Undertaker
Journal
March 17th 1878
Well, not too bad a day if I must say. Just got around to finishing Mrs. Bradley. And I'm going to say right now, for a woman who was killed by a shot gun, blown her chest clean off and it was surprisingly easy. I managed to get the stuffing out, it's been a while since I used that. I made her look beautiful again! And her family seemed to like her too! Mind you, I did kind of make her look like Merry Shelly but they didn't mind. It pretty much improved her. So I didn't think they'd need her insides so….I decided to keep them. And what did I decide to do with them? Dinner. The small intestines worked very well in a hot dog bun and the heart was lovely on toast. Unfortunately my cook book was rejected for being too "controversial". Still, their loss. If ever the Phantomhive brat and his infernal Butler come along, I'll offer them up the leftovers for lunch. See what they think! Still, it was a good day on the whole, productive is the word I'd use. Hope I can do the same tomorrow.
March 18th 1878
Well today I got an unexpected visit. Some new Reaper called Axel. Wow, what a brat! Comes in all full of himself and asks about some…thing I can't remember. To hell with my gammy memory. I tell you, Reapers today are not what they used to be. I remember in my day, Reapers used to be a force to be reckoned with. And the people back then where so much better at accepting the bad news then they are now. Now a days it's all "Please don't it's not my time yet blah, blah, blah!" Back then they took it much better! My favourite was Henry 8th from about 200 years ago. Wow the 1660's were the prime of my dating years. Back then, ladies would go out with anything with long silver hair! But yeah, I got the task of Reaping Henry Tudor. I got there and he was actually waiting for me. Freaked my young self out a bit but once we got talking, he was actually a good bloke! Turns out the history books really over exaggerated him, seems the wife's were more responsible then he was. But after a good long chat he asked me to do it, yes he actually asked! So yeah, Reaped him and his Cinematic Records…ooh boy! Lucky I kept them for good measure, they're my Friday night horror movie flick. So if anyone wants me to help with a history report, they'd better be over 18!
March 19th 1878
Well speak of the devil! That brat Phantomhive came to me today. Looks like he's trying to find some other murder again. So long as he/she/them/it doesn't make much of a mess of things like Jack the Ripper. Oh I can tell you, I wanted to scythe him so much after that! Still didn't stop me from doing a good job on Madam Red. But anyway, I made an effort to make a new batch of Bone Cookies for him. Tried out a new flavour from my (unpublished) cook book. Mixed up the normal cookie recipe but instead of milk, I used blood. They taste just right, but a tad unfortunate the colour didn't change. I'd have thought they'd change red. But still, the brat enjoyed them! And the look on the Butler's face! He knew exactly what was in there! And he didn't tell the kid! Oh that made my day! That's why I didn't ask for the standard payment! Oh perfect. Anyway, aside from that, not much to report today. Pretty boring after that. Just gave them the standard amount of info. Well so far only one person I needed to pretty up this week. Hope I get more soon, it's not like money is a rarity but I just enjoy it too much! Well, we'll see what tomorrow brings shall we?