Title: Crumpled Notes 2: Lily's Discovery
Summary: Lily read the Philosopher's Stone during the her first few weeks as a Seventh Year, a time when she doubts her feelings for a certain Potter. But what if she reads another note from the future, a note written for and about her son…by Ginny Weasley. H/G and L/J
Genre: Romance/General
Fiction Rated: K+
Language: English
Type: one-shot
Disclaimer: I do no own any of the characters, places or anything else the genius JK Rowling made.
(PLEASE READ this) Author's Notes: Originally, I didn't plan to paste this here, I just had nothing to do and while re-reading some of my stories this popped into my head so I jolt it down. I know you may think it's just a waste of creativity but it turned out quite well, so I liked it and decided to paste it. I titled it after the story that inspired it, which I also made, named Crumpled Notes. So now, it's Crumpled Notes 2. For those who read Crumpled Notes, you would find that I slightly modified the grammar of Ginny's letter. For those who didn't, don't worry because you don't really have to read that to understand this. But if you do wanna know what Crumpled Notes 1 is about, it was when Ron found this letter written by Ginny after Harry disappeared for two weeks fighting Voldemort. I put in the exact same letter except with the grammatical modification. Enjoy reading…
Story:
Crumpled Notes 2: Lily's Discovery
Lily grumbled and flopped down on the couch in annoyance. Nothing could make her day worse than having to face the most irritating creature on the face of the planet, which was, of course, non other than James 'Bighead' Potter.
She put her head in her hands and screamed in frustration. It wasn't enough so she punched the armrests with both her hands and stamped her feet in an alternating manner on the stone cold floor. A small group of first years by the fire looked at her in surprise and stood up to leave. It's not everyday you see your Head Girl acting like she had either been cursed or possessed by some sort of insane demon.
But Lily was not usually like this. Even when she gets annoyed with Potter, she was not as aggravated.
It was all because of the book. That book
She sighed and closed her eyes, trying to rid her mind of him and the bloody book.
She didn't know where it came from or how did it get to her. She didn't even know if what it contains was true. But even if she kept saying to herself that it was just someone's good idea of a joke, in her heart there was a nagging feeling telling her that it was the truth.
The book told a story about an eleven-year-old boy by the name of Harry Potter. When she saw it, she was about to throw it into the fire, because it had the word "Potter" on it. Yet for some reason, something about it captivated her to read it.
With every word she read, the more she felt the mixture of feelings rose up in her. If the book was indeed true (which she deeply felt was), then she married James Potter and had a son who inherited his looks and her green eyes. Not only that, the evil wizard, Voldemort, murdered them and Harry was left to be raised by her deranged sister, Petunia soon-to-be Dursley.
It made her angry that Petunia dared mistreat her only son. It made her proud that Harry helped Hogwarts and defeated the Dark Lord twice already in his young life. It made her happy that he had gotten her beautiful eyes. It made her worry that Voldemort tried to kill him for some unknown reason and he was famous for it. It made her annoyed that he took after his father in his slight arrogance, knack for trouble and rule breaking. It made her had so many feelings that she couldn't think of it all. But the one the really bothered her was this: It made her confused on what she really thought of James Potter.
Finally, after many talks with her own conscience, she accepted that she did marry him and for that to happen, she had to love him. Love him?! LOVE?!?!
Before she had the book, she thought she hated him but there were sometimes (during those last few weeks during 6th Year) doubts on this. After the book, the doubts increased. Now, thanks to her 'helpful' friends, she somehow realized she was in denial about her real feelings for him and now that she got to know him well (she was Head Girl, he was Head Boy, you get the picture), she was beginning to appreciate him more.
The problem was: she didn't want to like James Potter. She had sworn to herself that this was never going to happen. She loathed him and that was the end of that.
Lily let her hands and head hang between her knees, causing her lush red hair to fall around her legs. From the corner of her eyes, she saw a crumpled piece of paper right next to the grate. There was something strange about it. Lily sat up and slowly reached for the paper, which she noticed had a tiny burnt mark on its edge, as if someone threw it failingly into the fire.
She looked around the common room and saw no one. Slowly, she opened the piece of paper.
With curious eyes, Lily started reading its contents:
I don't know why I wrote this. I don't know what made me do it. But I couldn't lie to myself anymore. I can't deny my feelings, not another time again. I can't ignore my friends any longer. Yet I can't help it. I know I shouldn't miss him. Actually, I shouldn't even be thinking about him at all. Yes, that was my stubborn brain speaking. You could try anything, even 'obliviate' (sp?) yourself, but you couldn't completely erase the thoughts of the one you love from your heart. I tried it many times to forget him, even before he left us. I dated many lads, trying to forget him…trying to stop loving him. I couldn't. That's what breaks my heart the most. I thought he would never love me back. Hermione was always there for me. She told me to move on and be myself. I managed to be myself more, but I couldn't move on. Even after Michael and Dean. I didn't know why then...that is until last year when his lips touched mine for the first time. Last year he did something I could just dream of when I was in my first few years in Hogwarts: He liked me more than a friend; maybe even love me. He saw me much more than just his best friend's sister. I found happiness unlike anything I've felt before when I was still just his friend. His smiles, his arms around me, made me feel safe and lucky. He was where my world revolved around, even if just for a while. His green eyes were like a wide window. I could see into his soul. I may not feel his internal battle nor could I help him, but I know and I understand. His words were not only my comfort, but they were also what kept me moving. Finally, the jigsaw puzzle of my life was completed. I realized…he was the missing piece. But just as I expected, it didn't last. Not all good things last. I know that now.
A terrible disaster that affected the whole wizarding world caused him to make a decision only he could make. He didn't want me to get hurt he said. I understood his intentions, but I loved him as well. He didn't want any more of the people he loved to be hurt. I admired him for what he must do. I admired him for what he wanted, but I couldn't care less.
Why couldn't you understand Harry? Why? If Ron and Hermione would do anything for you, why couldn't you see what I would do? But you wanted me to live, right? You didn't think you idiot. If you disappear from my life, do you think I would still live? Why couldn't you understand, Potter?!
But I agreed with him anyway. I did what he wanted, even if it killed me inside more than anything.
He said he didn't want the Dark Lord to use me again. He didn't want what happened to me before to happen again. I did what he told me. I did it knowing that at least I could still see him. I agreed knowing that he would still be safe here in the school in my sight. But he left me…literally.
He's not in Hogwarts anymore. I don't know where he is, and it's tearing me apart. I never knew what he really meant to me until he disappeared from my life. I don't know if he's still alive. More than a week has passed, and he didn't come back. He didn't even write to me. I'm dying inside not knowing where he is.
Please come back, Harry. I need you. What will happen to us? No one knows what I'm suffering right now. You told me you'd never forget me. You told me you'd always take care of me. But are you here now? You lied to me, Potter. Now I wished I just saw you as my big brother's best friend and nothing else. Oh, but no. You have to come into my life. You have to save me, and show me that you could love me back. Now I couldn't turn back. I couldn't live without you, and I want you to know that. I want to hate you, but I can't…I could never. I've been keeping these thoughts for 2 weeks Harry. But I couldn't send this to you. I don't know where you are, or if you're alive. I don't want to know, I don't want to get hurt again Harry. Please come back.
Ginny Weasley
Lily slowly folded back the crumpled note, taking care not to do any more damage to it. Ginny Weasley.
Why was it that for some reason she could relate to this girl?
Ginny had been mentioned many times in the book, but she never knew that one day that she would be the one who would learn to love her son. And according to the letter, Harry loved her too.
A tear slowly rolled down Lily's cheek. Just like the book, she wasn't sure if the letter was from the future or not. But she couldn't help it. One day her son would leave those he loved to fight the destiny he had been entrusted with since the moment of his birth. A destiny that caused him to abandon and be abandoned by his love ones. Lily looked at the letter again. Even if she didn't know her, her heart fell out to Ginny. She knew that it would really kill someone to know that the special someone in one's life is out there in the battlefield, crossing his path with death while she stays there crying and dying inside. She may not know what it feels to suffer what Ginny had, but somehow she could feel the pain of keeping your feelings to yourself, knowing that death will soon engulfed the people your love and you didn't even had the chance to tell them.
No wonder she could relate to her.
Like Ginny, she wished that Harry would return safe and be able to be with her once again.
Just as she wiped the tears off her face, the portrait wall opened. In came James. Amazing timing. Bouncing on the balls of his feet while walking, he grinned and sat right in front of Lily.
"Ah, Evans, I see I'm fortunate enough to see you again," he said cheerfully. Lily looked him in the eye, the wheels on her head turning.
James' grin disappeared when he saw her face, "What? I didn't do anything yet. Are you alright?"
She sat up and smiled, "Of course. Oh yeah, here." She handed him the letter.
James looked at in confusion. "What's this?"
Lily shrugged, "You may find it interesting. I've found it in the grate."
Then she stood up and left James' pondering what just happened. She suddenly stopped on her tracks.
And turned.
"Oh, James."
He looked up, not sure if he was astonished that she called him James or that she just handed him a crumpled piece of parchment without any reasonable explanation.
"Yes?"
"I'm sorry."
Another surprise. "For what?"
Lily shrugged, "Seriously? I don't know."
James just sat there, not really comprehending anything that happened. So, he did what any person on his situation would do: he opened the crumpled note.
THE END
NOTE: That's it for now. Please review and tell me how it is. I think I made some parts sound funny despite the fact that the letter is dramatic. Please review!!:)
