1943

'We have a new patient on the ward today Sister Evangelina, arrived late last night. Shelagh Mannion, 18, broke her leg and has a laceration to the head. If you could change her dressings please. We only had time for a rudimentary job.' Sister Evangelina looked at her new colleague. She'd been withdrawn from the front line after three years due to worries of poor fragile women being witness to too much gore and strife and the obvious connection with her bursting appendix. Quite frankly the nun found it ridiculous yet here she was in a small London hospital treating silly girls and boys getting into scrapes and, all too often, men who had barely made it back to Blighty themselves.

'Of course.' She strode over to the cubicle and puled the curtains back to find a young blonde woman sat flicking through a tatty paperback book. 'Miss Mannion?'

'Greetings Sister.' The girl beamed up at her. 'Sorry about this I know you must have your hands full with soldiers and all.'

'I've treated enough soldiers to last me a lifetime. I was a field nurse.' She explained in response to the girls cocked eyebrow, she supposed the habit she wore didn't exactly lend itself to the natural assumption of war.

'Wow. What was that like? You must have been terribly brave Sister!'

'I was needed. The Lord called me to there. Bravery had nothing to do with it.'

'You must have still been scared. My father always said that if you're not scared you're not paying attention.' The girl grinned as Sister Evangelina chuckled. She liked this girl, just the right amount of cheek to be joyful yet not immature.

'He sounds like a very wise man.'

'He was. How come you're here now then?'

'Appendicitis. They sent me back to recuperate and then they needed help here so I stayed.'

'Makes sense.'

'So how did you get into this state?' Shelagh blushed as she grinned wryly.

'Oh the usual story. Runaway pram, stopped it before it went down the flight of steps at the bottom of the hill, didn't stop it before I fell down the flight of steps.'

'Oh dear. Was the baby yours or are you a local hero?'

'The latter though I would scarcely call myself a hero-I only did what any decent person would do. I don't plan on having children for many years personally. I need to find myself a stable job first. Besides there's no way I'd bring a child into a world like this. '

'Very wise choice, I never had children as you can imagine. Well good on you for saving the baby- watch out for steps in the future.' Sister chuckled as she finished re-bandaging her leg.

'Will do. Thank you Sister. Same time tomorrow?'

'Same time tomorrow.' The nun nodded as she loved onto the next patient with a scarcely seen smile on her face.

Sister Evangelina didn't know what it was that drew her to the young Scottish lass but her daily dressings change soon became the high point of the nun's day. Sister Evangelina even found herself spending her lunch break and after work periods with the girl who was almost a third of her age. They had become firm friends and the nun had quickly nicknamed the girl Manny after her surname. Shelagh did not like her forename and calling her Mannion seemed impersonal. However, something was irking her and it was about time she addressed it.

'You're not really 18 are you?' She whirled an eyebrow as she lay down her cards.

'I'm sure I don't know what you're talking about Sister.'

'Don't give me all that young lady. Come on how old are you really?'

'16. Oh Sister please don't tell anyone!' Shelagh begged as she finally met her friends eyes, to her surprise instead of the expected annoyance and displeasure she was greeted with a knowing smile with more than a hint of amusement to it.

'Your medical records?'

'I had a friend alter my date of birth before I moved down here. They aren't the highest quality records but no one looks too closely when you're offering help.'

'Why did you do it? Why not stay up in Scotland or Coke with your true age?'

'The Lord told me I could help people here. My father was dead, I inherited money, he hid a lot in his mattress. I was done with Scotland, it was time to start afresh. After all damage the blitz did I thought there would be people who needed me in London so I packed up my clothes and my Bible, got on a train and here I am. I volunteer at a homeless shelter as you know but I never quite feel like I'm doing enough and Dad's money is running down. I need to be of age so that I can start to earn money for myself.'

'Have you considered finishing school? If you left at 15 then you probably don't have as much of an education as I think you want to have.'

'I would love to I really would, but I can't help people like that. There are people desperately in need of a helping hand, I can't give them that if I'm not there.'

'If you finish school then you can go to university-become a teacher or a nurse or something like that. Hopefully the war will be over by then and the pressing need wouldn't be so great.'

'True. But my papers are forged now. They'd never take me on.' Shelagh shrugged as she, badly, tried to hide how much it saddened her to reject her education.

'I could talk to someone for you-people tend to trust nuns you know. I won't tell them how old you really are-you felt called to do something, who am I to question that. It's how I ended up as Sister Evangelina and not just Enid.'

'Enid eh? I'll admit Evangelina suits you better, no offence. I'll think about your offer, it truly means a lot to be and I can do nothing more than thank you from the very bottom of my heart.'

'I'm really going to miss you Sister Evangelina. You're the first friend I've made in over a year. The first person who didn't see me as the poor little orphan or the tiny nameless woman in the shelter. Thank you. Thank you for getting me into school. You have truly turned my life around, I was blinded by all of the war and death that I forgot I had to live too.'

'You're very welcome. I'll miss you as well but are you sure you don't want me to contact social services?'

'I'm sure.'

'I think you know me well enough by now that I don't say this to other patients but please do visit. I'll be keeping my eye on you anyway but it'd be nice to see you. You know where my convent is don't you and I'll be here st the hospital most of the time. If I don't see you I'll pin you down myself.'

'I'm sure I can manage that. That's my taxi- goodbye Sister. I'll see you soon I promise.'

'See you soon Shelagh.' Sister Evangelina couldn't tear her eyes from the retreating car, she didn't doubt that the girl would visit, she only hoped it was very soon. Manny had become more than a friend to her, she was the closest thing she had to a sister, a true Sister not just one of Christ. Although she loved her religious sisters Manny was different.

1945

'Shelagh my dear come in!' Sister Mary Claire grinned as she swung the door to the convent open to see a very familiar face beaming back.

'Hello Sister Mary Claire. How's your cough doing?'

'Better thank you. Your idea of using heather tops was inspired my dear one.'

'My Grandmother would be very happy to know I listened to at least one of her herbal remedy lectures.' Shelagh laughed as she ushered into her second home.

'Indeed. And how is school? You must be almost finished now?'

'One month left now. Oh hello Sister Maria.' The giant of a nun waltzed in humming to herself.

'My dear. You're looking radiant as ever.'

'Thank you.' She kissed the nun on the cheek in thanks.

'I have to go see to Mrs Barker but if you're still here later we must catch up over a cup of Horlicks.'

'I look forward to it.' She turned back to the Sister-in-Charge. 'Is Sister Evangelina in?'

'Yes. When you rang to say you would visit she got rather joyful and got all of her rounds done in the morning. Not that she would admit it to anyone if asked.'

'Impressive.'

'She's in the kitchen.'

'Thank you Sister. Sister Evangelina?'

'Shelagh my dear.' She hugged the girl. 'How good to see you!'

'And you. Sister I was wondering if we might be able to talk in private?'

'Of course. Is everything alright?'

'I hope so.

'Well? Out with it!'

'We were asked at school what we wanted to do after we were done there. I couldn't help but think back to one of the first conversations we had, back when you realised my true age. I realised that there's only one thing I truly want to do. What I have to do.'

'I remember. You want to become a teacher or a nurse?' The nun was certain whatever the young woman chose to pursue she would excel at.

'Yes to the latter. But I want more than just that.'

'I don't follow.'

'Sister I want to become a nun. More specifically I want to be a nun within the Order of St Raymond Nonnatus. I want to be a midwife in Poplar. Nonnatus House is my home even if I don't live here. I feel called to this life. I believe God meant for us to meet that day, to set me on this path.'

'Shelagh. I'm thrilled you feel called to this life but you're so young. You're only 18-for real this time.' They smiled. 'If you still feel this way in a few years then I would be more than happy to support you but right now I just can't.'

'Sister-'

'No Shelagh. I'm sorry. I would be delighted to have you for my sister-you know I already view you as such.'

'I do.'

'You want to be a nurse and a midwife? How about this for a plan-you go to nursing college and qualify. You'll be 21 by then and will have lived more of life. You'll still be younger than most applicants but it's not as if you aren't familiar with the life.'

'But sister I feel the call now. Can't I join the order first?'

'I'm sorry. You'll still be welcome here and I'm sure Sister Mary Claire would be more than happy to let you join us in evening hymns. You should really be talking to her about this anyway.'

'I will. But it's your opinion I care about. You're the reason I was on the right path to receive this calling.'

'And you know I'll support you every step of the way but you cannot make a life changing decision at so young an age you have to understand that. Have I ever led you astray before?'

'Yes.' Shelagh grinned at the memory.

'Aside from that one time.'

'No. You haven't.' She sighed heavily. 'Alright. I'll wait until I finish nursing school. I trust you.'

'Good. I'm proud of you no matter what you decide. If you change your mind that'll be okay.'

'Thank you. But I won't.

'I'm so proud of you Mann-sorry-Nurse Mannion. You did good kiddo.'

'Thank you. You didn't need to throw me this party.'

'Sister Monica Joan is to blame. I was all for a cake but our resident party girl took charge in her natural way.'

'Bless her. How is she?'

'Still eccentric. Still a nightmare.'

'Be nice.' Shelagh elbowed her laughing, knowing full well how much Sister Evangelina cared for the elderly nun. She wrapped her hand around the nuns arm and leant against her. 'Sister thank you for everything you've done for me these past 5 years. You've turned my life around.'

'I did nothing of the sort. I just helped out a friend in need. You did all the hard work.'

'I still want to become a nun. I tried to live the secular life but I never found as much happiness in going out with friends as I did helping people and praying. It's what I'm meant to do.'

'Okay. We'll talk to Sister Mary Claire later today alright? With this national health service starting soon we'll be rushed off of our feet. I wouldn't be surprised if she let you train on the job right here.'

'That doctor you've oft complained about will be in his element. Though didn't you say he'd had a baby recently? His poor wife must be exhausted, she must never see him.'

'It's not my place to comment.'

'Of course.'

And so Shelagh Mannion, the young brave girl she'd watched grow into a young woman became Sister Bernadette and grew happier and more confident than ever. With the departure of Sisters Mary Claire and Maria, the arrival of Sister Julienne and the continued down spiral of Sister Monica Joan she soon found her place in Nonnatus. Though she had initially struggled with some of the restrictions now placed upon her she had been helped every step PF the way by Sister Evangelina. Their relationship was different-it had to. No longer were they Sister and the wayward waif she took under her wing but Sisters of Christ, living and working and worshipping together. Sister Bernadette no longer needed her hand holding and had found a kindred soul in the newly arrived head nun. Outwardly Sister Bernadette was closest to Sister Julienne but behind the curtain the closeness of a shared history and affection made Sister Evangelina her true kin.

Sister Julienne had looked heartbroken when she asked for clothes besides her habit. She daren't think of how Sister Evangelina would react. Truth be told she was too scared to tell her face to face though she knew she should. The nun had done so much for her and now she was throwing it all in her face. Oh but she loved Doctor Turner so very much. She knew she'd be happy with him and that's all sister Evangelina had ever wanted for her. And yet Shelagh couldn't face telling her to her face, instead relaying her message and an apology through the woman they both cherished.

As it turned out she wouldn't actually see Sister Evangelina for nearly two weeks. The christening of Freddie Noakes was the first time any of them had seen her since her engagement and the entire affair had been beyond awkward for Shelagh. Sister Evangelina barely looked at her and when she did the overriding look in her eye was sadness. Shelagh couldn't stand it and decided no matter how much she loved her Nonnatus family being with them would be too painful. So she ran, figuratively and literally, direct to Patrick who took her in his arms and made the world seem a little less terrible.

Then the world got even more terrible. Timothy was struck by polio and stuck in a horrible machine in a room she wasn't allowed in. Patrick was too busy to notice her heart breaking so she returned to her family. Sister Julienne may have been the one to take her hand and tuck her into bed but it was Sister Evangelina, who snuck into the side room when she thought Shelagh was asleep and held her hand through the night before slipping out just before dawn when Shelagh awoke, who helped her the most. Though their relationship still had a long way to go it was a start and the ice began to thaw.

She hasn't been able to leave Shelagh alone in the sideroom. She'd known her for so many years now and never before had she seen her so scared or so broken. No matter how much her girl had broken her heart and seemingly betrayed her she was still the 16 year old she had fallen in love with. She was still Manny.

Neither woman admitted to that night and the awkwardness returned though it was noticeably less than before. They still did not spend much time together however between Timothy's hospitalisation, the relocation of Nonnatus and the nurses monopolising Shelagh for wedding planning.

The next time she saw Shelagh for longer than a passing glance it was walking down the aisle to get married. She was absolutely stunning. It was all she could do not to start crying through the service. Her little girl was married, she had a husband and a home and a son now. Shelagh was so happy, anyone could see that. In the end, Sister Evangelina mused, that made the betrayal worth it. The pair were still far from reconciled but finally she could accept that the correct decision had been made.

Shelagh was hurting and Sister Evangelina didn't know why. She'd been so happy after the wedding yet as time went on she seemed to withdraw into herself once more. It broke her heart that the woman who had used to tell her anything keeping so quiet yet she couldn't find a way to approach Shelagh. She would open her mouth to say something kind yet every time a cutting remark or hurtful comment would come out. Every day she grew further from the woman she loved. Shelagh needed her but not in a way their bond had ever called for previously and the nun found herself scared, for the first time since the war, of losing someone dear to her and have it be her fault.

Salvation was finally found thanks to Vincent of all people. Shelagh had found him a bed in a hospital and the resultant conversation when she informed Sister Evangelina of it had finally allowed the slights they had made toward the other to be forgotten. They realised that they still cared deeply and uniquely for each other, no one else could comfort her with words Shelagh already knew. She was a mother already and she always would be, nobody could take that away from her no matter how much she may feel she was failing. Gone was the awkward interactions of Mrs Turner and the grumpy nun and here was Manny having sense talked into her by her big sister. Both shed tears of joy over the reunion and sorrow over the way they had let their relationship deteriorate.

When Shelagh told her Patrick and her were applying to become adoptive parents Sister Evangelina was over the moon. She'd almost suggested it weeks ago but didn't want to push Shelagh too soon. There was no doubt that the turners would be accepted in her eyes, both were dedicated and loving parents to Timothy and all three of them had so much love to give.

When Shelagh came sobbing into her rooms claiming she would never get to have a baby and would probably lose Tim as well as Patrick was going to leave her Sister Evangelina couldn't have been more shocked. Not least because it was 3 in the morning and the interview had been two days ago. After almost twenty minutes of incoherent hyperventilated words Shelagh finally managed to explain about the farcical events of the adoption interview, the nun was secretly proud of how even in this angst filled moment her sister managed to keep the details of whatever Patrick had held secret. She privately thought it may well be his internment at the psychiatric hospital but didn't mention it in case it was not and she revealed another secret. Suffice it to say Patrick got an earful the next morning, especially after Shelagh had gone home to discover that they had in deed been accepted and he had turned his back on her following the frank statement of how unhappy she was with the current state of their marriage.

She didn't pry too much into how they had reconciled, she had no wish to imagine Shelagh in that way, both as a sister and a Sister. Soon all strife had been forgotten with the sudden arrival of one Angela Turner. The nun had seen thousands of newborns but this babe was surely the most beautiful she had ever set eyes on, she was eclipsed only by how beautiful her mother looked holding her. She's never been so proud of the girl she had befriended all those years before.

With the departure of Jenny and Chummy taking up a temporary role at the mother and baby home new blood was needed. A new young nurse by the name of Gilbert arrived and was highly capable though a small part of the nun resented the fact that she was not Shelagh, before Angela she had been recovering from tuberculosis and looking after Tim following his illness so it seemed right for her to hold off from returning to nursing, but now with babe in arms and girls barely old enough to leave school filling the role she would have easily managed it seemed sorrowfully final. Gone was Sister Bernadette, gone was the Nurse Mannion they had envisioned in their long talks, gone was the potential for Nurse Turner. In her place was Mrs Turner, wife and mother, part-time medical secretary. Not that she was any worse off this way, both lifestyles were equally valid even if it pained the nun to think it. With the announcement of Shelagh's amended role came an admission of her own, 'womens problems', as her sister had so delicately referred to them as.

The months she spent apart from Shelagh and Nonnatus were very star age for the nun. She knew they were all in good hands with Nurse Crane now there to keep them on the straight and narrow but still she yearned to be the one looking after them all. By the time she had returned a significant change had occurred in Shelagh. Nurse Turner had arrived and looked even better in uniform than either could have ever imagined. Doctor Turner had collapsed from exhaustion as had long been her worry and Shelagh had stepped up. Angela was even more beautiful than when she had last seen her. So much had changed in such a short amount of time.

Their newly strengthened friendship faced few hurdles over the next half year, both believing that the strife was over between them. Until the breast is best argument reared its ugly head once more that is. Shelagh was hurt by her sisters stance, surely she must have seen that bottle feeding had its uses-Angela was a boisterous and healthy child who had not suffered at all for the breast deprivation. She knew, however, that was just how her sister was and thought nothing of it. Then Sister Evangelina left and couldn't bare to say goodbye to her in person. A long letter was instead exchanged through the hands of Patsy. It was a goodbye letter stating how proud she was of Shelagh, how much she loved her and hoped God would continue to look down upon her when the nun could not. Neither knew if they would ever meet again.

She did eventually return with even less notice than her departure. Shelagh found she couldn't be angry with the nun as she was following Gods path as she had done a few years before, she refused to let this time break them down. She was however heartbroken to realise what had happened to her sister in the time away. The pain soon turned to anger as the nun repeatedly refused to be looked over by Patrick and withdrew from her vocation. The nun would scarcely go near Angela in case she dropped her, the tot being insistent on being carried. All Turners were thrilled to hear of Sister Evangelina's discovery that bathing newborns was indeed something she could excel at and it seemed life was beginning the get back to normal.

The second stroke occurred mere hours later.

She was lost. Her sister was gone. That was only the beginning of the troubles for the day. Knowing the late nun as she did, she was acutely aware that Sister Evangelina would not have wanted them to neglect their duties and so Shelagh threw herself into the thalidomide scandal. It would be two days before Shelagh was able to visit Nonnatus. All present knew to allow the former nun some time alone and it was almost as hour before anyone but Patrick was allowed in to comfort her. Everyone assembled outside knew this and it was testament to the love both woman garnered from the community that not one single person complained about the delay or the waiting in the cold autumn air.

The funeral was held a few days later, a simple affair but filled with love.

Shelagh never forgot her sister, she would tell Angela as the girl grew up about her Aunt and in time Angela's own children would hear about the much missed woman who had put Shelagh on the right path from Manny to Granny.

I'm only a little sorry for this