Erebor, 27th November TA 2941

She swallowed her silent tears. She had loved him. How stupid can a girl get to love such a selfish brute? Must've been fanny-think all the way.

His piercing blue eyes, his powerful body, all that body hair, the regal bearing commanding everybody in his presence. Umh. All that gave her flutters in the nethers and damp underwear. And sleepless nights when she tossed and turned, thinking of the things they could do together, of what he'd do to her and she to him in return. Insulted and verbally abused she had come back for more as she could not leave him. Day dreaming of how she'd feel like a protected little bird in his powerful yet gentle grasp. How stupid can a girl get? She had more bruises from his "lovemaking" than she had from the battle. Not to mention those she got after admitting to have given the bauble to Bard.

So the greedy git had got himself killed. Good riddance to bad trash. Him and the two inbred twits. Good that nobody worthwhile from the Company had died. She turned away from the three bodies and never looked back.

()()()()()()()()()()

Shire, TA 2961

Billa looked at the disgusting little beady eyes of the dwarves before her. Had they come fifteen years ago ...

"So it took you twenty bloody years to drop by and see how I'm doing? Well, I'm doing fine, thank you, so you can be on your way."

"Who is this?" – Bofur pointed suspiciously at the young hobbit at her side.

"My son, Fel."

She giggled.

"Best thing which happened to me on the quest – had a wild party in Mirkwood on the way back." She patted her scowling son on the elbow, as he was a head taller than she.

"Don't know who the father was, so I called him Fel – the letters in "elf" moved around."

Her laughter was like a carillon of silver bells while the eyes of the dwarrows no longer expressed disapproval but passed through scandalised to disgust and revulsion.

Ori was the first to react. He hissed

"Elf-whore!"

and spat on the ground before the hobbits and marched away. Bofur, Gloin and Balin followed suit.

"I love you too, Azog's bum-boys! Go fuck an orc and never come back!"

"They won't be coming back, Ma?" – The blue eyed and raven haired giant asked.

"No, they won't come for you ever again. But keep on shaving anyway. That bum fluff does you no favours."