"Charley, you and I can't be together anymore." My mouth hung open as the words flew from Amy's mouth. Amy… I'd fought to save her from a vampire who had lived next door to me and tried to kill our entire neighborhood. Finally, after waiting so long, I had surrendered to her charms in the penthouse while my new roommate, magician Peter Vincent, was doing his show. How the hell could she suddenly decide to break up with me? I desperately wanted to say all this to her, but all I could manage was a confused "Why?" She sighed. "You're in love with someone else." What? "You don't realize it yet, but you're in love with someone else. I can't possibly date you knowing that you'd be happier with them, but I'm always here as a friend." I racked my brain, trying to figure out who I could possibly be in love with. "OK, it's not any of your friends. It's not Regina, Peter's new PA. It's definitely not Jerry, 'cause he tried to kill us and we killed him. I'm drawing a blank, Amy. Please help me figure it out!" Amy covered my hand with one of hers. "Look, who do you always talk to when things go wrong? Who do you coach through all their problems? Whose face do you see guiding you through when you're in trouble? Whose cell phone calls do you always answer first? Who do you hang out with whenever you don't have plans with me, your other friends, or your mom? Hell, who was your last wet dream about?" As Amy fired the questions at me, I answered them all in my head. The answers were all the same, and… fuck. Fuck. How do I, a heretofore straight young man, tell my much older, famous, issue-laden, also heretofore straight roommate I love him? Am I bi or is it just this particular man? Do I even need to rush into categorizing myself? What's Mom going to think? As if she heard my last mental question, Amy smiled and said, "Don't worry, I already told your mom. She thinks Peter feels the same way for you, and she wants you two to be happy." I'm free to pursue him? I'm free to pursue him? This was just too much, and I said the only other word my overloaded mind could form: "Shit."