"Master Will, she wishes to speak with you," Sophie said, a little sourly. She stood in the doorway of his room, at the Institute - he couldn't bear to go to the church and watch the woman he loved be handed off to, of all people, his parabatai. "You need to go."
Will's eyes narrowed. "And why do I need to go, Sophie, hm?"
"She wishes to speak with you," she repeated, then turned and walked away, most likely to the carriage that brought her back here. With a huff, Will set A Tale of Two Cities down on his bed and followed after Sophie.
When he walked through the great cathedral, he was surprised to see it completely filled, not an empty pew in sight. All Shadowhunters? Will wondered, but once he entered the room in which the bride was to get ready, any sarcastic thoughts that might have followed flew out of his mind. Tessa sat on the floor in the middle of the room, her head hanging, her palms set limply in her lap. Will hurried to her side and crouched before her. "Tessa," he said, and winced at how loud he had spoken. It seemed to echo in the dull silence. In a whisper, he repeated her name. "Tessa, what's the matter?"
She raised her head. Her eyes were bloodshot red from crying, her lower lip trembling as she tried to keep the tears back now. With a thick voice, she said, "I'm getting married today, Will." His jaw clenched, and his heart constricted between his ribs. He opened his mouth to reply when she continued, "And you weren't here, Will. Why not? Why didn't you come?"
He averted his eyes, breaking the contact between them. He fell back on his heels, sitting on the floor beside her. Their shoulders brushed. "I couldn't bear it" was all he said.
"You couldn't bear it?" Her voice, though still a whisper, rose in exasperation. "What about me, Will? You think I can bear this? Any of this?"
He looked at Tessa from the side, frowning. There was something in her expression that he couldn't understand. "What-?" He shook his head. "Tessa, you love him. Why wouldn't-"
Tessa's cold laugh cut him short. "Yes, I love Jian." Will jumped; since when did she start calling Jem by his birth name? "But I don't love him. Oh, God, Will. I tried to. I really did. But I can't love Jian. I don't love him."
Will looked down at his scarred hands. The world around him started spinning and he didn't know which way was up, which way was down. Was it really Tessa that sat beside him, saying these words to him? Or did he just forget that he had gone to The Devil's Tavern that morning and become so intoxicated that he began hallucinating? "What are you-?"
And then her lips were pressed against his, and Tessa filled his thoughts. Tessa, Tessa, Tessa. His hands went to her hair, and he murmured her name into it. "Tess."