Darth Vader Meets a Fuzzy Alien
Disclaimer: I, yet again, do not own anything affiliated with Star Wars or George Lucas etc…
Note: strange furry creatures and an evil 8 foot tall sith with a light saber we can only guess the outcome. Force protect us all…
Vader could only stare at this three foot tall, fat, impish creature. It was jabbing at his knees with a crude spear. Vader's anger rose every time the little bugger put another scratch into his beloved armor. He let the thing continue on for a few more seconds then decided to take action.
Vader pulled out his light saber and watched as the little, thing fell over backwards in shock. Vader started to chuckle to himself inside at the pathetic thing's antics. It was just a light saber grip. Vader ignited the Light saber and laughed openly when the little twerp screamed and ran away.
Still laughing Vader put his light saber away, and for lack of a previous engagement followed the fluffy thing.
It wasn't hard to track the little blighter as all Vader had to do was follow a narrow frequently used trail. It brought him to a large clearing the path didn't lead out of the space so Vader dumbly walked directly into the middle of it and stood there looking around.
With a shrill battle cry the fuzzy miniature Wookie released a rope from a nearby tree. The resulting action, swept Vader off his feet and into a strangled uncomfortable space in the lofty tree branches.
"Just great!" Vader said to the little thing laughing and howling below him. After many attempts to reach his light saber which lead to more entanglement, Vader stopped struggling.
Soon after the little alien produced a small primitive ax, with it the thing cut Vader down. Who yelled and fell a long distance into a large bunch of ferns. Vader was beginning to hate his vacation. It was turning out much like the last one.
He wasn't in the ferns for a long time. Soon several hundred of the Aliens came and began to drag Vader off to the east.
Once there he was appalled when they hung him over a huge bonfire. Then they started to chant and dance to the cacophony of many strange and lame musical instruments.
The commotion brought the attention of three humans who appeared from a small building structure. Princess Leia, his son Luke, and Han stood in shocked silence. Then Han in a fit of anger picked up a handful of sizeable rocks.
"Haha. How do you like it?" Han yelled to Vader then proceeded to chuck a rock which landed square on Vader's chest plate causing a button to start blinking red instead of green. "Hey fifty points if you hit his head!"
Luke and leia looked at each other and shrugged. Then also proceeded to pick up and chuck rocks at Vader. Soon the little Ewok's they had befriended took part and soon Vader was a scratched mess of dull armor plating.