I sat on the couch, boredly watching TV- wishing for something better to come on.

'Seriously...who writes this junk?' I thought, readjusting myself on the couch.

I contemplated whether or not I wanted to get up and read a book instead, but in all honesty, I didn't feel like getting up and taking the bus down to the library. Oh sure, we had books here...but I've read all of them before, a new book might help.

'There goes the mail truck...' I thought, staring out the window, watching the white and blue van pass the house.

My back popped as I stood up and stretched- I walked to the door, and opened it, I stepped out and something on the ground caught my eye. I looked down, and saw a large crate marked 'Aperture Laboratories' sitting on the ground. I stared in confusion at the box, the wooden crate donning the Aperture logo, and just...sitting there...

'It's not going to blow up...is it?'

Maybe it was a prank? My friends did stuff like this all the time, though this was a bit out of their range- they were more like the type to put a whoopee cushion on your chair. So I liked Portal, so what? It didn't mean I played it every minute of the day.

I picked up a nearby stick, and poked the box- what? It supposedly came from Aperture, I can't be too careful! Anyway, the box didn't burst into flames or anything, so I deemed it safe. I grabbed the box, and attempted to pick it up.

'This is pretty heavy for an empty box...' I thought, struggling to bring the box into the house.

It was a little difficult fitting the box through the front door, but I finally managed to get it into the house. I flopped onto the couch, exhausted, as the box sat just a few feet away.

I took a few minutes to rest before I got up and went to the box, the screws holding the panels in place were tightly secured, whoever sent this obviously put a lot of thought into this.

I fetched a crowbar from the garage, and slid the bent end under the lid. I heaved on it, forcing as much of my weight on it as I could. The lid groaned in protest as it came free, I then went to the other side and did the same to the other end of the lid. I set the lid against the box, and peered into the box. Nothing of particular interest was in there, just alot of packing peanuts. I dug around in the box, somewhat hesitant, as I was afraid something might leap out and bite me. My hand finally hit something hard, and I got a firm grip on it before removing it.

'Huh...instruction manual...' I thought, flipping through the booklet.
It was an instruction manual for a turret.

'Odd...wonder what else is in here...'

I rummaged through the box once more, and finally found what I was looking for. I removed the egg-shaped object, and glanced at it, before setting it down.

'That's weird...someone actually put a turret in there...' I thought, staring down at it.

"...once your product has been removed from the packaging, it should activate upon...the sound...of your...voice..."

I gulped as the turret came to life, the red, radial eye glowing as I stared.

The turret tilted back, staring me in the eye. I jumped as the turret's voice echoed through out the room.

"Hel~lo" it said.

I ducked behind the couch in fear of the turret turning me into swiss cheese- toy or not, I wasn't taking any chances.

"Hel~lo?" it asked again.
"Um...hi" I said, taking a chance.
"Are you there?"
"..."

'Pleasedon'tshootmepleasedon'tshootmepleasedon'tshootme' I begged silently.

"Are you there?" it asked again.
"..."

"I'm different" it said.

'What? They don't say that...unless...'

I took a deep breath, and stood up.

"H-hello" I said.
"Hello" it responded.

"Are you...um...are you going to shoot at me?" I asked, ready to duck behind the couch once more.
"Do you want me to?"
"Um...no"
"Then I won't"

'Oh thank god...'

"So...um...what are you doing here?"

"I don't know yet" it, or rather, she said.

"Oh...well...where should we go from here?"

"What were you doing before?"

"I was, um, sitting here"

"Very well, let us continue the sitting"

'This is nuts...' I thought picking up the turret and setting it on the couch.

"I need to clean some of this up first, I'll be there in a few minutes" I said.

The turret turned, and stared blankly ahead of it.

A/N: Oddly enough, this was inspired by Harry101UK's 'Defective'. The link to the video is below.
watch?v=U_0BapT0mOQ