Chapter One: Berwald and Tino

I don't know you

But I want you

All the more for that

Words fall through me

And always fool me

And I can't react

"Alright. Berwald! Show us what you've got!"

Berwald gave a terse nod and briskly went for the drum kit. Sitting on the stool, he pushed up his glasses and held the drumsticks firmly in his hands. He was nervous but he wasn't about to let his professor and classmates know that. And especially with Tino watching. He can't screw this up.

Technically it's just the third day of class and they were still going through the rudimentaries, or to put it simply, Drumming 101, but he still had to make a good impression. This is a prestigious music school, after all. And, Tino is watching.

"Okay, I wanna hear your paradiddles."

Berwald straightened his back and started playing. Ra-ta-ta-ra-ta-ta-ra-ta-ta-ra-ta-ta. He concentrated on nothing else but his arms, all the way to his fingers.

"Good. Now do some flam."

Berwald nodded and went back to playing. His head bobbed in time with the beats.

Ra-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta.

"Excellent! Thank you, Berwald. Now let's hear…" the professor scanned his eyes around the room, "Tino."

Tino blinked in surprise but quickly regained himself. "Yes!"

As Tino approached the kit, Berwald stood up. Their eyes met for a brief moment. The drumsticks were passed from Berwald to Tino, their fingers accidentally brushing.

Berwald went to sit down with his other classmates while Tino now took over the drums. He tried to remain composed, but his heart was jumping in his chest. It was really stupid to say that he's in love with Tino, because he had only known him for three days since the start of the semester. They had barely even talked! But Berwald knew that ever since he laid eyes on Tino's smiling face that he wanted him. Berwald wasn't usually the type of person who believed in love at first sight, but here he was. Hopelessly lovestruck fool.

"Tino, I want you to do ratamacue."

Tino twirled the sticks around his fingers for a few seconds and then started hitting the drums. Ra-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta. Tino was good, Berwald observed. His tempo was perfect, and the way he handled the drumsticks was as if they were extensions of his arms.

"Okay, switch to flamadiddle."

Tino obeyed and continued to hit the drums effortlessly.

"That's pretty impressive, Tino. I'm going to challenge you a bit, eh? Let's go for a double swing."

Tino nodded and started to play faster. The professor clapped his hands and Tino matched his every beat. Gradually, the professor clapped faster and faster, and Tino did his best to keep up. Berwald could see the pressure getting to Tino, his face scrunching a bit as he exerted more effort and sweat started to form in his brows. Berwald watched Tino in awe. He had not yet learned how to play that fast. Berwald was more of a slow jazz type of drummer.

"-aaaaaaand, bang!" A final, loud clap. The professor smiled at Tino and nodded appreciatively. "Amazing, Tino, well done! I have to say, you are one of the best first years I have ever handled in all of my years teaching here, and we're only on the third day. I can only imagine how good you'll be when you graduate. Keep it up!"

Tino smiled, exhausted but looking very triumphant. "Thank you, sir!"

"Great! Alright, class dismissed! See you all tomorrow!"

The students started to file out of the room but Berwald remained glued to his seat. The professor gave one last smile to Tino and headed out as well. Tino wiped his sweaty brows, and noticed Berwald still seated. Berwald realized that they were the only ones left in the room. Embarrassed, he stood up, knocking the chair down in his haste. Panicked, he picked the chair up, muttered a "s'rry", and went for the door-

"WAIT!"

Berwald slowly turned his head around to see Tino standing behind the drum kit, his left hand still carrying the drumsticks, his right hand outstretched in front of him, and the stool knocked over behind him.

Tino smiled shyly at him. "Berwald, right?"

Berwald faced Tino, suddenly aware of how hot his ears were becoming. "Yes," his fingers fidgeted at the end of his shirt, "Ye um-ye play really well." Berwald prayed that he wasn't blushing too hard. He forced himself to keep his fingers still and look Tino directly in the eye.

"Thank you, Berwald. You're also a good drummer yourself."

"Not as good as you. Yer so much bett'r," Berwald replied, "Yer real talent'd. And I, uh, I admire yer skill."

Oh, god, Berwald was tripping over his words. He probably sounded so stupid to Tino. He wanted to bolt out of the door now and whack himself in the head. Why oh why was he born with such terrible communication skills?

"Oh, Berwald, you're so nice," Tino chuckled and tucked a stray hair behind his ear.

"Yer welc'me," Berwald gulped. "I, uh…" He thought of something else to say, "...um… er…" Tino beat him to it.

"You know what? That drumming exercise made me hungry. D'you wanna…" Tino walked over to Berwald and looked up at him with shy eyes, "do you wanna grab some dinner with me? If that's alright with you?"

Berwald's hands started to sweat. His throat felt like there was a mouse stuck in there. He tried to open his mouth. No use. He lost the ability to form words. He settled for a nod instead.

Tino smiled. "Great! Let's go!"

Berwald wasn't even hungry, but if Tino is asking him to go to dinner with him, then he would go.

They couldn't decide on a place to eat, or rather, Tino couldn't decide on a place to eat and when he would ask Berwald, he would just reply with "anywh're ye want". They ended up at McDonald's. Tino ordered a bunch of food: a Big Mac, large fries, and a large soda. Berwald got himself regular-sized fries just so Tino wouldn't feel awkward eating alone.

"So, Berwald," Tino started after a swallow, "where are you from?"

"Swed'n".

"Oh, wow, really?" Tino exclaimed, "I'm from Finland! This is so cool!"

Berwald's heart fluttered. So he and Tino had some kind of connection - they were the only foreigners in the class, and they were both from Nordic countries, neighboring countries, even. Berwald started to wonder if he now believed in destiny.

"We're like neighbors! Or something…" Tino giggled as he munched on a french fry.

"Y-yeah…" Berwald responded.

"I'm so glad we're in the same class! I was afraid that I would feel like a loner here, you know, because I'm not from here. And I noticed since the first day that you were always by yourself, too. I thought you were scary at first, but it turns out that you're actually a nice guy!"

Berwald just listened to Tino's rambling. He didn't mind that Tino used to think he was scary. He got that a lot because he does have quite an intimidating face. But that didn't matter because Tino now thinks he's a nice guy. And Tino was currently sitting across him at McDonald's, talking nonsensically while munching his fries at the same time, and not noticing the streak of mustard on the side of his mouth. Berwald almost had to sit on his hands to stop himself from reaching over to wipe it off.

"Um, ye have must'rd over here," Berwald pointed at the side of Tino's mouth.

"Hmm? Oh!" Tino laughed, a bit embarrassed, as he wiped it off. "Thanks, heh, I'm a messy eater."

Berwald did not know how to act, how to respond, or even react to anything Tino said. He was paralyzed. He still couldn't believe that he and Tino were now talking. Just the two of them. He just let Tino talk, because Berwald was tongue-tied and did not know what to say. He was content with watching Tino, because oh my god, Tino was adorable, and funny, and just perfect. And Berwald was falling more and more in love. Berwald had never felt for anyone like this before, and he felt stupid for falling so quickly, but he had absolutely no control over it.

"When did you start playing the drums?" Tino asked as they were walking back to the dorms.

"When I was tw'lve," Berwald answered, his hands in his pockets.

"Ohhh… why did you choose drumming?"

"I dunno… I guess… helps me relieve stress." Compared to other instruments that he tried, drumming proved to be very therapeutic for Berwald. "How 'bout you?"

Tino tilted his head back and hummed. "Hmm… I guess ever since I was a kid, I always thought drumming was fun! I started when I was seven, and as I grew up, it became a passion and I started dreaming of being the drummer of a popular band."

"Ah," Berwald suddenly felt a wave of affection, "what sorta band d'ye want t' be in?"

Tino glanced sideways at Berwald and smirked. "Heavy metal."

Berwald raised his eyebrows in surprise. "Heavy met'l?"

Tino grinned. "Yeah! Why are you so surprised?"

"N-nothin'," Berwald was blushing.

"It's okay," Tino laughed. "A lot of people are also surprised when I tell them that. Maybe because I don't look like the type of person to like heavy metal. No tattoos, no piercings. No stereotypical metal image. What about you, Berwald? What type of drummer are you?"

"Jazz," Berwald replied.

"Well, Berwald, I think you do seem like a very jazz type of person," Tino mused.

Berwald wanted to ask him why he thought so but then Tino suddenly stopped walking.

"Here's my dorm," Tino gestured to the building behind him. "So, I'll see you tomorrow, then? Bye, Berwald, thanks for coming with me!"

"'kay, bye, see ya…"

Tino jogged to the door, waved and flashed a smile at Berwald before disappearing inside.

Now alone, Berwald allowed himself to show the smile he'd been holding back all along as he walked to his own dorm.

"Faster, Berwald, faster!"

Berwald gritted his teeth and pounded faster and harder as he was told.

"You're not focused enough, Berwald!"

Berwald squeezed his eyes shut. Faster, faster, faster…

"You're missing some beats! What's happening to you, Berwald?"

Berwald grunted and sped up. His arms were aching, his fingers were stinging and he could feel wetness in his hands. Sweat? He cracked one eye open. A streak of red was running down his wrist.

"Okay, that's enough. You need more practice, Berwald. Speed isn't your strength at the moment."

Berwald let himself breathe for a few moments before moving. Slowly, he took a look at his hands. Yep, blood.

His professor noticed. "Is this the first time you've bled?"

Berwald nodded.

The professor looked almost sorry for him. "I'm afraid that will not be the last time your hands will bleed. But the more your hands bleed, the better you get at drumming."

Berwald nodded again, and found Tino's eyes. Tino smiled weakly at him and mouthed, "It's okay." Berwald didn't feel the pain in his hands anymore.

Berwald wasn't called again until after a few days when his wounds had healed. He had watched his classmates play. Some of them were terrible, some were good, but none was as good as Tino. Tino was simply the best among them.

When they were dismissed, he waited for Tino by the door. They had started walking home together after that day they first talked to each other. It had become an unspoken agreement between them. They were now friends, Berwald liked to think, and his heart still fluttered every time Tino looked at him. Unlike Berwald, though, Tino now had lots of other friends which wasn't really surprising since Tino was naturally friendly. What surprised Berwald is that Tino chose to hang out with him more. Not that he was complaining.

"Hey, Berwald, how are you?" Tino asked as he approached him.

"'m good, you?"

"I'm fine as well, thank you," Tino smiled at him.

They walked in silence for a moment, Tino happily humming a tune Berwald did not recognize.

"Tino?"

"Yes?"

"Did'ye ev'r bleed while drumming?"

Tino laughed. "Oh, yes, a hundred times, probably. It really happens with fast drumming, and yeah, our prof was right. The more you bleed, the better you get. Brutal, huh? But true."

"Oh," Berwald mumbled. Tino had bled a hundred times? He had so much more respect for Tino now. Tino was strong. And hardcore.

"Don't worry, Berwald. I'm sure you'll improve a lot more. You have a lot of potential. It's just that your forte is slow jazz, that's why you're struggling. But you're really good, and you'll get there soon."

Berwald couldn't help it. Tino was just so nice, so wonderful, so sincere, so inspiring and perfect. He couldn't help the smile from spreading across his face. "Th'nk you."

Tino broke into a gasp. "Berwald!"

Berwald bowed his head down, embarrassed.

Tino giggled and placed a hand on Berwald's shoulder. "If you want, I can help you."

"You would?" Berwald was startled.

"Sure, why not?" Tino shrugged. "I'd be glad to help you."

"I, uh… I, um… hhhhh…"

Tino cocked his head sideways and grinned. "Yes?"

Berwald almost choked. "Yes, thank you, Tino, so much… I appreciate it."

A firm but gentle hand squeezed his shoulder. Berwald willed himself to relax and not stiffen under Tino's touch.

"Great!"

Berwald dreamed of Tino that night.

He dreamed that the entire world was empty except for him and Tino.

The entire world in that dream was their classroom. It was dim, but there seemed to be a ray of light illuminating Tino's angelic face. He was smiling at Berwald. They didn't speak. They just stood in the middle of the room, facing each other, staring at each other.

Berwald was content in reveling in Tino's beauty, his sweet smile, and his eyes full of life and excitement. Truth be told, it was Tino's natural and effortless charm that drew Berwald in infatuation. Even though they were now hanging out and could already be considered friends, Berwald still barely knew anything much about Tino. Maybe it was the mystery that entices him, that there is so much more to Tino than cheerful smiles and ready laughs and… death metal.

Suddenly, Tino moved over to the drum kit. Confused, Berwald followed him. Tino motioned for Berwald to sit on the stool, and he did. Slowly, Tino fished out a pair of drumsticks from his back pocket, leaned over the drumkit and pressed the sticks into Berwald's hands, his face so close it almost made Berwald fall from the stool.

Berwald's breathing became erratic. Tino's hands were still on Berwald's fingers running over the Swede's palms. He gulped as Tino stared deep into his eyes. Was Tino leaning in for a kiss? Oh, god, oh, god. Berwald closed his eyes in anticipation, albeit being nervous.

But then Tino grabbed his hand and banged the drumstick to the cymbal.

And then Berwald woke with a start.

"Berwald? Hey, you're acting weird today."

Tino snapped his fingers in front of Berwald's face. Berwald blinked.

It was a Saturday afternoon and they were at a park near the school.

"Are you okay? You keep on spacing out."

"Mm-hmm." Berwald pushed his glasses up his nose.

"Sure? You aren't sad? Or… sick?" The Finn asked in concern.

"'m okay," Berwald insisted.

Tino shrugged, "If you say so," and put his earphones back on.

They were sitting on a bench, waiting for the time of their reservation at one of the music rooms so that they could practice. But there was an hour more to go, so they decided to wait at the park. He could hear the blast of heavy metal through Tino's earphones. Berwald had brought a pocketbook with him, but he couldn't focus on reading. He gave up after reading the same sentence three times without grasping any of the words. He still couldn't stop thinking about his dream involving Tino, and the fact that the Finn was sitting there beside him did not help at all.

"Oh my gosh, this is one of my favorite songs!" Tino suddenly bounced in his seat and plucked off one of the earbuds to hand it to Berwald. "Listen to it, Berwald!"

"'kay." Berwald took it and plugged it in his ear, expecting the loud blast of death metal he was hearing earlier, but to his surprise, what he heard was a ballad, with a lovely soft piano intro.

Then Berwald heard the first few lines of the song. In fact, those were the only lyrics of the song that Berwald really remembered because it made him think of Tino.

I don't know you but I want you all the more for that

Words fall through me and always fool me and I can't react

The song was beautiful, simple, poetic, though Berwald felt that the last lines of the song were… sad.

"Did you like it?" Tino asked, smiling as Berwald returned the earbud.

"Yeah, 's nice," Berwald nodded, "bit sad, though.".

"A lot of people say it's a breakup song, but for me it's one of the best songs about love." Tino had a look of wonder in his face, like he was lost in his own world for a moment. "It doesn't matter if they didn't end up together, it's still about love."

Berwald nodded again, "'t is."

Tino scooted closer to Berwald with his chin in his hand. "What about you, Berwald? What's your favorite love song?"

Berwald breathed heavily as he felt Tino's leg accidentally brush against his. "Uhhh… nev'r really thought 'bout it."

Tino snorted. "Oh, come on! You're a jazz player. Jazz has a lot of romantic songs. Surely you must have a favorite?"

Berwald shrugged and shook his head. "Can't think 'f one right now."

"Well, you better think of one, and let me listen to it, hm?" Tino said as he stood up, tucking away his earphones. "Come on, it's time to practice."

Berwald was slack-jawed.

Tino was showing him the fastest drumming he could do. He can do up to 280 bpm*! 280! And Berwald was struggling with 220. Tino was a monster.

"Well, that's the fastest I could go," Tino said as he wiped the sweat off his forehead, "I'm aiming for 300 someday."

300. It made Berwald's head ache just thinking about it.

"Don't look so defeated, Berwald. You can do this!" Tino beamed at him. "We'll help each other out, and then you'll become the best jazz drummer in school, and I'll be the best metal drummer in school."

Well, if that didn't motivate Berwald enough, what would?

Berwald gave him a half-smile. "Yer already the best drummer in our batch, if not the whole school."

Even though that comment was most likely true, Tino blushed furiously and playfully smacked Berwald's arm. "Oh, stop it, you…"

"Heh heh, stop what?"

Tino gasped. "That doesn't matter anymore but," his gasp slowly turned into a smile, "I hope you won't stop laughing and smiling… 'cause I like it when you do that…"

Berwald did not even realize he emitted that laugh. He froze, all but his heart which thumped wildly in his chest and he and Tino stared at each other, suddenly embarrassed but there was definitely something else because Berwald could feel butterflies in his stomach.

But Tino broke the spell by awkwardly handing the drumsticks to Berwald. "So… let's start, yeah?"

Berwald moved to sit on the stool, still in a bit of a daze. For a moment he felt like he was back in that dream.

"What's the fastest you can go?"

"215, I think."

"Okay, let's start with 215, then we'll go to 220, 225, and so on, alright?"

Berwald nodded.

And then they began.

With Tino's help, Berwald quickly advanced up to 230 bpm. Tino was patient in teaching him, giving him an encouraging smile or praise every now and then.

Berwald began to struggle at 240 bpm. He kept missing beats. Sometimes he rushed but mostly, he dragged. He screwed his eyes shut, hoping it would help him concentrate. He wanted to impress Tino so badly.

"Take it easy, Berwald," Tino said urgingly.

But Berwald pressed on. How could he make Tino like him if he wasn't even be half as good as Tino?

And then he felt agonizing pain in his hands. He suddenly dropped the drumsticks and hissed. Tino shrieked.

There were deep gashes in his hands where blood continued to ooze out. It hurt a whole lot more than it did the first time.

"Oh, Berwald," Tino whispered softly as he approached Berwald and gently took his hands in his, "you shouldn't push yourself too hard."

Berwald was unable to meet Tino's eyes.

"I'll get some bandages. Just stay here, okay? I'll come back as quick as I can." Tino moved as if to touch Berwald's cheek, but went to awkwardly pat his arm instead, and ran for the door.

Berwald sighed. He should've listened to Tino. Now he probably won't be able to play again until after a few days or so. How was he supposed to practice now?

Tino returned a few minutes later bringing alcohol, cotton, and bandages.

"Does it hurt a lot?" he asked sweetly as he dabbed alcohol onto the cotton.

"Not much," Berwald lied and flinched a little when Tino pressed the cotton to his wounds.

"I'll try to be gentle," the Finn murmured as he gingerly nursed Berwald's wounds.

Somehow, the previous awkwardness was gone and they have slipped into a comfortable silence. Berwald just watched Tino clean up his wounds and Tino would blush when he caught Berwald staring at him, but it wasn't awkward anymore.

For a person who was a monster at the drums, Tino was gentle, Berwald reflected as he let the Finn bandage his hands. He decided that that was what he liked best about him.

"There! All done!" Tino smiled as he let go of Berwald's hands. Berwald flexed his fingers and murmured a "thank you".

"Look, Berwald," Tino sighed and grabbed Berwald's wrists which made the Swede look directly at him, "I know you're a pretty strong guy, but," he gently placed a hand over Berwald's bandaged palm, "please, please, don't hurt yourself."

Tino looked expectantly at him, as if waiting for an answer. Berwald did give him one, after summoning up some courage.

"Sorry, Tino. I want'd to… to impress you, that's why I kept pushin' myself too hard."

The Finn's face softened at his words. "Oh, Berwald. Why do you feel the need to impress me?"

This was it. The moment of truth. Berwald took a deep breath and forced himself to look Tino in the eye. "I like you, Tino." He didn't mumble, he didn't stutter. He said the words loud and clear.

He expected Tino to gasp in surprise, or stare at him incredulously as if he was a madman. Instead, Tino laughed, his eyes watering as he laced their fingers together. "You don't need to impress me, Berwald, because I already like you." He gave Berwald's hand a soft squeeze while he placed a gentle kiss on his cheek.

And then Berwald showed Tino his happiest, widest smile ever.

"Tino, ye told me t'think of a love song that I like best."

The Finn turned to look at Berwald with an expectant smile on his face. "Yes? What's the song?"

"Well… I went to list'n to all the love songs that I know, 'specially jazz ones."

"And…?" Tino asked excitedly.

"I actually didn't have to look far to find my fav'rite. I list'ned again to the song you showed to me that day on the park," he smiled shyly at Tino, "that's the one."

"Really?" Tino narrowed his eyes in mock suspicion, "Or are you just saying that to appease me?"

Berwald gave a soft laugh, "'ts the truth. The first four line… describe how I felt for ye… from the start."

Tino giggled, blushing as he recalled those first four lines and that day they first started talking to each other. "Oh, Berwald." He went so red that Berwald found it too adorable to handle.

Three hundred beats per meter. That was their goal by the end of the school year. That's how fast my heart beats when I'm with you, Berwald thought as he gazed at Tino lovingly.

Then they both sat on a stool each, their drum sets facing each other. Tino grinned at Berwald, a hint of challenging look in his eyes as he poised the drumsticks in his hands. "Ready?"

Berwald returned the challenging smirk. "Ready."

As they started hitting the drums, trying to beat their personal records, Berwald had never felt so happy in his life. He now had a steady relationship with the person he loved the most, doing what they both love to do, and helping and inspiring each other to improve. They may be very different from each other - personality-wise and genre-wise, but they have the same passion. And they will be the best drummers in school and maybe someday, the whole world.

*bpm - Beats per minute, a unit used to measure tempo in music

A/N: Special thanks to Sydney, aka SWAWindsong, for proofreading this chapter for me! This wouldn't be as good as it is now if it weren't for you!

Up Next: Alfred and Arthur