back." He sounded kindof uncomfortable saying it, but I wouldn't blame him if he was embarressed about it, I'm just glad its all over.

I nodded for him to go on.

"Do you also remember when you saved me by going into my head and finding out what was wrong with me?"

"How can I forget that, it was one of the worst days of my life." I couldn't stop myself from saying that and it sounded much worse than I thought it would. I looked up again and searched Robin's face for a reaction. I just hope that he wasn't mad. I got my wish. He wasn't mad, but hurt. I immediatly felt guilty, I guess I owed him an explanation. I opened my mouth to correct myself but he cut me off.

"Linking minds with me was that bad?" He kept any emotion from his voice, it sounded stern, almost like mine. I didn't like it.

"Robin, I didn't mean it like that." I tried to assure him, but he is so stubbern he wouldn't believe me without an explanation.

"Then how did you mean it?" he said with that same serious/hurt look he had on before.

"Going into your head and linking minds with you was one of the hardest decisions I had to make, if it wasn't that your life was on the line, I would'of never of done it." I ended my speech and struggled to quickly find words for his next question since I knew what it was going to be.

"Why?" He asked. Ofcourse. I knew he was going to ask it, but I still don't know how to answer it without giving out so much information about me and my backgrund. This was going to be tough.

There was a couple of seconds of silence before I opened my mouth again.

"Because." Is all I answered. The great and wise Raven that always had a quick come back to everything even Beastboy's lame jokes, had nothing other than 'becuase' to say. This was a very sad day for me. I knew Robin would press for more than that. But what could I say? That I could'of killed you with one wrong move? That I could of made your brain explode if I concentrated too much, and if I didn't concentrate enough I could of pulled part of you back into my body and left you a half brainless walking zombie, But something inside me told me that those weren't the right words to say eather.

"Because?!?" He was starting to get fustrated with me, even I was starting to get fustrated with myself. "That's your explanation? Becuase!" Oh No, this wasn't a good thing, If he doesn't calm down he'll probably get me all fustrated too and that's one of the worst things to do right now. But if thats all I had to say, then thats all I had to say! Who was he to make me speak. He never told any of us his real name or where he came from! He where's a mask everday even when He goes to bed i bet, shows how much he trust's us, his own teammates, his own true friends. That's what this team needs, A great leader, with an obbsessive over worked side to him that doesn't trust anyone and is a total hypracrip.

I mentally slapped myself. I needed to calm down, I didn't get to meditate all day today with all the yelling in the tower so it would'nt be very smart of me to release any emotion I was holding back right now, and most of my emotions were pretty pist off, but even though how much Robin upset me, I knew I didn't mean any of the things I was thinking.

"I'm sorry." My voice came out awfully soft, I even caught the surprise expression that popped onto his face. I started off with an apology to show him I'm in no mood to fight. I decided to give him a half truth explanation, which means to tell him why it was one of the worst days of my life but I won't get into deep detail.

"The reason it was one of the worst days of my life was that I put one of my teammates in great danger, Robin you know how risky that was for me? To know that one slight wrong move could corrupt your friend's whole body and scar him for life."

"What do you mean?" he asked. I needed to be carefull around Robin becuase he's always the one person I say to much around. It's not that I don't trust him, it's that I'm afraid of what he'll think of me afterwards, He is indeed a great hero, even though he doesn't think so, He thinks he's just a unappreciated side kick, he thinks that thats all he'll ever be, that he was meant to live in the shadow of the great batman, the other powerless superhero with great talent. If only I could tell him that he was better than that, if only I could show him how much he means to everyone around him and how much people in this city look up to him, he even has his own action figure for crying out loud, but no matter how great he is in the eye's of all these people, the only person he really those care for an opionion is Batman's. I don't know why Robin is so stubborn and competative towards his own Figure father. Batman is the one that taught him everything he knows, if he wanted to be better than Batman then he should of gotten another teacher. I personally think there both equally strong and brave. There like twin brothers. I don't know Batman that very well, but He must'of rubbed off on Robin becuase they both have the same personalities. I've only known Robin for a coiple of months but it seems to me he has 2 sides to him.

One of them was a bright, happy, pleasent person to be around, but he wasn't Starfire or Beastboy's kind of cheerfull he had a dark side to him too, he tried to hide it by being joyful most of the time, but I've been seeing a lot of it nowadays, Especially when slade's around. He has a mysterious and abstruse side to him. NOt like Batman, Batman tries to be dark, he hasn't been through hell and back, Batman is actually a happy person too but he is normally like that. Robin wants to be his own person and tries to be different than Batman, but he is so much alike him in many ways, but Something makes them noticably different. I just don't know what, Its like Batman is the dark one and Robin is the light one of the team, like there trying to keep balance like jiang and yiang, but if I were to choose, based on their aura's, Batman would be the one wearing the traffic light costume.

"Robin do you know why I always meditate?" I asked as if I was talking to a 1st grader.

"Yeah to keep your emotions in check." Robin said.

"Yeah, but even though I do that, there's always a chance that they can get out of control."

"So I was in danger when our minds melded?" He seemed to actually start getting it, maybe I underestimated Robin, He actually is smarter than a dog, to bad I can't say the same for beastboy.

"Yess." I simply replied.

He looked like he was strugglying to ask a question. This made me a little more eager to hear it.

"Raven did, anything go wrong when it happened?" He asked as if not trying to affend me. Went wrong? What did he mean? I was absuloutly carefull when I did it, if anything went wrong I would of known by now. But what if something did, what if now we share one mind and everyone of my thoughts has been through his head. Oh no...then he would know that I have a secret weakness for chocolate. He would be able too use it against me and- ugh I have to stop overreacting, maybe he's just asking to make sure. Hopefully thats why.

"No..It went better than I hoped it would, why?" I could not feel his presence anymore, as if he was not there. I held back a gasp of amazment. My eyes widened. How did he do that? A minute ago his aura was practicully suffecating me. Maybe thats what he meant by feeling me? But only a empth could do that, or at least I thought.

"Robin, how did you do that?" I asked eager to hear his answer, I knew our minds linking were going to have some kind of affect. We would be able to tell eachothers presence more clearly, and he could feel the others emotions, not like being able to tell what there feeling kind of way, but if something is bugging them or if their confused then the they would be able to know without the other person actually telling them what their feeling.

When I went into his head, I accidentally saw something I knew I shouldn't have, I saw glimpse of his past, I saw a circus and two falling figures, then it flashed to Batmans face. There was a lot of images being flashed in a incrediable fast speed. I knew that maybe, he had the same experience of images of my life being flashed through his head, but I prayed to whatever god was out there and hoped he didn't, who knew what kind of nightmares would be the outcome of that experience. I shuddered at the thought of it.

"You felt it too?" He asked with one eyebrow raised up.

"Is that what you mean by felt? You felt my aura?"

"I think so, It started happening a week after you went inside me, Remember last week when I fall asleep on the couch?"

"Yeah." How could I forget he scared me by popping up still half asleep.

"When you walked into the room I immediatly knew it was you even with my eye's close."

"And you had to pop up like that why?" I asked sarcasticly.

He scratched his neck nervously and let out a chuckle. "Oh ya sorry about that Raven." I gave him a 'you think sorry is gunna cut it' look but then nodded to accept his apology anyway.

"Anyway, Raven it's been getting more stronger, now I can feel your presence as if you were a inch away from me when you really 15ft away." I guess I knew why he was complaining, who would want to feel me on their side twenty-four seven? That must be torture. I have been feeling Robin too but I thought it was becuase my powers were getting stronger, but now Im noticing that it has mostly only been him.

"Oh, I'm sorry." This wasn't like me to apoligize so much but it was my powers that is ruining his life and so it is my fault.

"It's not your fault, and don't worry, it isn't a bad thing, I kind of feel like we have a bond now."

"A bond? Is that what your calling it?"

He let out a light chuckle. "Well I know you'll perfer to use the term curse but it isn't a bad thing at all, atleast for me." Robin stated firmly. What did he mean atleast for me? He didn't think that having a bond with me was a curse? I knew he always wanted to 'know' me and get closer to me. But like this? Well, I guess havin a bond with him isn't that bad, it actually makes me feel closer to him, in a way.

"Robin what else can you feel?" I asked in a serious tone.

"I know when your awake, or when somethings wrong, and umm-."

"And what else?"

"When you entered my mind, I think some pieces where left behind."

"As in a part of me is in you?"

"No, I just feel like were..connected in some way."

"Robin I knew these effects would happen but were not suppose to have any connection, So i have no idea what you mean by that?" This wasn't an effect of our minds linking. Me and my magic had no part in him feeling this way.

"I mean when I'm with you, I feel..whole?" He asked in a question more than a statement.

"If this is your way of saying I complete you Bird Boy, then you have a strange way of saying it." I said jokingly, A couple of giggles escaped my lips before I could hold them back, I wasn't so carefree infront of anyone but something about Robin let me be myself and free. I would forget of what I am when I was enaged in a conversation with him, It felt nice.

Robin plastered a big smirk on his face as if he were proud of himself for something. "Raven this is the first time I have ever heard you laugh!"

"And its the only time Boy Wonder." Any sign of laughter was clear of my face by now and all I could focuse on was Robin's annoying smirk.

"Who knew Raven could be funny?" Oh ha. ha he was hilarious.

"I thought you would, since we do have a bond." I smiled, for some reason having a bond with him felt rather good, especially to know that I had someone to grow close to and to actually know the real me, but it would be a long time untill he did. Only becuase we had this..connection didn't mean I would immediatly tell him everything that happened to me in life.

For the first time today, Robin smiled, a real smile. I guess he also liked the idea of us sharing a bond together too.

"Thanks Raven." He said sincerily in a soft tone.

"For what?"

"For saving me, when no one else could."

"Well if you weren't here to lead this team, Beastboy might of been dead by now....On the other hand maybe that wouldn't be such a bad thing." He tried holding down his laughter but it didn't work. I wish I could be that carefree and laugh when I thought something was funny or amusing but not everyone in life was lucky.

His laughs finally died down untill we were surrounded by silence, I think we were both in deep thought right now. All I thought about though was one question, the question that was the real reason I even came to talk to him in the first place, The question was the reason why I havn't fazed to my room by now. I wanted to know how it felt to be on the bad side. How it feels to be the Villian for once. I wanted to know why they were evil and why they choose to destroy the lives of innocent people. Did it feel good? Did it make you feel powerfull. Or was it for there sick ammusment to kill? I knew that a part of me craved o be evil, becuase I was born to be, but I just couldn't let myself do it, no matter how much times I came to conclusion that I wasn't good, I also knew that I wasn't fully evil too. I've lived my whole life in the middle. Not caring where the line of good and bad stood. But I felt good and it was satisfying, but I still have a hunger for being bad, to hear innocents screaming for dear life for them to beg me to let them live at my feet. I wanted to know how it felt to live on the bad side for once and now that Robin has felt it, maybe He can pursuade me not too. Maybe.

"How did it feel?"

"To what?" He asked as confused as I was earlier.

"To be bad? How did it feel to be on the other side for once?" Robin looked kind of surprised at my question, it took him a minute or two to come up with an answer but he answered it anyway.

"It felt, good, it made me feel, strong..... powerfull, like something inside me was satisfied for all the shit its been through." Robin answered roughly with a strange grin on his face, he looked like he was about to prounce on his pray. He looked wicked. I was caught of gaurd at his answer. I thought he was mR. goody toe shows that only lived for saving people and being good, I guess assuming was wrong. I was surprised that he didn't lie to me. I knew he knew I had a dark side to me too, so why did he tell me it felt good. Did he want me to turn into a Villian? The time I needed him to lie to me most was the time he was being completly honest with me.

And thats when I felt it. He the great Boy Wonder had a hunger for destruction also.

to be continued..