AN: I don't own Naruto.
All Tobi ever wanted from him was acceptance. He would try so hard to get Deidara to notice him- praise him for doing something worth while, but he would always just end up screwing it up in the end.
What Tobi didn't know, was that the only reason Deidara was so cold to him, was because he was replacing Sasori.
What Deidara didn't know, was that he was tearing Tobi's heart out, piece by piece. The boy yearned to be close to the blonde, he wanted it more than anything else in the whole world- even more than when he wanted to join the Akatsuki.
But Deidara just kept pushing him away, and it hurt. But there was no way he'd ever let that show, he only masked it behind fake happiness, bouncing around the layer obnoxiously every day.
But that day would end, and he would walk into the room he shared with the blonde, pulling off his orange mask, revealing what was really under it.
Hurt, need, want…
It was a face he only allowed Deidara to see. Sometimes he even wondered why he bothered, though. Because Deidara would never even acknowledge him. They would simply only say goodnight to each other, before the lights shut off, and silence washed over the room.
Deidara would never let him in on his life, hell, he wondered if he even had emotion, other than anger.
But as he lay awake, staring up at the dark ceiling, he heard a faint noise- almost what sounded like a small whimper, and he looked over at the other bed that held the blonde. He was trembling under his sheets, and by the looks- and sound of it, his breath was a bit uneven, hitching slightly.
Was he asleep? He quietly crawled out of his own bed, kneeling down on Deidara's, "Senpai..?" He asked softly, even though he knew he was going to get lectured for it later- if not now.
The blonde froze, silent tears streaming down his face, "What do you want, Tobi, un." He said, trying to keep his voice strong, thanking god that it was dark.
"…Are you okay…?" He asked quietly.
"I'm fine, un." He replied sharply- his voice cracking. "Just go to sleep."
Senpai….Just let me in…
"….No you're not…" He said, prying further.
Just let me in…Please….
"I said I'm fine, Tobi un!" He shouted, sitting upright, his jaw clenched tightly, tears streaming down his face. There was no use in hiding them, he knew Tobi could see through him, he always did.
Just this once…
"Senpai..." He said quietly, wiping away his tears with one hand, "You're crying…" He finished quietly, almost worried.
"No shit, un." He growled, curling his knees up to his chest. "Just go back to bed, un. This is none of your concern..." The blonde hissed half heartedly, feeling humiliated crying in front of Tobi like this. Dammit, why did Sasori have to die? Why did he have to leave him like he did? It just wasn't fair.
If you won't be there for me…
"Senpai…" He said quietly, pulling his arms around him, allowing the blondes head to rest against his chest, smiling when he didn't pull away. For once in his life, he felt Deidara's arms clutch tightly to the back of his nightshirt, trembling. He ran his hands through his hair, not questioning anything, not saying a word as his whimpers eventually faded as his tears finally dried up, leaving him in a calm sleep for the rest of the night.
At least let me be there for you…
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