I'm Not Crazy, a kim possible fanfic

"I'm not Crazy"

By Eoraptor

Kim walked through the corridors of the expanded Possible Enterprises, but, it was not her normal purposeful stride.

Every time she turned down a corridor or entered into one of the zones, someone would suddenly be quiet, and there were suppressed titters everywhere. And of course, various digital devices were blacked out, or switched over, or turned away from her.

She was beginning to become very paranoid about what was going on in her heroic little empire after she passed through Vivian Porter's robot labs and all the androids stopped beeping, and she didn't mean the phones.

But when she walked into Wade's laboratory and he changed his primary display ~to~ Solitaire from something else, she finally could not handle it any more.

"Wade Salloin Load! You show me what you were looking at this instant, or I am going to call your Mother!"

The computer hacker paled visible, clearly caught in the age old dilemma between redheaded wrath, and mom wrath. Finally, with a reluctant groan, Wade switched the screen back.

On the screen, obviously from a few years prior, was Kim Possible, twenty-something heroine, standing in a photo. That in itself would not be notable, as Kim had always been photogenic and there were thousands of pictures of her out there.

Except that this Kim was slightly stopped over, with a cotton cloth wrapped in her mouth, with drool trailing down one side of her chin. Further, her body was trussed up in an old cotton straight jacket which she was clearly trying to release herself from, and her long legs were bare; leaving one to wonder if she had, well, anything on other than the restraints.

Kim gasped at the sight before her, and then pinched the bridge of her nose softly. Wade lived in fear of her reaction, until her heard her softly chuckling behind her hand.

"She told me she deleted that picture."

Wade's inquisitive hacker nature took over, and before he could stop himself he was asking, "So this is Shego's doing?"

Before long, Kim sat down, and explained the tale to her hacker friend. The tale of how she and Shego had been sitting, and discussing legal morays, as they had been prone to do in the early days of their relationship, given their rather opposite views of the system.

At some point the conversation had turned to the concept that women who were on their periods were once considered incapable of providing testimony at trials, and in some more… rustic nations, still were.

Of course Kim, a liberal college student with the mindset to match, had taken off at length on that idea. And Shego, being the anarchist who loved to needle people, and utterly unfazed by anything her paramour said, challenged right back that she damned sure wouldn't want "any woman on the wrag testifying against her, seeing as they could turn into such moody vindictive bitches."

She said this, knowing it would only set her fiery girlfriend's redheaded temper off more, because she loved to drive her to the point of combat and then have her way with her. And because, thanks to her plasma powers, she did not suffer a reproductive cycle.

The discussion continued to rage and roil, with Kim now off on a rant and Shego only stoking the fire by playing Devil's advocate in her calm, dismissive, and devoutly snarky manner.

At some point, the discussion made its way around to the treatment of the mentally ill through history. Shego made a comment about how difficult it was to get out of an "I-love-me" jacket back when they weren't designed with patient comfort in mind. Kim, of course, being a heroine, an escape artist, and a redhead, challenged that she would have no problem escaping such a garment.

Well, of course, who knew that Shego had a canvas straight jacket with brass buckles dating from about nineteen fifty eight?

Kim, who had been, prior to the discussion, in a night shirt and panties and enjoying a glass of sweet red wine, found herself trussed up. And of course, Shego decided to add insult to restraint, by informing her problematic young lover that because she was shouting so much, that like any wild woman she was going to be gagged for her own protection.

Well, of course Kim, long used to being restrained by Shego (and here she left out that it was not always involuntarily, because Wade did not need to know that about the two of them) immediately set about freeing herself.

Well, she worked up a good sweat fairly quickly, which explained the matted chaotic hair in her picture. That lead to increased breathing… through her gagged mouth… which was why she was drooling like a, well, like a lunatic. As to why her long pink night shirt was not visible in the shot? Well she attributed that to the fact that she had already gotten the lap strap free, disguising the cotton-candy pink tails of her nighty, when she heard the telltale synthetic click of Shego's camera phone going off.

That click was why she was looking up in a mixture of horror and righteous wrath in the image on Wade's screen.

"But I'll tell you one thing Wade…" Kim concluded the tale as she chuckled at the image on the screen…

A little while later, a new version of the photo began to make the rounds, complete with a quote from Kim emblazoned across it;

"I'm not crazy! My wife had me tested."

AN: Something I found in my cookie jar file and cleaned up for laughs, originally scribbled out in early 2012 in response to a writers' challenge on the KP Slash Haven. Reviews earn a smile and a thank you :)