AN: hi there
…
"Konnichiwa, everyone. And welcome to… the one, the only, Hetalia! Talk Show! Where you get to ask us about anything you want!"
Kiku stared into the camera dramatically.
"Today, we have a very special guest that we managed to bring here for interview. Due to the popular request, we present you with the personification of the country England… who also represents the United Kingdom!"
A familiar short-haired blonde came stumbling out on stage, cursing and kicking wildly behind him as crew members pushed him out. Grumbling, Arthur made his way to the front and center of the stage.
Japan, expression politely still, cleared his throat at the awkward situation with his unwilling participant.
England, sighing and rolling his eyes, spoke, "Good day, fools. I don't want to be here, but you do. Please don't make this day harder for me than it already has been," as he sat down on the couch in front of the coffee table on stage.
Kiku followed suit soon after.
And then he started the questioning.
With a horrible question, at that.
"So, Igirisu-san, what is your reaction to the popular Hetalian saying, 'You can't spell uke without UK in it?"
At the strange question, England was taken aback.
Excuse me? was his first mental reaction when he processed the question.
But then after he got after the initial shock, he realized something.
"Why, they're absolutely correct," he replied smartly with a devilish smirk on his face. "You simply cannot spell uke without UK in it."
Japan, for one, was surprised at this answer. He had anticipated the British nation to go all tsundere on him, trying to defend himself until he gave up and felt thoroughly humiliated after he admitted to the saying being correct.
He did not, under any circumstances, expect England to readily accept being an uke.
But then Arthur continued his previous statement.
"I wholeheartedly agree that any uke may not be proclaimed as such without being utterly dominated by the representation of the United Kingdom, otherwise known as I, Arthur Kirkland, or any of the countries that are part of the United Kingdom, which includes my brothers Scotland, Wales, Northern Ireland, and of course, me, the personification of the country of England."
He paused.
"It would be a disgrace to name anyone an uke without them going through me first. Those other people who top any one of them are nothing compared to myself and my brothers. To be a true uke, I hereby proclaim that they must be topped by the UK so that they may experience the utmost example of domination, and anyone not authorized by the UK may not state that someone they topped is an uke. Because, as the saying goes…"
He smiled and winked at the audience.
"...you can't spell uke without UK."
…
AN: totally not seme England trash. Totally not UKUS trash. Really, I swear
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