Ok this is an updated version of the old fic Paige. R&R and be nice! thanks to Em for pointing out my mistakes! good on ya!
Jess :)
"Mum." Paige whispered as she sat beside the hospital bed. "Please don't leave me."
Rayleigh looked at Paige's face. She could see the sadness and the tears and she knew. She knew it was time to tell the truth.
"Paige." Ray placed her frail hand onto Paige's cheek. "I want you to have something."
"Mum?" Paige asked. "Don't speak. You need to rest." Paige lowered Ray's arm and placed it by her side.
"I need you to know the truth. Please take this." Ray reached her other arm over to the bedside cupboard and picked up an envelope. She placed it into Paige's hand and smiled. "Remember I will always love you. No matter what."
"Mum no." Paige cried as she watched Rayleigh slowly slip away to her death. "Mum." Tears flowed from her eyes. It was the first time since her father had died that she had shed tears. She never used to cry at all. She was always a strong child she never showed emotion. But at that moment she couldn't help but feel the pain. She just let the tears fall as she listened to the machine's long beep, which signalled that Rayleigh was indeed dead.
She watched as the nurses came in and covered Ray with a sheet then lowly wheeled her from the room. Paige waddled into the waiting room. She had nowhere to go now that Ray was dead. She had no family left.
She sat in a plastic chair and made herself as comfortable as she could then she looked down at the envelope in her hand.
"Paige!' She heard someone call her name. She looked up and saw her best friend Sam running towards her.
"Sam!" Paige replied and she stood. Sam ran to her and wrapped her in a very tight hug.
"I am so sorry." Sam let tears escape her eyes. "I came as soon as I could."
"She's gone." Was all Paige managed to say before she once again burst into tears.
"Mum says you can come stay with us until you make other arrangements." Sam told Paige as they hugged once more.
"I can't believe she's gone." Paige cried. "She promised she would never leave."
"Come on let's get you home. You need some rest." Sam's mother Cherie placed a hand on Paige's shoulder.
Paige didn't say anything. She just held the letter tight in her hand and allowed Sam and her mother to lead her away from the hospital.
Three weeks later, on the day of Ray's funeral, Paige was sitting at the desk in the study in Sam's house holding the letter in her hands. She had just returned from the service and burial and she was still very shaky. She slowly placed the letter on the desk in front of her and opened it carefully. She tipped the envelope up and a wad of paper and a silver locket fell out.
She picked up the locket and opened the small heart shaped pendant. Inside was a picture of a young woman who bared a major resemblance to Paige. The woman looked happy and she was smiling. Paige placed the locket down on the desk and began reading the letter Ray had written to her.
Dearest Paige,
If you are reading this right now it means I have gone. I know you must be feeling pretty awful right now. I know I would be but you have to remain strong. You have to move on with your life. I am not telling you to forget me but I am telling you to keep your life going. I wont like it if you stop living just because I have. You need to have faith in yourself. Somewhere out there is a life you are destined to live and my dying wish is for you to find it.
But before you do I have a bit of explaining to do. You see you may not believe this but it is true. I am not your birth mother. I know this may have come as a big shock to you but I adopted you after you were born. Your mother died whilst she was giving birth to you and as her best friend I promised I would raise you like my own child and give you a family to love you.
You're probably really upset right now but I need you to believe what I am saying. And I need you to promise me you will do what I am about to ask you to. This is really hard for me to say and I am sure it is even harder for you to read but it is true and there is nothing you can do to change it.
Your mother and I were good friends. We grew up together and we even lived together whilst she was pregnant with you. You see her parents were very upset when they found out she was carrying you. They got really angry and kicked her out of her home. So my parents offered to help her. My brother was also there for your mother.
Well he was until my parents sent him off to boarding school. Nobody would tell me why and I still don't know but that's a different story. My brother Patrick and I didn't speak that often. I think we only saw each other twice since you were born. We had a falling out when your mother passed away. It was to do with you actually. Your mother knew she was not going to make it through the birth so she asked me if I would adopt you and raise you as my own. However Patrick had a different idea. He wanted to be a part of your life. He would have too if it weren't for my parents. They stopped him from seeing you because they didn't want him ruining the life you had built with us.
When Peter died I was so close to telling you the truth and letting him into your life but I couldn't. Now however he is all you've got so I have no choice but to let him in. Please promise me you will find him for me. Promise me you will find him so you are no longer alone.
As you may know I have given you a silver locket. This is the locket your father gave your mother when they were younger. I am giving it to you because it contains the only thing left of our family. A photograph of your parents.
Show this to Patrick and he'll instantly know whom you are. He'll understand everything. Enclosed is also a photograph of your mother, Patrick and I together at my engagement party. Please give this to him when you see him. I'm sure he will know what to do then.
I must go for I have run out of time. Please remember that I will always be with you as long as your heart is beating.
Good luck. I will miss you forever.
Ray.
Paige placed the letter down and felt herself filling with anger but at the same time she was filled with sadness. Then she picked up the photograph that was in the letter. Sure enough there were three young adults standing together smiling. She turned it over and read,
July 12th 1986 Ray's engagement
Then below that was a name and address. Ray placed the photo into her purse then placed the locket around her neck.
"Ok Mum. I promise." She looked up at the roof. "I'll find him for you."
She scribbled a note on a piece of paper for Sam, grabbed her bag and headed for her old house to pick up some of her things before she left for the bus station.
Paige wandered through the streets of the town she had just arrived in.
It was all new to her. She had never been in the country before. She had lived in the city with Rayleigh-the woman she believed was her mother-for as long as she could remember. Her adoptive father Peter had died when she was only 6 years old and since then she formed a special bond with Rayleigh. They had been so close, doing everything together. She could always talk to Ray about anything everything; she could turn to her for advice, no matter what the problem was. Ray was her one-person cheer squad, support team, everything for her, always going to every performance, practice, game, anything that Paige had been interested in. Her friends had sometimes been jealous of the relationship that they shared.
Then tragedy struck when Ray was diagnosed with Cancer. When Ray started on the Chemotherapy treatments things were going well, until her body started to reject the treatments. The doctors tried everything to treat the cancer. However Ray's body just rejected every treatment they tried.
She was standing in the kitchen one night when she just collapsed. When Paige came home from school and saw her passed out on the floor she had acted quickly and rushed Ray to the hospital.
She was in hospital for three weeks before she finally passed away. The doctors had originally said that she wouldn't survive the night, but Paige knew that Ray had fought to stay with her, to spend just a little more time with her. They had talked when Ray was able, and she had stayed with her the whole time.
The reason that she was now here in the country and not the city was that Ray had made her promise that when she died Paige would find Ray's Brother.
So that's exactly what Paige did. She looked for her uncle. She found his address and searched for him. Now she was stuck in a little country town without any money or any place to go. She had stepped off of the bus only a few hours ago, and had spent the time just walking around the small town. She didn't know what she was doing there; she thought maybe she should just get back on the next bus and head back to the city, to her home.
"Hey." Someone walked up behind her and she jumped.
"You look lost."
She turned around and it was a guy in jeans and a black top. She looked the stranger over, she had seen his type before and knew that she should just get out of there. He was bad news. She turned and started to leave when he grabbed her arm and dragged her into a deserted lane.
"You ain't going anywhere." He pushed her arms back and threw her against a dumpster. Her Aunt had made sure that she had taken self-defence classes, saying that you never knew when they'd come in handy, and she sent up a silent thanks to her as her instincts and training kicked in. She waited till he was leaning in, and slightly off balance before she kicked him in the groin and pushed him away and he fell to the ground in a heap. She picked up her bag and she ran, her head was spinning and she was getting dizzy but she didn't look back or stop until she was well away from the lane, and could see a pub. She looked around then hurried in, checking the place out as she did. It seemed to be an ok place, safe.
She walked in and walked up to the counter and rang the bell.
"Hey. Can I help you?" Chris asked.
"Do you have a spare room?"
"Hold on a second and I'll check for you." Chris smiled and bent down. She stood up holding the bookings folder. "Just a single room?"
"Yes thankyou."
"Ok. Did you want to pay upfront?"
"Sure. How much?"
"$130.50 for two nights. That includes breakfast and dinner as well."
"Thanks." Paige pulled off her bag and put it on the ground. She bent down to open it and when she stood back up holding her purse her head was spinning even more.
"Oh dear. Are you all right?" Chris took a closer look at the girl standing in front of her, she was pale, shaken and clearly frightened. Even so she couldn't help thinking that the girl reminded her of someone. But she couldn't place who.
"I'm fine. It's nothing." Paige replied not wanting to worry Chris.
"Are you sure you're alright? You look a little pale."
"I'm fine. I'm just a little tired that's all."
"Well let's get you up to your room then." Chris walked around the counter and she had just got around when Paige collapsed.
"Oh no!" Chris cried and she rushed to Paige's side. "Hello?" She tried to wake her up.
She noticed Paige wasn't breathing. She acted fast and immediately called an ambulance. When she was waiting for the ambulance to arrive she bent down and tried to perform CPR.
"Hey Chris." Evan walked over to where Chris was bent down. "What's up?
"Oh Evan thank god you're here. She's not breathing. I called an ambulance and they're on the way."
"Calm down Chris." Evan bent down beside Paige and tested her pulse. "She's still alive" He turned her over onto her side to stop her from chocking on her tongue. He then sat with her and tried to revive her using the skills he had been taught during his police training.
The ambulance arrived shortly afterwards and the paramedics took over.
"What happened?" One of them asked.
"I don't know. She came in here asking for a room then she just collapsed." Chris explained.
"Did she say anything about what happened?"
"No." Chris replied.
"We'll have to take her to the hospital and run some tests." The first paramedic explained.
"Let's load her onto the stretcher." The second one instructed.
"On three."
"One, two, three." On three the paramedics lifted Paige onto the stretcher and wheeled her out to the ambulance.
"We'll need someone to come to the hospital and fill out forms." The paramedic informed Evan.
"I'll do it." He replied.
"Are you a relative?"
"No. I don't even know the girl." Evan replied. "But I'm a police officer."
"Ok. Well meet us at the hospital."
Evan followed them to the hospital where he sat waiting to find out what was wrong with the girl.
"Is the girl OK?" Evan asked when a doctor finally approached him.
"Are you Constable Jones? The one who found her?"
"Yes. Is she OK?"
"She's very weak. We've taken some blood to do some tests but we are still unable to determine what exactly is wrong until the results come back."
"When will she wake up?"
"She should be awake within the next 24 hours." The doctor replied.
"Thankyou." He followed her into the recovery ward and sat beside her bed.
When Paige awoke the next morning she panicked. She didn't know where she was. She looked around and took in her surroundings. That was when she noticed Evan sleeping in the chair by the window.
"Hello?" She asked trying to wake him up. Only her voice was croaky and very quiet. She licked her lips and ran her tongue around the inside of her mouth to create some moisture then she tried talking again.
"Hello!" She cried looking at Evan. He stirred a little but didn't wake up.
Paige lent over and pressed the call button hoping someone would come in and tell her who the mysterious guy was.
"Oh you're awake." The nurse smiled. "Welcome back. You gave us all a scare."
"Where am I?" she asked her voice a little croaky still.
"You're in the hospital dear. You had a nasty fall. The doctors have taken some blood for testing so we can find out what's wrong with you." The nurse explained.
"Who's that?" Paige looked at Evan.
"Oh. That's Constable Jones. Nice young bloke." The Nurse smiled. "He's been in here waiting for you to wake up. He's the one that called the ambulance."
"Oh." Paige replied.
"Would you like me to wake him?"
"Ah...i guess so." Paige replied. Paige watched as the nurse walked over and shook Evan's shoulder.
"Constable." She said softly. "She's awake."
"Huh?" Evan opened his eyes. "Oh right." He stood up and walked over to Paige.
"Hi." He smiled at her.
"Hi." She replied.
"How do you feel?"
"Sore." Paige told him.
"My name's Evan. What's yours?"
"Paige. Paige Matheson."
"That's a lovely name Paige. I haven't seen you around here before. Are you new in town?"
"Yeah. I came in on the bus."
"Are you visiting relatives?"
"Sort of."
"What do you mean?"
"I'd rather not talk about it right now."
"Oh ok. You need your rest. I'll come back later and you can explain then ok?"
"Umm I guess that's all right." Paige replied timidly not taking her eyes off the blanket.
"Well I guess I'll head off now. Get some rest and I'll be back soon ok."
Paige nodded and laid her head back on the pillows and tried to get some sleep.
Evan came back later that night when Paige was eating dinner.
"Hey." He smiled.
"Hi." She replied looking down at the food on her plate.
"Not hungry?" He noticed she hadn't eaten anything.
She shook her head.
"That's expected. Hospital food isn't exactly the greatest." She smiled and he took a seat beside the bed.
"Well I've been sent here to find out what happened to you. Mind if I ask a few questions?"
"Okay." She replied. She twirled the fork through the food.
"So Paige do you have any relatives I can call to let them know you're here?"
"Well I came here to find my uncle. Apparently my uncle is my only living relative. And he lives here."
"What about your parents?"
"Mum died when I was born. And I don't know who my father is."
"Who have you been staying with since you were born then?"
"Rayleigh. She's my adoptive mother." Paige closed her eyes to stop herself from crying. "She adopted me when I was born. She was Mum's best friend."
"Where is she now?"
"She died."
"Oh I'm sorry."
"It's not your fault. We all knew she was going to go. She had breast cancer and the chemotherapy wasn't doing anything to help her. Her body just rejected every treatment they gave her." Paige took a deep breath and started fiddling with her blanket. "Before she died she wrote a letter to me. She told me to look for her brother. She gave me a photo and an address and I decided to check it out. Since I had no reason to stay in Adelaide, I decided to catch bus here and check it out. Then when I got here some guy decided to attack me and I guess that's how I ended up here."
"Does your Uncle have a name?"
"Umm…. Patrick." She replied remembering everything her Aunt had told her about him.
"Ok. Well don't worry; I'll help you find him. But for now you need to rest. I've got to go to work but I'll be back later to check on you. You don't mind me dropping in do you?"
"No. It's nice to have someone to talk to."
"Ok. Well I'll be by after work."
"Bye." She waved and watched as he left her room.
Evan returned occasionally to check up on Paige. Not because he was a police officer and it was his job but because he felt like he connected with her.
"Hey." Paige smiled when Evan walked in one afternoon.
"How are you doing?' He asked as he took a set beside her bed.
"Ok I guess. I'm still a bit groggy but they said that it was nothing to worry about."
"That's great." He replied.
"So what did you want to talk about today?"
"Well it seems you know an awful lot about me I was thinking maybe we could talk more about you." She suggested.
"Ok. What did you have in mind?"
"Dunno." She replied. "How long have you been a cop?" She asked.
"About…4/5 years now." Evan replied. "But that includes all the training I had to go through."
"Did you have to do much training?'
"Yeah. Quite a bit. And let me tell you it wasn't easy."
"What sort of qualifications did you need to get into the police force?"
"Where do you want me to start?" He laughed.
"Ok. Different question. Why did you want to become a cop?"
"I don't know really. I guess it just runs in the family. My Dad's a cop, my brother used to work in the drug squad."
"Wow. I wish I had a cop in my family. As far as I know the most exciting job anyone in our family had, was a driving instructor."
"Boy I bet that was exciting." Paige laughed.
"Actually some of the stories he told were quite funny. But nothing was ever really exciting. I bet your family dinners were quite amusing."
"Not really. I mean sure we all had different crimes to talk about. But believe me it would have been so much better if one of us wasn't a cop. Then we would have at least had something other than police work to talk about over dinner."
"Ok... Different subject. Have you got a girlfriend?"
"Ok my turn to ask questions now." He changed the subject quickly.
"But you didn't answer my question."
"My turn." He said sternly.
"Okay." She gave up. "Ask away."
"Well seeing as I already know a lot about you I was thinking maybe you could tell me everything you know about your Uncle."
"Well there isn't much. Ray didn't tell me much but she did mention something about him living here and that he knew my mother before I was born. She gave me a photo a while ago when she told me about what happened to Mum."
"Do you still have the photograph?"
"I think so. Where's my bag?"
"Ah hold on a sec." Evan stood and looked in the cupboard beside the bed. "This it?" He held up a blue rucksack, which contained most of Paige's Belongings.
"Yeah. My purse should be in the front pocket."
"Here?" He asked pointing to a pocket on the bag.
"Yeah."
"Here." He handed her a black purse she opened it and pulled out a photograph of three people and handed it to Evan.
"Is that you?" He asked looking at the picture.
"No that's Mum."
"Who are the others?"
"The one on the left is Ray and on the right is Patrick."
"Where did you get this photo?" he raised his eyebrows when he saw the guy in the photo.
"Ray gave it to me. Is something wrong?"
"No. It's just...well don't get your hopes up but I think I know the guy in this photo."
"Really? How?"
"He works with us. His name is PJ."
"PJ?"
"Sorry that's his nickname. His real name is Patrick. Patrick Hasham."
"Hasham?" She thought for a minute. She had heard that name somewhere before. Then suddenly it clicked. "That's him. That's Uncle Patrick! Rayleigh's Maiden name is Hasham."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes I'm sure. I found out when I was looking through some old class photos of hers."
"Hey I'll tell you what. If you like I'll ask him to come in and see you."
"Really? Can you please?"
"Sure. It might take a lot to convince him though."
"Take the photo. Ray said to show him the photo and he'll understand.'
"Ok."
"I can't wait to meet him. I hope he can tell me about my mother."
"Well I guess I'll see you soon then."
"Yeah." She replied. "Oh and Evan?"
"Hmm?"
"Thankyou." She gave him a small kiss on the cheek.
"You're welcome."
He left the room leaving Paige to her thoughts.
"Hey I thought it was your day off?" Jo said as Evan walked through the door of the police station.
"It is. But I've got to talk to PJ about something."
"Oh ok. He's in his office."
"Thanks."
"Does this have anything to do with the reason you've been spending so much time at the hospital?"
"I'll explain later." With that he walked into PJ's office.
"Evan what can I do for you?"
"Well actually it's not me I need you to do something for. Does the name Paige Matheson mean anything to you?"
PJ's face went white.
"Excuse me?" He asked calmly.
"What about Rayleigh Matheson? Does that mean anything to you?"
"How did you...?"
"Here." Evan handed the photograph to PJ.
"Where did you get this?"
"Paige gave it to me. Does it look familiar to you?"
"That's Kerry." He replied. "How...? Where...?"
"Paige wants to see you."
"Where is she?"
"She's in the hospital."
"Oh God!" He gasped. "Is she...what happened?"
"She collapsed in the pub. She's fine now just a little groggy. And she wants to see you."
"But she...No this isn't right. Why is she here?"
"I don't know. I don't think I'm the one you should be talking to."
"Where is Paige? Take me to her."
"Ok PJ calm down. She's fine."
"Are you sure?"
"She's a little shaken up and she's had a few tests taken but apart from that she's fine. She just wants to see you."
"Ok. I'll see her." He closed his eyes and held the photo tight in his hand.
"Great."
"Where are you going?" Jo asked when she saw both PJ and Evan leave the office and walk towards the front door.
"Explain later." Was all Evan said before they disappeared.
PJ breathed deeply as he took the first step into Paige's hospital room.
"Patrick?" She asked looking at him.
"Oh My God!" PJ cried. "You...you look so much like Kerry.'
"You knew my mother?" Paige asked.
"We were best friends." PJ looked Paige up and down again. "I remember you. I saw you when you were a baby. When Ray adopted you I never thought I would see you again. Then when Ray died I never thought..."
"I remember you now. You were at Ray's funeral. You were up the back. You left as soon as the service was over."
"I...I didn't want anyone to see me. Ray and I...we had a misunderstanding a while ago. We haven't spoken to each other since then. Last time I saw her was when she adopted you. But you were only a baby."
"Well I'm all grown up now and I've come here to find you."
"Why? After all these years?"
"Well apparently now you're the only living relative in Australia."
"Oh." He couldn't think of what to say. "So...where did you get the photo?"
"Ray gave it to me. She told me it was taken before I was born."
"Yeah it was. This photo was taken when I was 30. It was at Ray's engagement party. I remember that day. It was the day we all found out you were going to be born."
"Wow. That was nearly 18 years ago."
"I Know. Your mum was so happy. She had always wanted to have a child and she believed that you were her little miracle. She loved you so much even though she only spent 10 minutes with you before she..." PJ stopped. He hated talking about it because it brought back all the pain he went through when she died.
"We didn't want you being raised by strangers so Ray adopted you. I suppose that was best. I would have but there were complications. That was what caused Ray and I to fall out. We haven't spoken since the day at court."
"Why did Ray get me and not you?"
"Well I couldn't. I tried so hard to look after you but every time I looked at you I saw Kerry and the pain of losing her just came back. I was afraid I wasn't going to be able to look after you properly. So I let Ray take you instead."
"I wish I could remember her."
"I try not to remember her. It hurts too much to think about her. Seeing you after all these years...you look so much like her."
"Really?" Paige lifted her head and looked at PJ. "Do you remember much about her?"
"Of course I do. She was beautiful. She had the most dazzling green eyes, really long brown hair and she always had a smile on her face."
"Was she pretty?" Paige asked.
"She was so beautiful. If I didn't know better I'd swear it was your mother I was talking too. You really do look like her. When I look at you I am reminded of her."
"Why did you leave her?"
"Well it's complicated. I always loved your mother. But she stopped loving me when she met someone else. When Matt came along things changed."
"What happened?"
"Well...when we were 16 your mother and I...we became a couple. We fell in love. As we grew older my love for your mother grew but her love for me diminished. I could see how much she wanted to be with Matt and I knew she no longer felt the same way I did. So I did the only thing I could think of."
"You let her go."
"Yeah. It was the worst mistake of my life. I had to sit back and watch whilst the woman I was in love with spent her time with another man. I saw the way he treated her and I hated him for it."
"So what did you do?"
"Nothing. I did absolutely nothing. For three weeks I avoided her. I didn't answer her calls because I was afraid I'd say something to upset her. Then one night she showed up at my door crying her eyes out."
"What happened?"
"The guy decided he would dump her and run off with some other woman."
"Oh. Poor Mum."
"That's not the worst of it. She had only just found out that she was pregnant with you. She didn't have anywhere else to go so she came to stay with us. She stayed with our family the whole time she was pregnant. We became good friends once again and we were even close to getting back together."
"Why didn't you?"
"My parents wouldn't let me. They sent me off to the Academy to keep me away from her."
"Why would they do that?"
"At the time I didn't know it but it was because they knew the truth."
"What do you mean 'the truth'?"
"I mean they knew who the real father of her baby was."
"Why would they need to keep you away from her if...wait a minute. Are you saying that they kept you away from her because you were the father of her baby?"
"That's exactly what I'm saying Paige. I've wanted to tell you that for years but I just haven't had the courage. I have missed you so much more than I can say. I wish I could have been there to see you grow up but things were...very complicated. I didn't even know you existed until the day you were born. Kerry called me telling me to come home and see her. She wanted me to be there for your birth. I got back home just in time to see her before..." He stopped and closed his eyes. "I was there holding you when you were just one hour old. You were so tiny. When I looked into your eyes all I could see was your mother. I tried so hard to pull myself together for you but I just couldn't. I wanted to be part of your life Paige I really did."
"I...I don't believe you. If you were my father you would have said something. You would have tried to keep me instead of letting someone else raise me."
"I wanted to Paige I really did. But I had just put my life back together after Kerry's death and by the time I was ready to have you in my life I was told I wasn't allowed anywhere near you."
"Why would Ray stop you from seeing me?"
"Because she didn't want you knowing the truth. She wanted you growing up with a mother and father who did nothing but love you. And that's exactly what Ray and her husband did. They raised you like their own daughter and then they decided they would tell you when you turned 18." He explained. "When Peter died she wanted to tell you the truth badly but she knew she shouldn't because of the pain you were both going through. And because you were still young she didn't think you were mature enough to handle the truth."
"What do you expect? Peter died when I was only 10. How would you react if the man you thought was your father died when you were that age?" Tears began to well in Paige's eyes.
"I know how you feel Paige but please just listen to me. I need to finish this for me as much as you."
"How dare you say you know how I feel? You have no idea what it is like to find out that the people you believed were your parents adopted you. I got told three weeks ago. Right after Ray died. I made her a promise. I promised her I would find someone to look after me. She told me you were her brother. She never told me you were my father. I didn't think I had any family left and now you tell me...." Paige trailed off, she tried to sort it out in her mind, but so much had changed so fast. "Can you just leave?"
"Paige I want to stay. I need to finish the story."
"No. I need you to go. I don't want to hear the story. I need to get my head around this."
"Paige..."
"Just Go." She turned her head away and closed her eyes tight.
PJ left the room reluctantly and Paige let out a sigh. She bit her lip and laid her head on her pillow.
"Hey." Evan said when he walked in.
"Hi." Paige turned to face him and wiped the tears from her eyes.
"Are you ok?"
"I'm fine."
"What happened? Did you find out what you wanted to?"
"I found out who my father is. Not that I wanted to. As far as I'm concerned Peter is the only father I'll ever have."
PJ was standing by the door and when he heard this heart was torn apart. He wiped a tear from his eye as he left the hospital.
"Did you want to talk about it?" Evan asked.
"Thanks. But I'd rather just leave it for a bit. I need time to get used to the idea."
"Fair enough. So...did you just want to sit?"
"Can I have a hug?"
"Sure." Jonesy put his arms around her and she held him tight.
"Thankyou for being here for me." She said through her sobbing.
"My pleasure." He smiled and kissed her head.
"You've been such a great friend to me since I've been here and I don't know how I can repay you." She asked, as they broke apart.
"Don't worry about it. You've given me someone to talk to. That's thanks enough." She hugged him again.
"Can you stay until I fall asleep?' She asked.
"Of course." He picked up her hand and held it as she lay back on the bed. "I'd love to stay as long as the nurse lets me."
"Thankyou." She smiled and closed her eyes. He held up her hand and kissed it softly. Then he watched as she slowly dozed off to sleep.
Three days later she was out of hospital and staying at the pub with Chris and Evan looking after her. She had started helping Chris out in order to help pay for her room and board as well as getting a little help from Evan. She had been avoiding PJ. Every time he came into the pub she made herself scarce and headed out to the kitchen to help Vini with something just so PJ couldn't talk to her. She still hadn't gotten her head around the fact that he was her father so she was trying to avoid talking about it. Although one day she wasn't quite fast enough to get away.
"You've been avoiding me." PJ said when he saw her carrying a tray of empty glasses back to the bar.
"What are you doing here? I told you I didn't want to see you."
"I know. But I want to see you Paige. You're my daughter."
"NO. I'm not your daughter I'm Paige Matheson. Peter and Rayleigh Matheson's daughter." She shouted at him. "And the sooner you realise that the better. Now if you'll excuse me I've got work to do." She walked behind the bar and into the kitchen.
"Hey Paige." Vini smiled when he saw her. "What can I do for you?"
"It's more what I can do for you. You need any help?" She asked.
"Ah. PJ's out there again right?"
"Uh huh." Paige nodded. Vini walked over and placed a hand on her shoulder.
"You know you've got to talk to him sometime. You can't keep avoiding him."
"Why not? It's worked for me so far."
"How much longer do you think it will work for huh? He's not going to give up."
"I know. But I just wish he would." She sighed. "What would you do if you were in my position?"
"Well I'm not in your position. Never have been so I would have no idea how you are feeling right now but...i think the best thing to do is talk to him. Get it all over with. Maybe that might make him give up."
"I cant. Ray only died a month ago. What am I supposed to do just forget her and go on to live a happy life with my new dad?"
"No I didn't say that. You don't have to forget Ray. She was your mother after all. But one thing you have to do is sort out this mess with PJ. Chris can't keep covering for you. It's not fair of you to put her in the middle of this argument. She's PJ's friend. And Jonesy. Have you seen him and PJ exchange any words other than 'Hi' in the past few weeks?"
"I guess you're right. I mean I don't want them to stop being friends with PJ just because of me. I'll talk to him. But only when I'm ready."
"Good girl. Now you need to get back out there and clean some tables."
"Yes sir." Paige smiled and left the kitchen.
Paige sat on her bed looking at the clock. She had woken up several hours ago it was now 3am and she couldn't sleep. She had been doing this every night since she had left the hospital. Her feelings were bottled up inside which was preventing her from sleeping properly because she was worried she would dream about what she had been told. She pulled out the photo of her mum and PJ and looked at it again. So much was going through her head, so much to sort out, to do. Everyone had tried to make her feel so welcome, to make her feel like she belonged.
She got up and paced for a while. She hoped it would help her to sleep but she just felt to alone to sleep. She needed to talk to someone about her feelings. She needed to get them out into the open instead of keeping them bottled up inside.
She pulled on a robe and tiptoed out into the hall. She slowly made her way next door to Evan's room. She knocked on the door softly. When she didn't get a reply she tried the handle. It was unlocked so she opened the door and crept in. she slowly tiptoed up to his bed and looked at him. He was curled up against the wall facing her, sleeping soundly. She carefully lifted the covers and slid into the bed beside him. She tried as hard as she could to get comfy without waking him up. Only it didn't work.
He opened his eyes and looked at her beside him.
"Hey." He smiled. "What are you doing in here?"
"I couldn't sleep. I figured you wouldn't mind me curling up with you."
He looked at her face. There was a slight gap in the curtains where the moonlight was peeking through lighting her face up. He moved his hand up and wiped a dry tear from her face.
"Something wrong?" He asked.
"Yeah."
"Want to talk about it?"
She nodded. Jonesy sat himself up and pulled her into him as she told him everything she was feeling about the situation.
"Then he just came up with all sorts of excuses for not being there for me. It's all just way too hard to deal with. Vini told me to talk to him but I just don't know what to say."
"It's ok. I'm here if you need any help."
"Thanks." She leant back into him and he placed his hand over hers.
"Feel better?' Evan asked.
"Uh huh." She nodded. "Thanks for listening."
"Anytime. I'm always willing to listen. Even if it is 4 in the morning." He laughed a little which made Paige smile.
"There that's what I like to see a smile."
"It's kind of hard to smile after everything that has happened over the past two weeks."
"Losing someone can be very painful."
"You can say that but it's just nobody will ever understand what it feels like to be betrayed. I grew up believing Peter and Ray were my parents. Then I find out after Ray died that she wasn't my mother. I was adopted. I just wish I could talk to someone who has been through the same thing. Someone that understands what it feels like."
"You know I've never told anyone this but I was adopted too."
"What?" Paige sat forward and looked at him. "Were you really?"
"Yeah. I found out who my birth father was right before he died."
"I'm sorry I didn't know I..."
"Nobody knew."
"How did you feel when you were told?"
"I was angry with both sets of parents. My adoptive parents because theyhad kept it a secret from me for so many years and angry with my birth parents for abandoning me."
"What did you do when you found out?"
"Well I started looking for my birth parents."
"Did you find them?"
"Well like I said before. I found my birth father a month before he died. I was too late for my mother though. She died when I was born. That's the reason I was adopted out. My father couldn't handle raising me on his own so he got rid of me."
"What about your adoptive parents?"
"I eventually forgave them. After my birth father died I figured it would be best to make up with them before it was too late. I didn't want to lose them too."
"So is that what you think I should do? Forgive PJ for abandoning me?"
"I'm sure he didn't 'abandon' you as such. He probably couldn't bare the pain of seeing you after losing your mother. And what I think doesn't matter. You have to do what you want to do not what somebody tells you to. If you're ready to forgive him the go ahead but don't do it because I told you to. You have to do it because you want to."
"And if I'm not ready to forgive him?"
"These things take time. I waited three months before I decided to forgive my father. I just regret not doing it earlier. If I didn't wait then I would have been able to get to know him better. But like I said it's your decision."
"The thing is I don't know if I'm ready or not. Part of me wants to forgive him and get to know him but then part of me is still really angry with him for keeping this from me for 18 years."
"I'm sure he's got a perfectly good reason for not telling you. My father was a drunk and he couldn't handle me when I was born so he gave me to a family who loved me like I was their son. I am thankful to him for that. He gave me the gift of a loving family and I'll always remember that."
"Ray and Peter did love me. I loved them so much too. But none of that matters anymore because both of them are gone. PJ is my father and he's the only relative I have left. I guess if I don't forgive him I'll have nowhere to go."
"You know you're always welcome here with me. And I'm sure Chris doesn't mind you staying either."
"Thanks. You don't know how much that means to know someone cares."
"Of course I care. I bet PJ cares too. Can you just imagine how he must be feeling at the moment? I know if I were in his situation I would be hurting so much. I lost my parents and that was bad enough. But to lose the woman I love and my child both. That would be devastating."
"I know it's just...I really want to forgive him but I cant. Not yet."
"I understand. But you do realize you have to talk to him sometime."
"I know." She responded with a yawn.
"I think that can wait though. You look like you could do with some sleep."
"I guess so. I haven't been sleeping well since I got out of hospital. I guess I just feel weird being by myself after three weeks of having someone come in and check on me every few hours."
"Well like I said you're welcome to stay here."
"Thanks." She yawned again.
"Come on we'd better get some sleep. You have an appointment tomorrow morning at the hospital and I have to work tomorrow afternoon."
"Yeah. I suppose."
"Come here." Evan laid himself down and Paige lowered herself slowly beside him.
He placed a protective arm around her and the two of them fell asleep together.
The next morning Chris had organised to bring Paige some breakfast in bed. She was surprised when she opened the door to Paige's room and saw that Paige was not in her bed. She carefully placed the tray of breakfast down on the cupboard beside the bed and made her way to the room next door.
"Evan." She called as she knocked on the door. "Are you awake?"
"Ugh." She heard a groan.
"Have you seen Paige this morning she wasn't in her bed?" She asked as she opened the door. "Oh." She smiled when she saw Paige and Evan curled up together on the double bed. "Never mind." She quietly backed out of the room and left the two of them to sleep in peace.
Evan heard the door clicking shut and he opened his eyes. He looked across the bed to see Paige sleeping soundly. He smiled and carefully climbed off the bed. He made his way to the bathroom leaving her to sleep as he readied himself for work.
Paige heard the water running as Evan fired up the shower. She yawned and stretched a little before sitting up in the bed. She looked around the room trying to register where she was. She placed a hand on her head and thought back to the previous night. She remembered telling Evan everything about her family and then the two of them falling asleep together.
She moved her legs to the side of the bed and pushed herself up. She yawned again and wiped the sleep out of her eyes. Then she looked at the alarm clock on the bedside table.
She had three hours until she had to be at the hospital for her appointment so she slowly made her way to her room to get dressed. When she opened the door she could smell freshly cooked bacon and eggs. She saw the tray sitting by her bed and decided to eat a little of it before getting dressed. Paige sat on the bed and looked at the tray.
She took a tiny piece of bacon from the plate. She placed it into her mouth and chewed slowly. She was still tired and wasn't that hungry so she placed the bacon back on the plate and picked up the glass of OJ. She sipped it slightly then placed that back on the tray too. Then she picked up the piece of toast.
She was about to take a bite when there was a knock at the door.
"It's open." She called. She smiled when she saw who it was. "Morning."
"Morning." Evan replied. "I got out of the shower and you were gone so I figured you came back in here." He sat next to her on the bed. "Is that bacon and eggs?" he asked when he noticed the tray.
"Yeah." Paige replied. "I can't eat them though. I'm not hungry."
"So what time is your appointment?" Evan asked slightly worried that she wasn't eating anything.
"10:00."
"Well I guess I should leave you to get dressed. I wouldn't want you to be late to the hospital. You may have to wait hours if that happens." He stood up.
"I've still got three hours left. Besides if you go who's going to eat my breakfast for me?"
"You should be eating your own breakfast." He told her.
"Yes Dad." She laughed and she picked up the fork and put a small amount of scrambled egg into her mouth.
"See isn't that nice?" Evan laughed.
"Not really. But then I've never been one for eggs. You'll probably like them though." She smiled and held the fork up to his mouth. He bent down and she placed it in his mouth.
"You're right I do like these eggs." He smiled. He knelt down in front of her and opened his mouth. "More." He cried.
"Ok." She fed him some more eggs.
"More." He laughed. "More."
"You can feed yourself." She laughed and handed him the fork.
"But I want you to feed me." He pouted.
"Come on. Show me what a big boy you can be and feed yourself." She said pretending to be his mother.
"But I want you to feed me Mummy?' He pouted again and Paige cracked up laughing.
"Are you laughing at me?" He crossed his arms acting as if he were angry with her.
"No of course not." She bit her lip to sustain herself from laughing.
"Nobody laughs at Evan Jones and gets away with it." He stood up and placed his hands on his hips. "Apologise or else." He smiled.
"Or else what?" she asked.
"Ore else..." He thought for a minute, "Or else I'll tickle you to death!" He laughed and grabbed her. He started tickling her and she rolled around screaming with laughter.
"Stop it!' She cried and she tried batting him away but it didn't work. He just kept on tickling. Her arms and legs were flying around wildly trying to stop him. "Stop please." She laughed.
"Why should I stop?"
"Because if you don't I'll...I'll never speak to you again." She said quickly.
"Hmmm. Sounds tempting." He smirked. "But I couldn't let that happen. I don't want to go through life without hearing the sound of your voice ever again." He smiled.
"Thanks." She smiled back. "Hey you'd better get out of here. I need to have a shower and get dressed before we head to the hospital."
"Awww do I have to?"
"Well you can wait for me if you really want to. But I'll be a while."
"That's ok. I'll just sit here and finish of this delicious breakfast." He picked up a piece of bacon and shoved it in his mouth.
"Righto." She shook her head and walked into the bathroom after grabbing some clothes.
He waited patiently on her bed eating her breakfast until she finally emerged ½ hour later dressed in a pair of black bootleg, hipster jeans and a pink Singlet top. She had her hair done up in a half ponytail and she was wearing the silver locket around her neck.
"Ready to go?' She asked.
"Yeah." He replied. "You look great."
"Thanks." She smiled at the compliment. "I see you've polished off my breakfast?"
"Sorry. I didn't think you were hungry."
"I'm not. Come on let's get out of here. The sooner I get to the hospital the sooner I can get out. I hate hospitals."
"You're not the only one." Jonesy told her and he stood up and walked to the door.
"At least you didn't have to spend almost a month in one."
"Yeah I suppose you have a point there."
"Of course I do." She pushed him out of the door, followed him out then locked it behind her.
They made their way down the stairs and were walking towards the front entrance when Chris called out to them.
"Hey Jonesy!' She called.
"Yeah Chris?" He turned around and walked over to her.
"You heading off now?"
"Yeah. Paige has an appointment at the hospital."
"Oh. Ah you got some mail." She held up some letters for him.
"I'll read them when we get back."
"Ok. Let me know what's going on with her will you?" Chris whispered. "I know she won't tell me for herself."
"Sure. See you when we get back."
He made his way back to Paige and the two of them headed out of the pub.
"So what's the verdict Doc?" Paige asked. She was sitting on the hospital bed playing with a stethoscope.
"Well I'm pleased to say that the results show no sign of major damage, however we did notice a lack of iron in your blood. Have you been eating properly?"
"I've been eating fine." Paige replied. "Why?"
"Well your blood pressure has risen quite a bit since you left. Have you been under any excess stress lately?"
"No. What's that got to do with anything anyway?"
"Well an increase in stress can cause your blood to pump faster and in turn your blood pressure rises."
"So?"
"So this can lead to severe heart damage and if you don't get it fixed soon then..."
"I'll be fine. Can I go now?"
"Of course."
"Come on Jonesy let's get out of here."
"If you don't mind I'd like for Constable Jones to stay for a little chat." Doc told her.
"Why should I mind?" Paige jumped off the bed. "I'll be waiting in the gift shop." She smiled at Jonesy and left the room.
"Is there something wrong Doc?"
"Well as I said before Paige's blood pressure has risen rapidly in the past week. I'm afraid she's not doing too well."
"She seems fine."
"She may seem fine but that's natural. Has she been acting off at all lately?"
"What do you mean off?"
"I mean has she been getting enough sleep, or eating enough because her health seems to show me otherwise. She seems really stressed."
"Well she did skip breakfast this morning. And she never seems to eat a lot at dinner. Plus she has been having nightmares as well."
"Ah. I see. Well if you don't mind I would like for you to keep an eye on her. Try and see what's bothering her so you can fix it."
"I can guess what's bothering her."
"What do you mean?"
"Well she's just found out she was adopted and she's been having a hard time trying to accept that."
"Ah. And this is causing her to stress out?"
"Well yeah. She has been a bit stressed. But I don't see how it could cause that much damage."
"Even so I would like you to look after her. Help her to calm down a little. Maybe take her away fro a bit?" Doc suggested. "Maybe taking her away from what's stressing her will calm her down a little. At least until she gets better."
"How am I supposed to do that? I've got work and..."
"I'm not suggesting you take her to the other side of the world. Maybe just get her out of town. Just for a weekend. That could help. Her."
"I'll see what I can do. Is that all?"
"Yes. Just...look after her."
"I will Doc." Jonesy replied and with that he left the room.
He walked into the gift shop to look for Paige. She saw him come in but he didn't see her so she took the opportunity to get him back for tickling her. She snuck up behind one of the shelves and waited until he was facing her before she jumped out at him.
"Boo." She smiled when she saw him jump.
"Gees Paige don't do that." He smiled.
"Ready to go?"
"Yeah." He replied.
"Great." She linked arms with him and they let the hospital.
"So I was thinking maybe we could go have lunch before we went back to the pub." Jonesy suggested.
"No thanks. I'm not hungry." Paige replied.
"You've got to eat something. I mean you didn't eat breakfast this morning and you ate hardly anything at dinner last night. Come to think of it you haven't been eating much at all lately." Jonesy looked at her.
"So?" She shrugged.
"So you could get really sick if you don't eat properly."
"I'm eating fine."
"No you're not." Jonesy pulled his arm away and looked at her. "Paige what is wrong? Ever since you left the hospital you've been acting really strange. You have been eating hardly anything, you've been waking up in the middle of the night after having nightmares and you've been acting really stressed."
"I have not."
"Paige I know how you feel at the moment but you have to sort things out with PJ soon. "If you don't you could get really sick. This not eating stuff is ridiculous."
"Since when do you have the right to tell me what I have to eat? You don't have any say over what I do. I thought you were my friend. Why have you turned against me all of a sudden?" She paused. "It's that doctor isn't it? He told you something and now you've turned against me."
"No Paige I haven't I just..."
"I thought you were my friend." Paige looked at him. Her eyes were red and her pupils were enlarged.
Jonesy was about to say something when Paige took off.
"Paige come back." He called and he started running after her. But she was too fast for him and before he knew it she was gone.
"Shit!' he cried and he ran back to his car.
Ok so I know this is a bad place to end it but I really needed to. I have so many other fics to work on so I needed to get this out of the way. I do have more but it needs more work. Hope you liked this part!
Jess