Gender Bender
By: Masako, PuRpLebLoSsOm,RoshiYoshi ?_'

Hahaha. One word, INCEST. This is your last chance to leave. Bye Bye dearie.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


"Are you SURE you want to do this, To-ya?" Yukito asked his very first and last lover, Kinomoto
Toya.

"I'm sure, Yuki." Toya ran a hand down Yukito's cheek.

"Okay then," Yuki's mouth opened, but nothing could come out.

"I'm sorry.." Kinomoto trailed off as Yuki left the cry room..

Two holy women at the back of the church sat in a pew, their hands folded on their lap. The two
looked very cross to many church goers, because apparently, all they did was sit in the back pew
together.

"Where in bloody hell is the minister? Wasn't this thing supposed to start an hour ago?" The green
eyed woman asked the long haired one.

"Shall I go to bloody hell and see, Sakura?"

BOUNCE! BOUNCE! BOUNCE! came Nakuru from the bathroom. There she was in her frilled pink
dress, bouncing around like nobody's buisness, carrying a pillow.

"Nakuru, would you be a little more subtle? Make sure you don't loose those rings, remember
you're supposed to be a good Ringbearer." came a voice from behind.

"THERE YOU ARE!" The green eyed one asked, furiously, pointing a finger.

The minister hastily grabbed the woman's hand and attempted to kiss it, but his lips barely touched
her skin. "There, Sakura-chan. That's the last time I'm kissing your hand, I'm getting really tired
of it."

"I didn't ask you to kiss me!!! Your lips didn't even TOUCH my hand, ERIOL!!"

"Well, Ok. So you don't throw a tantrum, why don't you two run along and get the two to be wed.
There's a football game in 45 minutes and if I finish this service fast enough, maybe I'll be able
to get some buffalo wings."

"You chauvinistic pig. Let's go Tomoyo." The two nuns got up and left.

"Dear lord.." Eriol pleaded, his right hand on his temples. "Help that woman make some sense of
hef life. She completely lost it after my cute little descendant & I ran away to Costa Rica."

(soon to be finished by purpleblossom, roshiyoshi, and myself) suggestions to: tainiponi@myst.net

(Purpleblossom's addition)

Suddenly, Eriol heard someone whimpering in a room. He turned around and headed to where the sound
coming from. He found himself in this room, where the statue of Mary stood.
Eriol heard the crying sound was getting louder and Eriol walked closer to the Virgin Mary. Eriol
felt his heart race as he began to get ideas to what the sound may be from. He kept his eyes on his
feet as he was closer to what the bared the crying sounds. He heared it cry in fear and looked up
at the Virgin's face.
" Oh, dear god." Eriol said in fear as his eyes widened. Then he realized and cried for joy.

" It is a sign. A sign of our dear lord above." Eriol said, a bit exaggerating.

Eriol knelt before the statue of Mother Mary and began to pray. " Oh, dear god. What does this mean,
what does this sign mean!" Eriol pleaded as the crying calmed down.

" Eriol, *sniff* what are you doing?" Fujitaka asked as he stepped up from behind the statue of Mary.

Eriol still had his hands clasped together, but looked up. " Oh, was that you crying? I thought, I
thought,...why were you crying?" Eriol said, trying to cover up the embarassing incident. ' Oh dear
god, I thought, that God was sending me a sign.' Eriol thought. Then he began to listen to Fujitaka's
story.

" Well, I was crying because I'm scared and I don't know what to do." Fujitaka said and sat on
the floor. He held his legs up to his chest and cuddled them.

" Why would you be scared you're only gonna get married. Of course, you getting married to your son
and not someone, well...better." Eriol said to him.

" What if we can't be a happy family? What if we can't have children? What if I'm not good enough
for him?" Fujitaka said and began to rock back on forth on the ground.

" Well, you will have a happy family. I doubt that YOU can be pregnant for 9 months. But you can always
adopt a kid, or a cheap way would be to steal one from the hospital." Eriol explained. " And, I think
that you are good enough for him, Yukito-san, might not think so, but I know Toya-san does." Eriol
continued.

Then, Eriol gave out a happy grin. " I remember the day he said ' I love my father, he's everything
a gay could ask for. And I'm going to marry him some day and maybe have more INCEST relatives.'" Eriol
said and laughed a little.

Then he looked at Fujitaka. " Tell me, why are you here?" Eriol asked.

Fujitaka opened his mouth, but Eriol answered for him.

" To marry, Toya, that's why. And why is that?" Eriol said.

Fujitaka opened his mouth again, but Eriol answered again.

" Because you knew you were ready. And what is going to happen now?" Eriol said.

Fujitaka thought he'd have the chance to answer this, but once again Eriol
did the answering.

" You're going to marry Toya-san, and have a excentric, happy life! Then you'll conquer the
world!" Eriol said, enthusiatically.

Fujitaka just stared the delirious minster.

" Now, get out there and marry your son!" Eriol encouraged, and gave Fujitaka a slap at
the ass.

Fujitaka moved slightly and jumped from the impact of the slap. He walked to the hall, the place before
the aisle to the altar.

" Who's the wise minister?" Eriol asked himself.

" You are, Eriol." Eriol answered himself in a girly
tone.

" That's right, and who's the sexy minister?" Eriol asked himself, waiting for the right answer.

" That's you, Eriol, the HOT priest!" Eriol answered again in a girly voice. Then he walks off, casually to
the hall. ' You are good. And you walkin' SEXY!' Eriol praised himself. He kept walking and then tripped over
a book.

" Wha!" Eriol screamed as he fell to the ground. Then he got up slowly and held the book in his hand. " Now,
who's damn book is this?" Eriol said as he looked inside the book for a name. Eriol read the owner's name.
" Ah, Minister ERIOL HIIRAGIZAWA!" Eriol, suddenly noticed that it was the book used for marriages. He looked
around and slip the book into his shirt.

~Later, Like 30 seconds, the beginning of the wedding~

Tomoyo sat at the organ next to the altar, getting ready to play the opening song. Eriol was standing in front
of the altar making passes at Tomoyo. Tomoyo saw him and gave him the finger. Then she turned to the piano.

" I'm here only to play the music, and to support Fujitaka and Toya-san. Just tell me when to play and nothing
else." Tomoyo said to him.

" Okay." Eriol said and looked at Fujitaka being escorted by Sakura. " Okay, now." Eriol told Tomoyo as he saw
that the others were ready.

Tomoyo started to play. She was playing the 'funeral song.' Syaoran started snickering, followed by the
people sitting on the pews. Tomoyo smiled sheepishly and flipped the pages of her song book to the right notes.
She heaved out a sigh and began to play the 'wedding march.'

Yuki started walking down the aisle with his basket full of peach blossom petals and started tossing them to the
people in the pews.

A little boy was determined to catch a petal. Yuki threw petals in his direction and the little held his hands
up and high. He smiled as a petal came floating down to him. Suddenly, so was a rock, and the rock came flying
first and the little boy's eyes widened.

POOK!

The little boy was knocked out cold.

(RoshiYoshi's Addition ?_')

"Damn, how'd that get in there?!" Yukito walked over to the boy and grabbed the rock. "I'm truly sorry! Here's the petal you wanted." Yukito gave the pancaked-like boy a beautiful peach blossom petal and continued his walk to the seat he was assigned to sit. And then came the ring-bearer, bouncing liked it's her first time bouncing , all the way to the altar. And then she sat down next to Yukito. "Nakuru, where's the rings?" Yukito said grabbing the pink pillow from her. "Oops, i guess it flew away." Nakuru said all happy. "AAArrg, they will have to use the fake ones that i took from the cereal box!" Yukito said disgusted by Nakuru.

Fujitaka and Sakura walked down the aisle to the altar and Fujitaka kissed Sakura and she walked away to sit down. "I thought you were wearing the tux?!" Eriol said curiously. "No, I made Toya wear it! Don't I look so damn fine!?" Fujitaka said. "No." Eriol said flatly. "Why?!" Fujitaka said fiercely. "Because your flat-chested." Eriol said giggled. "Ohhh, I'll slap you silly someday!?" Fujitaka said. "W-w-what's that suppose to mean!?" Eriol backed away from Fujitaka.

Tomoyo played louder as Toya and Li walked down and as they arrived at the altar. Toya tried to kiss Li but Li backed away. "One touch of those lips on my cheek i'm coming back to haunt you!" Li warned him as he walked away to sit down. "WHY ARE YOU WEARING THE DRESS!" Toya yelled at his father. "I TOLD YOU TO WEAR THE TUX!" Fujitaka yelled back. "NO NO NO! I SAID I WAS GOING TOOOOOO!!!" Toya sat down and started to cry. "Your-your crying." Fujitaka knelt down and wiped away the tears from Toya's face. Everyone started crying. "LATE REACTION!" Eriol yelled. Everybody started cheering and the husband and husband stood up and the ceremony started.

"Anybody who think these two should not be wed, speak now or forever hold your peace?"' Eriol said. Yukito raised his hand but Sakura kept pushing it down and they started to have a dramatic fight until they heard a big boom! Everyone looked at each other. "SOMEONE HAS SPOKEN!" Eriol said blushing. Everyone yelled, "WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?" Eriol turned very red. "EWWWW!!! THE MINISTER HAS SPOKEN!" Everyone said disgusted.

Eriol said confessing,"Dear Lord, i confess that something went up my ass and died. Please forgive me, for doing that and for saying the very bad word "ass"!" After a few silent moments, the ceremony continued.