Just a short ficlet to celebrate the tenth anniversary of OTH. Very short, very much written on the fly. Here's to OTH!
She's not sure when she fell in love with him. She doesn't have a moment, that "A-ha!" feeling, that she can look back on to pinpoint as the moment she knew she loved him.
It'd be easy to say it was that first tutoring session on the docks, when he flashed a grin and slipped the Cracker Jacks bracelet on her wrist, her skin burning at his touch.
It'd be easy, sure, but it wouldn't be true. That morning she was more irritated by his confident, cocky persona than anything else. Perhaps it was the night he drove her from the party at his beach house, when she saw the hidden vulnerable side to Nathan Scott for the first time. Or maybe it was during their first date—set up by Brooke, no less—when all the difficulties of Lucas and Dan and Peyton and the hierarchy of Tree Hill High that dictated the Basketball Star couldn't be interested in Tutor Girl melted away and they were merely Nathan and Haley, two lost souls finding the missing piece.
Other milestones of their relationship are easy. She remembers the first time they kissed and how her blood rushed through her veins like a screaming locomotive, all her senses tuned to him and the way his lips pressed against hers. Their first fight, when they both hurled harsh words like weapons, each wound digging deeper into their hearts. The first time she thought she would lose him when she was on tour, her heart and soul screaming at the thought of never touchingkissingtastingloving him again. The first time she nearly did lose him, when her amazing, heroic, stupid husband jumped off the Molina Bridge to save Cooper and Rachel. When she got him back, haunted by inner demons only her love could heal. When she held their son for the first time, her heart nearly bursting with love for the tiny miracle she and Nathan had created out of love. When she held their daughter for the first time, her soul weeping with sheer joy at the realization that their little family was now complete.
All those moments, the heartbreak and the pain, the love and the ecstasy, are etched indelibly onto her heart. She can recall each with crystal clarity, the loveangerheartbreakjoypain nearly overwhelming her senses as if it was the first time all over again.
No, she can't pinpoint the exact moment she knew she loved Nathan. Sometimes, late at night when the rain is tapping a gentle rhythm on the window and the soft whooshwhoosh of his breathing is lulling her into sleep, she thinks that she can't ever know the exact moment because she has always loved him. She may not have always known his face or his name, but a secret part of her heart, the part that only he has ever touched, has always known.
fin