The Perfect Day by Penguin
I seriously haven't written anything in a long while, but, whatever.
Reviews make my kidneys very happy. :D
Warning/s: Hisoka-angst. Bucketfuls of it. A story that goes around in circles. Piss poor attempt at prose infused with lyricism. D:
Summary: What is a perfect day? Ask Hisoka. ---- Hisoka forgets about Tsuzuki completely but he is slowly remembering. (Angst, implied romance. Oneshot.)
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--- What is a perfect day?
It is a day when everything goes right.
It is a day where you know you can't possibly get upset because you have everything you could ever want and you know that, when you wake up the next day, it will all still be there.
A perfect day is a day when once, just for once, you forget about your problems. On this day, you forget about the hurt surrounding the world around you and live your own life, as you would like it to be.
--- That's the perfect day.
For lucky Hisoka Kurosaki, all of his days were perfect.
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"Hisoka, go away. Now," he said, urgently. He kept looking over his shoulder, as if running from an unseen predator.
I looked at him and stamped a foot on the ground. Looked at him defiantly. Crossed my arms over my chest. Tried to act strong. Fought off the tears rising to my eyes and the despair trying to reach my voice. Why won't he tell me what's wrong?
"No."
"But He'll… Hisoka, don't be stubborn!"
"I made a promise. I'll go wherever you will go."
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Morning dawned clear and bright. Sunlight wafted through the blinds of Hisoka Kurosaki's windows, coloring his room a bright yellow.
He could've gone on sleeping at least an hour more had not his foster brother woken him with a pinch to his nostrils.
"Oi! Hisoka, wake up. We're going to be late for school and it's all going to be your fault!"
That woke him up. Biting his lip, he threw the pillow at Hijiri disdainfully. Hijiri Minase, Hisoka's foster brother (for as long as he could remember; he had no recollections of life before Hijiri) pretended to be angry for a minute before breaking out into a big grin.
Hijiri… Hisoka thought, is a nice guy although there's something about him that puzzles me. Something about that smile of his that tells me he's hiding something.
And, for a split second, he remembered.
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"Hijiri, please, help us," he rasped, out of breath.
The boy's eyes widened when he saw the man nearly half-dead and carrying an unconscious boy in his arm.
"What —?"
"It's about Hisoka."
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Life at the Minase household was pretty mundane. Hijiri lived alone in his own apartment; he said his parents just sent over money to pay for their needs but they were both working at another country.
Yes, Hisoka had known them when he was young.
Yes, they all lived together.
No, they didn't pick you up from a street corner.
Yes, they love you.
Yes, they'll be back soon, someday.
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I blinked and squinted at the face looking at me. It was… Hijiri's…?
"Hey, Hijiri… where's Tsu —" I stopped when a mind-blowing headache assailed me.
Hijiri looked out his window — he had always seemed so lonely — and shook his head.
"He won't be back for a while."
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Hush; let me tell you a secret.
Just between us.
Hisoka?
He could… well, he could… don't you dare tell anyone, but sometimes — just sometimes — he can sense how other people are feeling. Like when Hijiri's upset, he'd ask what was wrong. Hijiri didn't seem to mind it much and wasn't surprised at all when Hisoka would act like that, but the people at their school thought otherwise.
So whenever Hisoka would pick up on other people's feelings… well, he kept quiet.
It'd upset him if other people knew so, please, don't tell a soul.
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"Where are we going?" I asked Tsuzuki. I was trying hard not to cry. I was so, so, goddamn confused but he wouldn't tell me a thing. "Does this have anything to do with the latest case?"
Our latest case. Our last case.
We were supposed to escort an 'enlightened' soul back to Meifu. Now I know that when Chief says 'enlightened', he means 'ready to kill, unusual, unlike other people, cult leader, psycho-extraordinaire — just like Muraki, maybe'.
But the girl had tried to act innocent and inspired our sympathy. Twisted facts. Manipulated us.
Tsuzuki, the soft-hearted fool that he is, let her go.
How could he have known that she wasn't human?
How could we have known that she'd have killed tens, dozens, hundreds of people before we'd catch her again?
And how could we have known what the repercussions of our actions were?
Tsuzuki spoke, his voice snapping me from my reverie. "We're going to Chijou." He looked at me longingly and whispered, "I'm sorry, Hisoka."
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He sobbed into his pillow.
Oh, God, it hurt so much…
Hisoka gnashed his teeth and buried his head deeper into the pillow.
Faint, red calligraphy lingered on his skin.
…Why?
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"Tsuzuki, don't leave me! Please!" I begged, crying. "You — y-you can't," a sob, "do… t-this to m-me!" I cried out.
He kept walking. Slowly, sluggishly, as if burdened.
I wanted to stand up, run to him, but my knees felt weak and I couldn't stand. When I did try it, I ran headlong into a barrier. He had set up a ward.
I came tumbling back with an impact and it was then that he turned. His eyes were heavy with tears and the corners of his mouth — so often found curved into a smile — were curled downwards. He stared at me, closed his eyes for one long moment… willing to remember the moment forever.
"Hisoka."
And that was his goodbye.
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Sometimes scenes flashed before Hisoka's eyes. Scenes he couldn't quite recall, scenes that made him smile, scenes that confused him, scenes that made him feel both nostalgic and depressed.
And always, always a brown-haired man with purple eyes staring at him passionately. Every scene that unfurled before his eyes had that common theme.
…but why?
He had no answer.
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JuOhCho has many winding halls, foreign corridors, secret passages and concealed posterns, as Tsuzuki had once said. It takes more than the common eye to spot them. All Shinigami are forbidden entry to these secret passageways, unless given express permission. I've been curious about it for a long time, but Tsuzuki said it was hopeless to try to explore by myself because I'd just get lost in the labyrinth.
"Tsuzuki Asato! Kurosaki Hisoka!" A deep voice bellowed. Everyone stopped whatever they were doing and stared in our general direction.
From the corner of my eye, I thought I saw Tatsumi weep.
Chief wiped his forehead with the back of his hand. He looked… almost guilty. He motioned for us to follow him. He led us to a shifting wall, which revealed a passageway, dank and foreboding. He made us go through that and led us to another shifting wall, which led to a clean corridor this time.
Chief waved for us to come into a room. Tsuzuki looked afraid. I was confused, but I had enough sense to know that this wasn't a good thing. Chief followed us all the way to the door, looking very somber. I nervously turned the doorknob and stepped into the room. Tsuzuki followed, and Chief softly shut the door behind us.
We entered a big yet barely furnished room.
A young man in a sleek, black suit was standing with his back turned from us.
"Enma DaiOh." Tsuzuki intoned.
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Hisoka was pretty popular at school. Girls and boys hit on him left and right. He had dated a few people, and you could say he sort of enjoyed it, but it didn't feel right.
And so, he made excuses.
"I don't like you anymore."
"You changed."
"It's not you—it's me."
"I guess I'm not into dating anymore…"
"I'm sorry, it just doesn't feel right."
And when he was especially angry:
"I hate you — you annoy the hell out of me. You nag too much. Too dramatic, too weak. Idiot!"
His boyfriend had left the room in tears when he said that. Hisoka felt bad about it and wished he had shown more tact. The words echoed in his mind.
Idiot.
Idiot.
Idiot.
The word felt familiar, as though he was used to saying it although he knew he wasn't.
Not quite knowing why, he cried.
For everything he might have lost.
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Broken, broken — everything was broken!
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Burgundy eyes haunted, lingered. Made Hisoka feel nausea so intense that he had to excuse himself to retch.
A doctor, a well-versed and ridiculously famous surgeon (also a leading figure in the field of genetics), had come to their school to give a talk that day. They seated all the students in the school auditorium.
Hisoka sat in his usual place beside Hijiri.
The doctor looked like an albino with his striking, white hair and red eyes. Girls swooned over him and boys were casually remarking that he was 'pretty cool for a doctor'.
But when the good doctor's eyes roamed over the room, settled on Hisoka and flickered, Hisoka felt sick to the stomach. A burning sensation swept over his entire body and he buried his head in his arms, willing all the pain away.
There is no such thing as 'coincidence'. Everything happens for a reason.
What you perceive is not always the truth. Reality may be stranger than fiction.
In the same sense, genetics is not what it seems as first. It is not a tiresome thing that only intelligent people can understand. With the right mindset and attitude, you too can be adept at it. No two people have the same genotype and phenotype, proving that every person is unique, and…
The doctor continued his speech, winning everyone over with his charisma.
Well… everyone but Hisoka. He wasn't fooled. He got up and walked out, careful not to let anyone but Hijiri notice.
What Hisoka didn't notice, however, was that the doctor's eyes trailed him as he left.
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"Tsuzuki Asato. Kurosaki Hisoka. What you two have done is unforgivable. The repercussions are dire and…" He snapped a finger. "…and, rest assured, I will break you as punishment for what you've brought about."
I shuddered. I couldn't feel a single emotion of his. As Enma turned his face at different angle, I saw the delicate features of his face change into something sharper, harsher. I was watching his very features morph!
Tsuzuki lifted a hand.
"The boy had nothing to do with it. It was all my fault."
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Hisoka sat under a wide, cherry blossom tree. Half an hour had passed since he had walked out, but he didn't suppose that the lecture was over.
It turned out he was wrong.
He heard soft footsteps and lifted his head. He saw the albino-doctor. Hisoka stood up, as if to leave, but the doctor pinned him to the tree.
"How nice to see you, Hisoka."
"…Do I know you?"
The doctor lifted a hand and traced a finger down the curvature of the boy's chin.
"My doll, that's a very rude thing to say. But… I don't suppose you remember, do you?"
Hisoka bit his lip and squeezed his eyes shut.
"You don't remember what happened. How you can forget Tsuzuki escapes me." He sighed. His sigh was deep and heavy, and Hisoka caught the misery imbued in it. "But I'll make you remember.
"I am Muraki."
Muraki went on, gripping Hisoka's throat. The words got muddled around in the boy's brain, and he tried to digest it all when something he had not used for a long time snapped open —
Pain, hate, anger, greed, desire, pain, lust, lust, lust, hate, anger, pain, pain, --- EMPATHY!
Muraki drew his face closer to his and snarled something into his ear. Hisoka tried to act strong and looked at Muraki in the eye, but pain blurred his vision.
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Broken, broken — everything was broken!
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There was blackness.
He felt arms grip his sides and he let out a soft groan. His arms hurt.
Slowly, he opened his eyes.
And Remembered.
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He was back in his bed. He had been beaten up pretty badly, Hijiri said, and the bruises all over his body proved it. Hijiri wondered aloud how anyone could have done such a thing, especially to Hisoka, who was generally well liked.
Hisoka kept silent and shook his head although he knew who had done it and why.
An awkward silence ensued.
"…Hijiri?"
"Yeah, Hisoka?"
"…Why didn't you tell me?"
"Didn't tell you what, exactly?" Hijiri asked, genuinely confused.
"About Muraki."
"Eh? Muraki-sensei, the lecturer today?" Hijiri laughed. "I didn't know who he was until today's lecture. He's kind of cool, but scary, too. I mean — look at all that white! He could be mistaken for an angel."
But reality proves him a devil, Hisoka thought, but said something quite different.
"No… I mean, why didn't you tell me about Tsuzuki? About… about what happened."
Hijiri's grin faded and the corners of his mouth curled downward in a frown.
"They didn't want you to know."
"That's absurd!"
"Hisoka… there are some things you shouldn't question. There are some… some… things… that would benefit you if you didn't know it at all. Or if you forgot."
Hisoka curled a lip in disgust. "But I remembered!"
His 'foster brother' (Hisoka thought the words to be revolting now) bowed his head and mumbled. "It would've been better if you didn't remember."
Angry and frustrated, Hisoka rose from his bed and stamped a foot.
"You have to tell me everything that happened! The whole truth — I don't want any barefaced lies this time!" He yelled. Hijiri looked up, his eyebrows knotted together with worry. His 'brother' shook his head, took his cellphone from his breast pocket, and dialed a number.
"I'm sorry, Hisoka."
I'm sorry, Hisoka. —Where had he heard those words before?
--- I'm sorry, Hisoka.
------ We're going to Chijou.
--------- Hisoka.
------------- Hisoka.
--------------- Tsuzuki, don't leave me!
Broken, broken — everything was broken!
Hisoka cried out in agony and clutched his hair. Strands fell out but he tugged harder all the more. Anything to distract him from the pain of remembering all that he had lost. It hurts.
Hijiri started talking on his phone, oblivious to Hisoka.
"Tatsumi-san? Yes, it's me, Hijiri. What? Oh, yeah, it happened again."
Again!
The word repeated itself in Hisoka's head, a tormenting cacophony of repetition. Again, again, again, again! He couldn't make out Hijiri's words properly now.
"…usual… administer dosage… no, no trouble at all… here in what, 10 minutes? …no… all right, thank you."
He hung up.
Hisoka lay on the floor, eyes spewing mercurial tears — slow, thick and heavy.
Hijiri shook his head and started to talk to Hisoka, although the other boy wasn't listening.
"Don't worry. Tomorrow you'll forget everything and you'll be happy again. Tomorrow… tomorrow will be a perfect day for you."
Hijiri didn't understand! How could he be happy without Tsuzuki?
"Tsuzuki…" he moaned, before passing out once more.
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No, no, no, no!
Enma's lips curled into a smile.
"Wouldn't that be wonderful? A new life for the boy in exchange for what I want from you."
"It's sealed, then?" Tsuzuki asked, his voice faltering.
"Yes. Take the boy to Chijou."
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Life was never fair.
He saw things happening around him but he was powerless to do anything. Tatsumi stood over him, eyes closed and sheets of fudas clasped in his hands. He started to chant.
And the shadows started to dance around him.
"T-Tatsumi… you… too?"
Tatsumi's eyes flew open, and, for a few seconds, Hisoka saw the guilt but it was cloaked again and the Kagetsukai chanted faster.
In a singular moment, everything was black again.
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"I wish it didn't turn out this way."
"But you'll forget about me. They'll make you."
"I won't let them."
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Morning dawned clear and bright. Sunlight wafted through the blinds of Hisoka Kurosaki's windows, coloring his room a bright yellow.
First thought upon waking up:
--- My head hurts so much! Why?
Second:
--- Urgh, I feel sick. I'm gonna retch.
Third:
--- …Something… something is missing.
Fourth:
--- What makes a perfect day?
And, lastly, the fifth:
--- Who the hell is Tsuzuki?
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And another day goes by.
And another, and another.
Fourth day.
Girls and boys hit on Hisoka left and right.
His foster brother, Hijiri, had a concert. Hisoka sat front row and cheered the loudest.
Came home and threw a party for Hijiri. It was also his birthday today.
Hisoka shared in Hijiri's happiness, wrapped it around him tightly like a fur coat.
And something struck him. It was looking at him full in the face, reminding him of something.
…Cake. Hijiri's birthday cake.
All of a sudden, cake seemed profoundly important to him.
Cake… it was someone's favorite food… it was… it was…
Whose favorite food was it again?
…
…
…
He couldn't remember.
Uh, I s'pose I'm done now. XD
The scenes in italics (w/c are actually flashbacks) might be confusing, but don't be fooled! They are in no set order and just serve to mess the sto — er, to explain what happened before the present events. Aaah, messed up the text formatting! -seppukus-
Please leave a review. :D -begs-