Author's note: I just wanted to let you all know that this story has been floating around my computer for a VERY LONG time! As I post each chapter please be aware that I don't have a ton written, so you'll unfortunately have to bear with me as I attempt to find time to write some more & post it here for you all to read.

Meanwhile, as usual, the main characters do not belong to me, but to Joss & Mutant Enemy! I just happen to be borrowing them to play with for a while.

Also, please do NOT be afraid to criticize the story! CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM helps make me a better writer & therefore my story(s) better as well!

Now...onto the story! :) I hope everyone enjoys this story & leaves me some reviews (no matter how SHORT or LONG).

A*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*Z

The world around him is soft and gentle.

Filled with a bright glorious light that he never experienced on earth, a never-ending dream of beauty and contentment stretched out for him. A world, a gift that has been allowed to him, and him alone, his previous sins forgiven, his regrets gone, his being, what's left of it at least, to be treated not only as a man but as a hero.

And yet...

There's a feeling he's not really supposed to be here. That another place entirely separate from this world is calling to him...memories almost forgotten occasionally flutter across his mind 'Made a promise to a lady'. And for a moment he understands what he has to do, must in fact.

But then the moment passes and he is left with only the sound of silence and the vague awareness that he should be doing something.

"William?"

A voice seems to fill the entire space, a voice neither soft nor loud, neither male nor female, just a voice with a presence

'William', the name brings feelings that he can't quite reach, as though an entire lifetime is on the tip of his tongue. Slowly he repeats the word aloud repeatedly until it becomes nothing more than a flowing sound of letters and syllables.

"That was your name once."

He stops; the silence seeps in filling the space where his voice once was. William? Yes, he was William. William of London, an only heir. Once sponsored by a kind and loving mother and absent father. Quiet William, almost unnoticed until...until…

"Do you remember?"

"The Change."

Hardly a sentence but those two words and a flurry of memories invade his mind, everything rushing back. Vampires, monsters, wars, blood, Drusilla, Angelus, Darla, Germany, France, Italy, America, and Sunnydale. Ah Sunnydale. What a name, what a place, what a girl. Who…who was this girl? Whose memory could stir up such strong emotions?

'Mustn't hurt the girl.', 'You're the one.', 'I want to see how it ends.', 'I love you.' More memories wash over him and this time they leave a mark; a name in his mouth.

"Buffy." He says it gently, scared that merely saying it may make the very word break. But it doesn't, it becomes stronger, a glowing shimmer of light in his mind's eye, leading him back to what was lost.

The voice sighs, gently causing soft whispers around the room. "You are finally finished, complete again."

Spike blinks, the voice, ah yes, he'd forgotten all about the voice. "I uh...you what?"

"This was a gift to you, a place to heal. You were wounded, in the battle."

"With Angel?"

"Yes. Terribly wounded, mortally so, and if you were mortal well...your time in that dimension would have been over. However, the Powers that Be decided to present you with a gift, a heaven-like dimension in which you had time to heal, and when you were fully recovered you were to make a choice."

"Heaven?" he asks astonished. "Wait a minute, 'this' is Heaven?"

"Not quite, but very close. It's very rare, and truly an honor."

"Uh, well then. Right. Uh...thanks for that."

"So now comes the time for you to make your choice young vampire; you may stay here, or return to your previous dimension."

"I'd like to go back."

There was a small pause and Spike was almost positive he heard a sharp intake of breath, ominous voices could breathe it seemed. Then silence, a long stretched out gap of silence.

"Nice Mr. Detached Voice, I'd like to go back please."

"...Are you sure?"

"Very."

"Well...I...I don't think I understand."

Spike rolled his eyes and sighed. "Look mate, I don't know how to say this any clearer. I want to leave; Now, if possible."

"You understand where you are, do you not? This is the closest thing to heaven that any vampire has been allowed to taste in centuries; in this place, there is no pain, no conflict. Here you are welcomed by inner peace, hailed as a hero. You would want to leave all that?"

"Pretty much."

The voice paused again. "I still do not understand."

Spike sighed, "Okay, let's work through this. The fluffy white clouds, the wanting nothing, the happiness of sweet contentment is all very nice, but I've got somewhere I need to be."

"I see, and what is this place you speak of?"

"I uh…" Spike paused unsure how to phrase the niggled in words; that sense of something calling for him. Somewhere his soul longed to be. "I'm not entirely sure."

"Intriguing; you wish to give up true paradise for something you can't name. You do understand you can't come back here, don't you? This place is awarded but once, and one such as you is rarely allowed in."

"Yeah, yeah, I know; all dogs go to heaven, all vampires to the hot fiery hell of the underworld."

"You mock such a wondrous gift?"

"No. You've all been great…with the healing and the contentment bit. It's just. I've uh...I've got an itch so to speak. I have to go, so, mind conjuring up an exit for me?"

"...Your mind cannot be changed?"

"I'm renowned for my stubbornness."

"Very well, I suppose it is decided then…your choice has been made." The voice paused. When it spoke again, the words seemed to fill with regret. "Where is it we should place you?"

Spike blinked. "I uh, you what?!"

"I'm told your previous dimension was a rather grand place, a trite bigger than here. We would not want you to have to travel a great deal to relieve your...how did you put it...Itch?"

"I uh, well; you see...the thing is."

"Yes?"

"I don't know."

"That could be a problem then."

"Now who's mocking?"

The voice laughed lightly. "Perhaps if you wish to return to the humans, you should think as a human. What does your 'heart' want?"

Spike slowly closed his eyes. For a moment, he was silent, still. Then softly, a barely audible word came from his lips. "Home."

He wasn't sure where it was but the very feelings it gave him to say the word told him he had made the right choice. Home, yes that was what he wanted, more than a soft quiet world, more than inner peace, more than being a hero...he wanted to be home.

"So shall it be." And then the voice's presence was gone.