A/N: I just wanted to apologize for not updating my stories! I've just had a lot going on lately and I unfortunately didn't have enough time to update them...I promise to update them soon. This is a bunch of one shots...with alot of humour in them
"You go first Ria!" Kelly said and pointed to a large bin with every wwe superstars name in it.
"Me? Why?" Maria took a step back...Nervous of whos name she might pick
"Because your older then me...." Kelly gave Maria a puppy dog look
"Ugh! Fine....Honestly Kels...If I pick your boyfriend...dont get angry" Maria groaned and reached into the bin
"So what if you get John? He's easy to shop for...." Kelly smiled
Maria closed her eyes and pulled out a name....She played around with the folded paper in her hands
"Kelly here....Tell me who I picked" Maria handed Kelly the paper
Kelly rolled her eyes and slowly opened the paper
Her lips opened as she slowly erupted in laughter
"What? Kells is it that bad?" Maria cringed
"S-S-Santino...." Kelly said catching her breath
"NO WAY! KELLYYYYYYY" Maria whined
"My turn...." Kelly reached into the huge bin and pulled out a name
There written on the paper in fancy elegant script said the name
Mickie James
Kelly's usually calmed blue eyes flashed
"MICKIE JAMES! ARE YOU SERIOUS?!" Kelly clenched her hands into a fist
"Oh Kells.....I know you two have had problems...." Maria said
"PROBLEMS? SHE HAS BEEN ADVANCING ON JOHN FOR MONTHS!" Kelly's voice raised about 5 decibals
Maria cringed at the tone and volume of Kelly's voice
"THIS IS SO NOT FAIR! HOW COME YOU AND JEFF NEVER HAVE THESE ISSUSES?!" Kelly asked
"Because no one wants to take Jeff from me..." Maria said quietly
"I know exactly what to get the Queen of Bitches......" Kelly's voice became deep and a sly smile spread
across her face
XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX
Chris Jericho whistled as he walked down the hall towards the huge bin
He stopped for a minute before reaching into the bin hoping too pull out a decent name
and not a name of another "Ass Clown" Like last year
In another words.... John Cena
He pulled out a name and couldn't help but smile when he read the name on the paper
Y2J, King of the world, first undisputed Champion,....Chris Jericho
"HA!" Chris thought to himself "I know exactly what to get a handsome young man by the name of
Chris Jericho!"
XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX
"Whats Better? Maria? Snakes or Scorpions?" Kelly pondered
Maria raised an eyebrow at her best friend " Are we pranking Orton again?"
"NO! I meant..for...Mickie" Kelly mocked Mickie's nasaly tone
"Oh...Why?" Maria was still confused
" Well I got her for secret santa..so might as well have some fun with it!" Kelly grinned
Suddenly Jeff Hardy came into the room looking angry
"Hey Jeffers!!" Maria squeeled
"Hi Ria...Sup Kells?" Jeff's eyes were down
"Lemme guess you got someone disappointing for your secret santa" Kelly asked
"YES! Wanna know who I got?" Jeff asked
"I got nothing better to do...who?" Kelly ran a finger through her blonde hair
" VICKIE! VICKIE DAMN COW GUERRERO!" Jeff Errupted
Maria and Kelly looked at eachother for a second before Kelly giggled
"It aint funny!!" Jeff whined
"Jeff..its not that bad" Maria offered a smile
"NOT THAT BAD? WHO DID YOU GET?" Jeff asked
"Santino" Maria rolled her eyes
"Switch with me MARIA! PLEASE!" Jeff begged
"But why-"
"PLEASE MARIA...I WILL LOVE YOU FOREVER" Jeff was down on his knees by this point
"Jeez fine...here" Maria reached into her bag and handed Jeff the paper
"Thanks! I love you!" Jeff gave her a quick kiss, handed her the paper and left the locker room
"Okay what do you see in him?" Kelly laughed
"A lot....Trust me on that"
XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX
"Please be John, Pleaseeee be my Johnnerssss" Mickie sang as she reached into the bin
She pulled out a piece of paper and read the name on it.
Jeff Hardy
Mickie frowned when she read the name on the paper
"Who the hell is Jeff- Oh! That Rainbow guy" Mickie remembered now
Suddenly she had an idea she took the piece of paper and threw it in a near by trash can
Mickie found a scrap piece of paper in her bag and on it wrote
John Cena
She planted a kiss onto the paper and skipped off down the hall
XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO
"Jericho..Please explain to me how you pulled your own name?"
"Its simple... Clearly unlike you Cena, I am superior"
John rolled hes eyes and continued getting ready for his match
"So who did you pull?" Chris asked
"Some dude named Dolph Ziggler, I dunno who he is" John said
"Ha! Dolph? That guy CANNOT be straight" Chris Joked
John laughed "But what do you get a gay dude for christmas?!"
"Dont ask me" Chris asked "Oh and by the way Mickie was asking for you"
"UGH! I fricked Hate that chick!" John groaned loudly
"She..is kinda...dare I say..clingy" Chris was trying his hardest not to laugh
"WHY cant she accept that I love Kelly?" John asked
"Cause she wants you to love her..duh" Chris said drinking some of his water
"BUT I DON'T!" John yelled
"What am I? A therapist I dont know what to tell you..., Plus Cena you do have a history
with all of the divas" Chris pointed out
"ME? I am shocked!" John gasped
Chris sighed loudly and started the list
"Trish"
"Well I was 25..."
"Lita"
"I wanted to get back at Adam!"
"Stacy"
" She offered! Have you seen her legs?"
"Melina"
" That was a long shot"
" Kelly"
"I'm dating HER!"
"Candice"
"Oh...Good times...But we were...Young"
"Vickie"
"Okay, I was drunk, I saw brown hair I thought it was Candice!!"
XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX
"What is the most violent present you could give to someone...Legally?" Kelly asked
Hunter and Shawn both looked up at Kelly from their game of cards
"umm Why" Shawn asked
"Mickie" Was all she said
"Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh" Hunter & Shawhn both said"
"How about a BB gun?" Randy Orton asked as he came into the locker room
"you were eavesdropping weren't you?" Hunter asked
"Technically its not eavesdropping if I can hear you without trying" He smirked
"Can I shoot her with the BB gun?" Kelly asked suddenly excited
"NO!" All 3 superstars shouted
"Fine" Kelly Pouted
"Umm Kelly..." Randy began
"Yeah?" She asked
"What...what would you want...for Christmas" Randy was clearly nervous
"Well...I guess anything...why?" Kelly looked over and Randy
"NOTHING!! Its not like I got you for Secret Santa or anything!
well...umm Bye!" He quickly left the room
"Yeah, He really kept that secret" Kelly said
"Okay.. all of the secret santa gifts are due Tommarow! And I dont think anyone has gotten anyone
anything!" Shawn said
"Very True...Ill get Maria..We need the Mall!" Kelly said getting up to leave
XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX
The next day, The superstars and divas who had entered the secret santa started
distrubuting there gifts to everyone.
"So..Kelly what did you end up getting Mickie?" Maria asked
"Chocolate" Kelly said
Maria gave her friend a confused look "Huh?"
"Dont worry I spit on them and they arent really chocoloate" Kelly smiled
Maria opened the box and looked inside, "They look like chocolates"
"Well I can't take all the credit, Jeff is a great artist!"
"What are they?" Maria asked
"A mix of paper, cotton balls, Jeff's paint and Hunter's "lotion" Kelly said
"Eww what lotion?" Maria cringed
"He wouldn't say..but he did say it would leave a bad taste in Mickie's mouth" Kelly grinned
"Anyway. What did Jeff get Santino?
"Oh he just got him a razor" Maria said
"For the growth on his forehead?" Kelly laughed
"Oh look who's coming your way...Hey John" Maria waved
"Hey Baby!" Kelly said and went to kiss him
"Hey- Ohh Chocolate" John reached for one and popped it in his mouth before Maria and Kelly could say
anything.
Kelly put a hand over her mouth in shock
John chewed it around in his mouth for a bit "Hmm tastes interesting...something Belgian?"
Maria looked over at Kelly with her Jaw hanging open
"YEA! Belgain...from..umm Belgium" Kelly faked a smile.
Just then Jeff came towards them.."Maria!! Chris wants me to tell him your number!"
"Oh Lord..forget it...give him the number for.. Pizza he can use it" Maria said
"Okay..but I hate being your messanger- ooh Chocolate" he reached for it
"NO!" Maria quickly slapped his hand
" OWWIEEE..." Jeff cried
"Oh look. Mickie..I'll give her this" Kelly picked up the chocolates and went over to Mickie
"Why don't I get the yummy belgian chocolates!" John whined
"Please don't start..go give your present to whoever" Maria shook her head in disbelief
XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO
Kelly hesitantly went towards Mickie to give her the "chocolates"
"Oh Mickie..yeah Hi..Umm I got you for the secret santa thinger...so here" Kelly gave it to her
"Okayyy Well could you give this to Johnney for me?" She asked
Kelly's eye twiched but she forced a smile.."Johnney?" She said gritting her teeth
"Yeahhh I got lucky and Picked Johnners! Give this to him..thanks..TTYL!!" Mickie skipped off
Kelly looked at the wrapped box and went into the corner
She thought for a bit then decided to open the box
She opened it and saw a chain on it with a J
Kelly closed the box and took in a breath...."What he dosent know wont hurt him"
XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO
"MARIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"
Maria heard a voice singing her name...she cringed at the sound
"What Chris?" Maria rubbed at her temples
"Look what I got for Secret Santa!" He showed her a picture of himself holding the world heavyweight
championship wearing the world's cheesiest grin.
"Chris who in their right mind would give you a picture of yourself?" Maria asked
"Actually a handsome yound gentleman by the name of Chris Irvine" He grinned
"You pulled yourself?!" Maria groaned
"I think this Chris Irvine needs me to send him a thank you card...YEAH a thank you card with a picture
attached!" Chris walked off
Maria just shook her head
"MAN! I really need to find new friends!"
A/N: The End! Random ideas I know...anyway R&R please next chapter the superstars start a dating game...oh lord :P enjoy