Disclaimer: Don't own them but then again at this point maybe the fans are
the only ones who own them anymore. Certainly don't profit from them that's
for sure.
A/N: You can't tell me Max and Logan didn't come to some kind of understanding in the three days between the Jam Pony battle and the flag raising. Here's my version told from Logan's POV. This is total
M/L shipper stuff so be warned. And enjoy.
savedarkangel.net – stop by for campaign updates.
********
I think I knew that Max and Alec were a sham about 5 seconds after she walked out of my place that night.
Knew it inside, in that place that knew that Max loved me even though she had never admitted it in so many words. Knew why she was doing it, understood her misguided attempt to keep me safe. After all, wouldn't I do the same thing if it were her life in question? I wouldn't hesitate to give up anything to save her including my own life. So I knew. But I was still hurt over it and in pain, not that she wanted to keep me safe, but that she would lie to me and in a way that she had to know would cut deep.
Still despite it all I couldn't let her go. Even knowing that it was probably the best thing for both of us, that stubborn streak I have kicked in big time. Kicked in in the form of Eyes Only broadcasts ostensibly speaking of the transgenics but in reality designed to reach out to her. Kicked in with my running to be there and do whatever I could when Joshua got in trouble. Kicked in when I went to Jam Pony to find out why she had practically ignored me outside of Sam Carr's that day. Kicked in when I stayed in Seattle after White's goons trashed my apartment and turned Logan Cale into a hunted man.
I admit I tried to put a brave face on it in front of Alec when he came over that day as I was playing with the exoskeleton. Despite my stubborn desire to believe there was nothing between the two of them the fact remained that I had seen him hugging her outside of her apartment at a too early hour of the morning. In all honesty I couldn't quite see how any sane man wouldn't want Max including Alec her erstwhile breeding partner. That being the case no way in hell was I going to let him see me as some pathetic reject clinging to someone who had so cruelly turned away from me. No, better to let him think I was walking away from her, better to let him communicate that to her. False pride? Hell yes but pride was all I had to cling to in those days of hiding out in Joshua's abandoned house. Days going without any direct human contact except that to be had over a video screen. Days when every time that I saw Max over that screen I was this close to
abandoning all pretense at pride and begging her to tell me the truth that I saw in her eyes.
That all came to an end and pride went out the window when she called me to ask me if she could come over so I could look at the latest. Runes that had appeared on her back. I wondered briefly why she wanted me to see them in person when it would have been as easy to let one of the transgenics hold a video camera on them and then transmit the file to me. But I wasn't going to pass up the chance to be in the same room with her again and in fact I was going to do better than that. Ducking down to the corner convenience store I managed to find a bottle of bleach and heading back to my new place I quickly made up a solution of bleach and water strong enough to kill the nastiest of bugs, even a genetically engineered retrovirus. I had discussed the subject briefly with Beverly Shankar after my last bout with said virus and she had obligingly run a few simple tests assuring me that the bleach solution would work in a time of need. She had also supplied me with a box of latex gloves and advised me to wear them around Max. Max had made that precaution unnecessary by her actions but I had thrown the gloves into my bag when I left my apartment two steps ahead of White.
When Max walked in a few minutes later she glanced questioningly at the gloves I was putting on and I flippantly replied to her unspoken question "Basic CDC procedure."
"Yeah, to protect you against your biohazard girlfriend." She threw out as she seated herself on a chair and stripped off her vest preparatory to showing me the runes. My heart leapt at her words and then plummeted as she went on "I didn't mean that last part." Still there was something in the tone of her voice that gave me pause as I knelt down behind her.
"It's okay." I told her as I unzipped her and slid her top and bra straps down off of her shoulders to expose the runes, all the time thinking about how I had dreamt of doing such a thing but in completely different circumstances and for a very different reason. Unable to resist I gently touched the runes and I noticed the goose bumps on her skin at the feel of my gloved fingers. It wasn't cold in the room – if anything it was somewhat stuffy. I wondered if her thoughts were wandering in the same direction as mine and was sure of it with her next words.
"This is awkward." She observed and I tried to be casual as I replied,
"For me too." But at that point I was feeling anything but awkward. The truth was there for me to see. It was in the goose bumps on her skin, in the tone of her voice, in her reaction as I gently traced the runes. Finishing up with pictures of them I went to kneel in front of her and on impulse decided to test the conclusion I had come to. Her hands were crossed in front of her on the chair back and I reached out and gently began to play with her fingers as she ruminated on the purpose of the runes. After a startled glance at our linked hands her eyes met mine and I knew for sure. There was no Max and Alec, never had been and never would be. It was all there in her eyes. Just as I knew my feelings for her were there in my eyes for her to see. She let me hold her hand for a moment but then the Max I knew and loved kicked in and she was off leaving me to consider how best to proceed with my new knowledge. I didn't know what I was going to do but I knew I was tired of this game and was going to end it as soon as possible.
But then White saved me the trouble. As soon as I saw Max on television swooping in to Jam Pony I knew I had to be there. At the last minute I stopped and put on the exo. I didn't know what I was going into but it was a military weapon designed for combat use. I was a normal human mixing into something involving
humans with enhanced physical abilities and I might need every advantage I could find. Sure enough White turned the deal into an ambush and I thanked God for the exo as without thinking I threw myself into the fray my only thought that I couldn't stand there and watch Max take another bullet. I can't say I was upset about ending up inside Jam Pony with Max and crew. I had had every intention of getting on that bus with them if they had made it out there. No more sitting by my computer helplessly watching the woman I loved in the line of fire. This time I intended to stand shoulder to shoulder with her and her family. She had once told me I was her family as much as anyone and this time I was going to be there with them all.
Once I was inside Max and I fell easily into our old relationship offering each other support and strength as needed in the crisis. If the morning's events hadn't already told me that Alec was nothing to Max I would have known the minute she looked at me, not him, over Cece's body. Alec didn't even attempt to continue the charade, dropping back to talk strategy with Joshua and Mole, leaving Max to me. I knew it wasn't the time or place but I couldn't help the feeling of joy at being with Max once again, working together with her and seeing her turn to me to back her up. It was touch and go once White and his groupies made their move but I had the satisfaction of knowing that this time I was there with Max in the fight. Not to mention the sense of pride I felt at helping Alec out when the familiar female he was fighting was about to get the better of him. Unworthy I know but I never claimed to be perfect.
My real pride came later though when Max turned and rallied her people around her. "…I'm through running and hiding and being afraid. I'm not gonna live my life like that anymore…" Those words said it all to me. The girl I had met almost two years ago, the one who claimed to care for no one but herself had come full circle and had become a woman to be reckoned with. Looking around at the raised hands of her people I knew I was exactly where I wanted to be. This was the fight I had been preparing for all of my life and there was no way Max or anyone was going to send me away from it now.
When the transgenics had settled in for the night with the exception of the perimeter guards Max and I sat together on the rooftop of the building that had become the command center of Terminal City. I had slipped on a pair of the latex gloves and Max was wearing her leather biker gloves as a matter of course. For a while we just sat there in silence enjoying the rare sight of a clear sky filled with stars. Finally Max turned to me.
"Logan. About us…I mean about what I said to you…"She trailed off into silence again. I smiled at her.
"It's okay Max. I know. I know who we are." Unconsciously echoing the words I had said to her on that long ago night when the world had seemed to be in our grasp.
"No it's not okay. I wanted to keep you safe and instead I probably did you more harm than anything.
I'm sorry Logan. I didn't know." She turned away from me but not before I saw the gleam of tears in her eyes. Reaching out I gently took her chin and turned her to face me.
"Max. Listen to me. It's okay. I want to be with you in this, to stand by your side and fight by your side and even die by your side if it comes to that. Forget the past. We've both done our share of hurting each other but none of that matters anymore. Those people in there matter. Janelle's baby and Joshua and Alec and Mole, they matter. We matter but only when we've taken care of them. When that's done we'll figure this virus thing out. And if we don't we'll figure out how to live with it. Just promise me that your speech about no more running away included no more running away from us as well. That's all I ask."
She nodded and reached over to take my hand.
"Logan there's something I should have told you a long time ago." She hesitated and I sat silent knowing she had to do this on her own for it to mean anything. "I love you Logan." I came close in that moment to reaching down and kissing her but instead contented myself with twining my fingers more closely with hers and squeezing her hand.
"I love you Max." Words spoken, vows exchanged, we sat there together in the most broken down part of the broken down city called Seattle. Overhead the Space Needle towered and the stars shone and I knew that for that one moment in time everything was exactly as it should be. In the words of my mom,
"The universe is right on schedule" and I knew that I had finally found my place in it.
A/N: You can't tell me Max and Logan didn't come to some kind of understanding in the three days between the Jam Pony battle and the flag raising. Here's my version told from Logan's POV. This is total
M/L shipper stuff so be warned. And enjoy.
savedarkangel.net – stop by for campaign updates.
********
I think I knew that Max and Alec were a sham about 5 seconds after she walked out of my place that night.
Knew it inside, in that place that knew that Max loved me even though she had never admitted it in so many words. Knew why she was doing it, understood her misguided attempt to keep me safe. After all, wouldn't I do the same thing if it were her life in question? I wouldn't hesitate to give up anything to save her including my own life. So I knew. But I was still hurt over it and in pain, not that she wanted to keep me safe, but that she would lie to me and in a way that she had to know would cut deep.
Still despite it all I couldn't let her go. Even knowing that it was probably the best thing for both of us, that stubborn streak I have kicked in big time. Kicked in in the form of Eyes Only broadcasts ostensibly speaking of the transgenics but in reality designed to reach out to her. Kicked in with my running to be there and do whatever I could when Joshua got in trouble. Kicked in when I went to Jam Pony to find out why she had practically ignored me outside of Sam Carr's that day. Kicked in when I stayed in Seattle after White's goons trashed my apartment and turned Logan Cale into a hunted man.
I admit I tried to put a brave face on it in front of Alec when he came over that day as I was playing with the exoskeleton. Despite my stubborn desire to believe there was nothing between the two of them the fact remained that I had seen him hugging her outside of her apartment at a too early hour of the morning. In all honesty I couldn't quite see how any sane man wouldn't want Max including Alec her erstwhile breeding partner. That being the case no way in hell was I going to let him see me as some pathetic reject clinging to someone who had so cruelly turned away from me. No, better to let him think I was walking away from her, better to let him communicate that to her. False pride? Hell yes but pride was all I had to cling to in those days of hiding out in Joshua's abandoned house. Days going without any direct human contact except that to be had over a video screen. Days when every time that I saw Max over that screen I was this close to
abandoning all pretense at pride and begging her to tell me the truth that I saw in her eyes.
That all came to an end and pride went out the window when she called me to ask me if she could come over so I could look at the latest. Runes that had appeared on her back. I wondered briefly why she wanted me to see them in person when it would have been as easy to let one of the transgenics hold a video camera on them and then transmit the file to me. But I wasn't going to pass up the chance to be in the same room with her again and in fact I was going to do better than that. Ducking down to the corner convenience store I managed to find a bottle of bleach and heading back to my new place I quickly made up a solution of bleach and water strong enough to kill the nastiest of bugs, even a genetically engineered retrovirus. I had discussed the subject briefly with Beverly Shankar after my last bout with said virus and she had obligingly run a few simple tests assuring me that the bleach solution would work in a time of need. She had also supplied me with a box of latex gloves and advised me to wear them around Max. Max had made that precaution unnecessary by her actions but I had thrown the gloves into my bag when I left my apartment two steps ahead of White.
When Max walked in a few minutes later she glanced questioningly at the gloves I was putting on and I flippantly replied to her unspoken question "Basic CDC procedure."
"Yeah, to protect you against your biohazard girlfriend." She threw out as she seated herself on a chair and stripped off her vest preparatory to showing me the runes. My heart leapt at her words and then plummeted as she went on "I didn't mean that last part." Still there was something in the tone of her voice that gave me pause as I knelt down behind her.
"It's okay." I told her as I unzipped her and slid her top and bra straps down off of her shoulders to expose the runes, all the time thinking about how I had dreamt of doing such a thing but in completely different circumstances and for a very different reason. Unable to resist I gently touched the runes and I noticed the goose bumps on her skin at the feel of my gloved fingers. It wasn't cold in the room – if anything it was somewhat stuffy. I wondered if her thoughts were wandering in the same direction as mine and was sure of it with her next words.
"This is awkward." She observed and I tried to be casual as I replied,
"For me too." But at that point I was feeling anything but awkward. The truth was there for me to see. It was in the goose bumps on her skin, in the tone of her voice, in her reaction as I gently traced the runes. Finishing up with pictures of them I went to kneel in front of her and on impulse decided to test the conclusion I had come to. Her hands were crossed in front of her on the chair back and I reached out and gently began to play with her fingers as she ruminated on the purpose of the runes. After a startled glance at our linked hands her eyes met mine and I knew for sure. There was no Max and Alec, never had been and never would be. It was all there in her eyes. Just as I knew my feelings for her were there in my eyes for her to see. She let me hold her hand for a moment but then the Max I knew and loved kicked in and she was off leaving me to consider how best to proceed with my new knowledge. I didn't know what I was going to do but I knew I was tired of this game and was going to end it as soon as possible.
But then White saved me the trouble. As soon as I saw Max on television swooping in to Jam Pony I knew I had to be there. At the last minute I stopped and put on the exo. I didn't know what I was going into but it was a military weapon designed for combat use. I was a normal human mixing into something involving
humans with enhanced physical abilities and I might need every advantage I could find. Sure enough White turned the deal into an ambush and I thanked God for the exo as without thinking I threw myself into the fray my only thought that I couldn't stand there and watch Max take another bullet. I can't say I was upset about ending up inside Jam Pony with Max and crew. I had had every intention of getting on that bus with them if they had made it out there. No more sitting by my computer helplessly watching the woman I loved in the line of fire. This time I intended to stand shoulder to shoulder with her and her family. She had once told me I was her family as much as anyone and this time I was going to be there with them all.
Once I was inside Max and I fell easily into our old relationship offering each other support and strength as needed in the crisis. If the morning's events hadn't already told me that Alec was nothing to Max I would have known the minute she looked at me, not him, over Cece's body. Alec didn't even attempt to continue the charade, dropping back to talk strategy with Joshua and Mole, leaving Max to me. I knew it wasn't the time or place but I couldn't help the feeling of joy at being with Max once again, working together with her and seeing her turn to me to back her up. It was touch and go once White and his groupies made their move but I had the satisfaction of knowing that this time I was there with Max in the fight. Not to mention the sense of pride I felt at helping Alec out when the familiar female he was fighting was about to get the better of him. Unworthy I know but I never claimed to be perfect.
My real pride came later though when Max turned and rallied her people around her. "…I'm through running and hiding and being afraid. I'm not gonna live my life like that anymore…" Those words said it all to me. The girl I had met almost two years ago, the one who claimed to care for no one but herself had come full circle and had become a woman to be reckoned with. Looking around at the raised hands of her people I knew I was exactly where I wanted to be. This was the fight I had been preparing for all of my life and there was no way Max or anyone was going to send me away from it now.
When the transgenics had settled in for the night with the exception of the perimeter guards Max and I sat together on the rooftop of the building that had become the command center of Terminal City. I had slipped on a pair of the latex gloves and Max was wearing her leather biker gloves as a matter of course. For a while we just sat there in silence enjoying the rare sight of a clear sky filled with stars. Finally Max turned to me.
"Logan. About us…I mean about what I said to you…"She trailed off into silence again. I smiled at her.
"It's okay Max. I know. I know who we are." Unconsciously echoing the words I had said to her on that long ago night when the world had seemed to be in our grasp.
"No it's not okay. I wanted to keep you safe and instead I probably did you more harm than anything.
I'm sorry Logan. I didn't know." She turned away from me but not before I saw the gleam of tears in her eyes. Reaching out I gently took her chin and turned her to face me.
"Max. Listen to me. It's okay. I want to be with you in this, to stand by your side and fight by your side and even die by your side if it comes to that. Forget the past. We've both done our share of hurting each other but none of that matters anymore. Those people in there matter. Janelle's baby and Joshua and Alec and Mole, they matter. We matter but only when we've taken care of them. When that's done we'll figure this virus thing out. And if we don't we'll figure out how to live with it. Just promise me that your speech about no more running away included no more running away from us as well. That's all I ask."
She nodded and reached over to take my hand.
"Logan there's something I should have told you a long time ago." She hesitated and I sat silent knowing she had to do this on her own for it to mean anything. "I love you Logan." I came close in that moment to reaching down and kissing her but instead contented myself with twining my fingers more closely with hers and squeezing her hand.
"I love you Max." Words spoken, vows exchanged, we sat there together in the most broken down part of the broken down city called Seattle. Overhead the Space Needle towered and the stars shone and I knew that for that one moment in time everything was exactly as it should be. In the words of my mom,
"The universe is right on schedule" and I knew that I had finally found my place in it.