Monologue 1: Yukinoshita Haruno Answers Her Past.
"Of mankind, we may say in general they are fickle, hypocritical and greedy of gain." – Niccolo Machiavelli.
My moving eyes abruptly halted on that sentence.
I was in the middle of a lot of preparation for the things that were about to happen in the coming days; things that need my attention no matter how much I want to run away from it.
Even though I had stopped running long ago, it still comes back haunting to me sometimes.
As I organized my bookshelf, I found myself being attracted to this book.
I reached it out, opened the cover and began to smell it.
Ah! The old smell still lingers. The reason why I noticed this book amongst the many was probably because it stills remains a relic of my past.
Grandma brought me this book when I was in junior school. Took it as a book of education, I suppose. Not that I cared- never had any lack of books anyway. But, maybe, perhaps this fickle me longed for something more.
"Letters from a Fallen"
Cool title, bland book.
Even then I kept reading it. I did not understand the meaning of the words back then, nor the feelings neither its directions of how it was expressed. I was truly lost.
But then again, lost is truly the perfect word to define me. It still remains true now.
Back then, as a middle school, it was fairly tedious too. I had plenty of other fun things to do, so wasting my time on such a book wasn't the least bit productive to me. That's exactly why I closed this book.
That's exactly why I regret closing it to this day.
Despite, the many reasons of why I closed this book that day; me reading this book this late just now is a sign that I can finally complete it and then throw it out.
Throw one of the last remnants of my past. But then thinking about it, even more, I wonder if I can even throw this book?
I have grown up now or truly have I?
This book is an antique of my past. Even as an antique, it represents something which is mine.
Even though, this book probably too was given to me with expectations; expectations which I can't betray.
I wiped off the collected dust on the book and dropped it onto the couch. I look at my wristwatch, I still got some time.
I am pretty hopeful and excited about Yukino-chans university life. Pretty girl is still nervous about it, naïve but nice nonetheless.
At least someone is living her life her own way.
Fufufu.
Should take Hikitani-Kun for a coffee one of these days, I bet it will result in pretty interesting conversations.
I wonder why I feel so good and so refreshing when both of them are together. As if it heals me.
Go! Yukino-chan, I am looking out for you.
I wonder if I am smiling right now, a rotten smile at that. I am wondering about so many things these past few days.
Let's continue the book; continue on from where I couldn't back then, where I felt lost back then.
Because it's likely that I will never read this book ever again.
"Expectations are the mother of all frustration."
Heh! I like this book already.