Author's Note and Disclaimer:
This story is dedicated to my friends and family, and to the brilliant David Tennant, who played the role of the 10th Doctor and the Metacrisis Doctor on Doctor Who. I also would like to give special thanks to my Beta reader for this story, Hay Bails, who gave me help and tips on how I could improve this story. I couldn't have done it without you!
On one final note, I would like to take the time to state the obvious and say that I do not own Doctor Who or any of its characters, logos, etc; however, I do own the cover image for this story, as I painted it myself in the Colors! 3d application for the Nintendo 3DS, and added words through the Comic Workshop application that was on the same gaming system. I also do not own the song, I Don't Wanna Miss a Thing, that is mentioned in this story - that belongs to its respective writers, composers, and/or the band, Aerosmith.
I Don't Want to Miss a Thing: A Metacrisis Doctor x Rose Oneshot
A small boy stood in a field - an empty, barren field with muddy ground. It was a misty day, from what the Metacrisis Doctor could tell - either that, or a very dusty one, as what could either be mist or billows of sand prevented him from getting a clear view of the area, and sometimes even blocked the view of the boy that was standing just a few feet away. The Metacrisis Doctor could hear echoing of voices all around him - the echoing of a conversation between a man and a young boy, but when he looked at the child in the field, he could see that the boy's lips were not moving.
"Tell me the name of the boy who isn't going to die today." the man said.
"Davros. My name is Davros." the boy replied.
Then the sound of the TARDIS dematerialising could be heard, followed by complete silence. It was only then that the Metacrisis Doctor realized that the man's voice that he had heard was the voice of the 12th Doctor.
The Metacrisis Doctor turned his attention back to the boy standing in the field, who was now crying out for help in the same child's voice that he heard only moments before, pleading to an as-of-yet unknown third party. "You said you'd help me. You said I would survive." Were among a few of the words that the Metacrisis Doctor could make the boy out to be saying. Moments later, he saw the 12th Doctor come up behind the boy, holding a Dalek's laser gun in his hands, pointing it in the direction of the child. The boy asked him a question regarding whether or not he was going to save him, to which the Doctor's only reply was, "I'm going to save my friends, the only way I can."
Visions quickly flashed in the Metacrisis Doctor's head - visions of Clara and Missy, whom everyone thought was dead, being killed by the Daleks, then the TARDIS seemingly being destroyed - lingering there for only a moment before ending, returning his thoughts to the 12th Doctor, with a better understanding of what he seemed to be planning to do, and why he was going to do it. All around the Metacrisis Doctor, a disembodied voice echoed troubling words that sent a chill down his spine. He didn't need to see the person speaking to know who it was, for he recognized the voice in an instant; it was the voice of his archenemy, the creator of the Daleks, the greatest enemy to the Time Lords - Davros. Not the Davros who stood before him today as a child, but the adult Davros that he knew, feared and despised.
"You hold in your hands the heartbeat of every Dalek." the voice spoke, seemingly directed at the 12th Doctor, "Genocide in a moment."
The Metacrisis Doctor's eyes widened in fear as the voice posed its final question, a question that he both hated and feared.
"Are you ready to be a god?"
As if in answer to this question, the 12th Doctor raised and steadied the weapon, ready to fire.
"NO!" the Metacrisis Doctor cried, but his cries seemed to go unnoticed by the 12th Doctor. He cried out again and again, beginning to feel tears rolling down his cheeks.
"NO! Stop, please!" the Metacrisis Doctor was still crying out these words when he awoke to find himself in his bedroom, tears still falling from his eyes. He tried to slow his breathing by calming himself as he let out a heavy sigh, though not necessarily a relieved one. It had happened again; every night for the past week, he had been plagued with the same nightmare. It was as if the dream had been warning him of things to come; in fact, he was sure of it. Sighing, he turned over onto his left side, looking at his beautiful wife who lay on the bed beside him, asleep; thankfully, his screams didn't seem to have woken her up. Eight years ago, he had married her - Rose Marion Tyler, the love of his life - on Christmas Eve, and their life had been, overall, a wonderful, beautiful dream ever since then. Of course, like any marriage, they had the occasional fight, but unlike most other marriages, they always seemed to resolve themselves, usually within a day at the very most. No matter what the fight was over, no matter how big the argument, they always found that their love for each other was bigger, and stronger, than any of it. Whatever challenges came their way in life, they always overcame them - even that one particular issue involving Jackie. He sighed, recalling the events as they came back to him.
Their first few months of marriage had been perfect - it was just Rose and the Doctor, spending time together however they wanted it. He'd taken a job at Torchwood, while Rose stayed at home and helped her Mum around her house. But after a year of marriage, things changed. Jackie had begun to question Rose about why she wasn't pregnant yet. Were they trying to prevent it from happening? Rose had assured her otherwise, saying that there had been plenty of opportunities for it to happen, but it just hadn't yet. She told her mother that she and her husband weren't in any rush, that they could wait until it was ready to happen on its own; however, Jackie strongly disagreed with this point of view. "Well, you need to try harder!" was Jackie's irrational response, "When you get back home, you tell that bloke you call a husband that you want to try again tonight, and you're going to keep trying, every day, until it happens." Although Rose tried to argue the point at first, her mother had made sure to remind her, with the obvious intent of creating guilt, that she "wasn't getting any younger", and that she was entitled to at least one grandchild. Not wanting to disappoint her Mum, she of course agreed, and together she and her husband had tried their very best. As months went on, this had taken its toll on the hardworking Doctor, and he began to become more and more unwell and exhausted. What's more, Rose found that she still wasn't pregnant, and this began to worry everyone; that's when she and her husband decided to consult a doctor - a real one - on the matter.
A few tests were run by the physicians, and soon after, the couple discovered the truth behind their troubles - the Metacrisis Doctor was infertile. The cause of this? Being half-human and half-Time Lord was actually the very thing that made it impossible for him to have any children. Whether common knowledge or not, it is a fact that hybrid creatures are often unable to reproduce, and the same was true of this hybridized incarnation of the Time Lord. To be very honest, neither Rose nor the Doctor cared that much, as they knew and believed that all that they needed was each other, but how Jackie took to this issue was another matter entirely. Rose had tried her best to explain to her mum that she and her husband were happy together as they were; in fact, they had decided that they didn't really want children, after all. Rose explained that all she and the Doctor really wanted was each other, but Jackie wasn't happy with that. Rose often found herself getting into a heated battle with her own mother whenever Jackie tried to suggest to Rose that she leave him and find herself a real husband. Eventually, the stress it was putting on the couple was just too much for them, and they decided it was best to leave.
"The whole reason I was so supportive of the marriage was because I thought you two would be starting a family!" she had told her daughter that final day while Rose was talking with her in her kitchen, and Rose knew that she had meant it - she had never really liked the Doctor all that much to begin with, since he had, after all, spirited her only daughter - who, at the time, was only 19 years of age - away in the TARDIS in March of 2005. Naturally, the news about the Doctor's inability to have children did nothing to help that situation.
"Mum, we've been over this; it doesn't matter to me! The Doctor is all the family I need. I love him, and he loves me! Nothing else matters." Rose explained.
"Don't be stupid, Rose; of course it matters! This bloke can't even manage to give you a child; how great of a man can he possibly be?! He's already failed his number one duty as your husband!" Jackie retorted.
"His 'number one duty' as my husband is not to give me a child - his duty is to love me and make me happy, and he's doing that just fine!" Rose shouted; she couldn't believe the way her mother was acting.
"You could find someone better who could do that just as well as he can, and get you pregnant!" Jackie replied.
"Oh, always about that, isn't it? He is all I've ever wanted, Mum - not a baby, just him, just the kind, wonderful, amazing man that I fell in love with; everything else comes second to me." Rose told her frustratedly, "But you don't really care how I feel, do you? It's all about you, the fact that you want grandchildren." She paused for a moment, just staring at Jackie, who was apparently at a loss for words.
"You know, I felt bad for you at first, Mum; I really did." Rose added after a moment, "So did Doctor! Before we knew what was wrong, he and I tried our very best to make it happen - not because we really wanted a baby, but because we wanted to make you happy. You may not think so, but my husband really does care about you; he thought that maybe, just maybe, if he gave you a grandchild, that would make you happy, and he could finally gain your approval. You have no idea how hard he tried to please you; I'd watch him when he got up in the morning, still exhausted, and get dressed to go to work. He'd come home every everning from work, and I could tell by the look in his eyes that all he really wanted to do was rest; he was wearing himself out." Rose was in tears now, her voice beginning to sound somewhat uneven, as she looked at her mum with a look of disbelief in her eyes.
"He did everything he possibly could to gain your approval and make you happy, and all you do is treat him like rubbish! Do you really think he doesn't feel bad enough without you constantly insulting him, trying to remind how much of a failure he is because of something that isn't even his fault?! Why can't you just be happy with the family you already have? You've got Dad, and me, and little Tony, and yes, even the Doctor, too, though I know you'll never accept that. Isn't that enough?" she continued, cutting Jackie off when she tried to speak, "No, you know what? It doesn't matter anymore. I'm through - I'm through having the same conversations and the same fights over and over, and never getting anywhere. You're never going to accept him as my husband; it doesn't matter to you how happy we are together. We're leaving." And with that, she walked out.
At first, the couple weren't sure how they would leave, or where they would go, but then they remembered something - the piece of TARDIS coral that the original Doctor had given them when the Metacrisis Doctor and Rose returned to their universe. Under Donna's advice, they had carefully cared for the tiny future TARDIS, and within just the few short years that they had been married, it had become a fully working space/time machine. Deciding that this was their only chance at finding happiness again, they had chosen to use it as their new home and travel away from their troubles, returning to Rose's universe of origin, where they ran into the Doctor again. At first, the Metacrisis Doctor had greatly disliked the idea, fearing that Rose might choose the original Doctor over him now that she had him back again, knowing that he was only a copy and feeling that he could never compare to the real thing for her. However, Rose had soon assured him that this wasn't the case, telling him that, although he was still the same person deep down inside and she would always care for him, the original Doctor was no longer visibly the man she had fallen in love with - neither in appearance, nor attitude. The man she had fallen in love with was the man that her husband was now, in every way, and she would never leave him for anything or anyone. Even though he still loved her and wanted to be with her, the original Doctor had accepted that he could never have her back again, having given up that right when he left her on Bad Wolf Bay with Metacrisis. He held no contempt for his clone, even if he was a bit jealous of him, because he knew that this was the only way that he and Rose could truly be happy together; taking pity on Metacrisis' unfairly shortened lifespan, he even found a way to use the Chameleon Arch to turn both Rose and the Metacrisis Doctor into proper Time Lords, which they were both very thankful for. They continued to meet up with him after that, helping him when he was in danger many times.
The Doctor and Rose in the TARDIS, just as it should be. The Metacrisis Doctor recalled the original Doctor's words to them when he had given them the piece of TARDIS coral that day on the beach, a small smile on his face as he thought of how happy he and Rose were living in their very own TARDIS again, and how well Rose had adjusted to life as a Time Lord.
He sighed sadly as his thoughts returned to the present, remembering the troubles they were faced with. This isn't fair, he thought as he looked at his wife, We made it through all of this, and for what? To have it all taken away from us again? Why is it that this always happens? Is it too much for me to ask just to have her in my life - just for her to have me in her life? It was almost too much for him to bear - the thought of him losing her, the thought of her losing him. He would sacrifice anything of his own if it meant them staying together, but he knew that there was nothing that he could do, nothing he could give, to change things.
He knew that the original Doctor had left once again to go on a mission, and he suspected that he was in trouble, knowing that at this very moment, he could be making a decision that could destroy everything the couple had worked so hard to achieve. He could understand the reason why 12 might be tempted to do such a thing as preventing the creation of the Daleks - it seemed to be the only way that he could save Missy, Clara, and the TARDIS - but surely he knew what that would cost them? Without the Daleks, the Time War would never have happened. Would he have even met Rose and saved her life? Would they have travelled together? Without the Daleks, Rose would never have felt the need to absorb and control the TARDIS' energy in order to save the 9th Doctor, thus, he never would have had to absorb that energy in order to save her, and as a result, would never regenerate into the 10th Doctor. More importantly, the Metacrisis Doctor would never have been born. The couple's entire marriage would never have happened. He also knew that they would not be the only ones effected if the Daleks never existed; this was something that encompassed the lives of nearly everyone in the universe. Many people who died would live, but at the same time, some people who lived would die.
"I love you, Rose," he whispered, moving closer to her and gently running a hand over her long golden hair, a sad smile on his face. He could never tell her what might happen to them; he couldn't bear to ruin what could be their last days together by weighing her down with worry. He considered just going back to sleep, but he knew he wouldn't be able to. How could he bear to sleep through what could be their final moments together? If this was the end for them, if they were going to lose everything they had, he was going to make the most of every last moment they had together.
Hoping to distract himself from their troubles somehow, he reached back and turned on the radio that was on the nightstand by his side of the bed; perhaps some music would distract him. He wrapped his arms around his wife, listening as I Don't Wanna Miss a Thing by Aerosmith began to play for them. He couldn't help finding it rather fitting to the situation, each line beautifully describing his thoughts at the moment about Rose. He closed his eyes, listening to every word and feeling as though, at that moment, the song had been written for no one but them.
I could stay awake just to hear you breathing
Watch you smile while you are sleeping
While you're far away and dreaming
I could spend my life in this sweet surrender
I could stay lost in this moment forever
Well, every moment spent with you is a moment I treasure
Never before had these words sounded more beautiful to him, nor had they ever sounded more true; Rose was the most important thing to him in his life, and he loved everything about her. Just hearing her breathing brought him comfort, and seeing her smile always made his hearts soar. Times like this, he found that just being there beside her was the greatest thing in the world, just being able to see and hear her there, knowing that she was okay, and that she was happy.
I don't wanna close my eyes
I don't wanna fall asleep
'Cause I'd miss you, baby
And I don't wanna miss a thing
'Cause even when I dream of you
The sweetest dream would never do
I'd still miss you, baby
And I don't wanna miss a thing
It was true; he didn't ever want to fall asleep, he was afraid of missing out on a single moment. Even dreaming of Rose could never be the same as actually being there beside her. He'd miss too much if he ever closed his eyes for even a moment.
Lying close to you, feeling your heart(s) beating
And I'm wondering what you're dreaming
Wondering if it's me you're seeing
Then I kiss your eyes and thank God we're together
And I just wanna stay with you in this moment forever, forever and ever
He held her close like there was no tomorrow, never wanting to let go. He wondered if her dreams were of him, because he knew that she was always in his heart and mind. The truth was that, although he had never been much of a religious man before, since he had met Rose, they had encountered many things, and some that he just couldn't explain scientifically, such as the Devil that he had encountered on an impossible planet, said to have been sealed away before time itself, which possessed a few of his fellow explorers. But when he was finally reunited with Rose in his Metacrisis form, when he was allowed to go with her and marry her, that was when he began to believe the most in blessings and a higher power. Every day they were together was a miracle to him, and he hoped and prayed that it would never have to end.
I don't wanna close my eyes
I don't wanna fall asleep
'Cause I'd miss you, baby
And I don't wanna miss a thing
'Cause even when I dream of you
The sweetest dream would never do
I'd still miss you, baby
And I don't wanna miss a thing
He kissed her on the cheek as the song continued its second verse, contemplating the words and wishing Rose could hear it and know that this was how he felt about her, even though she was asleep.
I don't wanna miss one smile
I don't wanna miss one kiss
Well, I just wanna stay with you
Right here with you, just like this
I just wanna hold you close
Feel your heart(s) so close to mine
And just stay here in this moment
For all the rest of time...
Her every smile, her every kiss - it all meant the world to him. He spent every moment loving her and embracing her like it was their last moments together, knowing that it could very well be. He reveled in these moments, knowing she was his and he was hers, knowing that they belonged to each other, and that they were now together, listening to a song that reminded him just how special that was. He didn't know what the future held for them, or if they even had a future ahead, but he knew that no matter how long they had, he would spend every last moment beside her. And if they did make it out of this, if the 12th Doctor found another way to save his lost friends, the Metacrisis Doctor vowed that he would never again take a single moment for granted.
Once the song had finished playing, he sighed, looking at his wife lovingly but sorrowfully. Please, Doctor, he thought, please do the right thing.